A/N: New fanfic! It's Jalex this time with tons of references of Jemily in the past. Emilex, the endgame ship in Matchmakers, was really fun to write but I'm switching back to Jalex since a lot of Alex fans enjoy them together. The rating of this story may shift due to the angst, so for future chapters, sorry.

Characters and references from Criminal Minds do not belong to me.

—o—

Dear Emily,

Besides this letter that you are reading at the moment, my resignation form lies ahead. Now, you might be thinking how much frustration and annoyance that you're feeling because I'm making this rash decision, but I've added so much consideration to this. And Spencer and Garcia, yes, I've thought about them too.

I'm leaving. Yes, I am. I'm not going to sugarcoat it because I want this. Really, really badly do I. I know that this team has already faced so many losses for the past year, but I cannot bear anymore of this. Torture, perhaps. I'm at a war with myself, a war I cannot fight when I'm constantly around the environment that the opposing side takes advantage of.

I have no idea when I'll be back. Hell, I don't even know if I'm ever going back. I'm too out of it to focus.

Henry and Michael are in the care of Will now. The team will eventually know that we have been divorced. Might as well give them the letter to drop the big bomb. He won't know where I am, and I won't know where I'll go till I find it. Somewhere comfortable.

I have hope that I will. That's the only thing that I can depend on right now, even though it has bitten my ass many times for over the decade.

Tell Spencer that it isn't his fault that I left. It's my choice—if anything, he should take it all out on me. Just tell him that.

Garcia is going to compulsively quit the job. Don't let that happen to her. She needs everyone more than ever before. And everyone is going to need her more than ever. Also, don't let her track me down. She's going to receive dead ends everytime.

Emily, please keep the team active as ever. They shouldn't be distracted on the job and in their personal lives. Tell them that I'm fine. I'll be okay.

I love you. Always. I'm so happy for you. Don't let her slip away from your life like I did with you. Don't do the same mistake that drove us apart.

Don't become me.

With my heart rested upon you,

Jennifer