I

"It's going to be different and you're going to have the best summer ever, honey."

Mom always spoke in absolutes like that and when she did, it sounded like a proclamation, like it would come true because she said so. The thing is, not always Karma was on her side.

She was only partially right though. The summer I graduated from high school with a scholar ship for Gotham Medical School, everything began to change, just like a subtle twist in a long ass story—I called my life. It was definitely different though not in a good way or even bad for that matter. It was just… bizarre.

Every time I think about it or try to remember exactly what happened to me that summer, it always comes to me in a haze, then my head starts to hurt so I'd eventually stop thinking about it. It seems as if that summer nothing about the ordinary 'Art Café' and the same people I interacted with in there was usual. It looked like one of those dreams when you are in a very familiar place and everything is in its place but you're not hundred percent sure only because something, someone has caused the whole place to feel different.

'Art Café' was the only place in the whole city that I felt I had a connection with. I was free to sit on a wooden stool in a dim-light corner there for 6 hours straight in a day only to read books, write something or even draw without any distraction. Of course the only time I was only allowed to go there was in the summer but to be honest that place was my only motivation throughout the entire school year to work hard and to get good grades, trying to keep my dad happy and assuring him that I still haven't given up on my ultimate goal in life—which was to be a physician just like him.

Therefore I had to keep my mouth shut and do whatever I was told. But it was worth it when I thought about my little paradise down the Almond street by the bridge, where I could regain control over my own mind, where I could be me.

Different people came and went, mostly hippies and antisocial weirdos like me but it was comfortable nonetheless and I even had managed to make some trustworthy friends over the years going in there.

Well to be precise only one actually. Harry. But you get what I mean.

It was early in the summer— I don't really remember if it was June or July though, all I know is that even though it was only 8 in the evening, still it was hellishly hot out there and I had to order lemonade every ten minutes to keep myself cool and hydrated. I was sitting in a booth right next to the tall windows that exposed a beautiful view of the glowing bridge with arches going up into the dusky sky as the dark river flowed beneath it.

There weren't many people in the café, only a few guys leaning on the bar, talking and smoking while Johnny Cash was playing in the back ground. Harry was sitting opposite of me, burying his dark head in his laptop as per usual when I suddenly stood up and placed one of my sketches right on his laptop's screen. He stopped typing right away and after a moment popped his head with a raised brow, his dark skin getting much darker in the shadows. A look of curiousness spread all over his face.

"Well," I smiled at him proudly, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning back against my seat. "What do you think?"

He held up the ragged-edged piece of paper, leaning forward intently and titling his head as he stared at the picture in the middle of the paper. The way he narrowed his eyes, puffed his cheeks and pressed his lips almost comically, I already knew what he was going to say. And that made me frown. Then his gaze flickered to me again and then to the paper, to me and the paper as he finally blew loudly and offered me a crooked smile.

"It's uh… hmm…" He tilted his head, pretending to be deep in thought before widening his eyes, "It's um… a circular pot."

I shook my head disapprovingly and he pouted his lips like a child he was, "That's the only thing you see?"

"And this weird ass tree?" He grinned playfully and I found the corner of my mouth twitching, despite my morose state of mind. Harry wasn't stupid, he just loved to joke about everything and he didn't fail to make me laugh most of the time either but I really needed to know if I had progressed in sketching or not so I pulled the paper out of his grip and pointed at the picture teasingly.

"It's not a tree Harry, can't you really see?" I sighed frustrated, " It's a man, these are his hands and strands of his hair pulled up which makes it to look like branches."

His mouth quirked and he raised both eyebrows in surprise, " Oh. " He said slyly, "But why's he sitting on a pot anyway?" He rested his chin in his hand, laughing. "And what is this cloudy thing over his head?"

I averted my eyes back to picture, " Thoughts mostly, " staring at the picture I said, " And his surroundings, obviously." I said sulkily this time, rolling my eyes at him.

Harry started laughing then, cocking his head slightly as he winked and simultaneously tapped me on my left shoulder. "C'mon girl, I'm kidding." To say that I wasn't hurt was an understatement. But thinking about it now I never have found his attitude towards things to be mean. He was just being his funny self; it was me brooding over nothing as always. "But seriously can't you draw something simpler for my simple mind?" he drew back his hand, still smiling.

I couldn't stop frowning. I admit I've never been a real artist but for someone who never took any art classes period, I was pretty okay in my own opinion. Besides I always had a thing for surrealism artist, René Magritte. Sure I wasn't going to become anything close to him but I could at least try a little follow his style. People like Magritte, they weren't ordinary humans; they had this natural eye for their surroundings. They saw things, others were blind to.

I didn't wait for Harry to once again start with his supposed to be funny comments that evening, I felt sorta offended and so I was livid. Folding the paper, I threw it in my back pack carelessly and started for the exit. Harry must have been shocked, because just right then he threw himself on the table, almost immediately and grabbed me by my wrist before I could go.

"Hey Ellie where're you going? I was joki—" I could sense this mixture of playfulness and sincerity in his voice.

"Whatever." I only shrugged, pulling back my hand but he stood and blocked my way anyway. He was only a few inches taller than me, which doesn't say much since I'm about 5' 4'' on a good day. "At least let me walk you home."

"I can walk home just fine on my own." I retorted, trying to push him out of the way again. I somehow knew I was just being a bitch at the moment but what do you know, I've been always famous for my sensitivity among teachers and classmates. People never really dared to share their honest opinion with me in fear of me over-reacting like this, which only resulted in most of them to be passive aggressive to me or just back away, simply stop being around me. But Harry definitely wasn't one of those people.

"Well I need some fresh air too." He said quickly, grabbing his laptop, flipped it close and put it in his bag, almost running after me to the door as he held the door open and smiled sweetly at me, "Ladies first". I didn't glance at him when the door opened and the humid warm summer air slapped me in the face as soon. I felt like gagging but sucked in some oxygen instead and coughed it back out.

Harry eyed me worriedly and grabbed my right shoulder. "You're alright?" he asked which I only responded by nodding, sometimes it just made me sick how he cared about me so much, specially when I became nothing more than mean to him. But we all wear masks sometimes, so I'd just tried and played nice, only because he deserved it. Our walk started in silence with slow strides back to the heart of the city, away from fogginess of the bridge.

I always loved walking along the river. It was less polluted there, quiet, plain beautiful and more refreshing. It kinda reminded me of country side; when we used to go to grandma's. But as she passed away when I was only ten we stopped going there and dad sold the farmhouse. He promised me to take me to the river sometimes and buy me ice cream. This was one of the rarest things he'd do for me and it always made him happy. Though as I grew up, he'd become busier and Gotham became scarier. Or maybe it was from the beginning and I didn't understand but the more I learned the more I was restricted by my parents.

I was never allowed to go to the river by myself. Only because it was close to the bridge and the bridge was a connection between main city streets and the Narrows, where most crimes took place.

Of course I never told them about where Art Café was exactly located still though somewhere at the back of my head I always knew, I should avoid there. Dad always said it's only a matter of time before the chaos invading the Narrows infect our part of the city as well. It was unnerving to think about but there was probably nothing we could do.

Harry never was a person who would look for trouble. Some rules he didn't really like but he respected them anyway. So even though that night I wasn't alone we didn't take the path along the river. We directly went into the busy streets where it wasn't as dead.

Soon the darkness set in as we entered the busy street, we watched the line of cars crossing a little faster, huge lamps lit the whole area. The line for people on foot or on bicycles dwindle down slowly and then stopped. A few border patrol people left their stations and drove away. I continued our silent conversation, even Harry was defeated or at least looked like it. The only sound echoed around us was the squealing of tires and people yelling and cars honking and it all made me dizzier. I felt like vomiting and didn't want anything more than getting home and the comfort of my bed.

By the time we got home my feet were so sore I didn't bother to stand on them anymore, I simply walked to the porch and sat on the stairs. Harry stopped a few feet away, hands tugged in his pocket and head's down. I let out a sigh and looked tiredly at home, I didn't know why I felt so down but my anger sure had faded away.I smiled and forced myself to my feet again. "Thanks for walking with me."

He half-smiled and slowly raised his hand to scratch the back of his head sheepishly, "No problem." He replied but as I was ready to go back inside, he called, "Um Ellie, I hope you're not mad at me, anymore."

Walking always soothed me, didn't matter if my feet felt like they were on fire, I walked to him and punched him playfully on the shoulder. "Of course I am silly." I teased, hoping to lighten up the mood a little.

Harry only laughed it away. The tension no longer hanging over us. "Listen," He then proceeded, drawing my attention. " I didn't get to tell you sooner but I'm flying to London tomorrow."

That took me off guard. The summer had just began and he was already planning to go on a vacation. I don't know why but suddenly my heart started to beat faster at thought of his absence.

"What?" I stuttered, " I mean for how long?"

"Well I'd be gone only for only a few weeks, " He shrugged," Max sent an invitation."

I should've figured. "Oh him again?" Jealousy clouded my tone as I bit down my tongue.

Last summer this British guy named Max and Harry met at Art Café. They somehow ended up being really close friends after only a few weeks which made me more than a little furious since Harry had always been my best friend. My only friend. Soon I learned more about their relationship. I felt a little bitter inside for losing him but all the while I was happy for him. I respected his decision. Besides why couldn't he be both a good friend to me and a lover to Max? So I tried to let it slip, that was until Max was gone back to his country and although I felt sorry for Harry, I couldn't hide the jolliness inside my stomach. I was more than happy to have Harry all to myself again. Of course Harry never really talked about him ever again, so I naturally thought they'd broken up or something and it was over until now.

It seemed like I was wrong.

"It's for this music festival," Harry continued, luckily unaware of my tensed body. I could see how hard he tried to keep his face straight but it was impossible to ignore the excitement in his eyes., " I mean I could ask him to buy you a ticket too but he just called this morning and—"

"Hey," I squeezed his arm, interrupting him. " Don't worry about it, I'm happy for you. Really, " I shook my head and forced a smile, " I really am."

"Thanks," He said. It was ridiculous how lonely I felt that moment. One because Harry kept it from me all along and two because he was going to go away even if for a while. He was the only one I hung around with. He deserved it of course but what about me? what was I supposed to do while he was gone? Suddenly I had this strong urge of crying but I bit down my bottom lip to hold back the tears.

"Ellie, " His friendly voice echoed in my head, as I blinked away the fresh tears in my eyes. " I think it's time for you too,"I raised a brow in shock, pretending not to know what he was talking, "Find someone. Be happy."

"Well I am happy." I shrugged indifferently.

"C'mon, I know you're fine on you own. But—" He shook his head from side to side," how would you know if you never try? I mean have you looked at yourself in the mirror? You're gorgeous, cute, smart, talented." I pulled a face at that. I'd always been a little self-conscious about both my looks and abilities and now I thought Harry was just exaggerating. "I'm serious. Guys and gals out there would die to be with someone like you. You've been studying your whole teenage life. Now I know you can't go back to high school and fix all that but now's your chance. Put yourself out there, just show the world how awesome you really are."

Silence followed by his long speech wasn't something to avoid. I hated to admit but he was right. I'd always been the quiet nerdy type, whereas inside there had been always a storm going on in me. But what if I never wanted to change things. I only enjoyed my peaceful summer nights with him, arguing and bantering. I enjoyed sitting silently across him, writing stories and sketching and taking small sips of my cool lemonade. Now not only he was leaving but also he asked me to make things different? Only thinking about it made me uncomfortable.

"Fine Harry." Somehow though I didn't find the strength in me to argue about it. Besides I didn't want his last memory of me before traveling would be me being a distasteful jealous sounding bitch." Don't worry about it. You try to have lots of fun with Max there, alright?"

"Promise me when I get back from London you have either a boyfriend or a girl friend."

I wrinkled my nose at that. "How about I promise you I won't be a virgin till then, huh?" I winked at him in a flirtatious manner which made him burst into laughing.

"That's my girl. You know I love you." He said, pulling me into a tight embrace.

As I patted his back, trying to coat my trembling voice by sounding high-pitched and cheeky, I said. "Yeah I know."

"Well, " He drew back, looking in my eyes and I think he saw how depressed I already was only by looking at me," See you soon then."

"Take care, see you."

Then he walked away and I felt my heart pacing up in my ribcage and my face suddenly getting too hot while my hands were freezing and I couldn't breathe. I thought about how all the other 80 day something day of the summer would go without him. I hated waking up next morning, thinking of going to my special place without getting to see my only friend, around. But I didn't have a saying in that now did I? A few seconds standing there, I had no other choice but to turn around and go inside.

The next morning I decided not to go to Art Café first thing in the morning. I even didn't go to the airport. Henry said it wasn't a big deal and it wasn't like he wouldn't come back in a few weeks anyway. So we said goodbye over the phone for the second time and then I demanded him to bring me something from London. I didn't care what it was. I just wanted to make sure he wasn't going to forget about me back at home.

I actually slept late that morning, which was a bizarre thing for me to do, since I'm normally a morning person. When I woke up, I spent five hours watching America's Next Top Model and ate all the junk foods I could find. Around 4 in the afternoon, I knew I couldn't pretend to be a sack of potatoes anymore so even though it was practically blazing hot outside, I grabbed my back pack and started for my comfort zone.

I tried not to think about Harry all the way there and even when I got there, as I entered and the cool fresh air inside made me feel like I'd just entered heaven I tried not to ponder over his absence. It was relatively empty at 4:30 as I chose a comfortable spot near the bar, sat on a stool and ordered a lemonade but as I was about to pull out my notebook a folded paper in my bag slipped on the ground.

Picking it up, I stared at it for a moment, remembering our bantering with Harry. I looked at the circular cracked pot as Harry put it and the human form sitting on the edges. His hands were too long to be humanly, along with them his strands of hair was connected to a dark cloud that surrounded him. I wondered if it was that hard to understand what the picture really meant but then maybe it really was nothing more than a meaningless doodle. I sighed unknowingly at the though and then placed it on the table before going back to my notebook opening it up my to a fresh page and starting with a new idea in my head. Radiohead's Creep was playing on the jukebox as I drew curved lines on the paper, ascended and descended the tip of my pencil with every beat of the song. Sipping from my lemonade and getting lost in a world that wasn't neither imaginary nor real.

Whatever makes you happy.

Whatever you want

You're so fuckin' special

I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo

What the hell am I doing here?

I don't belong here

I don't belong here.

"Your surroundings keep you from evolving, huh?" My thoughts were soon torn apart by the deep voice coming from somewhere at the back of my head. I turned to look at whoever was speaking when the stool next to me was dragged harshly on the ground and a tall man sat on it casually. All I could see was how broad his shoulders were in that black T-shirt he was wearing and how his long dirty blond hair had covered his face. For a moment I thought my mind had only been tricking me and what I heard was only in my head, not even real so I turned my attention back to the notebook. " But what if we turn it upside down? hmm? Then it simply looks like a smiling clown."

The same voice echoed in my ears and my eyes shot up as the man beside me turned and I finally saw how handsome he actually looked with dark brown eyes and sharp cheekbones. As he threw me the hugest grin possible on a human face, I couldn't help but to feel a little uneasy at the bottom of my stomach especially when I noticed how he'd gripped the edges of the paper with my sketch from yesterday on it. There was something...something off about him. Something I couldn't exactly put my finger on it.

Little did I know that day this stranger showing up at the Art Cafe and Creep playing on the Jukebox at the same time wasn't only a sick coincidence, either.

To be continued...

A/N: I'm alive and I'm back with something new.

Hope you enjoyed.

Cheers,

Bella