Smile and Hide the Truth
'Walking down 29th & Park
I saw you in another's arms
Only a month we've been apart
You look happier'
*Percy*
This time of year sucked if you were alone. I always figured Valentine's Day would be the worst time to be alone. I honestly had no clue because I had nothing to base that off of until now. Just T.V. shows and movies that told you what a loser you were to not have a date, or worse, to get dumped on Valentines.
They were wrong. Christmas rips your heart in two and then again and again until you think there is absolutely nothing left to rip. We are talking about prime cuddle time here. Carriage rides, winter carnivals, caroling around town, just the overall feeling of this time of year was so much more than the feeling you got from Valentine's. Everyone shared the same sentiments, whether they believed in the spirit of Christmas or not. You could just feel it in the air.
You get dumped this time of year and it instantly kills the joy. Your friends don't want to be around you because you suck the life from the room and yet at the same time they try their hardest to be there for you but they just can't fill the void. Christmastime definitely sucks to be alone.
I tried to get rid of the memories of her but it was impossible. She was such an important person in my life. She had been there since we were both twelve and she never once left my side. Not even the first time I screamed at her and told her I wished I had never met her.
That was a lie. She knew it was a lie. It was her seeing through that lie that kept her around. Granted, I had to work a thousand times harder to keep her around but there is only so much a person can take before they just up and leave.
I walked for what felt like forever, my feet guiding the way. I wasn't exactly sure where I was heading but something made me stop dead in my tracks; honey colored curls, bouncing down her back as she walked. I shook my head, that couldn't be her.
'It could be her and you know damn well it is!'
Intently I watched, rooted to the spot as she stopped at the next corner. Inching my way forward, I stopped at my corner to see a man join her, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close.
The lights changed and they moved and in turn I did the same. I knew where I was going now; the area so familiar and yet not, as I hadn't been here since we parted ways. She wasn't taking him there because it wasn't her. I wouldn't allow myself to go there. It was the only way I would survive. And yet, I couldn't help it. I was failing at surviving without her.
They walked slowly, tangled up in each other. We used to walk like that, so consumed with the other that sometimes we walked into things or people . . . until I lost control anyway. Until I drove her away.
I stopped at the next corner, taking in their contagious presence a block ahead and wished so badly to be the one holding her but it wasn't her. 'This has to stop Percy! Not every girl with curly blonde hair is her! But, not every curly headed blonde girl carried themselves the way she did.' My brain couldn't shut off and it was literally driving me insane.
She stopped abruptly, turning her body so that she was now facing me. No, not me but rather him. He pushed a stray curl from her face and even from here I could see the smile plastered on her face.
'You look happier.'
'I saw you walk inside a bar
He said something to make you laugh
I saw that both your smiles were twice as wide as ours
Yeah, you look happier, you do.'
A tear ran down my cheek and I quickly pushed the offender away. I didn't need people staring at me any more than they probably already were.
The couple kept going, turning into a small coffee shop. I inhaled sharply, taking in her beauty as she walked into the shop with him. It was enough to make my blood boil and then instantly it simmered. This was my fault after all.
She radiated confidence, something I thought I had destroyed in her after our many fights. She was beyond beautiful. There were not enough words to describe her. Her cheeks flushed in the cold and how I longed to be the one to keep her warm.
I couldn't get the image of her smile out of my head and my feet continued on.
I stopped in front the shop and leaned against the front window. There they were, at our table, her head on his shoulder as she held her cup. I could see her eyes glaze over slightly as she took a slow sip. Storm clouds rolled into her gray orbs and quickly diminished as he whispered in her ear and she turned, leaving a light kiss on his cheek.
My heart cracked again. 'How the hell is that even possible?' Is it possible for your heart to break over and over again for the same person?
I exhaled and moved away from the glass, flattening out on the side of the building. My eyes closed and memories of the two of us filled the screen in my mind.
I heard the bell on the door ring and ignored it, turning to continue my walk when a voice caused me to take in a deep breath and stop instantly.
"Percy?" she questioned, the tone a mixture of anger and sadness.
Turning slowly, I met her confused, hurt, and angry gaze.
"Annabeth."
"What are you doing? Why the hell have you been following me?" She planted her feet and crossed her arms over her chest, letting me know she meant business.
"It wasn't intentional, I swear."
'Why on earth am I defending myself, I didn't do anything wrong?!'
"Really, because I noticed you several blocks back." Her breath formed small puffs of smoke in front of her as she shivered slightly.
"Where is your jacket? It's freezing out here Wise . . ." I caught myself from letting out the old nickname and her face softened for just a moment.
"That doesn't matter right now. I asked you a question, don't deflect with another one."
"I swear, I was just on a walk, not exactly sure where I was going. I just needed out of the house. I only noticed you a block back and well . . ."
A pregnant pause hung in the air as I was lost on what I was going to say.
"Well . . ." she trailed off, waiting for me to finish explaining.
"I wasn't exactly going to come running up to you and introduce myself to your new boyfriend. How awkward would that have been?" I gave her a crooked smile and she softened once again.
'God, I miss you.' I wanted to run up to her, pull her into my arms and bury my face in her neck. I missed how she felt, how she just fit perfectly up next to me and I had to look at the ground.
"I swear, nothing sinister here. I just really needed out of the house. I just let my feet guide me."
"I . . . I have to go."
I nodded at her and turned to take off once again.
"Goodbye Percy."
"Goodbye Annabeth," I returned quietly, not wanting to look back. I didn't want her to see the tears in my eyes.
The bells chimed again and I dodged into the first alley I came across. I pressed my back into the wall and hit my head against the bricks a couple of times.
Why was I having such a hard time getting over her? I dated Rachel before Annabeth and it didn't hurt this bad when we parted ways. Yes I missed her but not like this. Every bone in my body ached for Annabeth and it just threw me farther down the pit of despair.
The air swirled around me, making me shiver and just as I was about to shove myself off the wall and head home, her laughter swirled with the wind. Instead I remained in place and prayed they wouldn't see me hiding.
The pair darted across the street, holding hands and laughing as they headed toward the toy store. I knew who she was there for and I sighed. I even missed the little brats and hated that I had been ignoring her twin brothers' calls. It just didn't feel right to hang out with them while I was no longer with her.
I took that as my moment to break free of the wall and head back home. After all, there was a ball to prepare for later that I could not miss. The joys of being obligated to friends and your dead parents.
I turned over my shoulder to see them locked in a kiss and I nearly took off at a run.
'Yeah, you look happier, you do.'
'Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you
But ain't nobody love you like I do
Promise that I will not take it personal
Baby, if you're moving on with someone new.'
"Oh dear Percy! You look absolutely amazing."
"Thank you for the lie, Rachel. I appreciate it." I looked in the mirror. In all honesty, I didn't look half bad in the black tuxedo with the hunter green vest and tie. I was supposed to match with Annabeth's hunter green dress but since the breakup I doubted that she would even show up in the dress she so carefully picked out.
"To bring out the green in your eyes," she once told me as we were looking through magazines one evening.
'Maybe I should have coordinated with Rachel.'
"No lie. You are rather dashing tonight my friend." She moved toward me, stopping directly in front of me, examining every last inch, fiddling with the tie I haphazardly put on. "The only downfall . . . those bags under your eyes. When was the last time you slept?"
I shrugged and turned toward the mirror. "I get maybe two or three hours a night. I can't function like this anymore, Rachel. I don't know what to do."
I watched as she finished preening in another mirror. Tonight she was absolutely beautiful. Not that she wasn't before, but tonight, tonight she had a different air about her. Her usual bushy red curls had been straightened, her tresses now falling to the middle of her back. The dress she picked out was ice blue and form fitting on top, flowing into a pouf of tulle on the bottom. The top was the most amazing part of the dress with jewels all over from the waist up to the straps that crossed over her chest and then crossed over her back. It was so out of the norm for the woman who lived in denim and tee shirts as she made everything from pottery to paintings for the art gallery she owned.
"This never would have happened if you hadn't dumped me," she deadpanned, putting on mascara and making an odd face.
"Yeah, yeah, I have heard it before." I moved to the door, waiting for her to join me.
Minutes passed and she was finally at my side, her arm hooked in mine.
"I don't think I can do this, Rach. My chest is tight and my heart hurts," I whined.
"Completely normal," she replied calmly, pulling herself in front of me so that I could look at her. "You need to relax. You don't need to say anything unless you want to. I have everything covered. I just need you to be here. The school, after all, was left to you. I am just here to help you through all of this."
I nodded and looked at the top of her head. If I looked in her eyes I would break down and we didn't have time for that. The Winter Ball Fundraiser was about to start and I needed to keep my cool.
"Come on Perce. We have a ball to attend."
On the plus side, the ball room was flooded with bodies. The downside, the ball room was flooded with bodies. I wanted to escape but I needed to keep up my presence, converse and thank the donors to the school.
I felt like I had been making the rounds for hours when I looked at my watch to see that it hadn't even been an hour. I began to make my way to Rachel when I noticed she had stopped dead in her tracks, eyes looking past me.
'Don't turn around. Don't turn around you idiot!'
I did it. I turned around to see her looking more beautiful than ever. The air hitched in my lungs and I tried to look away but I couldn't pull my eyes from her.
She wore the hunter green dress and her date – God, she brought a damn date – was in just a plain black tuxedo. She definitely stood out next to him, which was probably his goal. It was hard to pull your eyes from her. The deep green dress was form fitting from the waist up leaving a slit through the middle just above her navel before becoming a bit wider at the base of her rib cage. The halter top left a little to the imagination but considering we had been intimate the last two years, it wasn't helping me any. The bottom of the dress hit the floor and moved around her in a swish of flowing satin and tulle, much the way Rachel's dress was made. You could hear the hushed whispers as she moved past throngs of people and I wondered if they were now figuring out that we were no long an item.
I could see her making her way to me and I turned to Rachel, panic across my face. I found myself thanking God in that moment, simply for the fact that Rachel could quickly assess a situation and move into action if need be. She did just that, calling us all to order and having us move to our tables for a five course meal.
"If I could have your attention," she called out after clapping several times, the room noise coming down to a soft whisper, "if you would all kindly take your places, dinner will be severed momentarily."
I quickly moved toward Rachel and she followed me to our seats. "Thank you for that."
"Not a problem. I could see the panic on your face and while you probably shouldn't have left her standing like that, I honestly don't blame you," she whispered, sitting as I pulled her chair out and then pushed it back in for her.
This night was going to be a disaster, I could feel it in my bones.
"Percy, do you have anything you would like to say before I begin?"
I looked out at the crowd of people and swallowed back the lump in my throat. "I just want to give every last one of you a massive thank you from the bottom of my heart. My mother . . . my mother and step father would be . . ." I turned slightly toward Rachel, trying to keep the tears at bay, ". . . would be so humbled and honored by your generosity, as am I." The tears were coming now and I wasn't sure just how in control I would be if I said any more.
She placed a hand on my arm and smiled up at me and looked back out at the crowd.
"I too, want to thank each and every one of your for being here tonight. This ball is in honor of Sally and Paul Blofis, two beautiful souls who left this world much too early. Sally left behind her world, her son Percy, who is still trying to come to terms with the passing of his mother and step-father. Please forgive him as I take over for the rest of the evening.
"Together they leave behind a much bigger world, Olympus Academy, a school for children struggling in a regular learning environment. Without your help this evening, the school would have had to close its doors at the end of the school term, leaving many children without the stable and caring environment they desperately need to succeed. Thanks to your kind and generous donations, the school will be able to prosper for another full two years."
Applause broke out among the throng of people as tears filled my eyes. My mother would have loved every last second of this and instead she was six feet under thanks to the carelessness of a drunk driver. I personally wasn't ready to run this school by myself and I had Annabeth's help in the beginning but Rachel quickly stepped in after the breakup.
My eyes scanned the room and instantly landed on her. She was beaming and nodded her head to her left and I sighed. I didn't want to talk to her right now. I didn't want the pain to take me over once again. I had hurt her enough as it was, I didn't need to add to it.
Rachel continued on for a few more minutes and finally I was able to excuse myself.
I followed her easily as the room seemed to part for us and finally she stopped in the foyer, where absolutely no one could see us.
"I just wanted to apologize for earlier today," she said quietly as I moved toward her.
I had to control myself or I would find myself pressed against her and that was probably the last thing she wanted. Hell, I doubt the new boyfriend wanted that as well.
"And we needed to be out here for you to say that?" My tone was brash and not all what I intended but it was so hard to be near her right now and I had no way of communicating that to her.
Her face hardened as the storm clouds rolled into her gray eyes. "I am just trying to be nice, Percy. There is no reason for you to be an asshole to me all of the time. Remember, you did this. Not me, you!"
"Do you really think I wanted things to end up this way? God Annabeth, I am sorry for every horrible things I have done since my mother passed. You don't know how hard this has been for me. I know you have tried and I pushed you away. I didn't mean to, but I did. You're gone now. You have someone else.
"I promise that I will not get in the way of whatever it is the two of you might have. I will not be the reason you are unhappy anymore."
Tears threatened to pour down my face but I wasn't going to let her see me cry.
"You have a chance to be happy now. Take it. Will he ever love you the way that I love you? I doubt it. I will always love you but like I said, I will not be the cause of your unhappiness. You deserve so much better than what I can give you."
Her face was wet, mascara running as tears poured down her cheeks. "I am sorry Percy. I just wanted . . . I just wanted to . . . God I don't even know what I wanted. I just wanted to know you were okay and I wanted to let you know that I still love you. I will always love you. You have been there for so much and you destroyed even more in such a short amount of time."
I wanted to hug her, to feel her warmth against my chest but I knew that wasn't going to happen. I needed to break ties with her if I was going to get out of this with my sanity.
"I love you, Annabeth. I always will love you and I'll be waiting here for you."
'Sat in the corner of the room
Everything's reminding me of you
Nursing an empty bottle and telling myself
You're happier, aren't you?'
I had been home for nearly two hours and yet I hadn't moved from the sofa other than to grab a beer from the fridge. 'This isn't me.'
My heart hurt, my eyes stung and yet I couldn't sleep. I couldn't function. Everything in the house reminded me of her. 'I need to move. You can't move you idiot you bought this house – yeah for her! Maybe I could just burn it down and start over. It wouldn't hurt so much.'
I stared at the Christmas tree, its lights twinkling ever so slightly as my eyes glazed over. I wanted nothing more than to be snuggled up with her right now. She calmed my weary heart, soothed my heavy soul.
There was a crack in the window behind the tree. I could see its thin fingers slowly making their way farther across the glass. My eyes closed and the scene around me changed.
~*October*~
Her arms were around my waist, her head plastered to my neck. The only thing keeping me calm at the moment was her steady breathing.
"This isn't fair Annabeth," I whined as tears pushed free.
"I know Percy," she whispered, her thumbs leaving small circles on my back. "I wish I could fix this."
Kissing the top of her head, I sighed and openly cried for the first time in the last two hours since finding out Mom and Paul were involved in a head on collision.
"When do you want to leave?"
I couldn't think about going down to the coroner's office right now despite the fact that I told them I would be there soon. I didn't want to have to identify the bodies of my mother and step-father. I didn't want to see them that way.
"Do we have to?" I sniffled on top of her head as I tried to regain control.
"Percy, you know we have to go, I wish to God we didn't but sadly we must." She never pulled her head from me as she spoke. She remained calm and stoic, my rock, my love and lifeline.
"I don't want to Annabeth. They know it's them, can't we leave it at that?"
"I wish it worked that way Percy."
"I just can't do this Annabeth! I shouldn't have to do this yet!" I couldn't help it but I yelled. I wasn't yelling at her and yet she flinched all the same.
"I will go. I am practically her daughter anyway and –"
"– the hell you will!" I pushed her away from me and gripped the back of the chair next to me, anger coursing through me.
"I didn't mean anything by it Percy," she pleaded softly, hands up as if raising the white flag.
Somewhere inside me a dam broke and a guttural growl escaped me as the chair I was gripping moments before went flying across the room. I noticed that Annabeth had moved back, talking to me calmly but I couldn't register a single word she was saying as I picked up several of the decorative wooden balls from the bowl on the dining table.
'Who the hell keeps glass and wooden balls anyway? And why on the dining table?'
The thought pierced my mind, angering me. It was stupid and childish but I needed a release and suddenly one of them went flying across the room followed quickly by another.
"Percy! Percy please stop," Annabeth screamed at me and I glared at her, tossing yet another ball into the kitchen. It hit the refrigerator with a satisfying yet sickening thud and I grabbed another ball.
"Percy, I am begging you!" She was desperate, pleading with me and trying to pull the ball from my hands.
I turned hard, knocking her hands away from me as I chunked the last ball into the living room. I heard it hit the window, the sound of the crack filling my ears and I finally collapsed to the ground, my face instantly buried in my hands.
"Shhhhhh Percy. I've got ya," she whispered in my ear and I screamed incoherently at her. "Perce, just cry on me baby," she pleaded as she tried to pull my hands free.
I slapped at her hands and shoved her away. "Stop it Annabeth, just stop it! I don't need you! Sometimes I really wish we had never met!"
"Don't say that Percy," she cried back at me, trying to keep her composure.
"I. Don't. Need. You!" I made sure to emphasize each word as I roared at her.
I didn't even recognize my own voice and suddenly it scared me. I wanted my mother. She was the only thing I could think of and the only person who could calm me at this moment. But I would never see her again. I would never have her blue cookies or blue pancakes on Christmas morning again. There would be no phone calls just to check in, no family dinners. She would never see me get married or get to know her grandchildren and as these thoughts plagued me, I allowed myself to finally collapse completely.
I could see that Annabeth was crouched down in front of me, trying desperately to help me through her tears and my greedy hands reached for her as I dropped my head in her lap and sobbed.
"I just want my mother back!"
"I know baby. I know," she whispered over me, her tears mingling with mine as we cried.
I wiped the tears from my eyes, flinging the empty bottle across the room, not looking or caring what it hit. 'Yup, that was the start of the downward spiral that landed me here. Way to go Jackson. Couldn't be man enough to suck it up and let her help you. Just had to be an asshole at every turn!'
My thoughts plagued me as I rose from the sofa and made my way to the kitchen, another beer was needed to help drown out my thoughts.
As I made my way back to the sofa I stopped dead in my tracks. All I could see was us, cuddled up together, my arm around her shoulders holding her close. And then another flash, Annabeth on the far end, legs stretched out and feet in my lap as she read. Now another, as she straddled my lap, smiling down at me as she slowly kissed various spots from my ear to my jaw.
"Knock it off man!" Shaking my head I pushed my way through the house and stopped once again as I crossed the threshold of my bed room.
More memories flooded my mind as I could see her perfect form walk from the bathroom, just a towel around her, her wet curls bouncing with every move as she smiled up at me. The next thing my mind showed me was her pressed against the wall directly across from me, eyes closed and hands pinned above her head as she allowed me to ravage her.
"Stop it, stop it, stop it," I cried. "I can't take it anymore!"
I threw myself into the bed face first, burying my head in the pillows and cried. I needed her so much and I ruined everything. It was too late to get her back, she found someone who made her happier.
'Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you
Ain't nobody need you like I do
I know that there's others that deserve you
But my darling, I am still in love with you.'
*Annabeth*
Slowly, I picked my head up from the table as another body sat down across from me.
"Did I get you up to early this morning, Blondie or some . . . thing?" The voice trailed off for a moment and then returned softly, "Dammit girl! You look like a hot damn mess!"
"Thank you, Thalia. I love your sorry ass too."
My head throbbed, eyes burned and threatened to release the tears I was desperately holding at bay. I hid my pain behind my cup of coffee, trying to protect myself from Thalia's questions.
"Do you want to explain?"
I pulled the cup from my lips, trying to avoid eye contact with my best friend. I wanted to tell her that things with Mark weren't fairing so well at the moment. Everything was great just after the break up with Percy and honestly, just before as well. He was there to listen to me cry as Percy pushed me farther and farther away and when Percy finally lost his temper and I left. Mark was there to pick up the pieces.
Now though, things were tense and every time Percy showed up where we were at, my heart ached and I knew Mark could see it on my face. I missed him. God help me, I miss my Seaweed Brain but I just can't be with someone who can't keep control of himself without physically hurting someone else.
"Do I sense trouble in paradise?" She crossed her arms over her chest, a smirk on her face as she leaned back into the booth.
"Do you have to be so damn cocky?" I shot back, placing the cup on the table and returning the gesture.
"You do know that a chunk of this is your fault right?" She raised an eyebrow at me, refusing to give up the smirk she wore when she knew she was right.
"How the hell is any of this my fault?"
"Don't give me that incredulous tone little missy. You know that you pushed him –"
"– Into talking to me for crying out loud! He wouldn't tell me anything, Thalia! I had no idea what was going through his mind. I couldn't help if he –"
"– He wouldn't what? He told you what he needed Annabeth! He told you he needed space and that he needed you to back off!"
I slammed my hands on the table, leaning forward, glaring at my best friend. How dare she throw all of this at me.
She never skipped a beat as she continued on, "You know damn well that he needed you to back off. He would have come to you when he was ready. That was his mother Annabeth, his MO-TH-ER!"
"You don't think I realize that? Sally was more of a mother to me than my own mother! I can't even tell you how bad my heart aches, how much I want to call her and I can't because she is gone. I –"
"– You can't make this about you! Oh dear God Annabeth, this is Percy's mother. Not yours. Yes Sally was there for you, hell she was there for me as well but you can't put your needs above Percy's."
"I . . . I didn't . . . I . . ." For the first time in my life I was at a complete loss for words and Thalia was absolutely right. The sudden realization of this brought my tears forward and I allowed them to fall. I hated to admit when Thalia was right and even more so when I was wrong.
"Aaannnd now you get it!" She let out an exasperated sigh and leaned forward on the table, elbows down, hands up and she signaled for me to come to her.
"I am such an idiot," I whined, leaning toward her.
"Yes you are. But you are my beautiful, curly q, blonde headed idiot and I can forgive you for putting me in such a shitty position," she whispered sweetly, putting her forehead against mine and stroking my loose curls.
"I screwed up," I cried weakly, "I screwed up bad Thals. I can't fix this!"
She kissed my forehead and pulled away from me quickly. "You're lucky you have me. You don't have to do anything. From the looks of you when I sat down, Mark looks like he will do enough damage that you won't actually have to do anything. Are you even happy with that Gym Rat?"
"Be nice Thals," I sniffled, blowing my nose in a tiny napkin.
"Annabeth, we all know he is totally not your type. How the hell did you even end up with him?"
I looked Thalia over, remembering the girl I grew up with, her short midnight locks always sticking up much like Percy's and her electric blue eyes always looking like they could send you to your grave in an instant. She never made much sense to me then but in the moment, the tables had turned and the fact that Thalia Grace had made complete sense to me, had my mind reeling.
'What was I doing with Mark? How the hell did this even happen? Because you are a selfish idiot Annabeth, that's how this happened!'
I shrugged my shoulders. "I am an idiot. That's how this happened."
"Yes, we know this already. Let's move on. We have other things to discuss and I don't have a whole lot of time left before Rachel gets here to go over Olympus Academy with you. I personally, do not want to be here for any of that."
She wiped the tears from my eyes as I rolled them at her, "Yes, I know. That irrational fear of numbers and the soul sucking ginger. I will never understand your beef with Rachel."
"And I will never understand your being so okay with your ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend."
I needed to change the subject. I had nothing against Rachel, but something happened during Percy and Rachel's relationship that Thalia had an issue with and I could never get an answer out of anyone as to what happened. I figured it was best to just leave it alone.
I snapped my fingers in her face, "Focus, focus!"
"Huh? Oh right!"
"So, what is this big news?"
"Nico's gay –" "
"–News Thalia. You said news! We all already know this about Nico –" "
"– If you wouldn't interrupt me, we wouldn't have this problem!" She rolled her eyes at me, raising an eye brow, asking, are you done yet?
Waving a hand, I urged her on while sipping on my coffee once again.
"Anyway, Will came to me last night. He wants to propose to Nico on New Year's Eve."
Now she had my full attention, so much so that I actually choked on my coffee.
"Are you serious?"
"Dead," she replied leaning forward. "He knows that Nico still hasn't officially come out to us yet so he wants's to keep the proposal just him and Nico. I really want to do something special for them though and he said he was going to propose to him under the big tree below my balcony. It's their secret meeting spot."
"Not much of a secret," I replied, a smile playing on my lips as I carefully took another sip.
"Exactly! I have a ton of party poppers for the ball drop, I want to pop them off at them after Nico says yes!"
My brow furrowed, "Do you really think we should be butting in like that?"
"Do you think Will would have told me if he wasn't expecting some sort of surprise?"
"You have a point," I sighed, leaning back and looking at my watch. Rachel would be here in about fifteen minutes.
"I have one issue with this plan."
"Oh," an eyebrow raised as I tried to remain calm, "and what might that be?" Honestly, I knew what the issue was going to be and I stupidly asked.
"You know damn well the issue is Percy. He was supposed to propose to you on Christmas Eve and you went and screwed that up." I was about to interrupt her but she put a finger out and shook it at me, "Uh, uh. Don't you dare. Back on topic. How the hell are we supposed to pull something like this off without depressing him even more? I know he will hate us if we don't include him but I don't want to see him moping anymore than he already is over the next week."
I closed my eyes, thumbs pressing into my temple as I tried to think. "What if . . ." I trailed off, my mind trying to wrap around the thought of Percy proposing to me. I would have said yes. I would have said yes and made a complete fool of myself but I would have done anything for him. "What if we just leave him out of the loop completely? When he gets to the party, shove a popper in his hand and just make him tag along. He will figure out what is going on eventually. It will be easier on him in the moment, rather than giving him time to wallow over the whole situation, which will also get back to Nico. You know he can't hide squat from that boy anyway."
Thalia looked down at her watch and then back up at me. "I guess that will have to work. I will text you later with the full details then. I need to clear some things up with Will and we can go from there."
I kept my eyes glued to the table. I didn't, no couldn't look up at her right now. There was too much pain and too much resemblance to Percy.
"You know he's waiting for you?"
"Percy?" I asked quietly, "Yeah, I know. He told me would wait forever."
"No, Mark," she answered, nodding her head in the direction of the front window of the café.
A sad sigh escaped me. There would be another fight over this one. I was tired of fighting. It seemed like all I had been doing since October was fighting with everyone, including myself and I was beyond done.
"I gotta run Blondie. I will talk to you later, okay?"
I finally glanced up, her eyes were sad, like she knew what was coming for me later and she leaned over and hugged me.
"Okay," I said quietly, returning the hug. Thalia pulled away quickly, glancing at her watch once again but I grabbed her hand. "Hey Thal, I really am sorry."
"I know you are. We'll talk later," and like that she was gone, leaving me to my thoughts which threatened to drown me in tears.
'He was going to propose.'
The thought ran over and over in my mind like a broken record.
'How could I have been so selfish? We would have had the best Christmas ever and I ruined it.'
I dropped my head into my hands and forced myself to will away any thoughts of Percy. Suddenly I was angry at Mark. Percy never would have spied on me and again, I am in this situation because of Percy. Everything comes back to Percy!
'Stop this Annabeth. You are better than this! Pull it together before Rachel gets here. There is just too much work to do and no time for these foolish games. Worry about this later! BUT. HE. WAS. GOING. TO. PROPOSE!'
I did the only thing I could think of in the moment and cried for everything I allowed myself to lose.
*Percy*
I walked into the coffee shop with a box in hand, full of my mother's notes and ideas for Olympus Academy. On my back, all of the payroll and print outs that Rachel told me I needed to bring. My mood was okay for the time being, despite being in one of Annabeth's favorite places.
Across the small café, a hand raised and I spotted Rachel, talking easily with someone as she waved me over. As I got closer, I froze. Blonde curls rested on the woman's shoulders and I glared at Rachel.
"Hey Percy," Rachel called lightly. "Don't look at me like that. We have work to do and I need her to help us."
Annabeth turned around, a deep blush invading her cheeks and neck and I sighed. I wasn't angry at her, I just wish she would have told me so I could have found an excuse to not be here right now.
Rachel began pushing herself out of the booth and looked directly up at me as she spoke, "Look, I need a cup of coffee and to make a quick phone call. You two talk because if we can't be civil I will beat you both."
It was a warning. I knew it all too well. She wanted me to behave and get over myself. 'Well played Rachel, well played.'
I dropped the box on the table and rolled my eyes at her as I dropped onto the bench. I kept glancing back at Annabeth, only to see she refused to pull her eyes from the table.
"Hello Percy." Her voice was so quiet I had to strain to hear her.
"Hello Annabeth." I wasn't sure what else to say to her other than 'I miss you.'
She glanced up at me, her eyes wide, tears lining the brims.
"Shit, did I say that out loud?"
She simply nodded at me and dropped her eyes back to the table.
I dropped my head to the table, I started, I may as well finish.
"Perc –"
"–Annabeth," I cut in and she immediately stopped. I did that to her. Before my mother passed and I lost my damn mind, she never would have stopped. She would have finished her thought and smiled at me. Now she was staring at her hands on the table. "Finish."
She shook her head, "No, you first."
"I am sorry."
"Oh, for what?"
"Please don't play coy with me Annabeth. I am trying here. I really am."
She looked up at me, almost offended that I even suggested such a thing.
"God, I never meant to tear you down. I never meant to make you cry. We spent thirteen years of our lives together in some form or another. Being with you was just right. I know I ruined it all. The fact that they passed was no excuse for my terrible behavior. I've been working on it though."
She sighed heavily, storm clouds rolling into her gray orbs.
'There's my girl. I knew she was still in there somewhere.'
"Why Percy? Why did you push me away?"
I shrugged and clasped my hands together. "I don't know. I think because part of me thought it was easier if there was just no one to love. No disappointment and no worry of having to go through what I went through with Mom and Paul."
"I wish you would have talked to me. I tried so hard to make you talk to me."
"I know you did, and ultimately that was what made me push you away more. I needed time. I needed to figure out . . . I don't know what I needed to figure out but your constant pressuring me to talk to you broke me even more."
"I am sorry, I didn't know that I was such a burden to you during your time of need," she spat at me, acid laced in every word.
"Annabeth, don't be like that. I am talking to you now. I am trying to be open and honest with you, everything you wanted and that I couldn't give you at the time."
She glared at me again, her eyes now the color of gun metal and I knew she was on the verge of completely blowing up at me. I needed to stop her before she had the chance.
"I love you Beth." She shook her head and backed away at the use of the old nickname that I knew she hated but let me get away with. "I will always love you and I will always hate myself for ruining everything we had."
"You can't just say you love me Percy."
"I can and I will. I will always love you. I will tell you that until I am blue in the face. Even if you marry someone else. I will always remind you that I love you more. You are my world. You are my everything. You always have been. It has always been you." Tears were threatening to make their way down my cheeks but somehow I managed to keep them away.
Moving my hands forward, I could now feel the warmth coming off of her and slowly I inched even further until my hands rested on top of hers. She tensed for a moment, pulling her hands back slightly but eventually she relaxed and left them under mine.
The storm clouds were rolling out and her features softened slightly.
"You know . . . that last day, the one I left was absolutely the worst day of my life."
"I know and I am sorry," I whispered.
I felt her thumb move under my hand and then it quickly stopped. "You hurt me Percy. I can't forgive that. Not right now."
"Annabeth, I never meant to hurt you like that! I swear to God, it was an accident."
She sighed heavily. "Percy, you physically hurt me. I know you are sorry but how do I forgive and forget that?"
"I don't know. I just know that you pushed too hard and I fought back. It was a reflex and shoving you into the wall was never supposed to happen. I would never lay a hand on you and you know that."
"But you did Percy. You shoved me into the wall, you left bruises on my back from where I hit the frame."
Shame suddenly overcame me as I turned my head away, tears finally falling. My rage at that time took over and there was absolutely no excuse for what I did to her but I also wasn't totally to blame but I would take it if it meant I could get her back.
"How do I know that you would never lay a hand on me again?" Her voice shook, tears rimmed her eyes and my heart broke all over again.
"Therapy. I have been going for the last three weeks. Nico forced me to go but apparently I have been making some progress, at least according to the therapist."
"I . . . I don't . . ." She trailed off, looking everywhere but at me.
"If you went with me, you would see Annabeth. You would know that I didn't mean it. That everything came to a head and you just happened to be there when I completely exploded." I moved my hands and found myself holding hers like we used to and a tingle when up my arms.
"I miss us, I miss you. I need you. Remember, I love you. I know you are happier right now, and I am fine with that, actually I have to be fine with that. But if you ever want me back, you know where I will be. I will wait forever if I have to."
Tears left salty rivers on her cheeks and suddenly I needed to leave. I couldn't be here with her. I wanted to comfort her but she wasn't mine to comfort anymore.
"I have to go. Tell Rachel I am sorry and that I couldn't do this right now. I appreciate your help on this and I will get out of your hair. You don't need me here for this and I am just a distraction anyway. I love you Beth."
I dropped the backpack in the box as I stood and glanced back at her one last time. She truly was beautiful and my heart flipped and then sunk as I knew she wouldn't be coming home to me tonight.
I raced out of the coffee shop, passing Rachel by the door.
"Percy! Wait, Percy, come back!"
I ignored her as I took off at a run toward my car. 'Not now Red, I just can't.'
'But I guess you look happier, you do
My friends told me one day I'd feel it too
I could try to smile and hide the truth
I know I was happier with you.'
"Come on Percy, cheer up."
I looked up at my cousin and wished that it was that easy.
"We can't be depressed forever you know." I glared up at him as he continued, "Well, I can. I mean look at me. I have the depressed emo thing down pat."
I cracked a small smile as I looked him over, "Look at you Nico, cracking jokes. I didn't know you had it in you."
His shoulders shrugged and his long black hair fell in his face, covering the smile he tried so desperately to hide. "I surprise everyone, I don't know why, I am quiet enjoyable to be around."
"Yeah, once you can crack that dark exterior. Let's face it Nico, you have been King of the Shadows since Bianca died." He stiffened next to me and I knew I hit a soft spot with him and I didn't care, I continued on anyway, "That was twelve years ago man and here you are telling me I can't be depressed forever!"
"I was talking about Annabeth! But you know, thanks for bringing that all up. Cos you know, holidays aren't hard enough as it is."
I blushed and fell back into the sofa. "Sorry man. Thought you were talking about mom."
Nico pushed back into the base of the sofa and looked up at me sadly, "You know she will be here tonight."
I leaned forward, elbows on my knees and tried to ignore his last statement.
"I don't understand what happened between the two of you. I thought everything was perfect?"
"I don't even understand what happened, why the hell do you think I am at the therapist?!"
"Do you ever understand anything that goes on around you anyway?"
"Ah, look at you, there's another one! Now, knock it off before I am forced to beat the crap out of you. And why did you even have to bring up the fact that she would be here tonight?"
"Because, you needed to know so that you could possibly make a quick exit. The new boyfriend is coming as well."
"How do you even know all of this?" I stood up and moved toward the window that looked out over the city.
"Thalia informed me. You know we are supposed to be setting up anyway. She's going to be pissed when she walks in here and sees that we haven't done squat to help with the annual Christmas party."
"Yeah, well she can get her panties all out of that bunch, I am brooding and doing a pretty damn good job at it too."
Nico rolled his eyes at me and chucked a pillow at my head. "Come one man. We just need to get through a couple of hours."
"Why do you keep saying we? What are you up to?"
"Nothing. Just trying to help a cousin out is all."
"Yeah right, you are up to something and I will figure it out."
I could have sworn I heard him say 'I was too dense to get it' under his breath but I let it slide. Thalia was going to have to our asses when she walked through that door and I decided that getting to work was a much safer option for the time being.
"Alright, everyone gather around, it's time for the White Elephant!"
I had to clap my hands over my ears as Thalia yelled next to me. This was the portion of the evening I usually looked forward to but this year was different. I didn't have Annabeth to play the game with me, stealing gifts and laughing with her arms comfortably around me as we played.
The room settled but only slightly as everyone made their way toward the living room, spreading around the room in a large circle. The only one who looked out of place was Annabeth's new boyfriend, Mark.
All night, I did my best to avoid them and I wasn't doing half bad. In fact, for the first time in almost two months, I had a genuine smile on my face. Now though, now was going to be hard as Mark sat down on the sofa directly across from me. I tried not to stare as Annabeth sat in his lap, only to be deposited moments later in the seat next to him. Her eyes gave her away and I could tell that there was trouble in her new paradise.
Nico nudged me and leaned in, "Whenever you are ready to leave man, just let me know."
"I think I can make it," I replied weakly. As much as it pained me to see her with him, knowing that things weren't exactly hunky dory at the moment made my heart just ever so slightly better.
"Give it up Seaweed Brain. They are fine, just having issues over you being here," Thalia whispered in my ear as she sat down on the other side of me.
"God! Knock it off Pinecone Face!" My voice was a little louder than intended and I heard a chortle on the other side of the room. I looked up to see Annabeth trying to remain calm as Mark gave her the side eye.
Thalia glared at me but pulled a hat from the side of the stack of presents in the middle of the floor. "So, for those of you who don't know what White Elephant is I shall explain. The game is pretty simple. Every present that is in the middle is numbered. Those same numbers are in the hat. We will pass this around and then start with one and so on down the line. Now, here comes the fun part. Each gift may be stolen only three times. So, for example, Annabeth opens gift number one, she will not get the chance to steal until the very end but she may be stolen from by anyone who opens after her. So, now that we know the rules, let's get started!"
We couldn't have been more than fifteen minutes into the game before I felt the overwhelming urge to just leave. I tensed in my spot, not even noticing the gag gift of a blow up doll that I just unwrapped. I heard my friends and family laughing around me and I was sure I plastered a fake smile on my face and murmured about the terrible gift but I couldn't keep my eyes off of her and Mark took notice.
He made sure I knew that she was his, that I had lost and that he was going to be the one to be with her. I wasn't even sure where she met the monstrosity of a man at. You could tell he was a definite gym rat and that steroids could have possibly been involved in his physique. What Annabeth saw in him I would never know but the fact that he had a hand on her upper thigh and kept kissing her neck, ear and jawline constantly was making my anxiety soar.
"You alright man?" Nico leaned over and whispered, being as nonchalant as possible.
"Yeah, I just need some fresh air," I whispered back. "Don't anyone steal my present while I am gone, I will be back in a few," I joked as I stood and made a beeline toward Thalia's spare bedroom.
No one said a word and just let me go and all I could do was thank God. The last thing I wanted to do was ruin Thalia's annual party and I definitely didn't want to give Gym Rat Mark the satisfaction of knowing that he chased me off from my only remaining family at the most important time of the year.
Opening the sliding glass door to the balcony instantly made me feel better as the wind slammed into my face. My heartrate slowed as I leaned on the railing. Someone touched my shoulder and I nearly jumped out of my skin and over the railing.
"Dammit Nico! Warn a person!"
"Sorry. Look man, I know you needed to get away from them. It will get easier. I promise it will."
"Thanks for the words of encouragement, but I think I just need to brood again."
"I just want you to know you will have that again. Just let things take their course."
"Thanks," I said with a nod as I looked back out over the city. The view was relaxing and I never even noticed that I was alone once again.
Time didn't seem to matter while I was out here and as I pushed myself back to standing, I bumped into yet someone else behind me.
"Sorry, I thought I was alone out here."
"You're fine Percy."
I knew that voice anywhere. I heard it every day for the last thirteen years of my life minus the last two months, give or take.
"I just wanted to check on you. You have been out here a while."
"I'm fine. Just needed some air," I replied as I moved to go back inside.
She stopped me though, placing a hand on each shoulder. She leaned in on tip toe and left a kiss on my cheek. "Merry Christmas Perce."
Tears gleamed in her eyes and it took ever last bit of me not to kiss her back.
"I need to get back before people wonder. Take your time. Be in the right frame of mind before you come back."
I nodded at her and smiled weakly as she turned and left me standing in the doorway perplexed as to what the hell just happened. At this rate, I was going to be lucky if my sanity held out to New Years.
'Baby, you look happier, you do
I knew one day you'd fall for someone new
But if he breaks your heart like lovers do
Just know that I'll be waiting here for you.'
The last two weeks left me reeling in more ways than one. I couldn't get Annabeth off of my mind and I was literally driving myself crazy, hoping and praying I would see her again.
The doorbell rang and I was pulled from thoughts as I ran to get the door.
"Let's go . . . and you look way too happy. What the hell happened?"
"Nothing."
"Yeah, you can't just say nothing with a smile like that on your face. So what gives?"
"I had a decent therapy session for once."
"This has nothing to do with therapy. I will get it out of you sooner or later."
"Speaking of looking happy, Mr. Gloom and Doom, what the hell is that look on your face for?"
"Nothing. It's just going to be an interesting night is all."
I rolled my eyes. I was getting tired of Nico being a little vague here lately but this time of year we usually just let him be. It was easier than fighting with the scrawny jerk and usually he came back and apologized for the shitty attitude right after he was done brooding. This attitude though, it was new and it was a bit worrying. "What are you hiding?"
"Nothing, Perce, I swear. Now let's go."
Rolling my eyes again – I did that a lot around my little cousin – I followed the young man out to his car, a small little black number that I couldn't even tell you what make and model. I forced myself into the front seat and prayed for a quick arrival to Thalia's as the space in the car left my knees jammed into the glove box and my head almost pressed to the roof.
"You know, the seat moves back and lowers. I mean you have been in a car before haven't you?"
Nico shot a grin in my direction as I tried not to kill the little smart ass. I made the seat a little more comfortable for my height but it still wasn't enough to kill the claustrophobic feeling I had settling over me.
Thankfully it was a short trip and I hopped out of the car faster than Nico could put it in park and shut it off.
"Dude, could you at least let me get in the parking spot before you try to dive out of the vehicle?"
"What's the fun in that?"
"There is seriously something wrong with you."
"Tell me something I didn't already know."
Nico huffed next to me and kicked a rock at his feet. "There's a lot you don't know!"
"Shut up! I am going up to Thalia's now. She isn't as mean to me as you are. Enjoy hanging in the shadows Skeleton King! By the way, I will figure out what the hell it is you're up to. I mean if you planned on coming out tonight, psh no biggie," I called back at him as I made my way up the stairs toward Thalia's third floor apartment. "We've all known since you were fourteen!"
"Uh huh – wait . . . what?" He looked up at me as I hit the first landing and even in the dark I could see the murderous gaze in his eyes. It actually made me shiver but at the same time I knew how worried he was about coming out to the family.
He had always been the black sheep of the group, even more so than Jason and his blonde hair that stood out from a mile away. We all knew that he was worried about what other people thought, which is why we always kept him protected under our wing while I still poked fun from time to time.
"You better keep your damn mouth shut Perseus Jackson! I know where you sleep!"
"No worries, your secret is safe with me," I called back down to him from the third floor, "and Thalia, and Jason and Annabeth." There was a growl from down below and I couldn't help but smile. "I love you too Skeleton King!"
I made it into Thalia's apartment with a smile on my face. I was not going to let anything ruin my night. Things would get better and I will be okay without her. I just had to keep reminding myself that I would be okay without her.
Before I made it into the living room, I was bombarded by Thalia, a mess of black hair and electric blue eyes, wild with excitement.
"Didn't you come with Nico?" She questioned almost crazed.
"Of course. He's lurking out in the shadows, a little too happy for my liking and upset that we know he's gay."
"Dammit Percy!"
"What?" I questioned innocently as I followed her into the living room.
"Just shut up, grab some of those confetti poppers on the table and come with me."
She was being vague tonight and a vague Thalia was never a safe one to be around.
We passed by Annabeth and the Gym Rat and I had to calm myself. 'You are good, you don't need her. You will make it without her.' Moments later, I could smell her citrus body spray and knew she was coming with us, out to wherever Thalia was leading me.
Suddenly, I was squished between Thalia and Annabeth on the main back balcony, with her brother Jason and his wife Piper on one side, and our friends Frank, Hazel and Reyna on the other.
"What the hell is going on? What are the damn poppers for?"
I got an elbow to the ribs on both sides of me, one from Thalia and one from Annabeth as they both shushed me into silence and looked down into the courtyard below us. Just like old times. 'I say this like it's been ages or something when in reality, what two months now? Get a grip Jackson!'
My eyes adjusted to the dark and down below I could get a glimpse of Nico moving out from the shadows, waiting impatiently for something or someone. Seconds seemed to pass like hours as we all waited on baited breath and yet I felt like I was the only one who had no clue what was going on.
And then it happened. Another man stepped out of the shadows and embraced my baby cousin. Annabeth and Thalia got antsy next to me and I looked down to see our friend Will talking to Nico, carefully moving his hair out of his face as he did so. So this is what they were all waiting for and this was a moment I felt like we were all intruding on. Yes I liked to tease Nico but this was special and here we were about to ruin it. Or maybe I just didn't want to be in on the moment because this was the night I had planned to ask Annabeth to marry me. That plan was gone now and maybe one day I would be able to ask her but that was a fat chance in hell.
"Thalia, I don't know how you found out about this but we are about to ruin a special moment for Nico," I hissed in her ear.
"Don't worry about how I found out, just get ready!"
I looked down once again to see Will, now on one knee and a small box in his hand. "Oh holy shit! He's proposing," I let out in a harsh whisper, only to be nailed by Annabeth ten times harder than before.
I wanted to yell at her, 'what the hell was that for' and continue the banter but I couldn't ruin the moment anymore than we were already about to, so I kept my mouth shut and watched.
Nico stopped for a moment and then threw himself at Will in a hug that took them both to the ground. Then the poppers went off around me and I immediately followed suit, watching as the confetti dropped to the happy couple below.
Screams of 'congratulations' filled the air as Nico flipped the bird up at us as he leaned in and kissed Will lightly on the lips, tilted his head up toward us and shouted, "I hate you Thalia!" He was stopped by one more kiss from Will, only to look back up at us with a smile on his face, "But thank you!"
*Annabeth*
"Mark, stop it!" I tried to keep my voice steady but he was in a mood tonight.
"Stop what? I'm not doing anything?"
"You are being a complete and utter ass," I retorted, pulling my arm out of his grip.
"Excuse me? I am not the one being thrown together with the ex constantly!"
"Could you lower your voice?"
"Why, so your precious friends don't hear us fight?"
I grabbed Mark by the arm and pulled him out of the living room and toward the room I used when I stayed here. I quietly shut the door behind me and let go of his arm, pushing him a safe distance away from me.
"I want to know what your problem is without the screaming and the fighting. Just talk to me."
He glared at me for several beats and then his expression softened. "I am tired of having to compete with him, Annabeth. You have to know that."
"Compete how? There is no competition, Mark. He hurt me, I mean he physically hurt me. I can't trust him."
"You say that so easily, but I see the way you look at him. I see the way he looks at you!"
I sat down on the edge of the bed. My head was starting to hurt. The New Year was coming and this was supposed to be a night of fun and now a celebration for Nico and Will. 'Should have been one for you too you big dummy!' The thought never left my mind and plagued me over and over since Thalia told me a little over a week ago.
"You aren't happy, Annabeth. I can see it all over your face."
I glared up at Mark, "I'm not happy because you keep trying to show Percy up. I have already told you to lay off and that there is nothing going on there."
"I don't know that!" There was a whine to his voice and I cringed internally.
"How the hell can you not know that?. I come home to you every night!"
"That doesn't mean anything Annabeth."
I crossed my arms over my chest and stood, pacing the length of the bed as my mind went into overdrive. "Oh, like you spying on me doesn't mean anything? I know you have been following me around. Where is the trust?"
"There would be a hell of a lot more of it if you cut him out."
"Wow. I . . . You . . ." I stopped pacing so that I could try to gather my thoughts. "You do realize that . . . you know what, never mind! We are going to go out there, be cordial to everyone and then we will discuss this at home. This is not the place to discuss our issues! Can you agree to that?"
Mark glared at me, his baby blues cold and calculating. "You can bet your ass we will discuss this when we get home."
He moved to the door and I had to grab his hand, "You have to stop making issues that aren't there!"
"Annabeth, the only issue is that you are far to close with your ex. Had you been in my shoes earlier, watching the group as you leaned over that rail together . . . you just left me out."
I placed a hand on his cheek and he pulled away just slightly before sighing and leaning in. "I told you, it was a delicate situation and you didn't even know that Nico was gay until I told you. We have known since he was fourteen but he didn't know that we knew."
"You know, I am not even going to try and understand all of that right now. Just stay away from Percy, Annabeth."
"And you behave yourself! Don't make him feel any worse than my being here is already doing."
"Stop worrying about what upsets him!"
I yanked my hand from his cheek and waited for him to open the door. Mentally, I was now done. I missed my Seaweed Brain. I needed him right now but I was going to go out there and keep the peace. I would do what Mark asked and tomorrow we would fix this once and for all. I needed out of the rebound.
"Well, are you going to go?"
A groan escaped him and he practically threw himself out into the hallway and back to the party. I released my own, plastered a fake smile on my face and did my best to avoid Percy the rest of the night.
*Percy*
"Well, I guess you were right on this evening being interesting," I exclaimed to Nico as we prepared for the ball dropping in thirty minutes.
"Ain't that the damn truth," he said quietly. Since making his way upstairs he was a bit more quiet and reserved than usual, only coming out of the shadows at Will's request.
Nico nudged me in the ribs and then cleared his throat. "Dude, quit staring at her. Mark is creeping me out with that glare he keeps giving you."
"I can't help it. I honestly thought I could handle this, that things were getting better but every time I see her, it hurts. Like physically makes me hurt." I put a hand on my chest and tapped it several times absentmindedly.
"I wish I could help you Percy, I really do. But right now, the best I can do for you is tell you to quit staring. I think the Gym Rat could easily kill you."
"I'm not afraid of the Gym Rat."
"You probably should be," he replied, pushing himself off the wall and making his way toward Will. "Work on that."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever." I watched as the pair made their way to the dining room and I took this as my chance to disappear for a little bit. I made my way back to Thalia's spare room and sat down on the bed, watching the lights from the city beyond the window.
I was relishing in the quiet when her voice flitted across my ears. Shaking my head I tried to ignore her but her tone caused me to stand straight and listen carefully as I moved slowly toward the door.
"Stop it Mark. Just stop it!"
"Annabeth, I'm just tired of feeling like I don't matter."
"You know that isn't the case and this isn't the place to discuss this matter. We already had this talk, remember?" I heard her hiss next to the door.
"How do I know that isn't the case? You two sure are thrown together a lot at these gatherings. You can't stop looking at him."
"Oh bull shit! I haven't looked at him since we walked out of this room! If he is looking, I wouldn't know. You were supposed to stop trying to make him feel like shit!"
There was a pregnant pause and then his voice got softer, "Why the hell is he even at these damn things anyway? Doesn't he have family to be with?"
My heart dropped as I stepped outside the door and moved toward their voices. From my angle I could see Thalia moving in behind him but I was faster.
"How dare you!"
"Excuse me?" Mark questioned incredulously.
"You heard me. Thalia, Nico and Jason are the only family I have left you asshole! I don't have the luxury of just going to see my parents for the holidays anymore and even if I did, they would be here!"
Annabeth stepped between the pair of us and turned toward me, "Percy, back off. It's not worth the fight."
I pushed past her gently, not wanting to hurt her but she grabbed an arm and tried to pull me back. Thalia stepped up, grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back as I got up in Mark's face, "I haven't seen my father since I was year and half. My mother and step father died in a car wreck back in October. I see my uncle's once a year if I am lucky. That girl back there, her brother and Nico are it for me. Do you understand that? We are a package deal. The girl behind me, the one that Thalia is holding back, she comes with that crazy raven headed heathen. Another package deal. We have been a group since we were twelve years old. You come in and think that a month or two with Annabeth is going to just make me disappear? I will always be here. Every party, every holiday, every birthday, I will be here because we are family. If you have a problem with that, I suggest you not come to any more of our little shindigs."
Mark's face was beet red as he tried to read me. I pushed up on him a little more and he didn't budge. I didn't figure he would but I had to try. "Now, if you don't mind I am going to go back to sulking."
"Percy," Annabeth's voice pleaded with me, "stop hiding."
"Let him go Annabeth. It is easier to enjoy the party when he isn't staring at you!"
"Oh dear God Gym Rat! Get over yourself! My house, my rules and if someone wants to stare at someone, you learn to deal with it or get the hell out! It as simple as that."
My cousin was in fine form tonight but I didn't have a desire to be a part of any of the drama that was going on out here. I said my peace and I simply wanted to get back to the quiet of the bedroom.
Spinning on my heel, I marched back to the room and slammed the door but not before I heard Thalia, "I'm watching you asshole!"
I found a smile for a brief moment.
I sat on the balcony in one of the small chairs for I wasn't even sure how long. The group, my family, they knew to leave me be right now. They knew I needed time. Really what I needed was her. I needed her arms around me and I needed her to tell me everything would be alright.
Had things turned out differently, that would have been me proposing to Annabeth tonight. That was always my goal. 'No time to be sorry Percy. Just wait it out. Things will get better.'
The lights in the distance flickered and from my vantage point I could see the ball in Time Square beginning to drop as my family counted down the seconds to the New Year. Somewhere in the noise I heard the front door slam but I ignored it all as I watched the ball make it's descent.
I pulled myself from the chair and leaned over the railing, wishing I could smile with the rest of the world.
'A new perfect Percy. Just make a new perfect.'
The door creaked slightly but once again, I ignored the sound. The sight before me was all I could concentrate on. Soft footsteps padded in my direction and I sighed.
The ball dropped below the city line and I stood up straight counting down quietly to the wind, "Five, four, three, two, one."
A hand found mine and then her soft voice filled the air, "What was the last thing you told me?"
"I'll be waiting here for you," I returned, leaning into her side as the fireworks exploded around us.
It has been a while...sorry. Life and all.
This one was inspired but the wonderful Ed Sheeran and his song 'Happier'. Just put it on repeat as you read. Trust me!
I want to thank 3 for being my beta on this one. Girl, thank you for helping with the insanity on this! Love ya!
Hope you all enjoyed and there will be a follow up to this and yes another Ed song, sorry not sorry, but I hope that you did enjoy this one or that it at least tugged at the heart strings a little bit. So until next time - and I promise that it wont be as long of a wait!