Could Have Been Worse
Becker sat on the couch at home with a sleeping Connor nuzzling into his stomach, wondering how he managed to get himself into this situation.
It had all started with an anomaly alert, as everything seemed to nowadays. He'd been down in the armoury, polishing his gun, when the alarm rang throughout the ARC. By the time he reached the main lobby, everyone had already gathered by the anomaly detector and Connor was relaying coordinates to Quinn.
The team rushed out of the building and packed up the SUVs before heading out.
The anomaly was in the basement of a botanical garden not five miles away and they reached the building in under two minutes. When they arrived and there was no immediately obvious threat Connor and Sarah managed to pester the soldiers to let them take a look around inside, promising to keep an eye on the anomaly for any signs of weakening. Of course nobody believed them but they were allowed to explore if they were supervised.
The small exploration team consisted of Abby, Danny, Becker, an enthusiastic Sarah, Connor, who was practically jumping for joy, and a few soldiers. As the team stepped through they felt an increase in temperature as the heat from the basement was channelled up into the gardens. The other side of the anomaly was green and there was a large, shallow lake filled with crystal clear water that shimmered in the sunlight.
"Alright, who farted?" Danny completely shattered the serenity.
"It smells like methane, things seem clearer – suggesting higher oxygen levels – and a forest of Dawn Redwoods! If that doesn't scream Eocene I don't know what does." Connor was positively beaming.
"Aww! They're cute in a weird sort of way. What do you think they are?" Abby gestured to a large family of red, furry, lupine creatures with long snouts.
"Pakicetus. Believe it or not they're theorised to be the ancestors of modern crustaceans." Connor supplied, crouched and inching towards them.
"You can't be serious." Sarah laughed. "They look more like hyenas or wolf-pigs."
"Their ear structure suggests they were early crustaceans. And wolf-pigs Sarah? Seriously?"
Sarah shrugged. Connor was now just feet away from the group.
That's when everything went wrong. Connor realised he was further into the territory than he thought and had situated himself between a mother and her cubs. Bad move.
"Uh, guys? Niiiiice Pakicetus. I'm just going to walk away now very slowly and unthreateningly. Nice and slow." The mother growled when he moved.
"Okay. Forget that idea. I'm just gonna run!" Connor took off as quickly as he could, running top speed he was no match for a Pakicetus.
He braced himself for the pain of being mauled to death but it didn't come. He turned to look behind him and realised he'd fallen through another anomaly into a nest of spiders. Massive, six foot wide spiders. With fangs.
Connor had always had a thing with spiders, though he'd never admit it. Whenever he saw one he'd pull his legs onto his chair and drop a container over it when it came close enough.
He couldn't see the Pakicetus and assumed it hadn't followed him through. Still, he decided not to stick around with the giant spiders, especially after he saw a Predator eying him up through a gap in the web.
He felt a burning sensation in his arm as he hopped back through the anomaly then his legs turned to jelly.
"Connor!" Abby was prevented from running over by Becker.
"Wait. He's still in their territory. Connor, can you get a bit closer to us?" He called out. Truthfully even he'd been frightened when the anomaly had opened and Connor fell through. It was lucky the Pakicetus had returned to her cubs over following him through or there really would have been hell to pay.
It took a few tries but Connor just about managed to heave himself up and stumble the meter or two it took to reach the others. His body felt numb.
"What happened, Connor? Are you alright?" Abby immediately started fussing.
"Spppppppies, Abby theer woz spiiies! Fyuutchoor spiedies! Chomp chomp. But I said nooooooooooo. You can't eat this Connonono. Hahah I told those spidies, Abby." Connor laughed as he draped himself over Becker.
"Connor, you're hot." Becker frowned.
"Don't try to flrrt wuth meeeee, coptine! I know yur trucks-tracks-trocks forget it." Connor giggled and bear-hugged the stoic Captain.
"No, I mean your body temperature has risen. And why is your arm wet?" Becker was getting irritable and if they weren't all concerned about Connor's wellbeing the team would have laughed at the situation. Danny did.
Becker attempted to remove Connor from his person when he felt the slickness again. He brought his hand into his field of vision and gulped.
"Connor, you're bleeding. Please let go of me so that we can get you to a medic."
"But Beeeeeeeeecks!" He whined and gave his best puppy dog eyes. "Hilarmy. Hahahah! It's troo tho coz yur a wun man ormie. Heheheh. Hilarmy! Hilarmy!" He chanted, still giggling uncontrollably.
"Carry him." Sarah said, receiving a glare from Becker.
"Not you, too."
"No, I mean it. If he won't let go of you just carry him back." Sarah suggested.
Becker just sighed. "I guess I have no choice."
"Caaaaaaaaaarryyyyyyyy meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, Hilarmy!"
Danny couldn't suppress his laughter.
'If looks could kill,' thought Abby with a shudder.
Becker looped his arms under Connor's legs, attempting to manoeuvre him onto his back with no luck, so he was forced to carry the man chest to chest with his arms looped under his thighs.
Danny gave a wolf whistle.
"Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" Connor snuggled into Becker, nuzzling his neck. Becker refused to blush.
They finally arrived back at the ARC after spending a painful car journey with Becker trapped with a very clingy Connor on a back seat. He'd been forced to spend the entire trip with Connor sitting on his lap and Danny sniggering so much that Abby had to drive.
Connor got checked out by a medic and they were informed that he'd gotten a massive dose of spider venom. The man was utterly baffled but the team was relieved to know that it worked like anaesthesia and would ware off, however the dose was high enough that it would probably take a day or so.
Needless to say, Becker was less than pleased.
After the debriefing, Lester dismissed them all.
"And Captain Becker?"
"Yes?"
"Take your boyfriend home."
Danny completely lost it and Becker muttered a few choice words as he left the room. Laughter followed him from the room and down the stairs and he swore he would murder Danny Quinn one day.
His compromising position combined with Connor's giggles resulted in many strange looks as they left the building.
"Hey! Wait!" Abby jogged over to the pair of them.
Becker gave her a withering stare. "What is it?"
"I just wanted to offer you a lift. I doubt it's legal to drive like that." She smirked.
"Thanks. Sorry about that. Quinn's been-,"
"HILARMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Connor whined and Abby couldn't suppress her laugh despite her valiant attempts to smother it.
"He's affectionate when he's tired but I think this is overkill." Abby sniggered and Becker couldn't resist the small smile that forced its way onto his face.
"Hilarmy Beaker. Suljer syentist ecktro-ecktros-ecktordeneer? Eckstroddenare?" He gave a dissatisfied huff and plonked his face back into the Captain's neck, in the hollow beneath his jaw.
"Connor, do you want to go home?" Abby was almost cooing.
Connor shook his head. "I dun wanna go hoooome. I wanna stay with Beaker! Luv yu Hilarmy!" He snuggled closer, if that was even possible.
Becker sighed and struggled to readjust Connor so he was marginally more comfortable.
"Well, that's settled then."
"No. Nothing is settled. Nothing."
"Sorry, Becker. Not much I can do I'm afraid. You know how Connor gets when he reeeeaaally wants something. Nobody can stand up to his puppy dog eyes, not even Lester."
She was right. Connor was going to Becker's house and Becker was powerless to prevent it.
He sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day. "Let's get this over with."
Twenty minutes later Abby dropped Connor and Becker off at Becker's apartment with a wink and a promise to visit them in the morning.
Becker got into the lift with a scandalised looking man and an elderly woman who smiled sweetly.
"You know, my grandson and his partner were like you two when they got together. They've been together for the past six years and they're still totally in love." She waved as he got out.
Becker was just about ready to smack his head repeatedly against the wall. Instead he let himself into his apartment and flopped onto the settee, totally and utterly knackered.
Connor finally released his sore neck and instead curled up in his lap, nuzzling his stomach in a way that would normally be incredibly arousing but right now it was just amusing and somewhat cute.
Becker rubbed his forehead. He must be losing his mind, calling Connor cute…
It had been a long day but, Becker acknowledged, it could have been worse.