January 4, 2013

Ezra,
I don't think you understand how much I miss you. Everything about you. How much you would smell like coffee and Scotch at the same time, but in a good way. Or how your eyebrows knitted together in that cute way when you were writing something difficult. And now I'm left smelling all the shirts and sweaters I kept. And a few boxers, but I don't smell those, just wear them to bed. Promise.

Remember that one time when we took our first picture as a couple in your apartment? I think, deep down, I wanted to hurt you like you thought. Only because I was still pretty upset over the Jackie thing. Don't worry though, I've moved on from that. I think the whole Maggie/Malcolm thing helped too. I don't think I'll ever get over that one. At lest not now. But, I promise you I will. Maybe when I decide you've given me enough kisses or let me keep that red shirt I love so much. Yes, I can be bought with simple things like that. But don't use this information to your advantage. Or else, I will hurt you. And that's a pinky promise.

Today, Spencer was telling me how she would drive me to NY to visit you. Something about "wanting to see more of Fitz and the other half of Sparia." Her words, not mine. You wouldn't mind that, would you? We could walk around and hold hands together. Hell, we can do something stupid like get me a fake I.D. and go to a bar and get drunk off our asses. I'd like to see you drunk again. Just for the small purpose of using anything embarrassing you do against you later on in life. Maybe even use it to teach our kids about not over drinking. Or drinking at all to be exact.

Well, I guess I should go now, right? I wanna get this out to you soon. And I had an amazing time with you and Hardy on New Years. Definitely not something I'll forget. What was it you said to me? Oh yeah, "I wanna dance with no pants on just for you, Ar!" Ha! That'll be number one on why our kids don't get to drink. I don't want them dancing with my pants on for their friends or loved-ones. That'll be weird and make me want to keep them in a bubble for the rest of their life.

With love,

Ar. xoxo

P.S. Don't forget to check your pants ;)

o.O.o

Aria set the letter down on her desk. Her pen following it's lead. Living in the same town as Ezra and not being able to see him was better than him living in New York and being farther away from him. What if something happened to him? Would someone call her? Would she be able to drive down there at 3 am? Would he want her down there if something were to happen to him? Would he come back to Rosewood if something happened to her?

These are the kind of questions she asked herself daily since he moved to New York. She should be happy for him though. He got a good job at a private boys school, and he still had time to write. But she was scared. To say the lest. She didn't want to think of such things, but having a nonstop imagination did have it's downsides.

She smoothed her palms against her jeans and fixed the shirt she was wearing as she stood up. His shirt to be exact. When she told him she was keeping some of his stuff, he thought it'd be a few things, but it was more like a box and a half. Nothing but shirts, sweatshirts, a coffee mug or two, and two pairs of clean boxers. She knew he'd be back, he told her. Plus he was still renting his apartment so she can go over there if things with Byron got to intense. Which, to both their surprises, wasn't as often as before. But something in her told her it was because Ezra was in a different State now.

"Can I come in?" Speak of the devil. Byron's head peaked into her room. No point in asking if your already half ways though.

"Sure. What's up?" She closed up her writing stuff, setting it aside to keep him from reading anything. Not that it mattered if he did read it, nothing bad was written down for him to get mad over. But keeping her writings away from anyone but Ezra was a habit. And it was a habit she planned on keeping.

"I was about to order dinner and wanted to know if you're staying home tonight... Mike's home too and I'm sure he'd really like that." Byron stood a few feet away from her. His eyes taking in the shirt she was wearing. He knew she would do something to keep Ezra with her, but wearing his shirts everyday was going a bit overboard. At lest, in his eyes it was.

"Um, sure. I'll be down in a sec." She busied herself by fixing her bed. Trying to keep from making complete eye contact with Byron. No matter how much time passed, her relationship with her father will always be strained. As much as she hated to admit it. It was true.

"Oh." His voice full of surprise, not even bothering to hide it. "Okay. Well, try to hurry. Mike is getting impatient." Byron walked towards the door, stopping under the door frame. "And, Aria"

"Yeah dad?"

"I miss you. Our relationship. You know, how things used to be. Before... everything." By the tone in his voice Aria could tell he meant it. And she was glad he realized how much has changed, but that wasn't going to just jump in his arms and act like she was five again. Trust was earned, and he was no exception.

Aria bit down on her bottom lip. Not sure how to respond to him. "Don't respond, Aria. I know it was out of nowhere. I just wanted to let you know." Byron's voice snapping her out of her thoughts.

"Okay, dad. Uh, I'm just gonna wash my hands and I'll be down there soon." Aria's lips forming a small smile as he nodded and walked out. Tonight was going to be interesting.

To Aria's surprise, dinner with Mike and Byron wasn't as awkward as she thought. In fact, it was quite normal. Well, as normal as it can be without Ella next to her. Byron talked about his classes at Hollis. Mike about his lacrosse game that was coming up next weekend. Aria was surprised, to say the lest, when Byron even brought up Ezra and how he was doing.

"He's good. His students are easier to handle since they're not so rowdy. He might come down next weekend for Mike's game." Aria thought back to her response. After Mike hit Ezra a few months back, she figured Ezra would still harbor some bad feelings towards her brother. But when he said he wanted to get to know Mike as more of a "Possible brother-in-law" way, she couldn't contain her happiness. And after she, Ezra, and Mike had coffee and they couldn't stop joking around, she couldn't wait to let them get to know each other more. Sure most of the jokes were at her expense, but they still got along and things were normal for them all. No awkward stares, starters, or confusing tension. It was all normal and relaxing.

Aria slipped on a pair of Ezra's boxers under one of his old college shirts. Making sure to plug her phone into the charger. She figured Ezra was fast a sleep so she sent him a simple goodnight text before climbing into bed. Only to have to move again to get her phone when it started ringing.

"Hello?" Aria's voice coming out as a whisper as she held the phone to her ear.

"Did I wake you? I figured you'd be up so I didn't text back." Ezra's voice came out raspy. Meaning he was either half a sleep or he was having his own little alone time.

"Nope. Just made me move from my bed. What were you doing? Actually, don't answer, I don't think I wanna know." She ran her fingers though her hair. Trying to get comfortable on her bed again.

"Ha-ha. Stop being such a pervert, Pookie. Your text woke me up. I guess that's my fault for leaving the phone on my pillow." Ezra moved his hand to rest his head on. Trying to keep from falling a sleep again.

"You said you wouldn't call me that!" Aria stifled a small laugh that was waiting to happen. "Well, I just wanted to say goodnight and I'm sending the letter tomorrow morning." Her hand coming up to hold back a yawn.

"I know. But you started it, so that gives me the right. Okay, well goodnight. And don't forget to send it. Last time was torture waiting for it." Aria could hear Ezra yawn from the other end. memories of how his eyes would get watery right after flooded her thoughts.

"Okay whatever. Goodnight, babe." Aria pulled the covers over her body, trying to get warm again.

"Goodnight, my pookie bear. I'll see you soon." After sharing a few I love yous they both ended the call, leaving Aria feeling alone in her room as she let sleep overcome her for the night.