I had this idea in mind for a long time but Katniss needed to be farther in her pregnancy and I wanted to keep a certain chronology with my previous stories. So it has been a true relieve for me to write it. I'm really excited about this story and this is my favorite in comparison with the two others. I hope you'll share my point of view.
As you'll notice, Katniss and Peeta now know that the baby is a girl. I don't want to write about how and when they discover it. I just needed it to be known by them. So don't be surprised when Katniss refers to the baby as her daughter.
Now I shut up and let you read. Don't forget to review please.
Chapter One
What time is it ? I wonder. I turn my head toward the clock and see 6 am.
"Stop kicking. I want to sleep" I mutter in the direction of my enormous belly.
But I have to face it, my daughter won't let me sleep anymore. So I get up as smoothly as I can and head to the kitchen.
I'm seven months pregnant and I'm huge ! I can't imagine how I'm going to look like in two months. The doctor says everything is normal and that my daughter is in good health. Well, that I know ! She is healthy and really active. She moves, she stretches, she kicks, she plays with my bladder… From my point of view it means that I don't sleep much and I have to use the bathroom too often. Peeta says she is going to be as buoyant as her mother. I'm still wondering if that's a good thing or not.
As I walk through the living room, I understand that Peeta has been awake for a long time. The television is on, the blanket has been used and I'm pretty sure he is baking in the kitchen even though I can't hear a thing. He must have had a nightmare early this morning.
I push the kitchen door open. I was right : there are flour on the counter and the oven is humming. I'm about to open my mouth to say how good it smells when I realize that something is wrong.
Peeta is facing the window in front of him. All I can see his back. However I recognize the signs : his tense shoulders, his red neck and his clutched fists. It can only mean one thing : Peeta has a mental breakdown.
It has been 3 years since he has been tortured and hijacked by the Capitol. And the poison is still working. We have been living together for a year and a half and Peeta has had 5 crisis. Each time, I have managed to bring him back to the reality, to convince him that I'm not a mutt, not a danger for him and that he actually loves me.
I take a deep breath and walk toward him.
"Peeta," I whisper. He doesn't react. Usually it's a good sign if the sound of my voice doesn't send him in a frenzy.
I place my hand on Peeta's shoulder and repeat his name. This time, he looks at me. Without thinking, I take a step back. His eyes seem darker than usual and more than anything, they seem soulless. At that precise moment, I understand that it's going to be hard to bring him back this time.
"Peeta, listen to me," I put as much fervor in my voice as I can. "Your name is Peeta Mellark. Mine is Katniss Everdeen. We were together in the 74th Hunger Games and we survived together."
"Katniss," says Peeta, in a menacing voice. I take another step back and the distance between us remind the same as Peeta takes a step in my direction.
I swallow and continue : "We also survived the Quarter Quell and the revolution. You were captured by the Capitol and they tortured you. They hijacked you to make you believe I'm the enemy."
My back hits the wall and Peeta keeps walking toward me. My words come faster in my mouth : "But I'm not. I'm your enemy. I love you and you love me."
Peeta reaches me, grasps my shoulders, and pushes me violently against the wall. My breath is taking away from me.
"Stop talking," Peeta yells at me. "You're lying. I know you're lying. You killed my family. You killed my friends. And now you want to kill me."
"No Peeta, that's not true. I will never harm you. I love you."
"Stop saying that." Once again, Peeta pushes me against the wall.
"And you love me," I plead. Tears start rolling down my face.
A hard laugh escapes Peeta's lips : "How could I love you ? You're an evil murderer. You are the reason of all the tragedies that have happened in my life. It's your fault if I went into the Hunger Games. Twice. It's your fault I have been tortured."
"Don't say that", I whisper. I can barely see anymore. My eyes are filled with tears. He has never said such things to me. Even when he wasn't himself. Never his words have been so cruel.
"I loathe you, Katniss Everdeen."
A sadistic grin crosses Peeta's face and this time, I'm really frightened. His hands are slowly going up to my throat. I don't want to live that again. I try to free myself, to push him back but he is stronger.
His hands have reached my throat and I know what's coming. However Peeta takes his time. He leans his face toward mine and whispers : "I'm going to kill you and the world is going to be more beautiful without you."
I don't have time to say anything else. His hands clench around my throat and not a word, not a scream can escape from me anymore. Soon my feet don't touch the floor anymore. The seconds seem to drag on.
My thoughts wander to my baby. I'm going to die and my baby with me. It won't happen ! I scream in my head. Suddenly I feel my survival instinct waking up. I can't die. I have to live. For my daughter. I put myself together and violently lift my knee between Peeta's legs and kick him hard.
He releases his grip and falls on the floor. I also find myself on the floor, trying to catch my breath again. I concentrate on how to exhale and inhale. Every breath hurts and feels good at the same time.
"Katniss ?" My head jumps toward the sound of Peeta's voice and my arms automatically wrap around my womb, protectively.
My eyes find Peeta's and I see pain in them. Not the pain from the harm I have inflicted to him, but the pain from the realization of what he has done.
Without thinking, I extend my arm toward him and I realize that it's shaking. Actually my whole body is shaking. I want him to take my hand, to hold me in his arms, to tell me that it's over. But instead Peeta pushes himself away from me. His eyes travel back and forth between my teary face and my round belly.
"It's okay Peeta, everything's fine," I reassure him. My voice is hoarse and every word hurts me.
"I'm so sorry," Peeta whispers. In a smooth movement, he stands. He stays still for a few seconds, looking at me with sad eyes. I'm convinced he's about to help me stand as well and take me in his arms. Instead my eyes follow him as he runs out of the house.