AKA New Boyfriend Meets Insane Family

A short fic I wrote for Singularred on Tumblr because she lamented that there wasn't enough Cotsu fluff. I accepted the challenge :D

It was difficult because I haven't written Cobra before, but I hope I created something for Costu shippers to enjoy.

Erik really wanted to throttle someone. Chances were that it was going to be Natsu. His damn boyfriend had left him alone with these people! Okay, so he was very skillfully lured away by Blondie and the She-Demon. But still! Now he was cornered by five glaring Dragon Slayers. Five! He reckoned he could easily fight his way through two or three of them, depending on which ones, but all five of them was out of the question. And he knew what they wanted too; he could hear it in their thoughts. The 'New Boyfriend Talk'.

Yeah, Natsu was paying for this later.

It's not like he hadn't been expecting this. Because he had. Sort of. Maybe not this soon. But he knew he would get some sort of threat. Disapproval, even. He had heard patches of their thoughts the second he had walked into the guild, but with the amount of people and the damping charms (damn that green-haired ponce), he hadn't been able to catch enough to avoid it.

"So." Laxus was the first one to finally speak. "Natsu and you, apparently."

Erik barred his teeth in a scowl.

"Yeah, I'm not overly happy about it either. Go pester him."

It hadn't been his first choice to fall in love with the pink haired idiot and had no idea why he was here right now or why anyone had to know they were dating. Someone dig him a fucking hole.

Well, he supposed he was a little happy about it. It had confused him more than anything else at first.

"And when the hell did this even happen?" The blonde haired Light Dragon Slayer was looking more curious than anything. Well, he didn't have the same history with Erik as some of the others.

"Wouldn't you like to know." He wasn't in the mood to give them any information straight, but he couldn't stop his mind replaying that time.

It had been just after Fairy Tail had fought Tartarus. Erik had heard about Fairy Tail's disbandment, but had still been surprised when Natsu had shown up. He had tracked down Jellal and Crime Sorciere, saying something about training with them. Then he had noticed Erik and run towards him. Cobra had initially flinched, temporarily forgetting to listen to Natsu's thoughts, but expecting something negative. The last time he had actually seen Natsu was when he was in the neo Oracion Seis and had basically tried to kill his friends... So it had come as a complete shock to find out that Natsu didn't have a single angry thought in his head. He had just thanked him for his help during the Eclipse Gate shit and wandered off the talk to someone else.

"I guarantee Natsu started it." The Shadow one, Rogue, was trying to now explain to his partner, but eyeing Erik for confirmation. "I can't see Cobra approaching him first."

While slightly insulted at the implication, Erik had to admit that they were right. He nodded curtly. Fine, he would play their game of 20 Questions.

Natsu had ended up travelling with them for a few days and Erik hadn't known how to react when he'd overheard Natsu's thoughts that he was doing so to be able to talk to him more, since he was another Dragon Slayer and the rest of them regularly hung out. Erik didn't want to hang out. He might have the Slayer magic, but it wasn't like he had ever had a dragon parent. He had nothing in common which those kids. So, initially, he had avoided Natsu like snakes avoid a mongoose.

Unfortunately, like a mongoose, Natsu was persistent and had a good nose. He had tracked Erik down every single time. And finally, Erik had given in.

"What the fuck do you want, Salamander?" He had asked.

"Yo, Cobra! I thought you could read my mind? Hey! Wanna hear another joke?" Had been Natsu's simple response.

As Natsu had teased, he had heard his thoughts. They were of friendship and forgiveness and family. And Erik wasn't sure he could handle any of that. Yet, he had found himself talking to Natsu late into the night anyway. Then the next night. And the next. His snarky comments and general bitterness had just rolled off Natsu's back, earning him chuckles, teasing and a stupid grin. Until eventually Erik's mask had cracked. He had cried that night. Natsu had just listened and waited. He hadn't expected the emotional outpouring, but he had been surprisingly good at handling it. Erik supposed Natsu had matured at some point.

"And Natsu always sees the good in people, eh? He caught you up in his mischief, didn't he?" Gajeel joined in, a smug smirk gracing his features. He had been in a similar position once; an enemy of Fairy Tail. Now, he was one of them.

Erik sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah."

From a start of late night conversations, it had developed. They bickered a bit, and Natsu didn't have a bitter bone in his body, which clashed with Erik's general personality. But they trained together and talked a lot. And then Erik had heard the thoughts in his own head. At first he had tried to shut them down, but they kept resurfacing. How could he possibly like Natsu? It was pathetic. It was just because he had shown him kindness. Because he drove him to train harder, do better, laugh more… because he had a blinding grin that noone could help but be moved by; because even when he was being an idiot or meeting new people, he never forgot that Erik was with him, significantly more socially awkward and deafened by a cacophony of thoughts. Oh. Maybe they were all good reasons to like someone? A lot.

But he hadn't heard matching thoughts in Natsu's mind. Granted, Natsu's mind was normally so busy and hyperactive that it was close to impossible to hear anything (except when he was fighting - which was actually really impressive).

"Have… have you kissed him?" The little blue haired one, Wendy, was holding him with a piercing gaze. Was she seriously asking him that? She looked like she was 12! Or is that what 12 year old girls thought about?

A light blush dusted Erik's face before he could stop it and he averted his eyes. The girl's eyes widened.

"Oh! You have! How cute!"

Cute was not how he would have described it.

It had come out of nowhere. They had been coming back from a job, just the two of them, walking in a forest. Erik had been scathingly insulting some of the people they had met as they went. Natsu had laughed, grabbed his face, and… kissed him! And then had turned around and kept walking, still laughing. After getting over his shock, Erik had proceeded to yell at Natsu for fucking with him. It was the first time he had seen Natsu actually annoyed. He had given Erik an impressively withering look, called him an idiot, and stated matter-of-factly that he was pretty sure they had been dating for "like, a week now".

Erik had only wanted to know what the hell Natsu was thinking. What did someone like him see in an ex-criminal like Erik? Natsu had apparently thought that was the most hilarious question he had ever heard. He had pointed out that he wasn't exactly the most law-abiding, either. But then Natsu had gotten serious and reminded him that he wasn't as bad as he thought he was.

"Cobra, seriously. You care deeply for your friends; you're clever as hell; and you're a good enough person to help fight dragons and then hand yourself back in to the authorities after. Don't be a dumbass, let me like you back."

Plus, apparently his fighting skills had earned him Natsu's respect.

When Natsu had finished his explanation, he had kissed him again, but this time Erik hadn't been caught off guard and returned the action, if nervously. They had spent a large chunk of the rest of the hike back to the main group holding hands and just… touching. Brushing shoulders or hands, Natsu liked to lean his head on Erik's shoulder, Erik liked to run his fingers through Natsu's hair.

"Didn't see you as the affectionate sort. At all." Laxus was giving him an unreadable look.

"Neither are you, Lightning Rod. Drop it."

He wasn't that wrong though. At first, Erik had tensed every time there was physical contact and had struggled with it. Natsu had been patient and eventually it had begun to feel normal and safe.

However, once they had gotten back, Erik had retreated into himself again. Accepting that Natsu liked him enough back to date him was one thing; letting others see him being soft was another. Sorano, for example, would never let him live it down. Natsu had taken the change well, understanding well enough to leave him be. But he would sit close when they ate and sneak a goodnight kiss when everyone else was asleep.

"Have you had sex?"

Erik tensed. Everyone else spun to stare at the source of the question.

"Sting! You can't ask that!" Rogue was looking aghast. "That's private! Wendy is here!"

His discomfort partially forgotten, Erik snorted.

"Don't protect her too much. She wants to know too, apparently."

"Wendy!"

"What? I'm technically 21!"

"You were in suspended animation for seven years! You are actually 14! Stop!"

"My question hasn't been answered! Or should I ask Natsu later?"

"The answer is no and kindly fuck off." Erik growled. That was not a topic of conversation he wanted to have at all. Especially not with what was technically his boyfriend's family. How fucking insane was that?

Natsu had quickly caught on that he could distract Erik by loudly thinking certain thoughts his way. Mentally yelling stupidly mushy things so he would appear to blush at random to those around him was Natsu's favourite game. But one day he had taken it too far and ventured into more sexual territory. Erik had freaked out. He had clamped up, hissed at Natsu, and bolted. Natsu had come after him, begging forgiveness, panicking about Erik's state of mind, but it had taken hours for him to let Natsu within five feet of him, let alone touch him again. As embarrassing as it was, that path was certainly not one he was ready to travel down. The topic was yet to be raised again, but it was clear Natsu had gotten the message. Fortunately, he appeared to not mind. It was just another thing Erik couldn't believe his boyfriend could be so laid back about.

"Can you get to the point, please, morons? Something about 'don't hurt our friend or you're dead, blah blah blah'?" What had he even done to deserve this shit? Actually, maybe he shouldn't be asking that question.

But come on; he didn't think he would intentionally hurt Natsu at this point. Not any more. He might punch him if he felt the need, but honestly, Natsu had caught him cooing at a young snake the other day. He had gotten soft over the years.

"Oh, no, that's not really the point of this. It's more to just confirm why you're dating." It was Rogue who answered.

"To ensure you're not a threat to our family - no ulterior motives, that sort of shit." Laxus quickly added, his tone hinting at the underlying threat.

Erik scoffed, scowling at them.

"Please. You lot are not worth the effort." He knew he'd be shunned, he knew he'd be suspected. But it still hurt.

"And also…" Erik turned his one eyed glare back to Sting who was grinning madly at him; practically fucking glowing. The kid might as well be Natsu's younger brother, it was unnerving.

"Also, we just wanted to welcome you to the family! I mean, you are a Dragon Slayer and all, and you're a good guy now. The past is the past. Besides, Natsu is a surprisingly insightful judge of character."

Erik stared at him in shock. What? Welcome? What?

"Also, let us know know if Natsu's being a dick or whatever." Gajeel was cackling. "The kids social skills are still pretty shitty, so we're still in the process of teaching him."

"Fuck you, metal face! Like you're one to talk!"

Nearly everyone jumped at Natsu's sudden presence. Even Erik hadn't heard him approach, too stunned from the possibility of the other Dragon Slayers being nice to him.

"My social skills are just fine. Jerks." He cleared his throat. "Sorry, Erik, I got sidetracked. Though I'm starting to feel like I was tricked. Anyway, I promise none of this lot mean any harm; they all know what it's like to have made mistakes in the past."

Even Laxus was nodding, looking slightly guilty. What the hell could he have possibly done that was equivalent?

"Every one of us." The Lightning mage confirmed. "And you're family now. So basically, the point of this was just to let you know, if you need anything, just ask us. We're not petty. If anyone gives you a hard time for either dating Natsu or just being you, they will have to deal with us. We protect our own."

Erik couldn't help the scowl.

"Tch. Who says I want your help? I don't give a shit what others think anyway." But he wouldn't meet their eyes, because that wasn't really true and he hadn't really meant to scoff at their offer of friendship. It was just his automatic response.

To his surprise, Gajeel started laughing. "Trust me; you don't have to want it to receive it. They make you their friend whether you want them to or not!"

Erik swallowed and took a deep breath. "...Yeah. Thanks anyway, I guess."

He felt Natsu's fingers interlace with his own. He was grinning like an idiot up at Erik. He squirmed. The attention was getting too much, and 'niceness' wasn't something he really understood or could deal with yet. He was hitting his limit.

"However," Erik's attention snapped to Wendy "if you do make my big brother cry, I am a healer and have cupboards of anti-venom and some very large needles."

Erik blinked at the tiny, blue-haired teenager. Then he laughed. That was more the conversation he expected. And by the look on her face, she knew it and was trying to make him comfortable.

"Hey, Salamander. I like her." He was smirking now.

Natsu snorted with laughter. "Yeah, I thought you might. Adorable, yet terrifying. Don't kill him please, Wendy."

"No promises!" Her sing-song voice matching their levels of amusement.

Finally, Natsu shooed the gathered Slayers away.

"Piss off, all of you. He needs to survive long enough to deal with Erza, Mirajane and Lucy. They're starting to scare me."

Erik let himself be dragged off by Natsu.

Maybe this wouldn't be as bad as he thought. The idea of having a family wasn't a bad one. Crime Sorciere was getting there, but this was something else...

On the other hand, they were now approaching a group of women with the most terrifyingly gleeful looks he had ever seen.

He was going to die for real this time. He just hoped he could sneak in one more kiss from Natsu before he went.