A/N:
I not sure how I came to write this story. I remember that I was a little anxious for not having enough oneshots to work with during NaNoWriMo. And then I guess I got a little inspired by the 'Every girl is capable of murder' song that I used to another story I wrote. I also thought that I should try something that was not from the Naruto universe - seeing as I have plenty of those going on already.
So, yeah, Akito. Why did I choose her? I think it was because I feel like I really understand her. I cannot say that we have had the same childhood or events happen to us, but I really think that Akito might be one of the characters that I am most similar to in 'Fruits Basket'. Either Akito or Kisa...
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Disclaimer:
«I do not own any of the following pictures, music, characters or the original universe. I only own the story itself the main character and to the idea.»
Thanks a lot to Lightning Bee for betaing on this story.
All the lies
'Is he going to like it?' Akito thought as she ran her hand through her hair from root to tip. It was much shorter now - what if he didn't like it?
"No," she told herself. 'of course he'll like it.' He would love it. Because he loved her. Everybody loved her! They were born to love her. Still, it didn't always feel like that. Sometimes, as she closed her eyes to think, she couldn't help but think that that wasn't the truth. That they didn't truly love her, or that they might not even care for her at all...
The girl slammed her fist down on the table beside her. It hurt, and as she looked down on her hand, she could see it turning red. She didn't care. What could she do? Call for Hatori? Have him look at it? He would probably say that it was no injury and nothing to worry about. He would also most likely put her to bed to rest. No, she did not want him here. Hatori was a good doctor and loyal to her, but Akito had understood it back then, back when she had accidentally hurt his eye, that the reason Hatori stayed was not loyalty, but fear. He had always been weak that way. Always fearing what would happen if he left both the Sohma house and her.
Letting out a sigh, the girl leaned back against the wall. She wanted to see him, and more than that, she wanted him to see her, to prove to her that he really was who she thought he was. She had never understood why, but of all the Zodiac, Shigure had always been the one closest to her. Most thought it was Kureno. It was the obvious assumption. Wherever Akito went, the bird watched over her. Still, she had never connected with him, with anyone, as with Shigure.
Ever since she was young, Akito had known the dog. He had been one of the few that had felt her birth through his soul and as a dream filled with promises. She had grown up playing with him, laughing with him, and then… she had realized that she was falling in love with him.
It had been difficult in the beginning, not knowing what to do. She had always been raised as a boy, as the male heir to the Sohma family. These new feelings changed that. She… she wanted to be a woman. Not sure what to do, the girl had thrown herself into his arms, holding him as close as she could. He had not pushed her away. Just held her, letting her know that it was okay. Akito had wept then. Filled with the joy of acceptance, not only as a god, but as a person, by the one dearest to her.
For a while, that was all that changed between them. They did not talk differently to each other, did not mention the new attraction between them. No, it was only the way he pulled her to him and held her close. Akito had been fine with it. It was enough to just be close to him, to feel his arms around her and hear his soft breaths as he breathed on her neck.
Then one day, it all changed. Akito was fourteen then and was being educated at home. After her teacher left for the day, the girl had placed herself by the window, looking outside while waiting on Shigure. It had become a habit of theirs for him to come by everyday on his way back from school. Today was special. It was Shigure's last day at high school, and Akito could not wait for him to finally come home without having to leave.
She told him so when he came. For the first time she opened her heart and spoke truthfully about her feelings. But to her grief and disappointment, the dog explained that the future wouldn't be like that.
"I have to find a job to make a living," he told her, softly stroking her hair as he explained. "I cannot stay here forever, Akito. I have to build a life of my own."
"Why-Why can't do it here? Can't just stay?" The girl pressed her face deep into the folds of his clothes, whispering words that were barely audible. "You… You could stay with me..." Her heart stopped. She had told him. She had actually told him.
"I…" Shigure hesitated; Akito froze. "I don't think I could..."
Akito wasn't sure why, but her tears flowed down her cheeks, making her face puffy. He was going to leave her again. Nothing had changed… Nothing had changed at all.
Shigure gently pushed her back and away from him; Akito was sure that he was intentionally putting distance between them. To her surprise, she found her back pressed against the wall, and him towering in front of her, hands on each side of her head.
"Shigu-"
He pressed his lips to hers, cutting her off with a gentle, yet passionate, kiss. Akito could not move, overwhelmed by his action. Slowly, the elder boy stepped back, letting his arms fall as he did.
"Sorry," he mumbled, looking away from her face.
"You..." The girl's eyes widened.
"I'm sorry. I should not have forced myself onto you like that. It was disrespectful and-"
This time it was he that was stopped mid-sentence. The girl, realizing what he was doing and saying, had pushed herself from the wall and into his arms, her lips seeking his.
For a long moment, Akito was sure that he was going to push her away, but then he surprised her by slowly moving his own lips, returning the kiss. Akito thought her heart would burst out of her chest as what she thought, but not dared to believe, was true. He truly seemed to care for her… he might even love her back.
Time had gone by and they kept the relationship going. Things had changed since he'd left school. Now they did not get to see each other every day. Still, whenever they finally got a minute alone, they made full use of the time.
Somehow it changed them. Shigure was the same as he'd always been: flirting with every woman who passed by, giving them little winks. But you could see in his eyes that he meant nothing by it. Even Akito, who was often unable to read others, noticed it, and chose to let him do what he wanted, trusting him to do the right thing. He did, spending more time with her than any other Sohma. They were happy, and for the first time in her life, Akito felt like a woman.
Months went by, and before they knew it, it was almost Christmas.
"I can't wait for the holidays," she told her lover.
"You can't? I did not take you for a fun-lover, Aktio," Shigure teased.
"..." She glared at him, but she wasn't able to suppress her feelings for long. "No… I can't wait for you to get time off so that you can spend Christmas here - with me."
"I… I 'm afraid I won't be able to..."
"Why?"
"My parents are planning to go to America for the holidays, and they invited me along to help them with English." He could see how much his words hurt her and hurried to add, "The trip will only take about a week, and then, when I get home again, I can stay here for three whole days."
"I see..."
"I'm really sorry, Akito..."
Akito didn't answer him. For the first time she'd been looking forward to the holidays, to spend time with her beloved. She should have known something like that would never happen to her.
"Well… I'll see you when I get back, then," Shigure said, leaving the room and the next day he left the country.
She'd been very lonely then. More than she ever had before. Even though she knew she cared deeply for the dog, she had no idea of how strongly his absence would affect her. In her pain she turned to Kureno, seeking his guidance and comfort. He was the only one who knew of her relationship with Shigure. The only one she could trust. The redhead had helped her, helped to pull her through the hard days, always by her side. Always. Before she knew it, he was staying with her all hours of the day, and at night they shared her bed. It was nice. It was safe and comforting to lie in bed, resting her head on his chest. He was different from Shigure. Instead of a womanizer who was never present, Kureno was there. He was hers to do with as she pleased.
The days passed by, and before she realized it, it was time for Shigure to return. Even though Akito had spend almost all of her time with Kureno, her longing for her lover caused her to get more and more excited."
Today, Akito thought. Today he would return. She couldn't wait to see him again. To talk with him, to be held by him again. She didn't expect him to arrive for another few hours. She'd surprise him with a good meal. Akito got to her feet and walked to the door. The cook would have to be informed as soon as possible.
"Oh, you're so silly, are you not, my little one?" A woman's chuckle reached Akito through the thin door. Was she with someone again?
A dark shadow danced over the young girl's face. She hated her mother. Hated her more than anything and anyone in the world. That woman had given birth to her, true, but she had also threatened to take the unborn Akito's life if her husband did not agree to raise his daughter as a son. It was despicable. She insisted that it was so he wouldn't love another woman, not even his daughter; she still had chosen to cheat on him after his death. And not for love either, the girl thought. No, Ren Sohma enjoyed the company of many young men…
"You know where to find me, love."
Akito couldn't stand to listen to the conversation and forced open the door, preparing to glare at the two lovers.
"Ah-!"
Shock.
Pain.
It all rushed through her at once. Her mother's long, slim arms wrapped around the young boy's neck.
"A-Akito..." Shigure stammered, letting go of the older woman's wrist.
The girl couldn't think clearly. It was as if she was trapped in a dream. A nightmare designed to take her down. It couldn't be real, could it? Her dearest friend and lover in the devil's clutches? No, it couldn't. She distantly moved, reaching out to the commode, locking her hands around the object and closing her eyes shut.
"GET OUT!" Her voice echoed across the estate.
"Akito!" Ren's voice was disapproving; She was displeased with her daughter's lack of manners and bad behaviour.
"I said GET OUT!" Without knowing what was happening, she found herself raising the arm holding the bell and throwing it at the two of them; it hit Shigure in the eye.
"Oh, dear!" her mother cried, moving her hands to the boy's face to examine the injury. But he pushed her away and took a few steps towards Akito.
"DON'T COME BACK HERE! EVER! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN!" He drew nearer and nearer. Akito backed slowly into her room, eyeing him warily as he followed.
Quickly, before she could react, he lunged forward and grabbed her, pulling her close to him, holding her still.
"Do… Do you still want me to leave?"
For a while nothing could be heard but the rustling wind. Then she pushed away from him and turned towards the window.
Akito's voice was distant as she answered.
"... Yes. I want you to leave me alone. I-I want you out of the Sohma house. As long as I don't have to see you, I don't care…"
She could hear the young man behind her sigh. For a moment she expected him to speak up again, to argue and explain, but the words never came. Instead, she heard the door closing behind him.
Akito was alone. She was truly and utterly alone. There was no one left...
"I HATE YOU! I HATE ALL OF YOU!" Her screams were desperate, filled with the abandonment, insecurity, and heartbreak that had been part of her for as long as she could remember. As her throat became sore, she let herself fall to the floor. She was exhausted.
It had all been a lie. He had never meant any of it. Not a single word. He was a liar. A liar. They were all liars. Every single one of them.
A wicked smile played across her face. She would show them, show them what happened to liars in a world where lies were forbidden by god. She would show them…
A/N:
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it will help me write better in the future^^
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