"The sky is so blue today. Everyone at school seems so happy, chatting and smiling with their friends."
"I wonder if I can be like that one day?"
I wasn't sure how long I'd been sitting on the rock in the courtyard at school, but apparently long enough for lunch to be over. As the bell rang and everyone left, I stared at the sky for just few more seconds before quickly taking a picture with my camera and began walking into the large crowd. I put my camera into my shoulder bag before reaching the double doors, so a teacher wouldn't yell at me for having it at school, and started to head to my locker, being shoved at and pushed around by the large crowd on the way. I'm sure that this happens to everyone: Getting smacked in the shoulder by students passing by, almost getting tripped but catching myself quickly, getting slammed into the lockers and later finding a bruise on my lower shoulder from it.
Doesn't it?
I wasn't sure why I had gotten a bottom locker in the most crowded area in the whole school. Maybe it's just a prank gone wrong. Just as I managed to get my locker open, damn the thing for getting stuck so often, the person above had slammed their locker on my head, not even apologizing as they had closed it again. Rubbing the back of my head I got my textbooks out and began to head to class before someone had grabbed my shoulder and turned me around to them.
"Hey Mattie, got five dollars? I need it to get some movie tickets for tonight!"
Ah. My brother, Alfred, the most popular guy in school, coming to me for money yet again. I don't understand why he'd do this sometimes at school, seeing as he constently denied that we were related in anyway so I wouldn't ruin his title in school. Closing my eyes while giving a heavy sigh I pulled out my wallet and gave him the money. The money that I worked hard for at my part time job, that I was trying to save for college.
He grinned while putting it in his jacket pocket and smacked me right on the spot where my shoulder had gotten slammed in a locker. He hadn't seemed to notice that I winced in pain from it.
"Thanks Mattie! I'll pay ya back later."
"That's ok. I know you're busy with your friends, so you don't have to." He never paid me back anyway. When dad didn't give him the amount he wanted he came to me thinking that I was his piggy bank or something.
But this happens to everyone, doesn't it?
As Alfred opened his mouth to say something he saw some of his friends coming near and, what seemed to me was a coverup, pushed me down before walking over to them. I watched them walk down the hallway, laughing and joking around about something. Probably me. I got up and rushed to class, trying not to be late, and made it just in time.
-o-
The final bell for school rang and everyone seemed to run out of their classrooms to get out as fast as they could. Of course, like always, I was shoved and pushed on the way to my locker, only this time I had actually been tripped right when I reached my locker, which made me slam my forehead on it. I got as close to my locker as I could, held my forehead, and waited for people to leave so I could actually get out without getting hurt again. I felt like a few tears were coming to my eyes but blinked them back as I put what I didn't need and got out what I needed in my locker, fast walking out while holding on to my shoulderbag strap, starting to feel alittle sick. As I walked outside I saw Alfred in the parking lot near his car, the one dad had gotten him for his birthday last year, flirting with a girl. A long frown came to my face as I remembered that only a few days ago Alfred had broken up with Leah- If I remembered correctly he said it was because she didn't have enough spark in her or something. Just cause she wasn't daring like him.
"Alfred?" A small voice came from behind and, turning around, it came from Leah. She had long brown hair and hazel eyes. She seemed to have a determined look upon her face, and that made me REALLY want to stop her from doing anything while she thought I was my brother.
"No, that's not me-" She grabbed my hands and leaned in close to me.
"Don't even try that! I came here to tell you that I wanted to try again. I'm still not completely sure what I did to make you break up with me, but I'll fix it! I still love you!" She had almost kissed me before I grabbed her cheeks and gently but quickly pushed her away.
"I'm not Alfred, Leah. He's ah, over there..." I turned her head to where he was, making her jerk back and slap me in the face, a scrowl on her face.
"Loser! Trying to pull crap like that on me! I can't think of anything lower than posing as someone else!" She gave a mad grunt and proceeded to jump the railing and fast walk to Alfred. Holding my now red cheek I watched it play out from a distance, and, not surprisingly, it ended with Leah running off, obviously crying or upset. I gave a sigh before walking to the bike rike to ride back home-
Wait.
Where is it?
I stared blankly at where my bike was supposed to be. It wasn't there and I knew it was here this morning. I began to rub my temples and turned on my heel to walk home. There went a months saving to get that bike. I didn't understand why anyone would want the thing though. It wasn't that good, or fancy, just good enough to get me where I needed to be. Now I'm going to have complete and absolute trouble getting to work! I guess I'll have to get up an hour early now so I can make it there on time...Same with school. Great. I can't ride home with Alfred, because if people saw loser me coming out of the awesome Alfred's car, things would get ruined for him and it'd be all my fault. Stopping at the edge of sidewalk I looked across the street at the local park and pulled out my camera as I continued once more. Dad wouldn't care if I was late coming home seeing as he constently forgot all about me and focused only on Alfred. Yeah, he fed me and got me clothes and such, but it was always Alfred who got the best of the best.
Because he's the important one. Born two minutes before me and always ten steps ahead of me. It didn't matter if I made all As, or if I made all Fs; it only mattered if Alfred was passing or not. Dad would do anything for my brother.
So what would it matter if I was late coming home from taking pictures? It wouldn't, so why worry about it?
After taking pictures of the old bridge, the clear lake, trees, and some flowers I once more looked up at the sky, which was now fairly clouded. What's it like to be able to fly away from anything and everything? Maybe I should have been born a bird. I could leave whenever I wanted. Pointed my camera up at the sky I took a picture, and another, and even another. I'm not quite sure why but I like taking pictures of the sky the best. Well, besides lakes and the like, but even so. Suddenly my cellphone began to ring, startling me and making me almost drop my camera. I quickly answered it.
"H-Hello?"
"Matthew, where are you?"
I blinked slowly before replying.
"...Dad?" Why was he calling ME? Is this a joke?
"Where's your brother? He's grounded but he's not home!"
Oh. So that's why. I should have known.
"At the movies I believe."
"Go get him and bring him back for me. If he doesn't want to come back, tell him that I'll take away his video games." His British accent slightly became rougher than usual.
"Um, sure dad. But I don't have a ride-"
"Go at it then! I'll see you later, uh..."
"Matthew."
"Right then. Bye."
I sighed as I hung up the phone and began walking to the movies. Why couldn't dad have let me finish? Now I have to walk all the way to the movies, convince Alfred to come home, get left behind by Alfred because he probably won't let me in his car, and walk all the way back home.
"At least it's Friday." I muttered while putting my hands in my pockets.
-o-
I offically never want to go to the movies ever, EVER again. Panting as I finally reached the theater I mentally praised the Lord when I saw that Alfred had just arrived.
"Oh my God, thank you!" I ran over to Alfred as fast as I could and, lucky for me, he was alone, none of his friends near. As he began to lock his car I accidently ran into his back, almost falling down. Alfred spun around and seemed surprised to see me, but I could tell he was probably worrying that he'd been seen with me by his friends.
"Matthew, what are you doing here? I'm pretty sure you're not meeting anyone." He zipped up his bomber jacket while raising his eyebrow at me. I tried to stop panting, even just a bit, so I could reply better. I gently smacked my chest with my palm before replying.
"Da-Dad told me," I sucked in some air, "To bring you back home 'cause you're grounded." Alfred gave a slight scrowl at me while pouting.
"I'm not going to. I'm at least going to see this movie first before going home," He crossed his arms and leaned into me, "And there's nothing you can do. You're just my backup, Mattie!"
I rolled my eyes and ran my hand through my hair, placing a hand on my hip.
"He said he's going to take away your video games if you don't come back home." Alfred's eye twitched, obviously in worry for his games, but closed his eyes and looked away.
"S-So? I don't care! I already beat all of 'em!"
Why couldn't he just go home?
"Alfred, please, I walked all the way here and I'm really not feeling good enough to argue with you." I really, really wasn't. I felt like my legs were going to give out and my chest was hurting. He seemed to have a look of concern in his eyes for a split moment but gave a frown of disapproval once more.
"You didn't have to walk all the way Matthew. You could've just rode your bike or something." I felt my shoulders slump abit and gave a heavy sigh.
"Someone stole it. If you want the truth, I didn't HAVE to come here. Dad would've forgotten he sent me anyway! If I had my frikkin' bike I wouldn't be so out of breath!" Alfred blinked with a blank face and scratched his nose, a habit he had when he had his facts wrong or when he felt slightly dumb in a conversation.
"Well...still. You, huh, could've caught a ride or something. And how'd it get stolen? Didn't you lock it?" I thought if anything had happened this morning and then facepalmed, making Alfred jump abit.
"Ugh! I didn't lock it!" Alfred twitched a smile for a second before putting a hand on my shoulder.
"There you go. If it was ME, I would've been awesome about it and would have locked it." I shrugged his shoulder off and scrowled, ignoring the need to sit down from my legs.
"YOU don't have to worry about it because you have your fancy car! At least I'M not a jerk like you! At least I don't act like a total jack off to my brother all the time!" Alfred scrowled back, and I knew an argument was about to begin.
"At least I'M not a passive agressive loser! I'M actually noticible, unlike you! You're like a ghost!"
"I'm SO sorry that I don't crack the ground underneath me when I walk, like you do being a total fat ass!"
He leaned in, looking angrier. I felt my face get warm and my chest hurting more than before. I cannot argue with him right now! I need to go home and lie down!
"You're so invisible someone could run over you and not notice-"
I fell forward and, to my surprise, I felt Alfred catch me. I could barely lift my head to look at him. When I saw his face it looked like he was starting to freak out abit.
"M-Matthew? Are you ok? Bro, what's wrong?" He kept a steady grip on me so I wouldn't fall.
"Can you please...just take me home?" I shut my eyes and, before I passed out, I could feel Alfred picking me open and could hear a car door open.
-o-
I suddenly felt myself moving, sorta like I was floating, but then realized someone was carrying me. My eyes fluttering open, I looked up to see Alfred...? What had happened?
"...Alfred...?" I still felt horrible and was begining to get a slight headache. He quickly looked down and looked slightly relieved but still concerned.
"Matthew, you ok? You passed out in the parking lot. That gave me a total scare!" While he was talking he reached our bedroom and placed me on my bed, even taking my shoes off for me before I turned over on my side. I curled up slightly and shook my head abit.
"I feel like I'm gonna die. When'd we get home...?" There was no way he would have driven us back in his car, but he wouldn't have left it in the parking lot.
"It took about ten minutes to get here," He left and came back with a strip thermometer, "I can now see why you were so tired walking all the way there! How'd you do that anyway?" Placing it on my forehead I only gave a small grunt in reply. What had been a smile on his face turned into a frown as he took it off my forehead.
"What?" I wasn't liking this at all.
"102 degrees. You might have the flu. I'll be right back." He ran out of the room and I could hear him running down the stairs. I closed my eyes and breathed in, trying to ignore my headache and the body aches. Suddenly I felt a hand on my forehead, which felt really nice and cold, and opened my eyes to see dad, bushy eyebrows scrunched together and a frown placed on his face.
"Matthew, how long have you been feeling sick?" He sat next to me on the bed; Alfred wasn't in the room, which made me wonder if he went off somewhere stupid. I turned on my back so I could easily look at him when talking.
"Since after school," I looked away, "...Are you mad at me?" Dad's eyes widened abit before shaking his head and, with a gentle smile on his face, taking off my glasses and placing them on the table next to my bed.
"Why would I be? You should have told me."
"You wouldn't have cared," I closed my eyes before continuing, "It's not as important as Alfred is. I'm not important."
There was silence for a minute or two before dad replied.
"That's not true Matthew. I would have taken care of you. Why would you think Alfred's more important?"
I felt tears forming, and my lip began to quiver as I curled back up once again, trying not to break down; Unfortunately, it didn't work.
"It's aways about Alfred! It's never about ME, never ever! I behave, I do well in school, I don't cause problems, but I never get praised for it! You always get Alfred everything he wants, but I have to work for what I want!" I began to tremble as I let out a heavy sob.
"Matthew, calm down-"
"I'm even so embarassing and such a loser that my own brother doesn't even want to be seen with me! I'm a fucking dork, dad! I'm a nerd, I'm a piece of shit! No one cares!"
Dad made me sit up and hugged me tightly, not even minding that I was ruining his sweater vest.
"I don't have any friends! I'll never be well-liked, or popular, or be the person that everyone wants to be with! I'm not good enough for anything." At that point, I couldn't talk anymore and just continued crying.
I wasn't sure how long I had been crying, but all I knew was that during the whole time dad was stroking my hair, rubbing my back, and telling me it was ok. He laid me down, tucked me in, and kissed me goodnight before turning the light off and leaving. My throat was sore, adding to how shitty I already felt, but I quickly felt myself going to sleep.
NEW STORY EVEN THOUGH I SHOULD BE FOCUSING ON OTHER THINGS. SHOOT ME GUYS.
Trust me, it'll get better than this OTL It'll be in Alfred's POV next chapter to balance this whole story out. Tell me what you think so far if you want; Especialy if it sucks eggs :T I'll be updating Shoe Girl tomorrow btw, so I guess you can look forword to it 8DD