ONE SHOT NUMBER ONE
A DISMAL DISCOVERY
'The minute you let her under your skin,
Then you begin to make it better…'
Hey, Jude-The Beatles
Tonks entered Number Twelve Grimmauld place and scrubbed her boots on the inside doormat, freeing them of all the muck she had collected after her solo stakeout at Dolohov's hideout. It had been raining and her baggy coat was saturated with water. She instantly warmed as she slipped it off and hung it on the unstable coat-stand.
"Tonks, dear, you're a mess," Molly Weasley remarked glumly, exiting the kitchen.
Molly strolled down the hall bringing the scent of a warm meal she was preparing with her. Tonks shrugged with a wry smile and removed her wand from the back of her skin tight jeans. She tapped her shoulder with it and her body was instantly relieved of all excess water. Molly offered a warm smile and pulled Tonks into her embrace.
"Wotcher, Molly," smiled Tonks.
"You should have taken an umbrella, Tonks. Or charmed yourself to stay dry," Molly scolded holding her at arm's length.
Tonks laughed quietly. She loved Molly Weasley. Always so caring and concerned with everyone around her. Kindhearted and loving, Molly considered everybody family and went to all lengths necessary to make sure they always felt at home. Before she had arrived at Grimmauld Place, it had been dark, dank and solemn. Two weeks after her arrival, the house had attained a more maternal feel. It always smelled of either cinnamon or freshly prepared food. She had managed to decorate it for every holiday that was oncoming and when it wasn't festive, it was cleaned to perfection-no thanks to Kreature whose main focus was his late 'Mistress's' room. Needless to say, Molly's presence in the Noble House of Black was much needed and helped to maintain a certain amount of sanity that could only be acquired through a Mother's Touch.
"Come now, let's get you a cup of tea. I just put on a kettle."
"Erm, I should really join the meeting. I'm already late," Tonks grimaced pointing down the hall at the dining room where the Order was currently having a discussion.
"Oh, Tonks there will be plenty of time for meetings later," scoffed Molly, with a dismissive wave.
Tonks followed Molly down the hallway, carefully maneuvering around the troll foot, umbrella stand. She passed the door to the dining room that was slightly ajar and saw Remus Lupin and the rest of the Order listening intently to something that Kingsley was saying. She paused momentarily, struggling not to stare. Last night, Remus and Tonks had staked out in front of the Dursley's place for Hestia and Delphias who were both needed for an undercover job, elsewhere. It had been a good night.
As usual, he was polite and witty. Their three hour long stakeout flew by much to her chagrin.
Tonks finally tore her gaze away from them and walked into the kitchen. Molly removed two tea cups from the cupboard and a tin of teabags.
Tonks leaned against the table, palms down and gnawed on her lower lip. Her latest bad habit of analyzing each conversation that she and Remus had surfaced.
"So, how was the stakeout last night?" Molly asked placing the tea bags in the mugs.
"Uneventful. The Dursely's stayed inside, watching television with Harry doing dishes."
"Those people… They make me sick to my stomach…" Molly grumbled, shaking her head.
"Too clean, they are…"
Tonks folded her arms and sighed.
'I feel so out of place here sometimes, Remus… I feel like the weakest link…' she had told Remus last night.
'Tonks, you are hardly the weakest link. Moody thinks very highly of you and in my opinion you are one of the most talented witches in the Order. I'm very impressed by you…' he replied.
"I assume that staking out with Remus made things a little better though, right?" Molly asked, jolting Tonks from her reverie.
Tonks's eyes snapped up. Had Molly figured out that she fancied Remus? Surely she hadn't. Tonks hadn't been at all obvious.
Yet, there Molly stood staring at Tonks with a knowing, but heartfelt smile. Tonks cleared her throat and ran a hand through her currently shaggy, orange hair.
"I suppose. He's…erm…he's nice," Tonks stammered.
Molly chuckled softly.
"Don't worry, I won't tell a soul, dear. He's a fine man," she remarked.
The kettle screeched and steamed. Molly faced the stove and turned down the burner beneath the kettle, causing the loud screaming of the spout to slowly fade and subside.
She poured the boiling water into the two ceramic mugs.
"Cream? Sugar? Honey?" offered Molly.
Tonks was still shaken and humiliated by Molly's realization of her schoolgirl crush.
"Black is just fine," Tonks managed to utter.
Molly passed Tonks her cup of tea and took a seat at the table. Tonks slowly joined her with a sigh. She glanced up and looked through the kitchen doorway to the dining room. Remus was now speaking, his brows furrowed slightly. Sirius sat beside him, nodding at whatever he was saying.
Of course he would be nodding. Everything Remus said was usually right. He was so intelligent.
"So, what smells so good?" asked Tonks.
"Breaded chicken, potatoes, rolls and green beans," stated Molly promptly.
There was a short silence in which Tonks's mind reeled with every possible way she could have revealed her fascination with Remus and if anyone else had noticed.
"I'm so embarrassed," Tonks blurted. "Am I that obvious?"
Molly chuckled and took a slow sip of her own tea.
"Oh, Tonks of course not. I'm just a mother. I can tell when a girl fancies someone. I have a daughter, you know? One who has fancied Harry Potter since she was ten," Molly remarked amusedly.
Tonks half smiled and took a drink of her own tea.
"Well, thanks for not telling anyone else."
"Who am I going to tell, Tonks? Arthur most certainly wouldn't care and he's the only one that I really talk to around here. I hardly see the man anymore. He's back at the Burrow with the kids right now," Molly sighed, dolefully.
Tonks looked out the door once more and sighed, angry with herself.
"Tonks, don't look so upset. Remus is such a good man. He works so hard and doesn't let his condition get in the way of anything he does," Molly stated with a look of reprimanding.
Tonks cocked her head to the side, inquisitively.
"Condition?"
Molly looked slightly surprised and raised her brows, then rolled her eyes with a small smile.
"Pardon me, his 'ailment' as he prefers to call it. Being a werewolf takes a toll on him… How he manages to deal with that and assist in an oncoming war I have no idea," she sighed, shaking her head.
Tonks's eyes widened and she looked into the dining room at Remus in disbelief.
It all made so much sense now.
The scars. The monthly absences. The air of secrecy he always carried about him.
A werewolf.
Why hadn't he told her? She had nothing against Werewolves. No one in the Order did as far as she knew.
"You knew that didn't you? Oh, no…" Molly said guiltily.
Tonks looked up again at Remus. His gaze met hers and he smiled at her slightly. His old eyes crinkling on his young face. Remus waved to her subtly and she managed to swallow and respond with a small smile.
"No, I-I knew," Tonks lied.
Slowly, Tonks tore her gaze from him and forced a smile for Molly.
Remus John Lupin. A werewolf.
AT DINNER…
Tonks sat silently, gnawing on her lower lip, eyes staring at her plate that had been barely touched. Remus was sitting beside her as usual, except this time they weren't talking as they customarily did at dinner. Usually, Tonks would be talking his ear off telling him various stories about her life and he would occasionally insert a witty quip making her laugh.
"I heard Dolohov's hideout was quite uneventful," Remus said, attempting to spark a conversation with her.
Tonks merely nodded, scooting her food around her plate with her fork.
"I'm glad I didn't miss anything. I would have hate to miss a good murder," he tried with a half-smile.
Tonks forced a grin at him. His eyes narrowed, trying to understand her very odd behavior. Remus had a bad feeling as to what it was that was causing her abnormal conduct. He quickly shook the thought of her knowing his secret from his mind and tried to come up with other reasons behind why she was being so peculiar.
He came up short.
THAT SAME NIGHT…
Tonks sat in the study, curled up by the fire. Her knees were drawn to her chest with her chin resting on them. Tonks's hair was its natural mousy brown.
She was hurt that Remus didn't share his secret with her. He had told Molly Weasley but not her? Had she offended him in some way? Did she come off as a typical Black with prejudices against anyone who less than a Pureblood?
The door creaked open, Tonks looked over her shoulder to see Remus standing in the doorway, his hands in the pockets of his shabby, worn sweater. He smiled at her warmly and walked into the study and began to let his eyes roam the titles of the books on the surrounding shelves. The dim light of the fire barely illuminating them. Remus's fingers traced the spines of the books and he sighed, trying to gain the courage to ask her for an explanation behind her cold demeanor today. He took a deep breath and finally spoke.
"Is everything alright, Tonks?" asked Remus finally selecting a book, turning around.
Tonks's eyes were downcast as she tried to figure out how to tell him that she knew his deepest darkest secret.
Then Remus figured it out.
He knew that look all too well.
Something was different about it though. Not only was she wearing a look of pity, sorrow and wariness…but also one of heartache.
Remus groaned softly, shaking his head and crossed to the armchair that sat a few feet from Tonks. He closed his eyes and massaged the bridge of his nose.
"Well, who told you?" he asked quietly.
Tonks's brows furrowed.
"Not from you," she grumbled.
Remus shrugged and shook his head, struggling to meet Tonks's gaze, though when he did, she averted her eyes.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tonks, honestly? It's not really something I love to inform people of," he said with a wry smile.
"I thought we were friends, Remus."
Remus sighed and ran a hand through his thick, light brown hair, frustrated. First, Tonks had discovered that he was a werewolf and now she would discover that he fancied her. Tonight was shaping up to be very disappointing.
"We are friends, Tonks. We are. It's just nice to have someone who enjoys my company and doesn't know I'm a werewolf. It wasn't that I didn't trust you. It was that I didn't want you to learn what I was. I didn't know how you would react. Believe it or not, there are some people out there who don't want to interact with my kind. I was unsure as to your stance on lycanthropy."
Tonks shook her head with a solemn expression.
"Do I really come off as someone who would be like that?"
Remus felt a small smile crawl on his lips. No. No she did not.
"You don't," he replied simply.
Seeing him smile, Tonks couldn't help but smile back. She loved his lopsided grin. It made him appear years younger. His actual age rather.
"I know that I shouldn't be angry with you… It's just a bit of a shock…"
"No, I understand. Finding out your friend is a monster tends to be a shock."
"You're not a monster," she murmured casually.
Remus's smile tipped higher. Tonks was so understanding. So kindhearted.
"You don't seem like one. I mean, I've never met one but I've always picture them more-"
"Aggressive? Hairy?" he smirked.
"No. Bitter. With good reason," explained Tonks.
Remus smiled at her and shook his head as though amused by a small child.
"I assure you that sometimes I am very bitter."
Tonks laughed softly, her posture relaxing ever so slightly. There was a long pause in which they both sat, looking at each other, soft smiles on their lips.
"Still friends?" Tonks clarified.
Remus laughed quietly and nodded at her.
"If you wish to be friends with an old, poor werewolf then yes."
"I do," Tonks replied with a grin.
That would not be the last time Nymphadora Tonks would respond "I do," while in Remus Lupin's presence.