Someday, Maybe
FOREWORD: This fic follows "Finding" and "The P-chan Letters". It doesn't really stand on its own, I'm afraid - "Letters", at least, should probably be read first. (Click on my profile to find those stories.)
I would like to thank my pre-reader, Cat H, and all those who have offered comments on earlier versions of this story.
Note: this takes place in 1996, and nobody in the fic owns a mobile phone.
DISCLAIMER: The characters and situations of "Ranma 1/2" were created and are owned by Rumiko Takahashi. Some of them are used here without permission. This work is for entertainment purposes only, not profit.
Someday, Maybe
A Ranma ½ fanfic by Elin B
"It ridiculous."
Shampoo turned away dismissively, casting a look out the window. Akari followed her gaze, but couldn't see anything of interest outside. The cold, gray February weather did nothing to lighten Akari's mood. Everything seemed bleak and desolate out there.
Shampoo's great-grandmother had told them they could use the kitchen to talk, for a while. The restaurant was closed down right now for cleaning anyway, she said. Through the door, Akari could hear the sounds of mopping and scrubbing and, occasionally, the old woman's chiding her assistant and his grumble in return.
"Maybe it's ridiculous to you," said Akari diffidently. "But I hardly know anything about it, about Ryoga's challenge to you and your fight...He didn't write me much at all." She had heard a little more from Akane recently, but something told her it might be better not to mention this.
"And I'm worried about him right now," she continued, "and since you and Mr. Mousse are those who have seen him most recently..."
Shampoo tsked.
"All right, then," she said with a loud sigh. "This what happened. We fight, he win. I make new challenge, he win again. He ask to teach me. I no want stupid boy my own age teach me. I only ask Ranma do that as favour... and to be with man I love." She sighed, a dreamy look coming into her eyes fleetingly, then disappearing very quickly again. "But I say yes anyway," she finished. She took a kitchen knife and started to hack up some vegetables that lay there.
"Why?" said Akari nervously. Although this girl seemed no older than herself, and couldn't even speak Japanese properly, she still managed to make Akari feel very young and immature in comparison.
"Because I mad," said Shampoo calmly, absent-mindedly starting to flick zucchinis and potatoes in the air to and fro, cutting them easily in half as they fell down on the edge of the knife (Akari fairly stared at this). "It must be all Ranma fault. He too scared of Akane to say he teach me, when I ask two months back. So he get stupid pig-boy do it instead. Shampoo plan get better, so can go beat up Ryoga and Ranma, and do it good. Ranma learn he no can treat future wife like that." She nodded with satisfaction, put away the cut-up vegetables and rinsed the kitchen knife under the tap. She hummed a bit as she did so, but it was hard to say whether she rubbed her hands together in anticipation or simply to get them dry from the dishwater.
Akari opened her mouth and nearly blurted out "But Ranma's engaged to Akane", then thought better of it. Warning words from her conversation with Ukyo the other day and from Akane previously returned to her now. She'd had to stop just saying things around here without thinking first. People could get hurt. Or at least become angry and unhelpful.
"You know," she said instead, "he - I mean Ryoga – he's told me he'd like to try to become a teacher of martial arts one day. He'd have to learn to fight girls then, too, or so he wrote me." She glanced at Shampoo.
Shampoo shrugged. "I no care," she said. "He only show up once, anyway. This Wednesday. We start sparring."
Akari leaned forward anxiously. "Did something happen? Did you say something mean to him?"
"No! Shampoo tell you already. Maybe he seem down, but Ryoga so often down, I no think about it. He say he can learn from me, too, but then he no pay attention when I start show him. I go mad, he still no listen. Then Mousse show up.
She made a grimace of distaste. "Stupid Mousse challenge Ryoga before, but Ryoga no show up in time. Mousse no have time to wait, he say now. Think Ryoga hang around me too much. So he start fight right then."
Akari bit her lip. "He used that depression technique, didn't he?" she mumbled. "That heavy energy-thingie." She had already heard of this from Mousse. The Chinese youth had seemed upset and even bitter when he told her about it, though he had not wanted to say much. Still, Akari had had a feeling that part of his reaction - and Ranma's, even more so - might be an anger towards Ryoga for getting so depressed for no good reason, as they saw it. And without letting anyone know about it.
She sighed. They don't understand, she thought. But then, did she?
"Yes, Ryoga use Shishi Hokodan," confirmed Shampoo. "Is dangerous construction technique. For Amazons, is forbid to fight with." She looked thoughtful. "I no want to learn anyway, but maybe try Ranma's variation one day. That one no is forbid."
"And what happened then?"
"Mousse go down, people show up, Great-Grandmother come running, Ryoga just leave and walk. First slow, then more fast, then he run. Great-Grandmother tell me help get Mousse to restaurant, and that all."
"I see," said Akari slowly. She looked out the window again. It was looking heavier outside now, as if it was going to rain soon.
"I wish I knew where he was," she mumbled.
Shampoo didn't seem to be listening. She had picked up some sort of weapon that had stood propped up towards the wall - a big, rounded clublike thing which Akari didn't know the word for - and was now swinging it gently.
"Maybe no good sparring with him anyway," she said. "Ryoga...he give up, he no stubborn enough. He, what you say, he resign."
Akari swallowed.
"Um...is that why you call him stupid?" she said.
Shampoo looked at her with a half annoyed, half surprised expression. Then she looked away, and sighed.
"Think all men stupid," she said. "One way, or other way." A distant look, no longer exactly dreamy, came into her eyes. "At least Ranma have style. Good fighter."
She paused, then added, "He very good fighter," as if to underline a point.
"But, you know..." said Akari, "I talked a bit to Mr Mousse just now" – it had been her first introduction to the Chinese youth, not under the best of circumstances – "but I didn't quite understand why he had been angry. He said something about some Amazon custom I didn't get, and Ryoga not explaining things to him properly..."
"So what?" said Shampoo, shrugging. "Mousse never need reason to be nuisance. Ryoga never need reason to be mad and fight."
"No, no, I can't believe that," protested Akari. "Ryoga doesn't fight for no reason. Maybe it's not always easy to understand the reason, but it's always there, I'm sure. Otherwise, he's as gentle as a pig."
Shampoo snorted. Akari went on, more hesitantly, "But maybe Mousse thought there was some reason to...I don't know...maybe he thought Ryoga was bothering you somehow...?"
Shampoo suddenly smiled, not in a very friendly way. She put the weapon to the side and turned to give Akari her full attention, moving half a step closer to her. "You think I interested in stupid Ryoga? Think Mousse right to be jealous and 'protect'?"
"I didn't say that!" Akari said immediately, stepping back. "I don't – Of course he must have misunderstood–"
Shampoo went closer again. "Girl is sure?" she said sweetly. "What if he no misunderstand? What if something between me and Ryoga? Then what you do, weak girl?" She stopped smiling, her voice rising with contempt, "You be good and 'resign' yourself, run away and hide in hole and cry? Or you try to fight to get him back?"
A wave of hot anger shot up in Akari. She opened her mouth to say something, to shout maybe; but the words seemed to abandon her, and as she tried to fish for them in her mind, the feeling receded somewhat, replaced by confusion. She realised she didn't know what she would do, were something like that to happen.
"I don't know, Miss Shampoo," she managed eventually, with forced calm. "But I can tell you're just trying to provoke me." She glared briefly at the other girl, then looked away.
Shampoo laughed. "Oh, girl is so-so smart," she said patronisingly. Nonchalantly flicking a few strands of her hair from her shoulder, she then stopped smiling and announced abruptly, "This boring. I no have time to chat more now. Work in restaurant."
Akari thought the cleaning noises out there had been pretty weak for the last few minutes, but even if the cleaning was finished, there could of course be plenty of other things to do which Akari knew nothing about. She had never worked in a restaurant.
"Okay..." said Akari, nodding and sighing, then turned to where her things were. But then she changed her mind and turned around instead, before Shampoo could leave the kitchen.
"Wait!" she exclaimed. "I mean...could you please just...do you know of any more places where I could look for him?"
Shampoo looked back at her briefly. There was no concern visible on her face, but no contempt either, now.
"Sulk places, maybe?" she said. Then she turned again, and left.
Akari put on her coat, grabbed her umbrella,and walked out through the kitchen door. Yep, it was raining all right. She opened the umbrella, thinking with a sigh of Katsunishiki. But perhaps it was for the best that she had left him at home today, at her father's urging (he'd needed their champion to help train the youngest boars). True, it was ever so much easier getting around with Katsunishiki's help, and the old boy never seemed to mind the rain much. But people usually didn't like having a near ton's worth of wet pig taking up space in their hallways. People were funny that way.
Her thoughts whirled with Shampoo's challenging question. What would she do, if something like that were to happen? And what if she were in Shampoo's place - if she'd fallen for someone who everyone thinks will marry someone else, as with Ranma and Akane? Would she cling even fiercer to her goal as it seemed less within reach? Would she work even harder to make my love see that I am the best one for him, the one he should choose?
Or, or would she just give up? Because that might be best for him, after all – but what if it wasn't?
And if she were in Ryoga's shoes...?
But of course, it wasn't the same thing at all. Because Ryoga had her, Akari. Someone else he could like.
Of course.
(Two days earlier)
"No," said Akane into the receiver. "No, I haven't seen him, Akari. I did send him a letter yesterday, but who knows when he'll see it?"
She listened a little, wiping her hands from rinsing the dishes. She thought she could sense Kasumi's eyes on her from the other room, possibly because the older girl was worried about the state of their dinner plates.
"Well," said Akane, "I wrote that I wanted to talk to him, and that I wished he would stop doing depression blasts like the other day. Because people could get hurt. But, Akari..."
She listened some more, sighed and leaned back on a cupboard, adjusting the telephone cord as she did so.
"But listen," she tried again. "Whatever I say has to be the truth, right? Because otherwise he wouldn't believe me. Well, maybe he would, but he shouldn't. So I can't just say what you think would be the best thing for him to hear. It has to be what I really feel." She paused, listening.
"No, of course not." She sighed loudly. "No, not anymore." A guarded, defensive look spread on her face. "Yes, so you say," she said tiredly. "You're not the only one, either. But I don't know if what I think really means that much to him now, even if it used to do so back then."
Another pause. "Well, anyway. That's how I feel," she said decisively. "If I find him before you do, of course I'll let you know, or tell someone else to tell you."
"Yes, of course. Please try to stay calm, Akari. And don't forget to eat or sleep, either. You have to take care of yourself," she added. "All right. Yes, you can phone me tomorrow if you like. Good-bye."
xxxxx
"I didn't know," said Akane now. She was plucking on the table cloth in front of her. The rain had surprised them in a neighbourhood she still didn't really know, and they had wound up in this unfamiliar restaurant, where, thankfully, a relatively secluded table had been free.
"I didn't know it meant that much to you what I thought. As they say it does." Though, if she was honest, she had pretty much stopped doubting it by now, the quite frighteningly large part she seemed to have played in Ryoga's life without ever realising it. Thinking of this gave her an odd, unwieldy sense of being both powerful and helpless at the same time. It was not a power she had asked for.
Ryoga was blushing. "Well," he mumbled inarticulately, then gave up and merely shrugged.
"Ranma especially told me that," she went on. "I guess that's why I held back a bit, when I first wrote back to you, even though I didn't quite believe him. I was going to be much nastier first."
"I was prepared for that," said Ryoga, almost tonelessly. "It wouldn't have surprised me if you were." His blush had gone down now, and he was no longer looking down at the table, but on the window shelf to her left.
She looked out the window. The rain was beating down relentlessly out there. She would have preferred it if they could have been outside to talk, maybe in a park or somewhere (a vacant lot perhaps?), but the weather had not been accommodating. So they had wound up in this unfamiliar restaurant instead. Thankfully, it wasn't too full, and offfered at least somewhat secluded tables.
Well, here they were. She felt very blank and inadequate. But there was no help for it. No matter what this boy might think, she was the only one that was here with him right now. Not an angel or epitome of womanliness or amazing heroine. Just her, a seventeen-year-old schoolgirl. And he was just a young man who happened to turn into a pig.
They were the only ones there, after all.
xxxxx
While this happened, Akari found herself having tea with Ranma's mother.
Of all people, it had been Nodoka Saotome who had finally spotted Ryoga going down her street earlier today, as she had been carrying home groceries. She had handed over one of her bags for him to carry, asked him to come in without taking no for an answer, and then made a phone call to her daughter-in-law-to-be. (Apparently Ranma and Akane had expressed their recent worry for Ryoga to her.) Akane had left straight away on her bike to Mrs Saotome's place, leaving it to Kasumi to tell Akari about it over the phone. And so here was Akari now, but Akane and Ryoga no longer were.
"No, I'm afraid not," said Mrs Saotome. "I offered them to use this very room, if they wanted to talk." She waved at the sitting-room around them. "But Akane said she thought it was too crowded, that it might be better if they could be somewhere outside. It hadn't yet begun to rain then, you see. Otherwise I don't suppose they would have gone. I'm sorry, but I have no idea where they might be just now."
"I see," said Akari. She nibbled at a cookie politely. It tasted fine, but she'd had a hard time eating anything lately. "How did Ryoga seem to be?" she asked.
"Well, he seemed a little surprised to see me, so I suppose he hadn't planned to come here," said Ranma's mother. "And perhaps he did look a little tired. But, you know, I've only met your young man once before, so I don't really know what he's normally like. That was back in October, when he gave me my little Yamato, here." She smiled and cooed at the white-and-brown dog sitting beside her.
Akari reached out and scratched Yamato between the ears, smiling at this old acquaintance. "Yes, he mentioned that he'd given you one of the puppies," she said. "But he really didn't say anything more about meeting you." Only that Ryoga thought she was surprisingly well-mannered and polite, considering whose mother she was.
Mrs Saotome sipped her tea thoughtfully.
"It may have been rash of me," she said judicially. "Asking to talk to him like that. But you see, I've grown rather close to little Akane - I feel almost as if she were my own daughter. Still, it wasn't just that I could see how upset she was, so far from her normal cheerful self – No, you may not have another cookie," she told Yamato sternly. "I am not going to have a fat dog." She scratched him gently under his chin, then turned back to Akari. "Isn't he adorable? My husband loves walking him late at night."
"He's very cute," said Akari. "Um..."
"Oh yes, I'm sorry, I do get off track sometimes. Well, I had also heard that Ryoga's parents apparently don't have much to do with him, so I thought that might account for his behaviour."
Akari felt she had to stand up for the Hibikis, though she hardly knew them herself. "They can't help it if they can't be home much," she protested. "And Ryoga's not that bad. He just lets his emotions run away with him at times." She blushed a little. Talking about Ryoga's shortcomings still didn't come naturally – it made her feel disloyal and ashamed, but also a bit relieved. But maybe it was okay if he wasn't perfect.
"Well, it was only a guess," said Mrs. Saotome brightly. "I also wished to hear his side of the story." She frowned, and added seriously, "There was also my son's involvement to consider."
"Um," said Akari. "Ranma's been very helpful to me these last few days, trying to help me find Ryoga and so on...In fact, he's always been helpful to me, come to think of it."
Mrs. Saotome smiled warmly. "That pleases me to hear," she said. "Though I expect no less of him. I did tell Ryoga that I appreciated that he had so often challenged my son, engaging him in healthy, manly competition, as I understand it." Mrs Saotome nodded to herself with satisfaction. "My husband says it is one of the things that have made the boy stronger, and Ranma has said himself that – are you feeling alright, dear? You're trembling!"
"No, no, it's nothing," said Akari weakly, not understanding why she suddenly shivered all over. She forced herself to breathe slower. "No, it's nothing. I just..." This was ridiculous. Her arms and legs wouldn't stop shaking. She put a hand to her forehead and held quite still, forcing herself to breathe slowly.
"Perhaps you'd like a glass of water?" said Mrs Saotome, a concerned tone in her gentle voice.
Akari shook her head, without looking up. "No, no, it's all right," she said. "I just" – she blinked fiercely – "I'm just glad that we found him, that's all." She was. But there was nothing she could do about it, the trembling, the conversations, or the rain: nothing at all.
It was much like the way things were back home at the Unryu household right now, with an ailing grandfather and a very sick sow and her parents' constant quarrelling. There again, there was so little she could do.
But they'd found Ryoga, this woman had found him. And it still might not help.
It's out of my hands, she thought dully. It's up to you now, Akane. Just don't screw this up, or I swear I'll...
But there was no strength to her thoughts. She was just so very tired.
xxxxx
Akane cleared her throat, and took a deep breath.
"You know, it's just that, well..." She coughed, and drank a gulp of water. "...I'm tired. I'm fed up with being angry. I, well. I've already decided I'm not really going to carry you any grudge anymore. It just wears me down. So, if you want" – she shrugged, here, although it wasn't an easy shrug – "we could just go our separate ways, with no hard feelings. You'd just leave" – she made a small, waving gesture – "and I'd leave, and neither of us would bother the other again. Or, perhaps you could – we could be friends, if you like."
She bit her lip, then took another sip from her tea, which was quite cold by now.
"But I'm not sure that would be best for you, actually," she went on. "Because if you want that, to be friends again, it will have to be different, I think… to start with, I know I'd need to ask you some questions. I'd need to find out some things. So, um. It's up to you, really."
She had only looked at him very briefly during the last few minutes. Now she turned her head towards him again. Ryoga seemed to be studying the table again, twining a pair of leftover noodles absent-mindedly with his chopsticks. Slowly, he let out a long, deep sigh, then looked up and met her gaze at last.
"Do you mean that?" he said cautiously. "Do you really mean it, that you –" he swallowed, – "that you won't carry any grudges and all that? That you will release me?"
"'Release'?" said Akane, raising her eyebrows at his choice of words.
"From my debt of honour," he clarified.
"Oh." She hadn't thought about it in quite those terms, but they were true enough. "Yep, I do."
He let out another deep sigh, his entire body a lot less tense.
"That's good," he said. He leaned back a little, taking a look at the restaurant around them. Then he looked thoughtful. "I haven't really done anything to earn it, though. Just waiting."
"And the Shampoo bit," she reminded him.
"Oh, right. I forgot. I don't know if I did that too well, though..."
"What?" she said. "You did exactly what we asked for, what I had hoped for. You distracted her and got her to take up training seriously again. Ranma wanted to give her something, and he couldn't teach her by himself, so...And I wanted her out of the way that the way that day. So, thank you." She looked up at him and smiled.
"Ah, well. Heh-heh." Ryoga laughed weakly, scratching the back of his head. He looked like he was about to ask her something, then didn't. If he asked, Akane supposed she could tell him, now, why they had wanted not to be disturbed on that particular day. But he didn't seem to want to ask.
"Though I suppose," she mused, "we could have been a bit clearer to Mousse about the whole thing. We didn't really think about that."
Ryoga sighed again, a heavier kind of sigh. "I think maybe Mousse thinks you two are being disrespectful to Shampoo and that I'm helping you with that," he mumbled. "Among some other things."
"Oh," said Akane, surprised to hear this from Ryoga. "He's not all wrong, I guess."
"I could have been clearer, too..." Ryoga mumbled – maybe half to himself? – "but I wanted to fight for real again, or thought I did...not always having to hold back so much..."
He fell silent again, but he didn't seem too agitated. More tired than anything else.
Akane shifted position, wondering if she ought to remind him again what she'd said earlier, about the choice he needed to make. This wasn't forgiveness of the 'let's go back to how it used to be' variety. She couldn't offer that.
Because you were my pet, she thought. We can't make that not have happened. And we can't simply go back to being those polite people again, back when I thought we were friends. Either we'll know each other well, or not at all.
But maybe she hadn't explained to him properly. It seemed you always had to explain things really well to guys.
"So," he said slowly, "this means I'm free, but..." He paused, then he said, "But what is it that you want to know? If you'd asked before you'd said you'd forgiven me, I wouldn't have a choice not to tell you. But I guess I do have a choice, now."
Akane nodded. "And you can ask me things, too," she said, a little reluctantly. But it was only fair. She tried to gather her thoughts quickly. "Well...Ranma has told me a lot about you that I didn't know before, but of course it's all from his point of view. And I've been talking a bit with Akari, too, these last week or so. Ryoga, would you –"
She paused, then went on, in a lower voice, "If you'd managed to get cured, would you still have told me truth afterwards?"
"I don't know," said Ryoga. He was looking at his hands, rolling his thumbs. "Probably not, unless I still had those nightmares."
"What if we – what if I had fallen in love with you?" she asked, very quietly. "Would you still have told me the truth, then?"
He stopped rolling his thumbs and sat very still. The silence between them made the little sounds from the restaurant appear much louder.
"Don't think so," said Ryoga finally. He seemed to try to laugh. It didn't come out very well. "Guess it's a good thing it didn't happen, huh?" he said, his voice sounding rather odd.
She glanced at him. He was looking out the window, his cheeks red.
It looked like it had stopped raining.
"Ryoga, you know..." she said hesitantly. "I wouldn't have cared. I mean, I wouldn't have liked you any less if I had known about it from the start. I'm not saying I would have fallen in love with you"– damn it, now her face was growing hot again – "but I didn't when I didn't know, so...I mean," she tried to finish, "I don't think there's anything wrong with turning into a pig. I don't think that makes anyone a worse person."
Ryoga just nodded. There was something blank in his eyes.
"I would have –" He stopped, clearing his throat. "I would have done whatever you asked me to do," he said. "Back then, because it was you, and now, to repay my debt. You know, this summer...when I talked to Akari about you, and those awful nightmares...she said I still – still belonged to you. And…and she was right, Akane. I couldn't become free until after I'd taken P-chan away from you. And even then, only if you could forgive me for it. Sorry about that," he mumbled.
"You know," said Akane slowly after another long silence, turning her empty teacup from one side to the other, "I've been trying to imagine what it would have been like, if I had never met you, if I hadn't known you for these past few years. Because that's what you wrote in your letter. I suppose, well, I suppose I wouldn't have been hurt and upset and angry these last few months, but...I would have known less, you see? I would have been dumber, poorer. Lonelier, sometimes...it doesn't seem to me like a good thing. On the other hand," she added thoughtfully, "that might have been better for you."
He shook his head quickly. "Never," he said, quietly and a little hoarsely.
Akane shrugged. She didn't much feel like bad-mouthing herself right now, anyway.
"And of course, Ranma would be dead," she mumbled, then trembled a little. She hadn't intended to say that.
"Huh?" said Ryoga. "Oh." He fingered his cup. "A couple of times," he admitted slowly. "I mean, he's saved me too, after all. But, you know, it was you I always wanted to save. Not my enemy."
"Well," said Akane, smiling a tad grimly, "you did save me once, that time when Ranma fell in love with you and got jealous."
He blushed crimson immediately. "Um, yeah. Right," he mumbled. Evidently this was not one of his cherished memories. Well, it hadn't exactly been fun for her, either.
"So," she said, dropping her smile like an anchor. "It was me you wanted to hook that time, wasn't it? With that enchanted fishing rod?"
He nodded, still extremely red. "Of course," he said in a sluggish voice.
"Well, don't do anything like that again," she said matter-of-factly. "Magical stuff like that always lead to trouble."
She leaned back a little, flexing her fingers. How tired she felt, as if she'd had an unusually long and demanding workout. Maybe I shouldn't have been talking about all this old stuff so much, she thought. Maybe it would be better to delve into why he'd been doing several Shishi Hokodans over the neighbourhood recently. And what was the deal with those bad dreams he kept mentioning briefly?
But she couldn't solve his whole life for him. And no one had the right to know everything about someone else, did they?
All she could offer was her friendship. A small enough thing, but even so, it had to be heartfelt.
And now it could be.
xxxxx
Akari stepped out onto the pavement and started to walk, first rather slowly. The rain had just stopped, leaving cold mistiness hanging in the air. Her weariness started to roll back in the fresh air. It didn't go away completely, just retreated into the back of her head and somewhere around her shoulders, biding its time until later.
She picked up her speed, looking around carefully. Mrs. Saotome had given her clear directions to the restaurant.
There were too many thoughts in her head. She ought to go through them, all the things she had pondered during the last few days; she ought to sift them carefully, pick out what was useful and worthy and discard the rest. If she only knew how.
Some of her thoughts concerned what Ranma's mother had talked about, just now. Mrs. Saotome certainly seemed to put a lot of importance on boys being manly – by which she meant, she had
explained when Akari asked, to be assertive yet well-mannered; to be forthright, courageous, strong-willed, honest, clear-spoken, determined, and relatively modest. Also, to show a healthy interest in girls, though she also felt boys shouldn't do anything too improper to girls they weren't engaged to, at least not if said girl was engaged to someone else.
It all sounded a little too much, thought Akari. Not that she didn't think Ryoga had those qualities. But could anyone really be like that all the time?
It seemed impossible.
And if someone was that perfect...then he wouldn't need anyone else, would he?
Besides, could such a perfect person ever really understand an ordinary, imperfect one?
Someday, she thought, maybe I'm the one who will be downcast and sad, who will need to be listened to and cheered up. If I have someone who'll stick by me then.
Someone who will know that you can't just be strong and cheerful all the time.
The restaurant should be further down this street, on the other side. Was that it? No – the name on the sign was not right. But perhaps the one a little further down?
She craned her neck to see better. There were two people standing outside it, looking up and down the street just like she was. One was taller than the other, and his posture seemed so familiar –
A fierce joy seized her. The worries didn't leave her, they were still all there, but the joy struck her through them, on top of them.
The shorter figure seemed to notice her now, tugging the taller one's sleeve, pointing. Then a big truck came by, obscuring the view.
One day, I want us to go to China together, she thought.
She hurried towards the crossing.
xxxxx
"...and someday maybe, who knows baby, I'll come and be crying to you."
–Bob Dylan, 'To Ramona'