I watch silently as they fold the flag from his casket and hand it to his mother. I stare straight ahead and try to ignore her sobs and the prickly feeling in the back of my eyes.

I hear shots being fired, but I try to ignore them as well. Instead, i think back to all the times we've spent together. From the first day we met, to that day. The day he died. If i could change places with him that day, I would. If i could at least changed my actions that day, I would. Why did I have to yell at him? Why did I have to say I was gonna kill him? Why didn't I tell him??

I realize now everyone is gone. It's just me, the sickly sweet smell of flowers and fresh cut grass, dozens of chairs, and a casket. The casket. His casket.

I stare at it for a few moments. I blink my eyes a few times to make sure I'm not dreaming. To make sure this really is his casket. To make sure he really is dead.

I wasn't dreaming. This is his casket. He really is dead.

I rub my fingers gently and slowly over the dark wood. It hurts. I miss him so much. I wish i can see him just one more time. To hear his voice once more. To tell him I love him. To say goodbye.

Why does he have to be dead?

I hear foot steps approach me. They come closer until I can practically feel the person behind me. For a second, I think it's him. He would stand behind me like that all the time. I would know it was him, from the heat of his body, the way he would say absolutely nothing, but i could tell everything he was thinking, and by his smell. I always loved the smell of his cologne. Or maybe that was just the way he smelt.

I almost turn around to see if it really is him. But then I realize where I am, and whats in front of me. I stare at his coffin, still feeling the presence of someone behind me. I hear more leaves crunching behind me, but the person behind me hasn't moved, so I know someone else is now here. I don't turn around. Just close my eyes and hope that they will just leave me alone.

"Calliegh?" The voice spoke soft and quietly, but I don't need to see his face to know who it is. I wipe me numb face free from any tears that might be there, and slowly turned around. "Hi, Horatio." I reply slowly. I try to fake a smile, but it doesn't fool Horatio, or Eric, whose standing right next to him.

"How are you doing, Cal?" Eric asks softly. His voice is soft and comforting. I don't want to hear it right now. It just reminds me of him. He always spoke to me that way, whenever he sensed something was wrong. I don't want to be reminded.

I ignore him and his question. I stare down at my hands. I notice how the sun reflects perfectly off my diamond ring.

My engagement ring.

A tear rolls down my cheek as I remember the night he proposed.

It was perfect. We went to my favorite fancy restaurant. After the waiter brought our food, we had a quiet candle light dinner with peaceful conversation. I asked him what the occasion was. He told me he wanted to celebrate. I asked what we were celebrating.

He locked my hands in his and got down on one knee. "Calliegh." He started, nervously. "I love you so much, I can't spend the rest of my life without you. You mean so much to me." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a diamond ring. "Will you marry me?" My eyes quickly filled with tears as I whispered my answer. "Yes, yes I will." "Really?" He asked, making sure he was hearing right. "Yes, really." He stands quickly and pulls me into his arms. People around us clap and congratulate us, but nither of us really pay attention to anything other than each other. "I love you Calliegh." He whispered in my ear. "I love you too, Tim."

I fidget with my ring for a moment. Several more tears begin pouring down my face. I try to blink them away, but they keep coming down. I try to wipe them away, but it just smears them across my face. I look up to Eric and Horatio, and then just let the tears pour down my face freely. After a moment, I begin sobbing loudly. Eric pulls me into his arms and I cry into his shoulder. I don't try to stop, just let it all out.

"It's not fair." I whisper. "I know it's not." Eric replies. He puts his hand on my back and starts rubbing it soothingly. My body starts raking from the sobbing. Eric guides me to a chair. Horatio and Eric sit on either side of me. "It's gonna be okay Calliegh." Horatio tries to comfort. "No it's not." I cry. "I never got to say good bye. I never even told him."

"Told him what?" Horatio asks. I stare at my feet and try to ignore him. I hope he just forgets what I just said and leaves me alone. A second later, I realize, neither of them are gonna forget. "Calliegh, you can trust us." Eric says.

I stare straight into his eyes and don't speak until I'm sure I can trust him. "I'm pregnant." I say slowly. "Oh gosh." Eric sighs, his hand immediately running through his dark curls. "Are you positive?" Horatio asks. I nod. "How far are you?" Eric asks. "Right at seven weeks." I reply. Horatio sighs. "And the baby is-" "Tims'?" I ask. I nod again. "We were engaged."

Tears fall down my face again. Eric pulls me back into his arms. "Tim never knew?" Eric asks softly. I shake my head. "I was trying to find the best way to tell him, but then..." My voices trails off and I wipe at my tears. "I'm scared Eric. Tim and I talked about having a baby, but now Tim is gone. I want to have this baby, I love it so much already, but I just can't do this alone, I just can't. I can't do it."

"Shhh, Cal, it's okay. You don't have to do too. Were all gonna be right by you side to help you through this." Eric promises. "All of us."

TBC...