Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Anyanka belongs to Joss Whedon. He is God. Brandon and Susan
belong to Aaron Spelling.
Summary: This rather strange and silly fic was my response to watching an
old episode of Beverly Hills 90210 in which Emma Caulfield was guest
starring. I watched this scene and thought to myself, what would have
happened if Anyanka had appeared . . . . .
Feedback: Yes please. All feedback is not just welcome, but desired. Just
please don't flame me. It wouldn't be very nice.
Brandon walked into the newspaper office with a grim expression on his face. He knew that he had to tell Susan the truth. He just didn't know how.
"Hi honey!" Susan exuberantly approached Brandon, the eagerness in her eyes reminding him of a child on Christmas Eve. **She has no idea what's coming.**
Susan had been waiting all day for Brandon to arrive so that she could give him the good news about his article. She leaned up and placed a lingering kiss on his lips pouring all of her love for him into that small act. Susan felt Brandon stiffen and she moved away giving him a bewildered look which he didn't seem to notice. She dismissed it as nervousness about his article. **He loves me** she reassured herself.
"So guess what?" A huge grin crossed Susan's face. "The newspaper loved your article. You're going to be famous Brandon."
"That's great." He spoke with enthusiasm, but his eyes betrayed him.
"Well, you have all the makings of a great journalist. You're smart, persistent, and honest."
"Well two out of the three, anyway."
Susan's smile faded and she leaned on her desk, looking at Brandon with confusion. "Which one stumps you?"
"Susan. I have something to tell you." Susan felt a lump rise up in her throat. **Oh no. He's got that face. Something's coming. Oh crap. He's going to hurt me."
"What is it?"
"You know I love you, right? I'd never purposely hurt you." Brandon babbled, trying to postpone the inevitable, regretting getting himself into this situation.
"Get on with it Brandon. What happened?" Her normally soft chocolate eyes were cold, expressing a hardness that Brandon had never seen before.
"While you were away, Kelly spent the night at my house." At Susan's stunned and hurt look he quickly added, "But nothing happened."
"Then why did you tell me Brandon? Huh? I must say, I don't believe you." Susan tried hard to fight back to tears that were welling in her eyes.
"It's the truth. I love you." Susan turned so that he couldn't see the pain in her eyes. "Get out."
"But - " "GET OUT!" Susan screamed, the tears starting to fall uncontrollably.
As Brandon turned to go a cloud of red smoke appeared in front of him, fading to reveal a young woman almost identical to Susan, except the woman in front of him was blond. A silver charm holding a glowing green stone hung about her neck.
Petrified, Brandon tried to run, but it was futile. His feet were glued to the floor. He looked at the strange woman, pleading for her to release him, but she just smirked and passed him by, choosing instead to approach Susan.
The woman's eyes softened as she took in the heartbroken young woman and she reached out a hand to comfort her. Susan let the woman pat her shoulder in an awkward act of compassion. "Who are you?"
"I am Anyanka, the patron saint of scorned women." Anyanka spread her arms and smiled confidently. Susan's eyes widened. "Why are you here?"
"You've been scorned. I'm sure of it. Haven't you? You are Susan, aren't you?" a tablet appeared in Anyanka's left hand. "You're on my list."
"What do you want with me?"
"Why, I'm here to grant you a wish. Preferably a vengeful one. Those are the most fun." Susan's shock quickly dissolved into a wicked smirk as she looked over at her terrified boyfriend.
"So, I can wish for anything?"
"Anything at all."
"This should be fun. Mmmm. I wish that . . . no, that won't do. I wish . . . wait. That's no fun. Oh! I've got it! I wish that Brandon would be turned into sheep. Preferably a scrawny one." Brandon's eyes widened and he started shaking his head furiously and begging for forgiveness. His whole body trembled in fear.
Anyanka face became distorted and veiny as she turned to face Brandon. She smiled evilly. "Done."
A trail of green smoke rose up from the floor by Brandon's feet and spiraled about his body, slowly engulfing him. Susan looked on in awe. Anyanka spread her arms, palms facing outward, and the smoke dissipated, revealing a small, hairless sheep.
"So Brandon, what do you have to say for yourself?" Susan said, trying without success to conceal her laughter.
"Baaaaa."
Susan started laughing hysterically. "That's what I thought you'd say." The Brandon-sheep turned tail, literally, and fled out of the offices.
Susan then turned to Anyanka. "Thank you. I suddenly feel much better knowing that the bastard who broke my heart is now a sheep."
"Believe me. It was my pleasure."
Looking at the vengeance demon rather awkwardly, Susan wasn't sure what to do next. "So . . . do you want to go get a latte or something."
"A latte, eh? What's that? Is it some sort of man-whore." Susan gave the demon a strange and thoroughly humored look.
"Not exactly. Come on, I'll show you." Susan put her arm around Anyanka's shoulders and the two turned and walked out of the offices, leaving a bunch of thoroughly confused journalists standing in the offices.
"You know, Susan, you'd make one heck of a vengeance demon?"
"You think?"
End
Brandon walked into the newspaper office with a grim expression on his face. He knew that he had to tell Susan the truth. He just didn't know how.
"Hi honey!" Susan exuberantly approached Brandon, the eagerness in her eyes reminding him of a child on Christmas Eve. **She has no idea what's coming.**
Susan had been waiting all day for Brandon to arrive so that she could give him the good news about his article. She leaned up and placed a lingering kiss on his lips pouring all of her love for him into that small act. Susan felt Brandon stiffen and she moved away giving him a bewildered look which he didn't seem to notice. She dismissed it as nervousness about his article. **He loves me** she reassured herself.
"So guess what?" A huge grin crossed Susan's face. "The newspaper loved your article. You're going to be famous Brandon."
"That's great." He spoke with enthusiasm, but his eyes betrayed him.
"Well, you have all the makings of a great journalist. You're smart, persistent, and honest."
"Well two out of the three, anyway."
Susan's smile faded and she leaned on her desk, looking at Brandon with confusion. "Which one stumps you?"
"Susan. I have something to tell you." Susan felt a lump rise up in her throat. **Oh no. He's got that face. Something's coming. Oh crap. He's going to hurt me."
"What is it?"
"You know I love you, right? I'd never purposely hurt you." Brandon babbled, trying to postpone the inevitable, regretting getting himself into this situation.
"Get on with it Brandon. What happened?" Her normally soft chocolate eyes were cold, expressing a hardness that Brandon had never seen before.
"While you were away, Kelly spent the night at my house." At Susan's stunned and hurt look he quickly added, "But nothing happened."
"Then why did you tell me Brandon? Huh? I must say, I don't believe you." Susan tried hard to fight back to tears that were welling in her eyes.
"It's the truth. I love you." Susan turned so that he couldn't see the pain in her eyes. "Get out."
"But - " "GET OUT!" Susan screamed, the tears starting to fall uncontrollably.
As Brandon turned to go a cloud of red smoke appeared in front of him, fading to reveal a young woman almost identical to Susan, except the woman in front of him was blond. A silver charm holding a glowing green stone hung about her neck.
Petrified, Brandon tried to run, but it was futile. His feet were glued to the floor. He looked at the strange woman, pleading for her to release him, but she just smirked and passed him by, choosing instead to approach Susan.
The woman's eyes softened as she took in the heartbroken young woman and she reached out a hand to comfort her. Susan let the woman pat her shoulder in an awkward act of compassion. "Who are you?"
"I am Anyanka, the patron saint of scorned women." Anyanka spread her arms and smiled confidently. Susan's eyes widened. "Why are you here?"
"You've been scorned. I'm sure of it. Haven't you? You are Susan, aren't you?" a tablet appeared in Anyanka's left hand. "You're on my list."
"What do you want with me?"
"Why, I'm here to grant you a wish. Preferably a vengeful one. Those are the most fun." Susan's shock quickly dissolved into a wicked smirk as she looked over at her terrified boyfriend.
"So, I can wish for anything?"
"Anything at all."
"This should be fun. Mmmm. I wish that . . . no, that won't do. I wish . . . wait. That's no fun. Oh! I've got it! I wish that Brandon would be turned into sheep. Preferably a scrawny one." Brandon's eyes widened and he started shaking his head furiously and begging for forgiveness. His whole body trembled in fear.
Anyanka face became distorted and veiny as she turned to face Brandon. She smiled evilly. "Done."
A trail of green smoke rose up from the floor by Brandon's feet and spiraled about his body, slowly engulfing him. Susan looked on in awe. Anyanka spread her arms, palms facing outward, and the smoke dissipated, revealing a small, hairless sheep.
"So Brandon, what do you have to say for yourself?" Susan said, trying without success to conceal her laughter.
"Baaaaa."
Susan started laughing hysterically. "That's what I thought you'd say." The Brandon-sheep turned tail, literally, and fled out of the offices.
Susan then turned to Anyanka. "Thank you. I suddenly feel much better knowing that the bastard who broke my heart is now a sheep."
"Believe me. It was my pleasure."
Looking at the vengeance demon rather awkwardly, Susan wasn't sure what to do next. "So . . . do you want to go get a latte or something."
"A latte, eh? What's that? Is it some sort of man-whore." Susan gave the demon a strange and thoroughly humored look.
"Not exactly. Come on, I'll show you." Susan put her arm around Anyanka's shoulders and the two turned and walked out of the offices, leaving a bunch of thoroughly confused journalists standing in the offices.
"You know, Susan, you'd make one heck of a vengeance demon?"
"You think?"
End