What if Naruto…went to the movies and bought a giant huge box of jelly donuts.
Naruto pushed aside the big brass doors to the movies and walked up to the concession stand. When he got up to the front he looked at what they had and thought. Then Naruto burst out saying "I'll have a giant huge box of jelly donuts. Believe it!!!"
Okkaaay. The employee thought.
After getting one of those huge scrumptious boxes of huge giant jelly donuts, Naruto was suddenly ambushed by ninja from the Village Hidden in the Rump. "Give us your giant huge jelly donuts or be prepared for a fart of your life!!"
"Never!! I bought these with my own money and they are dear to me!!!" Naruto screamed. "I will protect the donuts I love with my life. You really think you can beat me!!"
"So be it. Let us begin!!"
ROUND 1 DING!!!
"Okkkay? Where did that voice come from? Oh well."
"So kid, are you going to give up? I will give you one more chance to give up those jelly donuts." The Rump ninja said. "I am a jonin level ninja while you are a wimpy genin."
" You will not escape here today you wimpy Rumpgakure ninjas. I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!"
Doing Ox, Monkey, Rabbit, Rat, Boar, Bird, Ox, Horse, Bird, Tiger, Dog, Tiger, Snake, Ox, Sheep, Snake, Pig, Sheep, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Dragon, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Monkey, Dragon, Bird, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Monkey, Rabbit, Boar, Dragon, Ox, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Bird, Naruto said, "Water Style; Water Dragon Jutsu. The surrounding ninja who couldn't escape from Naruto's technique were crushed by the onslaught of water and died from the impact to the wall.
The only remaining ninja was the one our young hero was talking to. Suddenly he jumped towards Naruto doing some hand seals rapidly then shouted, "Rump Style; Big Boom Blast!!" As soon as he said that a cloud of gas exploded out of his rump racing toward Naruto. Naruto jumped out of the way and created 5 shadow clones. Deploying 2 of them to go behind the enemy ninja and 1 to each side of him, the two shadow clones did Sheep, Serpent, Tiger, Rabbit, Serpent, Dragon, Rabbit, Bird and shouted, "Water Style; Water Prison Jutsu!" Capturing the unsuspecting ninja in his trap Naruto did a couple hand seals and shouted, "Chidori!!" Then running up to the water prison he thrust his lightning covered into the Rump ninjas chest effectively killing him in an instant.
"Fools." Naruto muttered to himself. Walking down the aisle he noticed all the seats were taken. Thinking he made 2 shadow clones. The first one did Ox, Monkey, Rabbit, Rat, Boar, Bird, Ox, Horse, Bird, Tiger, Dog, Tiger, Snake, Ox, Sheep, Snake, Pig, Sheep, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Dragon, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Monkey, Dragon, Bird, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Monkey, Rabbit, Boar, Dragon, Ox, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Bird, creating a water dragon and washing an entire section out of their seats and out the movie theater. The second clone did Tiger, Ox, Monkey, Rabbit, Sheep, Boar, Ox, Horse, Monkey, Tiger, Dog, Tiger, Serpent, Tiger, Ox, Monkey, Rabbit, Bird, creating a water vortex that washed another section out. The real Naruto did Snake, Dragon, Horse, Ram, Bird, Dog, Ox, Rabbit, Monkey, creating the second level of Chidori which scared the remaining people so much about 20 of them wet themselves. Laughing to himself Naruto shouted. "Ha ha! I made you pee in your pants!! Ha ha ha ha haaa ha!"
He then sat down and watched his movie in peace. After watching his movie Naruto left the movies and went to train. He made 20 shadow clones and each did Ox, Monkey, Rabbit, Rat, Boar, Bird, Ox, Horse, Bird, Tiger, Dog, Tiger, Snake, Ox, Sheep, Snake, Pig, Sheep, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Dragon, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Monkey, Dragon, Bird, Ox, Horse, Sheep, Tiger, Snake, Rat, Monkey, Rabbit, Boar, Dragon, Ox, Rat, Ox, Monkey, Bird, Rat, Boar, Bird, creating a water dragon and they all came together and joined to make one huge water dragon. Almost out of chakra Naruto ate one of his jelly donuts, which replenished his strength. He then felt a chakra presence nearby and threw his kunai behind him. Twirling around he found himself face to face with Orochimaru who had caught his kunai.
"Now now, Naruto. Do you need to throw kunai at me? All I want to do is kiss you."
"Go away you gay freak!! I don't want to kiss you or anything. You like little boys, you are 50, and you are evil!'
"Just because I'm evil doesn't mean I can't love little boys all the same."
Suddenly the Third Hokage appeared and sealed away Orochimaru's arms. "NOOOO!!! Now I can't use my arms to use jutsus and more importantly to touch little boys!! NOOOO!!!"
Both Naruto and the Hokage sweat dropped at this. Here was the evil Orochimaru who was the scourge of the village crying like a little girl because he couldn't touch little boys again. Then the Hokage died.
"I feel like eating ramen." Naruto said to himself leaving a sobbing Orochimaru and a dead Hokage to themselves.
Walking back to his apartment Naruto tripped on a pile of leaves and fell in a river. After getting washed upstream Naruto looked around and saw a person cooking something on a stove. Walking over to that person Naruto tapped them on the shoulder. The person jumped and whirled around. The person did some hand seals and a giant wall of sand appeared between the two. Naruto charged up a Rasengan and smashed it apart. And standing there was Gaara.
"Hello Naruto."
"Hey Gaara. Want to go swimming."
"Sure"
"Then lets go it is getting dark."
"You're right. Lets go."
And away they walked.
But first they(Put in whatever you want. I'm bored...I feel like tacos.)
THE END