A/N : This story contains spoilers for Season 7 and it will make no sense if you haven't seen episode 3!
Episode 5 has never happened, since I needed things to go another way. I'm not sure about episode 6, but that probably won't happen, either!
All in all, this is my take on how things could go if Sam finds out about Dean's secret.
A/N 2: I'm trying my best to stay loyal to the characters and the show, but Sam's recent behavior makes me believe this is the way he'd react!
I'm pretty mad at Sam, right now and I'm a Dean girl. Yes! But I like them both and I admire the brotherly love between Dean and Sam! So, there's no hostility behind any words of this fiction. It's the way it is just because I'm sure this could happen at some points!
Reviews are really appreciated. I'd love to know your ideas, but please, if you wanna accuse me for bashing Sam, don't bother to leave a comment! Once again, I assure you that this is not a character-bashing story!
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"You lied to me!" Sam shouted at Dean, repeating the same sentence for the tenth times.
"YES. Dammit." Dean finally shouted back. "But did I have any other choice? No! Did you give me any other option? Another No."
"Oh, so it's my fault now?"
"I don't think there's anything wrong here to be anyone's fault." Dean leaned against the wall.
"Nothing is wrong? Nothing is wrong?" Sam wanted so bad to hit Dean. "You killed Amy after I asked you not to and explained to you that killing her wasn't the right thing. And you still went behind my back and killed her. Behind my back, while you pretended that you've listened to me and trusted me!"
"Are you done?"
Sam glared at him.
"Listen Sam, I know you're angry. I get it, okay? But what would you do if you were in my shoes? You were too emotionally involved to make the right decision. I'm sorry I lied to you, I just wanted to protect you. As about killing Amy, I'm sorry that it had to be done, but I'm not sorry for killing her. She was a monster, Sam. Admit it."
"She had it under control. She wasn't a monster."
"Yes, she said she wouldn't kill, but what do you think she would do next time her kid got sick? You think she would really keep a stupid promise and let her child die? I don't think so." Dean shook his head. He was angry, but he was also tired; more like exhausted. He couldn't argue with his brother for doing the right thing. He just didn't have the energy.
"Her child. O my god, tell me you didn't kill her child, too."
"What the hell? Of course, I didn't. What do you think I am?"
"Actually, I have no idea, right now. You're nothing like my brother, for sure. You sound more like a monster to me." Sam wasn't happy with what he had said, but he was too angry to care. He caught the look of hurt that passed over Dean's face and felt satisfied.
"Have it your way. I just hope, one day, you grow up enough to realize that it was the right thing to do. I'm sorry if I sound like a monster to you, but I'm a hunter and it's my job to save people from Amy's kind. I'd kill her again if I have to. So deal with it." with that Dean turned to leave the room, but stopped when Sam called his name.
Turning around he expected many things, but a punch wasn't one of them really. Sam's fist connected with his cheek and his neck snapped back. Caught by surprise, Dean staggered a few steps back.
"Sometimes I think I don't even know you anymore." Sam gritted out as he grabbed his duffel bag and walked to the door. "We better split up before I -" he let the word hang in the air. "Don't look for me. I'm done here." and just like that he left the room, slamming the door behind him.
Dean stared at the empty room for a few more seconds before coming back to his senses. "You'll never change Sammy boy, will you?" he sighed and walked to the frig. Grabbing a beer, he sunk to the nearest chair, putting the cold bottle on his throbbing cheek.
He was too tired and for the first time he was glad to feel that way; because he knew that if he was just a little less tired, Sam's words and punch would've stung way worse. Right now, though, he was just numb.
Yes, those words had hurt like hell, but he felt too empty to care. Thinking about the last few years, he couldn't help but chuckle at his situation. It has been like that for years, now. Nothing was new; neither the words, nor the punch. He's been the target of those things way too many times in the past few years. It almost felt like he was everybody's whipping boy.
The sad thing was he had expected things to go that way and that was partly why he had hidden the truth. A part of him wanted to protect Sam; didn't want to upset him. But the other part was just afraid of losing Sam, again.
Although he was sure it would end like this, a little part of him desperately wanted it to be different this time; wanted Sam to understand and stay by him. Wanted- needed to see a little loyalty.
But who was he kidding? He knew better than that. He didn't really need Sam for going through life. He could manage by his own, just fine. His brother had left him more times than he could remember and basically he'd taken care of himself and his family since he was just a kid.
So no, that wasn't the problem. He wanted Sam by his side, for some other reasons. He wanted to make sure that his little brother was safe. To make sure he could protect him. The other part of him just wanted to have him around; to keep what little family he had left, close. And now, that little family was gone. Again.
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"He'll come back to you, Dean. He can't stay gone for long." Bobby said from the other side of the line, when he heard the story.
"I know. I just hope it's not too late."
"Again." Bobby finished for him.
"Just keep an eye out, will you? To make sure he's not in trouble or danger." Dean sighed.
"He's a grown up, Dean. He can take care of himself. You need to stop looking after him."
"I wish I could, but sometimes I can't help but feel he's still a kid."
Bobby sighed inwardly and kept himself from saying that it was partly Dean's fault. Dean never had a childhood, and that was why he tried so hard to make sure Sam had one. Maybe he went too far. If he'd let Sam face the consequences of his actions and take the blame for his mistakes, he wouldn't act so childish, right now. But he couldn't say it aloud, Dean didn't need another lecture. "I will look for him." he said instead. "You take care of yourself, boy and don't do anything stupid. We still don't know anything about those Leviathans."
"Yeah, I know. I'll be careful."
"Why am I not convinced?"
"Take care Bobby, give me a call if you hear anything." Dean changed the subject.
"Sure thing, boy. But Dean, you sure you are-"
"I'm fine Bobby. I'm always fine. We don't have time for this."
"You did the right thing, you know that, right?"
"I do, but somehow it doesn't make me feel any better."
"It'll get better."
"Sure. Take care. I'll see you soon." Dean said and hung up the phone. Grabbing his beer, he settled into the chair to go through some articles about the new hunt he had ahead.
...
Bobby put all his effort into finding Sam but it was a week later when he finally got a call from someone who knew where he could find that boy. And the ironic thing was that the call was actually from Dean, telling him that he knew where his brother was and asking him to go and talk to him. Bobby thought about refusing and making Dean go, himself. But knowing how pigheaded Sam could be, he decided to cut Dean some slack and he, himself, headed to meet Sam.
"Looking for something?" Bobby said to Sam who was slowly waking up and was looking for his Beretta under his pillow.
Sam jumped at his voice and relaxed back when he saw who he was. "Bobby." he growled. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"Good morning to you, too." Bobby didn't answer his question.
"Dean send you?" Sam asked angrily.
"Yes. Because unlike you, he gets worried and cares for his family." Bobby retorted.
"Ahh, give me a break." Sam slowly got up and stretched his body. "You can go back and tell him to screw himself. I don't need a lecture. I don't wanna know how you've gotten in, but you can use the door to get out. I don't wanna hear from Dean, anymore."
"I don't care what you want. I'm not your little carrier pigeon and I won't leave here until I give you a piece of my mind."
"Sure. Go ahead and blame me for everything." Sam leaned against the bathroom door frame. "Just make it quick. I wanna go for a run and then I gotta go to the library for some research."
That really irritated Bobby. Standing up from his seat, he was in Sam's face in a fraction of a second. "Oh, I'll make it fast. Because seriously what's there to say? Just that you're too damn like your father and too damn pigheaded for your own good. You can't see what you're doing to Dean; or to yourself, for that matter. You're acting just like a little brat; closing your eyes and opening your mouth, letting any unwholesome talk come out without giving it a second thought. And Dean says you're smart." Bobby said sarcastically.
"Get back to your brother, dammit. You both have been through a lot. Don't you think we've already enough on our plates? We don't have time for you to play hide and seek. Those damn monsters weren't enough so you'd to pick a quarrel with your own brother, too?"
"He betrayed me. Can't you see that?" Sam shouted back.
"No I can't. Because from where I'm standing the thing he did was the right thing and deep down, you know it, too. You're just hurt because he didn't go the way you wanted him to and cuz he kept it hidden from you; while I'm sure you would've done exactly the same."
Sam was red with rage, he could hear Lucifer's voice mocking him and it was irritating him even more. Dean had somehow managed to keep him in line as he always felt safe around Dean. The voices had gotten louder during the past week that he had been away and it scared and aggravated him to no end.
"Open your eyes, Sam. All your brother is trying to do is helping you and I know what a hard time you have; I know, boy and I'll be there for you whenever you need me, but I can't be Dean for you. Nobody can." Bobby's voice was lower and soothing.
"Dean's on the edge, Sam. I'm sure you've noticed, or at least you did before giving him all those crap. He's had enough and he's stopped caring about his limits. You two are each other's anchors. Don't do something you'll regret later. Go back to your brother, Sam."
"I can't. Not now."
"Dammit, you idjit. What the hell is wrong with you? You're giving those monsters out there what they need. How many times do you need to go through the same thing to finally learn your lessons? Because this is like a figgin' déjà vu to me. A damn déjà vu which I have seen more than once. Enough is enough, Sam."
"I said not now. He needs to understand that he'd made a mistake." Sam wasn't sure why he had said it, maybe because he couldn't bring himself to apologize; but he actually had enough time to think and realize that it wasn't Dean who had made a mistake. He knew that he would've done the same thing if the tables were reversed.
"That's what this is about?" Bobby looked at him in shock. "You just can't say 'sorry'?" He let out a bitter laugh. "Don't worry, I don't think Dean ever expect you to say it. Just go back and it will be over."
Sam grabbed his towel and walked towards the bathroom. "Close the door behind you."
"You stupid idjit. You're just like your father. You can't admit that you've been wrong. I've had enough. Do whatever you want, just don't come running to me, asking for help when the unimaginable happens." and with that he strode out, leaving the door open behind him.
Inside the bathroom, Sam sank to the floor and remained there for the next couple of hours. When he finally got up, he collected his stuff and went to find another hunt. That town was suffocating.
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... TBC ...
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Let me know what you think? :)
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