…Hi. Katz here. Sheepishly. Because I haven't updated anything in…two months. Because of the usual excuses, you know. So, anyway, I was recently introduced to the TV show Doctor Who. Last night, I watched the episode "Father's Day" (with Christopher Eccleston's Doctor—number nine, right?) and I was more than a little bit annoyed with the Doctor by the end of it. I mean, I love the guy, he's fantastic, but seriously, why does saving Rose's dad change time more than, oh, I dunno, saving the lives of anyone else in the previous episodes? It seems to me that the Doc thinks it's okay for him to change time to fit what he wants, but not for anyone else to…
Anyway, here is my rant. To the tune of the Modern Major General song from Pirates of Penzance. Which, of course, I do not own. But do feel free to sing along. If you so desire, you can grab some friends, and they can sing the chorus parts (in italics).
XXX
So now you've got a time machine—the TARDIS is the very best
For taking people forward, backward, north and south and east and west
Things should be fine until, of course, you choose to step up and take charge
Because your efforts will of course create a hole in time that's large.
You'll find that you are stuck inside the tricky Timey Wimey Ball
In which you're just a useless human, stupid, slow, and very small
Who doesn't have a say in anything that happens here at all
Unlike the Doctor who contains the knowledge and the wherewithal.
(Unlike the Doctor who contains the knowledge and the wherewithal
Unlike the Doctor who contains the knowledge and the wherewithal
Unlike the Doctor who contains the knowledge and the wherewithaaaaal…)
Somehow he knows just what is right and what will mess up time and space
He'll do what he knows is the best for you and the whole human race
And if you ever wander through a conflict or a paradox
He'll shake it off and sally forth, 'cause he's the one who holds the clocks.
So don't you try to save your dad without asking the Doctor first
'Cause for some reason letting him survive could make things very worse
But there is nothing wrong in letting him save other victims' lives
Somehow the Time Lord always knows who should or who should not survive.
(But there is nothing wrong in letting him save other victims' lives
Somehow the Time Lord always knows who should or who should not survive!)