Disclaimer:Anything you recognise, including characters, belong to their respective owners.This is a work of fiction and does not represent reality, please treat it as such.
Only Love Can Hurt Like This
- x-
Your kisses burn into my skin,
Only love can hurt like this
But it's the sweetest pain,
Burning hot through my veins,
Love is torture makes me more sure
Only love can hurt like this
Renee's eyelids fluttered open as she lay in bed, staring at his broad back and watching the soft rise and fall of his chest. The only light in the room came from the tiny gap in the curtains but the slither of light was just enough to illuminate the outline of his body.
She couldn't sleep. She suspected it was because she'd become so accustomed to curling up against his chest that she felt cold and lonely all the way over her own side of the bed. But she'd only arrived at the hotel an hour ago and he was already asleep. She didn't want to disturb him.
Rolling onto her back with a sigh, she tried to get comfortable. Lately, although he was just an arm's length away, it felt as though there were miles between them.
She must have sighed particularly loud because she felt him roll over next to her with a groan.
"Hey..." he opened one eye, his voice gravelly from sleep.
"Hi" she smiled, leaning across to kiss him.
"What time did you get in?"
"Only about an hour ago" she replied, brushing some of his unruly auburn curls out of his eyes.
"Come here..." he mumbled, holding out his arms. She snuggled closer, letting out a little noise of contentment as his arms secured themselves around her.
"I missed you" she told him, pressing another kiss to his soft lips.
"Missed you too" he said, dropping one last kiss to the top of her head before settling into the pillows with the intention of going back to sleep.
"I really missed you" she hinted, trailing her toes along his shin. When he didn't seem to get the hint, she slipped her hand under the waistband of his boxer-briefs and grabbed a handful of his ass.
"Renee don't..." he groaned, opening one eye.
She shrunk back at his tone. "Oh...if you don't want to then we don't have to..." she replied awkwardly, feeling deflated at being turned down for sex. It was almost embarrassing.
"I'm just tired Nae, that's all"
"Okay" she whispered. It didn't feel okay though.
It wasn't long before she felt him drift off, his breaths even and deep. But she couldn't sleep. Even in his arms, the rejection lingered. She knew he wasn't lying when he said he was tired, he had an exhausting schedule, but he normally had the most ridiculously high sex drive and lately, it just felt like the desire to be intimate had diminished completely...
- x -
Jon rushed around the room, trying to find his gym shorts. Even having managed to catch a few hours of sleep last night, it was still torture trying to drag himself out of bed this morning. He finally found them, tossing them into his bag. Joe would already be waiting in the lobby to take them to wherever the nearest Gold's was.
"That bag stinks, you really need to wash your gym gear" Renee commented from the bed. She looked adorable, blankets pooled at her waist, a little tank top covering her lithe body from his view and her hair sticking up in all directions. She rubbed her eyes tiredly as he approached the bed and gave her a quick kiss.
"It doesn't stink. It's full of my manly pheromones" he argued.
"Pfft" she laughed; grabbing his wrist and pulling him back down for another kiss. He felt her trying to deepen it and groaned, pulling away.
"Stop, I've gotta get to the gym" he chuckled.
Her face dropped. Shit. He didn't see that look often but he knew it didn't precede anything good.
"Go then" she huffed, grabbing her book from the bedside table. Suddenly, she'd flipped from cute morning kisses to being frosty with him and the reason was totally lost on him.
"Hey...what'd I do?" he asked, frowning.
"You know what Jon? Just go okay. You don't get it so just go"
"Woah, wait a fucking minute. You're not allowed to be pissed off with me and not tell me why..."
"I can do what I want Jon. Just go to the gym before I say something I'll regret" she told him sharply.
"Excuse me?" he challenged.
She was visibly stressed about something, the frown lines on her forehead told him as much. They'd been together long enough for him to decipher the difference between angry Renee and upset Renee. This was upset Renee through and through.
He felt his heart rate increase. He could count on one hand the number of arguments they'd had since they started dating and they were always over silly things like where to spend the weekend and him staying out too late. Those arguments always resolved themselves quickly. This one felt different...
"Nae what the fuck is wrong? You don't want me to go the gym? What's the problem?"
"The fact that you don't know what the problem is, that is the problem!"
"You know what, if you want to be all cryptic then that's fine. We haven't seen each other in days and I was looking forward to spending some time with you but I didn't expect you to bitch me out for going to work out with Joe" he finally lost his cool. It was a rare occurrence despite his unpredictable on-screen character. He was usually very level-headed but he was tired and frustrated this morning.
What he didn't expect was what happened next.
She burst into tears.
In all the time he'd known her, she'd cried twice; once at a particularly heart-wrenching movie they'd seen and once because she missed her mom and didn't get to see her on her birthday. Never had he made her cry. Ever. And he felt like an asshole.
He had to remind himself that it was she who picked a fight with him. Clearly there was something on her mind and she was irritable.
He let out a sigh.
"Look, we'll talk about this later, Joe's waiting on me"
All he got in response was a sniffle and he knew he couldn't leave her on such a bad note. Walking over to the bed, he crouched down beside it and looked her in the eye.
"I don't know what just happened but we'll sort it out when I get back okay?"
He got a brief nod in reply and wiped a thumb under her eye, catching some of the moisture. Dropping a quick kiss to her forehead, he left.
- x -
"Why are you wearing sunglasses inside?" Summer asked her dubiously as they sat inside the little bistro, waiting for their waiter to take their lunch order.
Renee sighed and lowered her glasses so Summer could see her bloodshot, watery eyes.
"Oh my God babe, what happened?"
Renee pushed her glasses back into place and crossed her legs before answering.
"Me and Jon had a fight"
Summer's face softened. "What about?"
"Nothing...it's stupid"
Summer reached across and grabbed her hand. "It's obviously not stupid if you're this upset about it"
"Let's get our food first and catch up, I don't want to ruin our lunch date talking about myself the whole time"
They made chit chat, Summer telling Renee all about her trip to Abu Dhabi. Their food soon arrived, Summer opting for a light salad and Renee choosing something a bit more comforting with a big bowl of pasta.
"So..." Summer said, resting her elbows on the table as she stuck her fork into some lettuce. "...what happened this morning?"
Renee blushed. She was embarrassed, but she and Summer were incredibly close friends and nothing was off limits when it came to topics of conversation.
"I got mad at him because he refused sex with me to go to the gym with Joe..."
"That's it?" Summer laughed. "Guys are allowed to 'have a headache' too you know"
"Not exactly. It's been going on for a while. We haven't had sex in forever"
Summer's eyes widened. "How long are we talking?"
"I couldn't even tell you" Renee sighed. "At least a month"
"Jesus Christ Nae" Summer gasped. "A month?"
"I know. I tried to start something last night too and he said he was tired. I'd think he was getting it somewhere else if I wasn't with him almost all the time"
"Have you caught him, you know...jackin' off?" Summer asked.
Renee shook her head, blushing again. "I believe him when he says he's tired, I mean, his media schedule is insane. He's up at like 5am most mornings and we don't get to sleep until the early hours but we had loads of sex before..."
"What's 'normal' for you?" she asked.
"At least every day, if not more. And even if we were busy, we'd find time to have a little fun, if you know what I mean"
"Have you talked to him?"
"I'm scared" Renee admitted. "Maybe he's lost interest..."
"I doubt that Nae" Summer squeezed her friend's hand. "Does he kiss you? Or do you have to initiate it?"
"He initiates it all the time" Renee sighed. "We don't make out any more though, not like we did. It's like the passion has gone"
"You really need to talk to your man babe. You need to tell him how you feel. Snapping at him and fighting over little things that aren't the real issue isn't going to solve this. Maybe he's got something going on or something on his mind..."
"I'm just scared this is the end" Renee admitted, trying not to get upset again.
"If you guys don't talk through this and do something, then maybe it will be"
Summer saw the horror on Renee's face and held up her hands.
"I'm not trying to scare you, but you have to be honest with yourself. If you guys aren't being intimate, then how long can you function without that side of the relationship?"
"I love him to bits Summer" Renee confessed.
"I know you do. He's a lovely guy"
"I've never met anyone as kind-hearted, funny and adorable in my life. I love everything about him. I can't imagine my life without him in it"
"You don't have to. Talk to him. You'll be fucking like bunnies again in no time"
"Summer!" Renee blushed furiously.
- x –
Jon got back to the room later than usual. Joe had known immediately that something was up and had insisted on going for coffee after their work-out. Jon told his 'brother' all about Renee's outburst this morning and Joe had given him some good advice.
"She's obviously got something serious on her mind" he'd said. "It makes me happy, seeing you all loved up. Make sure you guys work it out"
With that in mind, Jon unlocked the door and stepped inside.
"Nae?" he called, announcing his return.
She was facing away from him when he saw her, busy doing something.
"I'm sorry about earlier" he apologised first. He wanted her to know that he hated seeing her cry, even if she did start it.
When she turned around, he saw what she'd been doing. On the bed was a banquet of room service. She'd laid it all out the way he liked it, with everything positioned in the order she knew he'd eat it.
"I'm sorry too" she told him, offering him a slice of garlic bread.
"You're trying to ruin my figure" he chuckled, taking a bite.
"One cheat day won't kill you" she said, quietly mourning the fact that she hadn't actually seen his gorgeous body in its entirety in a while either.
They ate, chatting about Jon's work out and Renee's lunch date before Renee got to the point.
"I think we need to talk" she said, twiddling her thumbs in her lap.
"I was about to suggest the same" Jon replied, wiping his hands on a napkin so he didn't get BBQ sauce all over the bed.
"I just want to know if you really haven't noticed what's lacking in our relationship lately..."
When Jon frowned in confusion, Renee knew he genuinely wasn't aware of the problem.
"I was upset this morning because that was the second time in the space of a few hours that you told me to 'stop' when I tried to be intimate with you..." she whispered.
She could see the moment it dawned on him and he brought a hand up to his forehead. "That's what this is all about?"
"When was the last time we had sex Jon? Answer me that" she challenged, hurt by his 'surprise' at her confession.
His brow furrowed. "I guess it's been a while"
"More than a while..."
"I've been exhausted Renee, you know how crazy my schedule is. When we finally get some alone time I like to lay in bed with you and catch up on sleep. Plus, there were plenty of times we could have done the horizontal tango recently but you won't because someone we work with is in the room next door and the walls are too thin. I don't even try anymore because I know what the answer will be..."
That was true, he had a point. "I just don't like the idea of Paige or Summer sitting next door listening to us having sex..."
"Why didn't you tell me you were sexually frustrated Nae?" he asked.
"I didn't want to say anything in case you weren't interested any more...I figured maybe I don't do it for you anymore because you always had a super high sex drive when we first met and now it just seems to be the last thing you want to do..."
"Just because I like sex doesn't mean I don't go through spells of pushing it to the back of my mind. Of course you do it for me, you're fucking gorgeous. But between the lack of sleep and the stress, timing just hasn't worked out for us. I'm beat up Nae. You know I hate admitting it but I'm still hurting from that fall at Mania. This might surprise you but I'm not nineteen anymore and I'm not ready to go anyplace any time" he waggled his eyebrows at her.
"Shame" she teased, letting him pull her body to his. "Pretty sure that time in the restroom at the airport contradicts what you just said..."
"Mmm...that was hot" he mumbled, kissing her jaw. "I'm still a little sore, but I think I can fit you in right about now if you're interested" he whispered into the shell of her ear.
"I might be able to take your mind off being sore. Maybe make you sore in some different places..."
He groaned. He loved this woman. She still blew his mind even after all this time.
"Orton's next door..." she suddenly remembered.
"Fuck him" Jon replied, kissing her with that passion she hadn't felt in forever. It made her weak in the knees as the sensations of his stubble rubbing against her skin made her quiver with anticipation. "If he wants to listen then let's give him a show"
She yelped when he picked her up and deposited her on the bed, attacking her neck with sharp little nips and kisses and giving her no room to argue. He linked the fingers of their hands and pushed them over her head, pinning them to the pillows.
"We need to get some handcuffs" he growled against her neck. "Pretty sure I've seen some stretchy ones in your lingerie drawer at my place" he teased.
"Jesus Christ Jon, what's gotten into you?" she gasped, back arching.
"You've reawakened my primal side" he rasped as she hooked her ankles at the base of his spine. "I can't believe you thought you didn't 'do it' for me anymore. Feel..." he took her hand and guided it to his groin.
The hitch in her breath was obvious as she wrapped a hand around his rock hard erection through his shorts.
He frantically pulled her shirt over her head and unsnapped her bra. Shimmying out of them, she helped him unbutton her jeans and kicked off her panties.
"God, you're gorgeous" he breathed. "I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'm a lucky son of a bitch"
She cupped the back of his head, massaging his scalp with her nails. He leaned into her touch, letting out a satisfied little whine.
"I'm the lucky one. You're the most adorable, sweet, caring, loving man. I don't know why you put up with me sometimes but I'm happy you do"
"I'm a goof" he replied, deflecting her compliments.
"But you're my goof and I adore you"
At that, he placed his big palm against the side of her neck and captured her lips in a searing kiss that stole all of the breath from her body. The sensation of his thumb gently caressing her skin in back and forth motions combined with his tongue curling around her own made her moan into his mouth.
"Someone's eager" he smirked when he realised her hand was already inside his shorts.
"You've made me wait this long Jon, what do you expect?" she freed his erection and gave it a few strokes. His flesh was hot in her hand and left no doubt he wanted this as badly as she did.
"Tell me what you want" he whispered.
"I want to suck your cock" she admitted, giving him a squeeze to emphasis her point.
"Holy shit" he threw his head back. "I don't have words to respond to that but fuck, I need you to go easy on me. It's been a long time and I don't want to...fire too quickly, if you catch my drift"
She smiled as he rolled off of her and made himself comfortable, arms behind his head. She undid the drawstring on the front of his shorts and slipped them down his strong legs, watching his erection spring free. He watched her intently as she took him into her mouth and his eyes glazed over at the sensation.
"I forgot how good that feels" he groaned.
She didn't waste time teasing him, knowing this was going to be over pretty quickly. She sucked him down, going straight for all his weak spots.
"Fuck" he fought to keep still, knuckles turning white as he gripped the headboard.
She looked up at him, keeping her eyes locked to his so he could see just how much she'd missed this.
"Shit...stop...I'm gonna cum..."
With one final, slow stroke of her tongue, she let him go with a 'pop'.
"What do you want Jon?" she asked, turning the tables on him.
"You" he replied simply.
"Be more specific" she teased, internally melting at how cute he was being. "Tell me what you want..."
"You...on all fours" he told her breathily.
With a cheeky grin, she crawled up the bed, kissing him deeply before getting into his requested position.
His big hands traced the contours of his body as he moved to kneel behind her and she shot him a devious look over her shoulder. He ran his palms over her ass, kneading the flesh.
"You're incredible" she heard him mumble.
She turned her head again, catching his eye. She smiled, feeling the electricity sparking between them.
"You're honestly the most beautiful woman I've ever seen"
She blushed, looking away.
"Look at me" he coaxed. "I want you to look at me when I tell you that. Because it's true...don't ever question that. And if I neglect you again, talk to me before it gets this bad okay?"
"You've never neglected me Jon..." she argued.
"I let you think I wasn't attracted to you. I did neglect you. I love every part of our relationship" he smiled. "I love that we can just lay on the couch and talk some nights instead of always going out and I love that sometimes when we crawl into bed exhausted, we don't feel like we have to have sex. But I love sex as much as the next guy and you always get my heart racing. Nothing has changed since the days in the beginning when we'd sneak off and have sex in the bathroom at the bar. It's just we're both so much busier now and sometimes things get pushed aside. But I don't ever want making you feel sexy and wanted to be that low on the list..."
"I love you" she whispered over her shoulder.
"I love you too" he pulled her up until her back met his chest and turned her head to kiss her deeply, his tongue stroking across her lips and his teeth pulling at her lower lip in a way that always made her stomach do little flips of arousal.
"I promise I won't be shy about hotel rooms anymore..." she told him when he finally broke the kiss.
"Good" he kissed her again, positioning himself and thrusting forward carefully.
Renee threw her head back and let out a delicious sound. Jon stroked a hand down the curve of her spine, taking hold of her hips as he set a slow pace that built until the sound of their bodies colliding filled the room.
"Jon" she moaned.
He knew what she wanted. He kept his left hand on her hip, his right loosely around her neck as he brought her up to his chest again. Her eyes drifted closed as he increased the pace. The headboard was smacking against the wall now but she didn't seem to notice.
He reached down between her legs and she lost it, making the sweetest noises as he drove her over the edge. He clung to her, stopping her from falling face-first onto the bed.
When she found enough strength to support herself, she lay down on her front, Jon's body covering hers. She could feel how close he was and he must have been holding back for some time. The force of his thrusts increased to the point each one moved her whole body on the bed. She forgot how much bigger than her he was sometimes.
She felt him grab her hand, his rhythm faltering. She felt his face against her shoulder, muffling the throaty sounds of his pleasure as he came. He stilled, shuddering before collapsing.
He quickly rolled off her, his weight crushing her lithe frame.
"That was fucking fantastic" he exhaled a long breath.
"You're fucking fantastic" she countered.
He rolled his head over to look at her and grinned.
"I'm never waiting that long again" he laughed.
"You might have to when you have kids" she joked. She almost said 'when we have kids' but she chose not to. She didn't want to freak him out.
"What do you mean when 'I' have kids?" he chuckled. "I hope you're not already delegating me for night feeds..."
Renee's heart warmed at that. She might have had reservations about vocalising the idea of one day having a family with him, but he clearly didn't and that was typical of his open nature.
Rolling over to drape herself across his chest, she let him see the smile that his words had caused.
"Well, I think that's only fair seeing as you don't have to push a watermelon out of your vagina..."
He grimaced. "I could have lived without that visual"
Jon saw a cheeky look cross her face and sent her a curious glance.
"I was confiding in Summer...she raised a good point"
"And what was that?" he raised a brow, caressing her neck absent-mindedly.
"In our ahem...dry spell...did you jerk off to tide you over?" she blushed at saying that out loud.
He threw his head back at that, laughing loudly. "No" he chuckled. "Like I said, it was at the back of my mind"
"Okay" she giggled, leaning up to kiss him softly.
All of a sudden, she nearly jumped out of her skin, grabbing onto his biceps when there was a loud banging on the wall.
"I hope you two are fucking finished!" they heard a muffled shout through the wall.
Renee buried her face in Jon's neck, embarrassment flooding her. "Oh my God. Randy Orton just listened to us have sex. Kill me now"
Jon chuckled and she felt the sound resonate in his chest. "If making Orton jealous is the small price I have to pay to have sex that good then I'll happily piss him off every night for the rest of his career"
Renee raised her eyebrows. "I'll remind you that you said that when you come complaining to me tomorrow that he took a shit in your bag..."
- x -
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