Scorpius let out a dejected sigh as he looked down at the less-than-loving owl he had received from Albus Potter.
"Oh Merlin," Iris Zabini groaned from where she was lounging under the Grecian sun. "What did Potter say this time?"
Scowling at his friend, Scorpius refused to answer her question. Instead, he folded up Potter's letter and set it on his lounge chair before diving straight into the water of his family's pool.
The Malfoys didn't always go to their summer home in Greece when Scorpius was out of school, but it was certainly one of his favorite vacation spots. Much better than France or Italy, where Scorpius was dragged from shop to shop by his mother. Scorpius loved shopping and fashion, but Astoria Malfoy was a force to be reckoned with whenever they visited Paris or Milan.
As he lazily swam laps across the pool, Scorpius pondered his hopeless crush on Albus Potter. The interest had begun almost instantly when Scorpius had seen the other boy on Platform 9 ¾ their first year. Over time, that interest had grown into infatuation, and Scorpius didn't even try to keep it a secret from Potter or the rest of the school. He first asked Potter out to a Hogsmeade weekend in third year, and the boy had accepted much to Scorpius' delight. The date had been going splendidly until Scorpius tried to kiss him. That had earned him a punch to the mouth and a loud exclamation of "what the bloody hell!?" before Potter had taken off and run full tilt back up to Hogwarts like a herd of centaurs were on his heels.
Scorpius let out another dramatic sigh as he finished his swim and pulled himself out of the pool.
"Wow, he doesn't mince words does he?" Iris commented from where she was seated on Scorpius' lounge chair, her eyes hungrily reading over the admittedly short letter Scorpius had received in reply to the last owl he had sent to Potter.
"At least he's consistent," Scorpius grumbled as he slumped down next to her, not even bothering to towel off. The heat of the day would do that for him.
"'Malfoy,'" Iris read in an uncanny impression of Potter's voice, "'How many times do I have to tell you to stop owling me and leave me the hell alone, you ponce! Signed Albus Potter.'"
"You don't have to rub it in," Scorpius said, narrowing his eyes at her.
"I assume the owl that prompted this response was yet another one of your elaborate declarations of undying love?"
Scorpius' gaze dropped to his feet. "More or less," he mumbled. He just didn't understand it. His father had always drilled it into him that he should never pursue anything less than what he wanted. Draco Malfoy had spent many a night regaling his son with stories from the War; of lost chances and poor choices made despite countless misgivings. Scorpius often got the sense that there was a lot more than just being a Death Eater that his father regretted from the time of the War.
"I think you've gone about this all wrong, my love," Iris said, leaning over to rest her head on his shoulder.
"How do you mean?" he asked as he lifted a hand to gently tug on a strand of her hair.
"Well you've been all over the kid since third year. And that obviously hasn't worked in your favor. Desperation does not suit you, darling." Scorpius opened his mouth to retort but Iris cut him off with a sharp hush! "We're about to start our seventh year. This is your last chance to get anything resembling a shot with Albus Potter before he's unleashed on the rest of the Wizarding World." Scorpius grimaced at that. Potter hadn't done much dating during his years at Hogwarts and Scorpius was grateful. He didn't want to get detention for setting some poor girl's hair on fire. Because despite Potter's insistence that he is "not bent in the least bit, damn you!" Scorpius' gaydar is infallible, thank you very much, and Albus Potter was a textbook closet case if he'd ever seen one.
"Father always says that honesty and persistence are the best tools you can have when it comes to matters of the heart." Those had been some weird conversations, because considering the fact that Scorpius' father had given him endless love advice, Draco and Astoria Malfoy's marriage was obviously just for show. Well, that and an heir of course. They got along fine, but rarely if ever engaged in any kind of physical affection.
"Scorpius, no offense, but sometimes your father seems like he might be a few twigs short of a broom. I wouldn't be taking love advice from him." Iris patted his back consolingly. Scorpius let out an incredulous scoff.
"You're kidding right? This coming from the girl who has spent two years silently and creepily crushing on—"
"Irrelevant!" Iris yelled over him. Scorpius can't hold back a small smirk. "Getting back to my point, you can't keep chasing after Potter like this. It's not going to get you anywhere."
"What, I should start watching him from hidden corners and bribing house elves to steal his jumpers?" Scorpius gave her a pointed look and Iris' face turned a bright shade of red.
"That's—you can't—th-this isn't about me, you git!"
Scorpius shrugged, dropping the subject. Iris was very sensitive about her own infatuation, and much less willing to talk about it than Scorpius was willing to talk about Potter.
"What's your suggestion?" he asked, steering her back to safer territory. Her face brightened immediately.
"Ignore him!" she said excitedly. Scorpius stared at her.
"Brilliant plan, Zabini," he deadpanned.
"No I'm serious! At this point he's so used to you shamelessly throwing yourself at him like a three-knut whore—"
"Thanks ever so much."
"—that he won't be able to help but notice if you just start ignoring him."
Scorpius was skeptical. "So, what? I just ignore him for all of seventh year and hope he misses my attention enough to come after me?"
"Not quite. There is a second part to this plan." There was a particular gleam in her eyes that made Scorpius simultaneously nervous and curious.
"Alright, I'll bite. What is the second part?"
"You go after someone else."
Scorpius quirked an eyebrow at her. "That's your genius plan? Ignore Potter and date someone else?"
"You're going to make him jealous, you beautiful idiot."
Scorpius thought it over. It wasn't the worst plan Iris had ever had, but then again she'd had some pretty ridiculous schemes over the almost ten years that Scorpius has known her.
"This is all working off of the assumption that Albus Potter actually is gay," he said slowly, pensively.
"You're the one who's always going on about how he's so far in the closet that he's set up camp in there."
She was right. But now Scorpius had to reevaluate how much of that was actual gaydar and how much of it was simply wishful thinking. He wasn't feeling so confident now.
"Hey, even if it doesn't work, at least you'll be getting some action this year, eh?" Iris grinned widely, wiggling her eyebrows. Scorpius laughed. She could always make him laugh.
"Alright," he finally agreed, still chuckling. "What have I got to lose?"