Hey! So, before reading the first chapter of the story, I'd just like to say that I'm new at this thing of fanfics. I wrote lots of stories but up until now I've only published one of them all and OTH is something difficult to write about! LOL.
As you all know, I'm a Naley addict, I love them 100% and as all Naley lovers, I hated season 5. That all storyline with Crappy Carrie (sweet nickname) was just awful and oh so ugh! But I actually think that the entire Nathan crisis in the first episodes of the season would have been a great storyline for Nathan/ Haley and Jamie. Because face it, it would be powerful (you all know it was powerful and we've only seen 4/5 episodes about that) and Joy and James totally rocked at it. So, and therefore, I thought: what if Nathan had never changed after Haley's ultimatum? "One more night like this, Nathan, and I promise you you will have nothing!" What would have happenned? This is my story, this is my AU Naley season 5. Hope you enjoy it!
"Bonus Track": No Nanny Carrie!!
Four months. Haley had never thought this would happen. She expected this from everybody. But not Nathan. Not the man she loved. Not the man she'd married. Not the only man to whom she gave her heart deliberately, completely and unconditionally. Not the man who was the father of her child. Not the man that promised he'd always be there for her, who'd always protect her. Not the man that every single day said that he loved her. Not the man that made her the happiest woman in this entire planet. Four months. Haley just figured that's how long it takes to Nathan lose himself. Lose the man he used to be. Lose the man she loved.
I said I don't need your help! It's already hard for me to see me like this! Just go away!
She heard them. She heard the echos of four months full of the same mindless speech. She dunk her head on the pillow. She wanted it to stop. It was too much pain for her to handle.
I bet you're thinking how I'm such a loser. You are, aren't you?
She looked at the clock. 2:30 am. The bed was so huge without him. But she would never get used to it. That bed. That same bed where he told her while making love to her that he could not live without her. That no matter what he would never let go of her. The memories came and she felt the tears fall through her face and that was something that she was getting used to. Every single night she cried, the pillow swallowing up her tears. A sharpen noise coming from downstairs made her realize that he was doing it again. He was breaking and throwing all his trophies. His trophies… They meant more to him than her and her son. Just thinking of Jamie and how he was reacting to his father's behaviour made her spill more tears. He was just a child. How was he supposed to understand it? To understand this? And suddenly he was climbing her bed, trying to find some safety in her mother's arms. All the noise and the yells scared him, the strange lack of attention from his dad scared him. She hugged him tightly. He was her life. And so was Nathan. She couldn't stop loving him. She knew it. And that was the problem. Attending to his behaviour in the last months it was more than clear to her that he didn't love her anymore. That he erased them. He loved basketball, that was the only thing he'd ever loved. And even though that was consuming her, killing her, she'd found the courage. The courage to tell him that she couldn't be like this anymore. That he had to change. He had to become the man she fell in love with.
"One more night like this, Nathan, and I promise you you will have nothing!"
She warned him, made him an ultimatum. And she wasn't going to take it back. But that didn't seem to affect him. He was still doing what became usual every night: he was drinking and destroying everything in the house that made him remember the old Nathan Scott. Suddenly, she felt her left hand was a little wet. Her hand which was resting in her son's cheek. He was crying. Her baby was crying. She kissed his forehead and hugged him with all her strengths. "Shhh. Momma's here." She was there but she was also crying. How did he dare to do this? He could hurt her whenever he wanted to, but hurt her son, his son… Oh, that was not going to happen. She would not let him do it.
The hours passed by and the noises were starting to stop. After all, he sleeps too. That or he was unconscious with all the alcohol in his blood. She didn't sleep for even an hour. But that was okay, she was getting used to it. When the sun lightened up the room, she knew this was it. This was the moment. If he was reacting the exact same way, she would leave. With their son, with her son.
Haley got up from bed cautiously to not wake Jamie up and she went take a shower. That was now the best part of her day, the hot water would always calm her down, as far as possible.
After the shower, she got dressed up and went downstairs. Please, Nathan, don't ruin this. Please, please say you were wrong, say you are sorry. She didn't want to lose him; she'd been praying the rest of the night, asking for his change. She entered the living room. It was the same. He was lying on that damn couch and all the freaking bottles were everywhere around the floor. She could already feel the tears in her eyes, but somehow, she managed to control herself.
"Nathan." He slowly opened up his eyes and looked at her. But just like he had been doing for four months, he ignored her and closed his eyes again. She just wanted to slap him, to shake him and tell him how much of a selfish little jerk he was being. Instead, she cried.
"I… I told you that if you spent one more night like this you'd have nothing, Nathan. And I'm serious! Whether you start acting again like a husband and like a father right now or you'll never see me again!" she hated to say it, God she hated to get to this point! What was he doing?! And he didn't even flinch! She was telling that him that she would never be part of his life again and he had no reaction!
"Go. I guess you don't want to stay with a loser. You don't need me, Haley." What? She didn't need him? How could he be so blind?! She NEEDED him. Her son NEEDED him! That's why she was doing this! "And I don't need you." His words were like a thousand knives wounding her all over her body. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't think. She just felt. Felt the pain in her stomach. The pain in her heart. He'd just said it. I don't need you. She cried like there was no tomorrow. "No! I… I didn't mean that, Haley." Too late. He'd already said it.
"I can't… I can't do this! I don't deserve this, Nathan! And neither does Jamie!" she was yelling at the top of her lungs, letting out all her feelings. Everything she's been feeling in the last four months. "Just forget you ever had a wife. Forget I ever existed!" and she walked away. And he didn't follow her. With all the tears blurring her vision, she climbed up the stairs. Jamie was sitting on the bed, with his little hands covering his ears. She picked him up, the tears never ceasing. "Let's go, baby." She didn't care about clothes, there would be plenty time to get them. All she could think about was leaving that house, that air that was suffocating her. She quickly headed to the front door and she could see Nathan's eyes on her and Jamie. He was afraid, she could still see that, but he'd made it pretty clear. He didn't need his wife, didn't need his son. Jamie looked up at his daddy and waved at him. He thought he was just going out with his mom, buy some new toys and eating some ice-cream, maybe. Haley looked to Nathan and they stood there for seconds, looking into each other's eyes. She spilled some tears and with that, she opened the door. And she looked again at Nathan. His gaze was still on them. Knowing he wasn't going to do anything, she walked out of the door and closed it. And he didn't stop her. He cried, and cried, and yelled and put his hands on his face. It was official: he had nothing.