Disclaimer: Hmmm…this disclaimer is crushing my dreams…but sadly, it's true that I don't own Max…or Iggy…or Fang…or Gazzy…or Nudge…or Angel…but I'd sure like to.
A/N: Okay, so before anyone tries to crucify me, I am still working on The Angel Assassin. I'm just having issues with it right now. Everything I try to type sounds like utter crapola. So while I'm working out the kinks, I got listening to this song by Fort Minor with Holly Brook sometime after I finished Fang. I couldn't help but picture Max and Iggy talking about their feelings concerning a certain AWOL bird boy, and if you listen to the song, maybe you'll see why. Anyway I couldn't hear this song without picturing it and pretty soon it had infiltrated every tiny recess in my mind. There was no way I was going to be able to work on TAA without writing this down first, that's how badly it was pestering me. So I wrote it out and while I wasn't originally going to share, I decided to just for the heck of it. It's not my favorite drabble ever and it certainly won't win any awards, but I had to get it out of my system. Now hopefully I can get back to finishing more important things. Ideas are, as always, welcomed with open arms.
Italics – Max
Normal – Iggy
Italicized Bold - Lyrics
"Where'd You Go?"
Fang,
Where'd you go? I miss you so. I know it's only been 18 days and you said 20 years, but already it seems like it's been forever, that you've been gone.
I found this letter or email or whatever Max was working on. It surprised me. Max never sits at your laptop, never. Then again, Max does lots of things now that she never did. Things that I blame you for. Ella keeps giving me a weird look as she helps me type this since I'm still blind and I can't, but I think you should know the truth even if it hurts you. That's only fair right?
She said "Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,"
I worry about Max, but not as much as Jeb and Val do. She openly admits that she feels worse than she ever has fighting Erasers and the rest of the assortment of baddies. She told me it's like the pain of a constant brain attack in her chest that doesn't go away. I worry, but I know she won't quit on us because she is Max. Maybe I should question that a little bit though, because I thought I knew you and you quit. That doesn't exactly give me a lot of faith, but I'm not used to warm, fuzzy bullshit anyway.
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long.
I'm not entirely sure why you left in the first place. To protect Max? Because if that's the reason, I think both of us know that it's absolute bullshit. Max can protect herself and the rest of us at the same time. So what makes you think you needed to leave to protect her? You're more of a distraction gone than you ever were when you were here. You've always been Max's wingman, her backup. Without you, she's lost her edge. She's working on it, but she's still getting used to the fact that you aren't at her back when she needs it. She still getting used to the fact that her best friend took off without a word. No, you left her a damn note. Coward.
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say.
And that call you made? From a payphone somewhere? So you could leave a message just to tell us you're alright? Talk about rubbing salt in an open wound. I'm so fucking glad you're alright, because we're not. Every now and then, I catch Max listening to your message over and over again. Like maybe your voice will heal something broken inside her. I know better, but still every time the phone rings, I wonder if it's you. Not that I think it would matter much because what would I say to you? Nothing. I wouldn't talk to you, I'd yell so many different obscenities at you it'd make a sailor blush.
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"
Sometimes I wish I could just tell you not to come back. To stay wherever the hell you are so you can't hurt any of us any more than you already have. But I wonder if that would only make things worse for Max. Probably. You're gone, so she doesn't need us to fight, doesn't need the Flock to fracture anymore. I won't touch you because I know she'd ask me not to, but just know that if I could, I'd beat the living shit out of you. And I think I'd enjoy it… No, I know I would.
I miss you so, it's only been 20 days but still, seems like it's been forever, that you've been gone. Where'd you go, Fang? I miss you so, seems like it's been forever, that you've been gone.
Please come back home...
Max has been aimlessly fiddling with this letter again. I don't think she even noticed that Ella's been helping the blind boy add his own little interludes. Which would help to confirm my theory she's in shock. The kind of shock that numbs every part of you. I don't envy you when, if, it wears off cause she's gonna be pissed. She's going to want to beat the shit out of you and Dylan and anyone else that comes within fifty feet of her. I sure as hell won't stop her and the rest of us are smart enough not to either. If you'd just come home before that, we could avoid it or at least lessen the damage. But I doubt you will come home…
You know the place where you used to live,
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,
But now, you only stop by every once and a while.
I noticed the other day there was an extra set of footprints in the red Arizona dirt that's collected outside Max's window. I know I didn't make them. Did you feel guilty enough to come check on her? Is the guilt eating at your insides like a disease slowly melting your sanity? Because it should. It should tear you apart and make you unable to breathe without thinking of Max. You should feel guilty. You really fucking should.
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find that you have something to say.
All of us have gotten good at not mentioning you. If we don't bring you up, Max seems a little better. At least until she see something that brings your memory back. I try to come up with anything and everything to distract her, but then Dylan really doesn't help. Did I mention he's kicked up his efforts to woo Max since you left? With you gone, he's decided to take up your spot. I don't know, but I think Max's getting tired of fighting him. So maybe you'll lose her, maybe she'll cut that part of her that is fixated on you out. You're the only one who can put a stop to it. At least try. You know how to get ahold of us.
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"I miss you so, now that it's been 27 days it really seems like it's been forever,
that you've been gone. Where'd you go? I miss you so, seems like it's been forever,
that you've been gone.
Please come back home...Fang…
I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless.
I'm sick and tired of trying to convince Max that all this is for the best, that you're just trying to help. That you're looking for more recruits to help her save the damn world. I'm sick and tired of it because even I don't believe that. It makes me feel useless, because I can't help her. I don't want to stand up for you, but stupidly, I still defend you in front of Max. I still make up excuses for you when all I really want to do is scream until my throat is raw. You're the coward and yet I defend you.
So what does that make me?
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...Where'd you go Fang? We miss you so, seems like it's been forever,
that you've been gone. So where'd you go? We miss you so, seems like it's been forever, that you've been gone…
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Fang, please come back home...please…
Max…and Iggy
A/N: Ah, like I said, I'm still not sure I like this so much cause it's different than what I usually write, but there you have it. I just thought I'd share, so now I wanna know what you think. So push that there review button and share with me. Share with me so I can get back to working on The Angel Assassin. You know you want to.