Crying Uncle
Author: Vikki
Rating: G
Disclaimer: The SMK characters and the Agency belong to Warner
Brothers, Shoot the Moon Productions, and a bunch of other folks more fortunate
than I am. I am merely borrowing them for fun without profit.
This story is mine, however, so please don't reproduce without my permission.
Timeframe / Synopsis: The main time frame is early 1988;
Lee and Amanda's marriage is common knowledge. Interspersed between
the 1988 scenes are scenes from Lee's childhood. These are not memories:
they are "windows" through which we see important people from his past.
Beyond the opportunity to see how past events have shaped Lee's personality
and relationship with his uncle, there really isn't any plot, so don't
be surprised when you don't find one.
Note: This story does not break canon, exactly. However,
it does employ a great deal of "literary license" to fill in unknowns from
Lee's past. Also, where inconsistencies exist in the writing of the
show, I have "chosen" canon as follows: (1) Lee's parents died when
he was five (as per "Unfinished Business"); (2) Lee went to live
with his uncle when he was seven (as stated by Colonel Clayton in "A Relative
Situation); (3) Lee's paternal grandmother was still living when
his parents died (as shown in the State Department papers in "Unfinished
Business").
Feedback: Yes, any constructive comments are welcome.
THANKS to Dix, Pam and Tricia, all of whom reviewed this story for me.
And a special thanks to Dix's unique filing system, without which this
idea never would have evolved beyond a synopsis and two scenes.
***********************************
Lee Stetson pressed himself against the wall as he moved slowly and
soundlessly down the carpeted hallway. Coming to a halt before one
of several identical doors, he paused to listen for any evidence of activity
within, then he carefully turned the knob and pushed the door open just
enough to allow him to pass into the dimly lit room. Peering through
the semi-darkness, his eyes immediately focused on his goal : a sleek hand
carved secretariat desk against the far wall, just to the right of the
lace-curtained window through which the early morning sun provided the
only source of light.
After a quick but intense visual sweep of the room, he moved stealthily
toward the desk. He had almost reached it when a slight movement
caught his attention, and he pivoted to confront the shadowy figure which
had slipped quietly into step behind him.
A tender smile crossed Lee's features as he slid one arm around a slender
waist and dropped a light kiss on his wife's forehead. "Good morning,
beautiful," he murmured. "I didn't mean to wake you. I forgot
your shopping list."
Amanda wrapped both arms around him and rested her head against his
shoulder as he placed second kiss on her slightly tangled chestnut curls.
Stifling a yawn, she responded in a sleepy voice. "That's okay.
I need to be up. I want to freshen the guest room before you get
back from the grocery store."
Tightening his arm around her, Lee moved his other hand to her chin,
gently raising her head so he could search her coffee brown eyes.
"You're supposed to be resting," he chided softly. "The Colonel doesn't
expect you to go to any trouble. He's used to pretty stark accommodations."
She wrinkled her nose and rolled her eyes, clearly incredulous that
anyone would consider such a basic attention to the comfort of a guest
unnecessary. "It isn't any trouble, Lee," she lectured in the tone
usually reserved for explaining the fundamental tenets of good housekeeping
to her sons. "And I want to do it. He's part of my family now,
just like Mother and Phillip and Jamie are part of yours."
Lee shook his head and chuckled. "I definitely got the better end of
that deal."
Amanda's eyes twinkled as her lips twitched into the barest hint of
an amused smile. "Well, I can't argue with that," she agreed.
"But this is the first time he's come to stay with us, and I want everything
to be, you know, extra nice. Although it would be easier," she added
with mock severity, "if someone would tell me what he likes and what he
doesn't, so I wouldn't have to guess."
Lee studied her wordlessly for moment before a rueful laugh escaped
him. "If you want everything to be just the way the Colonel likes
it, maybe I should bunk down at the Agency for a few nights. Billy's
always willing to set up a cot in the TAC center for an agent on evasive
maneuvers."
Amanda pursed her lips in silent admonishment and swatted his arm reprovingly.
"That's not funny," she finally said, her voice something between a sigh
and a chuckle. "The way you've been acting, a person would think
this visit was some new form of KGB torture."
"I know," Lee responded with a slightly sheepish grin. "I'm thirty-seven
years old, and the Colonel still makes me feel like I'm a new Army recruit
about to fail my first white glove inspection."
Amanda arched a delicate brow as she studied him appraisingly. "Maybe
it would help if you were a little less formal," she suggested gently.
"You call mother's sister 'Aunt Lillian.' Have you ever tried calling
him 'Uncle Robert'?"
Lee cocked his head and squinted as though looking back in time.
"Not that I remember," he said slowly.
**********************
Jennifer Stetson smiled indulgently as a small blonde boy whirled into
the kitchen, a toy helicopter clutched in one grubby fist and a miniature
soldier clutched in the other. Even though he was not quite five
years old, Lee was already the image of his father, and he could wrap her
around his little finger almost as easily. "Mommy, Mommy, is Uncle
Robert comin' for my birthday?" her son asked, fixing her with wide
hazel eyes and an engaging grin.
Jennifer sighed. She hated to disappoint him, but it couldn't
be helped. "No, I'm sorry, darling. Uncle Robert won't be able
to come this time," she answered, reaching out to tousle his already mussed
hair.
"Why not, Mommy?" the child asked plaintively, his smile melting into
a slight pout. "He said next time he comed he'd take me for a ride
in a real helicopter," he reminded his mother, bouncing slightly on the
balls of his feet in anticipation of the promised treat. "Just like
the one he flew in the war. It'd be the bestest birthday present
ever."
"I'm sure it would be the *best* birthday present ever," Jennifer corrected
automatically, kneeling to face him and placing both hands on his shoulders
to still his exuberant movements, "and your Uncle Robert would love
to be here. But he's out of the country, and he can't come home right
now."
"Is he swooping down and rescuing people, like he did in the war?" Lee's
pout vanished, excitement suddenly sparkling again in his eyes. As
he spoke, the toy helicopter sprang to life, propelled by its young pilot
in a series of ascents and dives around his mother's head.
"No, not this time," Jennifer responded as she intercepted her son's
hand just in time to prevent the helicopter's imminent collision with her
left ear. "He's on training maneuvers."
The boy frowned and cocked his head slightly, apparently mulling over
this puzzling adult behavior. "Why'd he hafta go on trainin' manubers?
He's already the *best* pilot ever." He offered his mother a beguiling
smile as he emphasized the corrected pronunciation.
She rewarded his effort with a brief hug and a quick kiss on the head.
"Well, your uncle is a very good pilot. But even though the war is
over, he needs to practice, so he'll be ready," she explained in patient
tones.
"Ready to swoop down and rescue people?" With only one of his mother's
hands remaining on his shoulder, Lee managed to resume his bouncing.
Jennifer sighed again Ever since Robert had told Lee about flying
search and rescue missions during the police action in Korea, her son had
been obsessed with the idea of rescuing people. "Yes, honey.
He has to be ready to swoop down and rescue people. That's one of
his jobs, in the Air Force."
"When I grow up, I'm gonna be just like Uncle Robert. I'm gonna
swoop down and rescue people, too." With that, Lee extricated
himself from his mother's loose embrace and whirled back toward the living
room to rescue more toy soldiers from the the imaginary dangers lurking
there.
Jennifer gazed after him, smiling wistfully. Not quite five, and
he already wanted to save the world. Just like his uncle; just
like his daddy. Saving the world had its rewards, of course, but
it wasn't the kind of life she wanted for her son. Maybe, with her
influence, he would grow up to be a doctor or an attorney instead of a
soldier or, heaven forbid, a spy. What she wanted for her son
was a nice, normal life. That was one reason she and Matt were in
this line of work themselves - so their children would be able
to grow up in a safe, secure world. With a slight grimace and a shake
of her dark curls, she turned her attention back to the meatloaf she was
making for dinner.
********************************
"Meatloaf," Amanda muttered skeptically, as she perused the shopping
list she had retrieved from her desk. "Are you really sure you want
meatloaf for dinner tonight, Lee? Meatloaf's easy, and it's filling,
but it's not very, um," she paused and shrugged her shoulders delicately.
"Well, what I mean is, meatloaf's kind of ordinary, for a guest."
"I like your meatloaf," was the simple reply, spoken in a tone that
left no doubt as to her husband's sincerity. "I know it isn't exactly
gourmet fare, but it's . . . homey. It makes me feel like I'm home,
where I belong."
"All right, if that's what you want." Amanda smiled warmly, reaching
out to squeeze his fingers between her own. "Let's go down to the
kitchen, so I can check this list one more time. I don't want you
to have to make two trips. It's a lot further to a supermarket from
this house than it was from the house in Arlington."
As they moved toward the doorway, Lee swiped up Amanda's robe from the
foot of the large four poster bed and held it as she slipped her arms inside.
Then he waited while she pulled the belt snugly around her waist before
taking her hand again and leading her through the door.
They walked in companionable silence toward the stairs. As they
passed the open guest room door, however, Lee paused and turned to her
with a concerned frown. "I meant what I said earlier, Amanda," he
lectured. "You're supposed to be resting today. I don't want
you to overdo."
"I'm not going to overdo," she promised, leaning against him to brush
her lips against his cheek. "How much effort do you think it will
take to dust a dresser, run a vacuum cleaner, and make up a bed?"
"Is the vacuum cleaner upstairs? I don't want you lugging it up
the steps."
"Jamie carried it up for me yesterday, before Joe took the boys for
the night," she answered casually, moving away from him to examine
the large potted plant which resided on the second floor landing.
Something in her tone and actions made Lee look at her suspiciously.
"Joe wasn't upset, was he? About Phillip and Jamie coming home this
afternoon instead of tomorrow?"
"Not really," she hedged, stooping to finger the soil in the earthenware
pot and effectively avoiding her husband's eyes as she answered. "I need
to water this ficus later. Don't let me forget."
Lee's eyes narrowed as he closed the space between them and recaptured
her hand to gently pull her upright. "You can't distract me that
easily, Amanda. 'Not really' sounds more like a yes than a no."
"He really *wasn't* upset about them coming home early," she sighed.
"He didn't have anything special planned for this weekend. I think
it just bothered him a little that the boys agreed to cut his weekend short
without any argument. He's a kind of sensitive about how close Phillip
and Jamie have gotten to you, especially since you handle some of their
antics better than he does."
"He'd do a lot better if he'd loosen up," Lee opined sagely, with the
newfound confidence of a man who had lived for six months under the same
roof as the two teenagers. "Joe takes their bickering and sniping
at each other way too seriously. He should know boys do stuff like
that. It doesn't mean anything."
"I know," Amanda agreed, exasperation with her ex-husband written clearly
on her expressive face. "He can't see that forcing them to spend
time together doesn't make them closer; it just causes them to get on each
other's nerves."
"I'm glad to hear you say that," Lee laughed. "I wouldn't want
to find myself locked in a room with my uncle for a day of male bonding."
****************************
Matthew Stetson set down his pipe and rubbed his eyes. He needed
some fresh air. Although he was pleased that he and Jennie had been
able to convert their home's forgotten jam cellar into a secret office
and hideaway, the tiny, windowless room made him feel a bit claustrophobic.
Laughing softly, he recalled the time he had spent the better part of a
day trapped in his grandparents' root cellar with his younger half-brother,
Robert Clayton. That experience was probably the reason he and Rob
both disliked dark, cramped places. Of course, he and Rob were similar
in many ways. The two boys, now men, shared very little physical
resemblance, but they were much alike in temperament, and they had always
been close. In fact, they had been nearly inseparable during the
early years of their lives - until their careers had separated them,
often by thousands of miles and months at at time.
Thinking of his brother reminded Matthew of his decision to tell the
other man about this hidden room. He would feel much more secure
knowing that Rob was helping guard his secret. The last two assignments
he and Jennie handled had been more complicated - and more
risky - than he liked. And he had a nagging, unsettling
feeling about the Blackthorne case. He couldn't quite put his finger
on it, but there was something about Thomas Blackthorne that. . . .
Well, he would be glad when the investigation was over and Blackthorne
was behind bars, where he belonged.
Matthew grimaced and pushed aside the file he had been reading.
He knew his work was important, but he didn't enjoy it as much now as he
had ten years ago. Adventure and danger weren't quite as appealing
to a man who had things to live for. And he couldn't help berating
himself for getting Jennie involved in such a dangerous lifestyle.
Jennie was very good at at investigative work, her sharp mind and never
ending patience providing the perfect compliment to his more physical skills,
and she found their work rewarding in a quiet, understated way. But
Matthew knew she didn't care for what she laughingly called 'the seamy
side of detective work.' Besides which, they had Lee to consider.
If anything should happen to them. . . . Yes, telling Rob would
make him feel a good deal better; he knew he could count on his brother
to step in if anything went wrong.
Rising from the hard-backed chair, Matthew pulled the chain that controlled
the room's solitary light bulb. As darkness closed in around him,
he climbed up the wooden ladder and pulled himself out through the small,
square opening. Easing the trap door shut, he carefully replaced
the carpet that concealed it from casual observers. Only when he
moved to the stairs did he notice his son sitting on the top step, watching
his progress.
"Lee, what are you doing here?" he intoned sternly. "You
know the basement is off limits."
"But I'm not in the basement, Daddy," Lee pointed out with perfect five
year old logic. "I'm way up over the basement."
Matthew paused at the bottom of the staircase, looking up at the small,
obviously unrepentant, boy. "The stairs are part of the basement,
and you aren't supposed to be here," he stated, careful not to show his
amusement at his son's rapidly growing power of persuasion.
"I'm five now, Daddy," Lee reminded his father in his most grownup manner.
"Isn't five big enough to go through the secret door?"
"No, Lee. Five isn't big enough," Matthew responded, climbing
the steps and leaning down to lift his son to his feet.
"Is six big enough? I'll be six on my next birthday," his son queried
doggedly.
"Your next birthday isn't for a long, long time," Matthew countered.
"And you need to be a lot bigger than six," he added, hoping to curtail
what he knew from experience could prove to be a long and onerous debate.
"Is twenny big enough?" the boy persisted. "I hafta be able to
go through the secret door when I'm twenny 'cause twenny's as big as I
can count."
Matthew gave up the effort to hold in his amusement. Smiling broadly,
he lifted his son into his arms, opened the basement door, and stepped
into the brightness of the hallway. "When you're twenty, we'll discuss
it," he promised. "But for now, I want you to forget all about the
secret door; do you understand?"
"Uh huh," was the uncharacteristically glum response. A moment
later, however, his son's eyes brightened. "When I play at Johnny's
house, we go in the basement. Johnny has a baby brother. Maybe
he got a baby brother 'stead of a secret door."
"Maybe he did," his father agreed with an amused chuckle.
"Do you think I could have a baby brother since I hafta forget the secret
door?" Lee questioned ingenuously.
Matthew laughed again. "Baby brothers are pretty special," he
said with a conspiratorial wink. "But that's something we'll have
to talk over with mommy."
********************************
"It's too bad Joe didn't have a brother," Amanda lamented as they moved
slowly down the stairs and traversed the short hallway into the sunlit
kitchen. "It might have helped him understand Phillip and Jamie better.
Although," she continued, eying her husband, "you didn't have a brother,
and you seem to understand them pretty well."
Lee laughed softly. "I have you. I didn't need to figure
them out for myself."
"You also had at least one example," she pointed out, arching an eyebrow
as she gazed at him speculatively. "Were your uncle and your father
close?"
"I don't know." Lee shrugged, shifting uncomfortably under her
scrutiny. "The Colonel never said."
Amanda paused for a moment. "And I'll bet you never asked."
Lee took a step away, his stance guarded and his expression unreadable.
"I guess it's a good question," he finally admitted. "I've just never
thought about it."
"Maybe you *should* think about it," Amanda suggested softly.
"He's the only living blood relative you have, at least for five and a
half more months," she added, trailing one hand over her slightly
rounded abdomen. "Aren't you even a little curious? He could
probably answer a lot of questions you've never thought about, and someday
he won't be around."
"Yeah, I guess," Lee mumbled noncommittally as he wrapped both arms
around her from behind. She leaned back into his chest, and they
stood for several moments, enjoying the unaccustomed morning silence and
their own thoughts.
The quiet was broken by a sudden clattering noise. Lee reached
reflexively toward his left side, where he normally carried his gun, but
almost immediately he relaxed again. "If Wizard is going to live
in the utility closet, we're going to have to clean it out," he grumbled.
"With all the clutter in there, he's constantly knocking things over."
"It's only temporary, " Amanda murmured sympathetically, glancing toward
the utility closet, its door slightly ajar to allow their new pet access
to his chosen retreat. "I know he's a little skittish, but . . .
."
"A little skittish?" Lee interrupted with a snort. "Amanda,
we got him almost a week ago, and I can count on one hand the number of
times I've even seen him."
"He needs some time to settle in and get used to us - just
like you did a few months ago."
"Well, you've got me there," Lee conceded. "If your utility closet
in Arlington had been bigger, I would have ducked in there more than a
few times during the first few weeks after I moved in."
With a laugh, Amanda walked across the kitchen, opened a cabinet and
removed a small can of kitten food. "At least he usually comes out
when he's hungry." Carefully removing the lid from the can, she scooped
the contents into a plastic bowl and moved to a position just outside the
utility closet. Placing the bowl on the floor, she began calling
softly "Here kitty, kitty. Here kitty, kitty."
After a moment, a tiny pink nose and several long white whiskers appeared
at the open door. Two small white paws and a black and white head
slowly emerged, their owner moving apprehensively toward his breakfast.
Just before he reached the bowl, however, the shrill ring of the phone
caused him to freeze momentarily and then scamper back into his hiding
place.
As Lee shook his head and reached for the phone, Amanda knelt down near
the bowl to resume her efforts to coax their newest family member into
the room..
**********************
Eileen Stetson Clayton knelt in front of the closet, attempting to coax
her five year old grandson from its depths. Behind her, Captain
Robert Clayton stood awkwardly, clearly feeling out of place in the room
where, until only a few days ago, his brother and sister-in-law had slept.
"Lee, come out and say hello to your Uncle Robert. He came all the
way from Germany to see us," Eileen urged gently.
"No." Lee Stetson poked his blonde head out and glared at the
man behind his grandmother, then just as quickly he disappeared again.
"Lee, please come out. I know you've missed Uncle Robert," his
grandmother tried again, her voice soft and pleading.
"I don't wanna see him," came the muffled reply.
With a shake of her head, Eileen stood and turned to face her
surviving son. Surviving son: she hated the sound of that.
Children were supposed to survive their parents, not the other way around.
She had been certain she had borne the worst pain life could offer when
she buried her second husband, but this. . . . It was still almost
surreal, the concept of losing Matt and Jennie. She didn't want to
deal with such unimaginable grief herself, much less be responsible for
helping her small grandson through it. "He's been sitting in there
for nearly three days," Eileen sighed weakly. "I really hoped he
would come out when you got here; he's always been so fond of you."
"I should have been here sooner," Robert Clayton growled, as he
began pacing across the small room. "The military transport got diverted
to Greenland, and we were weathered in for almost two days."
"You got here as soon as you could. It's not your fault.
You did your best to . . . . " Eileen began, trying to force her thoughts
to back their most immediate problem.
Whatever else she meant to say was cut off as Lee suddenly emerged from
his hiding place to confront the his uncle. "It *is* your fault!"
the boy shouted, angry tears sparkling in his hazel eyes. "It's your
fault my mommy and daddy died. You're supposed to swoop down and
rescue people. It's your job!!" he yelled, launching himself
into his uncle, his small fists pummeling Robert Clayton's midsection.
"I hate you. I hate you." Then, almost as suddenly as the assault
had begun, Lee whirled around and disappeared back into the dark closet.
The stunned captain stepped toward the closet, only to be restrained
by his mother's gentle hand on his arm. "Let him go, Robby.
He's still reeling from losing Matt and Jennie. Give him some time."
Robert Clayton looked sadly into the hazel eyes of his mother.
"Maybe he's right. Maybe it is my fault. If I had been here.
. . ."
"What? You think you're responsible for a hit-and-run driver forcing
them off the road? Don't be ridiculous," Eileen admonished him sharply.
"I've heard rumors of some kind of investigation. Maybe it wasn't
an accident. Maybe Matt was involved in something dangerous, something
that got out of hand," the Captain argued.
"Just stop it right now, Robert Clayton," Eileen ordered, exhaustion
and irritation overcoming better judgment. "Matt and Jennie
were in an accident. And you aren't responsible for every bad thing
that happens in the world. You weren't responsible for this.
You weren't responsible for your dad's death in the war. You weren't
responsible for Maggie's plane going down. . . . " Eileen stopped abruptly.
She hadn't meant to reopen old wounds; she was just so tired.
The young man stiffened, his face a mask of self-recrimination.
"Maggie was on her way to visit me," he said tonelessly. "I shouldn't
have been so impatient. I could have waited a few months to see her;
I would have been home for the wedding. But I talked her into. .
. . "
"Stop it, " his mother demanded, more gently this time. "We don't
have time for this. We have to decide what to do about Lee. "
Robert Clayton's brows rose in surprise. "What to do about Lee,"
he repeated blankly. "He's going to stay with you, isn't he?"
"He is for now. But you know you'll have to make a home for him
someday. I'm not a young woman." Looking from her
son's suddenly panic-stricken face to the dark closet, Eileen sighed again.
Then she took Robert's arm and nudged him out of the room.
"Let's go down to the kitchen. You must be starving, and I could
use a cup of tea."
*****************************************
"I'm going to make myself a cup of tea." Amanda glanced at her husband
as she abandoned her position beside the kitten's bowl. "Do you want
anything?"
"No, thanks." Lee frowned and shook his head, absently passing the phone
receiver from hand to hand several times before replacing it in the cradle.
"The Colonel's aide said his flight plan was changed; he's going
to be here three hours earlier than we expected."
Amanda bit her lip as she cast a worried look toward the kitchen clock,
but when she spoke, her tone was light. "That's not a problem.
I'll shower and dress while you're at the store, and if I don't have time
to finish the guest room before we leave for the air base, I'll do it after
we get home."
"He's going to meet us at the Officer's Club," Lee muttered, still directing
a preoccupied frown at the phone. Then he shook his head again and
crossed the room to his wife's side. "And the first thing you're
going to do is have your tea," he stated firmly as he placed an arm around
her shoulders and guided her toward the table. "I'll fix you a cup
and a piece of toast before I leave for the store."
"I'm not an invalid, Lee," she protested as she snuggled against his
side. "I'm almost past the morning sickness. You don't have
to baby me."
"I know I don't have to," he acknowledged, pulling her against his chest
and nuzzling her neck. "I want to." Wrapping both arms around her,
his voice lowered to a seductive whisper. "Although it wouldn't take
much encouragement for me to forget all about your tea. . ." he began,
dropping a kiss on her nose, ". . . the grocery store. . ." he added as
he brushed his lips against hers, ". . . and the Colonel," he finished,
capturing her mouth in a deepening kiss.
A loud growl from Amanda's stomach caused him to pull back with an amused
chuckle. "We've always had a problem with timing," he quipped.
"But I think this is the first time you've actually growled at me."
"Sorry." Amanda's eyes danced as she rubbed a hand over her rumbling
midsection. "I guess my stomach took that offer of tea and toast
more seriously than my lips did."
"Then we'd better feed you." With another quick kiss, Lee released
her and pushed her gently into a chair, then turned back to the counter
to prepare her breakfast. "I don't remember seeing these before,"
he commented a few minutes later as he carried a dainty china teapot and
a matching cup and saucer to the table. "They're very pretty."
"Mother gave the set to me yesterday. It was packed away in one
of the boxes from the attic in Arlington." A reminiscent smile crossed
Amanda's features as she fingered the floral pattern of the cup.
"She thought it might increase the appeal of decaffeinated tea," she added
as she turned to Lee with a lopsided grin.
"And does it?" he queried, looking dubiously at the herbal concoction
his wife was pouring into her cup.
"Not really. But it does bring back a lot of happy memories,"
Amanda answered with a soft smile. "It belonged to my maternal grandmother.
Nana died when I was ten, but I remember using this tea set when I visited
her. We had the most wonderful tea parties, just the two of us and
Lois Ann."
"Lois Ann was your doll, right?"
"Yeah," she nodded. "It's funny, the things you remember from
childhood. Last winter seems so long ago, but I remember those tea
parties like they were yesterday." As she spoke, she looked up to
meet her husband's eyes with a contemplative expression.
He cocked his head to one side, picked up one of her hands, and placed
a gentle kiss in her palm. "What?" He asked in response to
the unspoken question in her eyes.
"I just wondered what you remembered best about your grandmother,"
she said with a delicate shrug. "I know you went to live with your
uncle when you were seven, and I know - before that -
you lived with your dad's mother. But you never talk about her."
Lee's swallowed as he lowered his gaze to the floor. "She died
when I was seven. I don't remember her very clearly -
except that she was sick a lot," he said gruffly. After a short silence,
he looked back up, running one hand through his hair. "I mostly remember
that I hated hospitals. . . ."
*****************************************
Father David Kent exited the elevator and walked purposefully down the
hospital corridor toward the third floor nurses' station. He hated
hospitals - a definite liability given his calling, he thought
wryly, as he wrinkled his nose against the antiseptic smell. Pausing
for a moment to scan the area, his eyes came to rest on a small blonde
boy sitting just outside the arched doorway to the waiting room.
The boy looked decidedly out of place on the orange vinyl chair, his red
and white Keds swinging a few inches above the floor, and his eyes focused
on the black and white pattern of the tiles. As Father Kent watched,
a nurse hurried past the boy, and he looked up expectantly, but she walked
on as though the child didn't exist, too busy or too obtuse to bother with
a seven year old, even if he was the grandson of one of her patients and
a frequent visitor to her ward.
Bracing himself for his unpleasant task, Father Kent resumed his steps
toward the child. "Hello, Lee," he greeted the boy kindly.
"Mrs. Miller told me you'd be here," he continued, referring to the elderly
neighbor who usually called to advise him that Eileen Clayton was ill again,
placing her young grandson in need of temporary care and supervision.
Lee Stetson looked up as the young clergyman spoke. "Hi," he responded
sullenly to the greeting, his eyes meeting Father Kent's for the briefest
moment before returning to the floor.
Father Kent studied the blonde head silently while he weighed his next
words. However, before he could decide on an appropriate opening,
Lee suddenly looked up again.
"Did the doctor tell you how long my grandma's gonna be here this time?"
Lee questioned bluntly. "They never tell me nothin'," he complained, directing
a petulant glare at the nurses station.
Sympathy for the boy's plight overshadowed any reproach Father Kent
might normally have made for his grammar or his attitude. The child
had every right to be irritable. Since losing both parents in an
automobile accident slightly over two years ago, his life had been erratic,
living in the custody of a grandparent who was often too depressed and
too ill to provide for even his most basic needs. Indeed, it often
appeared that the child was caring for his guardian, not the other way
around. And now the boy's world was about to change again, and Father
Kent couldn't be certain the change would be for the better. "Actually,
Dr. McKeller did speak to me about your grandmother," he responded carefully
to Lee's inquiry.
The boy cocked his head to one side and waited silently. "Dr.
McKeller doesn't think your grandmother is going to get better this time,
Lee," Father Kent informed him gently.
"Oh," Lee muttered expressionlessly before returning his gaze to the
floor. After a long pause, he asked in a subdued voice "Am I gonna
come stay at the parish then? Like I usually do when she's sick?"
"No," Father Kent replied. "I was told you're going to live with
your uncle, Robert Clayton."
"Oh," Lee repeated in the same toneless manner, offering no hint of
how he felt about this obviously unexpected news.
"You know your uncle, right?" Father Kent pressed, concerned by the
child's unemotional response.
Lee fidgeted slightly, but his tone remained non-committal. "Yeah,
kinda," he mumbled.
"Kinda?"
The boy's jaw hardened slightly, but he continued to sit impassively.
"I don't 'member him much. He never comes to visit no more."
"He's in the military, and he's been out of the country for the past
few years," Father Kent explained. "I understand he was just recently
stationed on the west coast."
"That's not why he never comes," the boy growled, anger suddenly sparking
in his hazel eyes. "I heard Grandma tell Mrs. Miller they had words."
Lee's eyes narrowed and his lip curled into a slight sneer. "That
means they had a fight."
Father Kent shook his head; this was going to be even more difficult
than he had imagined. "Not really a fight, son. When grownups
have words, that just means they talked something over."
"He made my grandma cry," Lee stated harshly.
Father Kent closed his eyes, uttering a silent prayer for divine intervention.
How could he possible explain to a seven year old that his grandmother
had cried, not because of any wrongdoing on the part of his uncle, but
because of her own perceived missteps. Mrs. Clayton confided to him
almost two years ago that she had made several unintentionally hurtful
statements to her son after the untimely death of his only brother
- and she had compounded her error by avoiding the subject afterward
as their communication dwindled into uncomfortable silence. The clergyman
had been counseling her ever since to clear the air with Captain Clayton,
but he was reasonably certain the stubborn woman hadn't even told her remaining
son she was seriously ill. And now it was too late. The doctor
didn't expect her to live through the night, and - although
she had left specific instructions regarding the transfer of custody of
her grandson - she still refused to allow anyone to call her
son, asserting that she had no right to seek his comfort or forgiveness
at this late date.
Father Kent shook his head again; there was nothing he could do
about Eileen Clayton's misguided sense of justice, but at least he could
see that Lee had an opportunity to say good-bye to the woman who had acted,
however ineffectively, as surrogate parent for the past two years.
"Have you been in to see your grandmother yet?" he asked the boy.
"No," Lee grumbled scornfully, his face twisting into a grimace far
too sardonic for his tender years. "They won't let me in her room 'cause
I'm just a kid. It's against the rules."
"Well, you know what I always say?" Father Kent whispered, scanning
the temporarily deserted area. "Rules are made to be broken."
And taking the boy's hand, he moved quickly down the hallway toward room
330.
**********************************************
"We're supposed to pick the boys up at 3:30," Amanda reminded her husband
as he set a plate onto the table in front of her. "Since your uncle's
going to be early, we'll have to go into D.C. twice - unless
you want to sit at the Officer's Club for a couple of hours."
Lee looked thoughtful as he sank into the chair beside her. "It would
have been a tight squeeze in the Wagoneer, anyway," he responded with a
casual shrug. "The Colonel always travels light, but I can't believe
how much stuff Phillip and Jamie take for a night or two at Joe's apartment."
Amanda shook her head as she nibbled a corner of her toast. "I
know," she acknowledged ruefully. "You should have heard the boys
protest when their dad tried to set a one-bag rule. I thought Phillip
was going to faint when Joe told him he'd have to choose between his basketball
and his cassette player."
"Maybe we should leave the Colonel at Joe's for the week," Lee suggested
derisively. "The two of them should get along just fine -
they both live by a rule book."
Amanda rolled her eyes at her husband's mockery, but her brow wrinkled
in puzzlement as she took another bite of toast. "It's strange, though.
You told me your uncle hasn't been promoted above Colonel because he's
an innovator. That doesn't sound like someone who lives by a rule
book."
Lee picked up her free hand and caressed her fingertips with his thumb
as he considered her words. "I guess it is a little strange," he finally
agreed, staring out the kitchen window at the barren winter landscape.
"Maybe he likes to make his own rules."
Amanda shook her head. "I don't think so. At least not where
you're concerned," she assured him. "I remember him telling me, the
day you left him with me in Arlington while you were investigating those
downed fighter jets, that he wished you had come with a manual. He
said he didn't like making up rules as he went along."
Lee nodded, gently shaking her hand for emphasis but still avoiding
her eyes. "See - that's what I was talking about.
With the Colonel, everything has to be done by the book."
Amanda entwined her fingers through his while she finished her last
bite of toast and picked up her tea cup. After taking a careful sip
of the hot beverage, she glanced back at his profile. "I think
you're more like him than you realize," she stated cautiously.
Lee's brows rose in surprise as he turned toward her, clearly appalled
by the idea of any similarity between him and his uncle. "What?"
he asked incredulously.
Her eyes met his and held them. "I just mean," she began slowly,
"well, I seem to remember that you read *several* books on step-parenting
last spring, when you were trying to break the ice with Jamie." As
she paused, she arched one eyebrow delicately, as though daring him to
argue with her.
Lee looked at her thoughtfully for a moment "Yeah, I did," he
finally admitted.
After a short silence, she squeezed his hand. "I'm sure you've
done a lot better than he did," she said softly, "but maybe the circumstances
he was dealing with were a little harder, at least in the beginning."
"Yeah," he repeated, returning his gaze to the scene outside the window.
"I guess they were."
"And you had over six months to get to know Phillip and Jamie before
you moved in," Amanda reminded him. "You and the Colonel couldn't
have spent much time together in the two years after your parents died,
if he was stationed out of the country."
"And I had you to guide me through it," Lee finally added with
a deep sigh, bringing her hand to his lips. "I wonder whether the
Colonel had anyone to turn to. . . ."
*************************************
"I appreciate your watching the boy for me while I'm gone, Barn," Robert
Clayton said briskly as he straightened his sleeves and brushed an imaginary
particle of dust from the lapel of his immaculate uniform.
"It's no problem, Cap'n," Barney Dorsey replied genially. "He's
a good kid. You'd see that, if you ever spent any time with him,"
Barney continued, wishing for once the younger man would listen to someone's
advice on dealing with his orphaned nephew.
"He doesn't want to spend time with me," Clayton reminded his friend
in clipped, military accents. "He's made that clear," he added
grimly, the flicker of pain in his eyes quickly disappearing behind his
customary stoic mask.
Barney snorted and shook his head. "He made it clear when he was
seven," he argued, in another futile attempt to reason with the stubborn
officer. "He's older now. You should try. He's the only
family you have left."
Clayton's eyes narrowed as he closed his briefcase with a snap.
"I'm doing my duty by the boy," he stated gruffly, turning away from the
other man's concerned gaze.
"You could do your duty by sending him off to boarding school and visiting
him once or twice a year. You don't have to keep him with you."
Barney gripped Clayton's arm to prevent him from walking away, determined
for once to say what needed to be said. "If you didn't want him with
you, you could take the kind of assignments that would make you a general
before you're fifty. As it is, you'll be lucky not to end your career
as a Major."
"It doesn't matter," Clayton muttered, pulling his arm free and pacing
across his small office. "The boy's my priority."
Barney frowned. "You don't act like it," he stated bluntly.
"And you don't understand," Clayton mumbled almost incoherently.
Barney sighed. He understood a great deal more than Robert Clayton
gave him credit for. He had watched the changes his friend had gone
through as he lost many of his closest comrades in Korea and later as he
lost his fiance, his older brother and finally his mother. Barney
had watched as walls were slowly erected to protect the other man's wounded
heart. Walls which his young nephew couldn't begin to understand
much less breach. "The boy does have a name, you know. When
was the last time you used it?" he asked, moving on to another recurrent
gripe.
Robert Clayton ran a hand through his short, cropped hair. "It's
funny. Everybody used to call my mom 'Lee'. Now, when I look
into his eyes and open my mouth, the word just sticks in my throat.
I can't make it come out."
"He looks like both of them, doesn't he?" Barney motioned toward a small
photograph on the edge of Clayton's neatly ordered desk. The picture
showed a laughing woman hugging two small boys, the older of whom was the
image of young Lee Stetson.
"Yeah, he does. They have the same eyes, mom and Matt and . .
. " Clayton paused again and cleared his throat. "When I look
at the boy, I see both of them so clearly."
"You can't avoid him forever," Barney urged, more gently this time.
"Don't you think he at least deserves to know something about his father?
You're the only one who can tell him."
"If he ever wants to know, all he has to do is ask. . . ." For
a moment, Clayton looked into Barney Dorsey's disapproving face, then he
shrugged and turned toward the door. "I'll tell you what," he conceded.
"If he doesn't ask by the time he has a kid of his own, I'll bring it up."
Then he picked up his briefcase and hefted his bag onto his shoulder.
****************************************
"Let me take that for you, Sir," Lee Stetson offered as he reached across
his uncle to place a hand on the older man's suitcase.
Robert Clayton brushed aside his nephew's arm as he hefted the bag's
leather strap to his shoulder. "I can handle it," he stated brusquely,
straightening his aging spine with military precision.
Lee's jaw tightened for a moment before he shrugged and took a step
back. "Fine," he muttered, shoving both hands into his pockets and
exhaling loudly.
As the two men faced one another in the solemn atmosphere of the Officer's
Club, Robert Clayton studied his nephew, looking him slowly up and down
in the same manner he might have inspected a new recruit. Apparently
satisfied with what he saw, he nodded his head as his mouth relaxed into
the hint of a smile. "It looks like married life agrees with you,
Sk - ," he began, before halting abruptly and lowering his eyes.
Clearing his throat, he shifted his feet almost imperceptibly before raising
his head to meet the younger man's annoyed gaze. "It doesn't really
fit you anymore, does it?" he admitted wryly. "I don't think
you're going to skip out this time."
"Not a chance," Lee returned, his features relaxing only slightly as
he stood stiffly before the man who had reared him from the age of seven.
Their eyes remained locked as silence stretched between them.
Again, the conversational lapse was broken by the Colonel. "I spoke
to Barney Dorsey a few days ago," he stated in an offhand tone. "He
said to give his regards to you and to Amanda."
Lee blinked in surprise. "I didn't know you kept in touch with
Barney," he responded, his expression warming at the mention of his former
mentor.
It was the Colonel's turn to shrug. "I don't see him very often,
since he retired. But he still calls now and then to check up on
me."
"So, how is he?" Lee asked with genuine interest.
The Colonel snorted. "He's still a meddling old man, just like
he's always been. He called to remind me of a promise I made, a long
time ago. . . ." His words trailed off as though he had said more
than he intended.
A puzzled look crossed Lee's face, but before he could question his
uncle further, the older man changed the subject. "So, are we going
to get out of here?" he queried gruffly.
Lee hesitated. Removing his balled fists from his pockets, he
flexed his fingers several times, glancing back and forth between the outside
doors to his right and the Officer's lounge to his left. With a determined
look, he finally turned back to his uncle. "Actually, since you're
early," he suggested evenly, "I thought we'd have a drink before
we head out to Rockville." As he spoke, he motioned toward the lounge.
The older man swallowed, and his jaw worked as though he might make
some objection, but he nodded in agreement and turned in the direction
indicated. As the pair settled at a small table in the nearly deserted
bar, they were spared the necessity of further discussion by the immediate
appearance of a waiter, and both looked slightly chagrined as they simultaneously
requested coffee. As the waiter stepped away, Lee's eyes drifted
downward, and the Colonel once again took the opportunity to study his
nephew. "Something on your mind, . . . Lee?" he asked awkwardly after
a long pause.
Lee rested both arms on the table and returned his gaze to his uncle's
weathered face. "I just thought we should have some time alone together,
to talk," he answered quietly.
A flicker of amusement showed in the Colonel's eyes. "Was this your
idea, or your lovely wife's?"
"She let me think it was my idea," Lee admitted with a rueful grin.
"Smart woman," the older man observed in a low, admiring voice.
"Yeah," Lee murmured, as he appeared to lose himself in a pleasant
daydream. "The best. . . ," he added, appearing for a moment
to forget the man on the opposite side of the table.
The Colonel waited "So, was there something particular you
wanted to talk about?" he finally prompted, a wary look appearing on his
normally staid features.
"Yeah," Lee repeated , once again meeting his uncle's eyes. "I
thought maybe we'd talk about . . . my dad."
"Your dad," Robert echoed softly. Clearing his throat again,
he nodded as he reached inside his breast pocket to remove a slim leather
case. Easing it open, he ran a finger lightly over the battered snapshot
before placing it carefully on the table. It showed a laughing woman
hugging two small boys, one of whom was a younger version of the man seated
across from him. "Did I ever tell you about the time your dad and
I got locked in your great-grandmother's root cellar?" he began slowly,
without raising his suddenly misty eyes from the picture. "I
was about eight at the time, and your dad and I were pretending we were
escaped POWs. . . ."
The End
