Disclaimer- I do not own Mass Effect
Tension
Tension was high on the Normandy SR2. More specifically the tension was coming from one person. Commander Shepard was on edge, irritable, and of course tense. Many of the crew, if not all of them, were hesitant to talk to the commander, even Kelly Chambers who everyone found easy to talk to was afraid. She had been snapping at them, a trait that was very unlike her, unless something was severely annoying her, and that rarely ever happened.
None of the crew wanted to ask what was wrong. They figured it was all the pressure with the reapers, Cerberus now incredibly peeved at her for blowing up the collector base, and whatever else a commander of a ship had to deal with. In the end they figured it would eventually blow over. At least, they hoped it would blow over.
However, for Commander Shepard, she was not happy about things. She tried hard not to let what was bothering her in fact bother her but she was only human. So, she was put back together after dying and given a few enhancements, but still human!
Shepard sighed to herself, feeling the tension weighing her down and her mind filled with thoughts. She leaned back in her chair, pushing herself away from her desk and her work. Why did that nagging thought just not go away? What was the problem? What did she do wrong?
She replayed everything in her mind as she always did when the problem became too much to bare. She hoped that something would signal her to what went wrong but nothing seemed wrong. Everything seemed perfect. So why the hell was Garrus ignoring her?
Was the inter-species sex they had just too awkward for him? Shepard did not think so. In fact, she thought it was amazing, exciting, and new amongst other things. She closed her eyes replaying the scene in her head, remembering every detail as if she had a Drell's perfect memory.
Foreheads touch affectionately as they looked at one another. Emotions were high and they could see it in the others eyes. Garrus lifts his hand to touch her shoulder. He hesitates, pulling slightly away. Shepard looks at his hand, his talons closing. She looks back at him and he averts his eyes. He is afraid still. He wanted this to go perfect. Without hesitating, Shepard stepped in closer, eyes closing as she moves and she kisses him. Her arms snaking around him.
Garrus is stunned and he becomes tense for a moment. He knew that Shepard wanted this. She was the one who suggested it. His heart skipped a beat before he found himself lost in the moment with her. His right arm circling her waist, pulling her against him. His left hand moving to the back of her head, his talons slipping into her damp chestnut color hair.
When the kiss ended, the two looked briefly at one another. Garrus' breath was caught in his throat as Shepard's thick lashes slowly parted to reveal gray blue eyes. All the pain, the regrets, and sorrow vanished in this moment. Shepard's mouth curved into a smile, not her usual smirk but a genuinely beautiful smile. In seconds they were on Shepard's bed, Garrus' body dominating the smaller frame of his Commander.
The passion between them was nothing short of spectacular. Never in her life did Shepard think she would find herself in the arms of a turian. Yet, when she laid there with their bodies against one another, her head on his shoulder, he held her so close yet so gentle that she never thought possible. Shepard closed her eyes, wishing that they could stay like this forever, Garrus too. Yet, soon the group would arrive at the Omega Four Relay and head into what everyone believed would be the end.
The thought went through her and she found herself clutching to the turian, holding him closer. Garrus instinctively did the same one of his hands holding the back of her head to him while his arm draped over her hip. For a moment, Shepard felt scared. Scared like the time she had been thrown from the Normandy into space and her oxygen cord had been torn off, leaving her to suffocate. She was scared that this would be the last time she and Garrus could be like this. The real last time.
Garrus pulled away slightly, feeling her pulse quicken and her heart beginning to pound. He looked down at her, eyes closed and a worn look on her face. She opened her eyes to look at him. Garrus opened his mouth to ask what was wrong but before he could Joker's voice echoed through the room.
"Commander," he said.
Shepard did not move but she took a breath fixating her voice to sound as normal and calm as possible.
"What is it Joker?" she asked.
"Ten minutes until we get to the Omega Four Relay," he announced.
"Be right there, tell the crew to suit up." she ordered.
"Aye, Commander," He responded before letting her go.
Shepard moved away from Garrus sitting up in her bed. The sheet that had been around her fell, exposing her top half of the body to him. Garrus stared at her and wanted nothing more than to hold her again, make love to her over and over, tell her how much she meant to him. Shepard did not look back at him. Instead she stood up, grabbing her shirt.
He stood up himself and instead of pulling on his own clothing he walked up behind his commander and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her from behind. Shepard froze, listening to Garrus' soft breathing. She turned around and hugged him back, but not before placing a kiss on his scarred face.
"We better get ready," she instructed.
"Right," responded the turian.
Shepard came out of her thoughts and looked around her quarters. The room felt so empty, so lonely. It bothered her being here. She wished for someone, anyone, to walk into her room and start up a conversation about anything. It would be so much better than having to listen to this silence. It would be a welcomed distraction and perhaps it would loosen the tension that had set in on her.
There was only one problem with that thought. It was late night and most of the crew were asleep. She was pretty sure Joker would be still be awake in the cockpit, possibly arguing with EDI or having some playful banter. She was sure Kasumi or Tali would welcome talking to her but were probably sound asleep. Thane and Samara were more than likely doing their meditations. Jacob and Miranda were probably asleep as well but she was not sure she could talk to them about her problems. Grunt, Zaeed, and Jack were out of the question. Grunt would tell her to get lost, Jack could care less, and the same with Zaeed. Mordin would be do busy with his experiments to talk. Legion was... well he was a Geth and she pretty sure he... they would not understand her predicament.
Shepard sighed and got up from her couch and headed for the door. Perhaps someone would be up tonight in the mess hall. Who knows maybe Donnelly and Daniels were there playing cards. She smirked remembering when she won five hundred credits from them in a game. That would be a welcoming distraction.
She rode the elevator to the crew quarters deck and stepped off. It was very quiet. She walked into the mess hall and found it deserted. She sighed again. It looked as if it would a long night for her. Shepard began to rummage for something to eat, however before she could get far she heard the sound of a mechanical swoosh. She looked over to the Main Battery. The sound of footsteps echoed against the floor and Shepard sucked in a sharp breath.
Garrus.
The turian looked mildly surprised to see Shepard. He looked away from her for a second and then back up at her.
"Hey Shepard," he said. "I didn't expect to find you here."
Shepard felt tension creep in her shoulders.
"What are you doing up?" he asked.
"I could ask you the same thing," she said, a hint of bitterness in her tone.
She knew what he was going to say and she balled her fists in anticipation.
"Working on calibrating the..." he paused. "Is something wrong?"
Shepard continued her rummaging, not caring that he was talking to her. After all calibrating the weapons was so important that it had to be done at every moment of every minute of every day. When Shepard did not respond to his question he took a step toward her.
"Shepard," he called out.
"What!" the commander snapped.
She looked at him, her eyes fierce and on fire. Garrus put his hands up.
"What is wrong with you lately?"
Shepard clenched her teeth, "Nothing is wrong."
The tension that was inside Shepard spread between them and it was thick. Garrus swallowed hard. He knew Shepard had been on edge lately. The whole crew was talking about it and many of them were avoiding her like the plague.
"I'm here if you need me," he said, hoping she would talk to him.
The sentence made the commander snort out a laugh. That was a joke. Now he wanted to talk? After everything they had been through, their passionate night together, him ignoring her, and now he wanted to talk. Shepard's hands became fists again. How she wanted to show him how flexible she was, and this time she did not mean in the bedroom. She wanted to knock out the turian. How could he act as if nothing happened between them? Was their night together nothing more than a one night stand since they were on a suicide mission? Was it truly that meaningless?
"Shepard, something is wrong. The whole crew knows it. Sometimes it's better to talk it out." Garrus suggested.
Shepard shook her head. "No, sometimes talking doesn't help. I am so tense right now and all I want to do is spar with someone."
"Spar?" he repeated.
"Yeah, are you deaf. I want to spar with someone." her tone was sharp and it made Garrus wince.
For a moment they were silent and Garrus nodded. Perhaps a friendly sparring match would allow him to find out what caused Shepard to be so tense. Moments later the two found themselves in the rec room. Shepard stripped off her uniform top. Underneath she had a white razor back shirt on. She cracked her knuckles as she turned around to face Garrus. She tilted her head from side to side and then took a stance, hands up and balled in tight fists.
"You know I was one of the top rank hand to hand specialists" he reminded her.
"Yeah, well don't count me out." she snapped.
Without warning, Shepard launched her attack. Garrus saw it coming and moved out of the way, and pushed her away from him.
"That's cheating Shepard." he said. "I wasn't ready."
Shepard regained herself and turned around. Garrus flexed his hands, talons stretching. He then mimicked her and tilted her head from side to side. Shepard glared at him and came after him. She swung at him but Garrus brought his arm up and blocked her. She tried to hit him with her other first but Garrus blocked that one as well. Next, he attacked. Shepard eyes widened slightly as she watched his attack come straight at her. She bent backwards and he missed. When she came back up, she went in swinging again, coming at Garrus with an onslaught of attacks. The turian blocked her attacks but he was soon believing their friendly sparing match was not as friendly as it seemed.
Shepard was not level headed. She was swinging wildly at him, something someone did out of anger. Her attacks were easy to block because she was not concentrating. She just wanted to hit something. She wanted to hit him.
"Shepard!" Garrus yelled. "What is wrong with you?"
"There." she said swinging at him. "Is. Nothing. Wrong. With. Me!"
She almost hit him on the last swing. Garrus had to stop her before she hurt someone, namely him. On her next set of swings, he grabbed both her fists and twisted her arms around so that she was unable to swing.
"Let me go!" Shepard growled.
"Shepard, what is the matter with you?" he demanded.
Shepard wriggled out of his grip and came around, blind siding the turian with a fist to his face. Her fist collided with his the right side of his face and he staggered back before falling on his backside.
"What the hell Shepard" he said, feeling his face throb in pain. "I get it that you're pissed off about something but why are you taking it out on me? This was supposed to be a friendly match."
Shepard glared at him. "It's all your fault!"
"My fault?" the turian looked utterly confused. "How is this my fault?"
"For two weeks you ignore me for your damn calibrations! If your not going to even talk about what happened between us then why not just tell me you don't want anything to do with me! Instead of making me wonder what the hell did I do wrong? I didn't think after all you said it was just blowing off steam!"
Garrus looked up at her and Shepard was so angry she could cry. She be damned if she would cry in front of him. She turned away, picking up her discarded shirt and left Garrus on the floor completely dumbfounded.
Back in the captain's cabin, Shepard threw her shirt down on the floor and flopped down on her couch. She felt stupid for yelling at Garrus and she felt even stupider for hitting him but she was angry at him. She placed her head in her hand. Her fingers laced into her chestnut hair, tugging at them in frustration. She wanted to cry but she refused to let tears fall for an insensitive jerk like Garrus. He was not worth her tears but it hurt, a lot.
Shepard was too preoccupied from being upset that she did not hear the door to her room open and close. Garrus walked in. The only light in the room came from the empty fish tank. Shepard was not at her desk and he could not see her on her bed. He walked down the steps to the lower half of the room to see Shepard on the corner of the couch, head in hands. The turian's eyes softened.
"Shepard," he said softy.
The commander looked up and her eyes narrowed. She got up and glared at him. She pointed to the door of her room before yelling at him.
"Get out!"
"We need to talk." he tried to reason.
"I said get out!" she yelled ever louder.
"Shepard..."
"Out..." her voice cracked. "Just get out!"
Garrus moved toward her. Shepard brought her hand up ready to hit him again but Garrus caught it easily this time.
"Shepard please talk to me!"
"Why!" she struggled to get out of his grip but for once the turian was not going to let go so easily. "I don't want to talk to you!"
Shepard tried to hit him again but he grabbed her other hand. Having enough, Shepard headbutted him, something Garrus should have been prepared for but was not. He staggered and the commander slipped from his grip. She grabbed Garrus and threw him over her table and he landed hard on the floor.
She got on top of him and prepared to hit him again when Garrus flipped her over. She landed on the ground with a thud and Garrus was on top of her, holding her down with his body weight.
"Shepard please calm down and listen to me."
The commander struggled for a moment but found Garrus much heavier than her. After a minute she stopped struggling and looked at him.
"I'm going to let you go and we're going to talk nice and calmly, okay?"
Shepard nodded, however the moment Garrus let go, he regretted it because now he was pinned under his commander, and despite her smaller frame, she was strong and had the upper hand. The two began to wrestle, rolling on the floor trying to outdo the other. Finally, it ended with Shepard on top of Garrus, her knees pinning his arms, her hands hold his wrists down, and her eyes glaring into his. The two were breathing hard, beads of sweat ran down Shepard's face and brow.
"There is only one thing I want." Shepard said.
Before Garrus could ask what, she kissed him. Her kiss was hard and forceful and it caught the turian off guard completely. So much that his body relaxed and became mush in her hands. Their tongues met for a brief moment before the commander pulled away. Her heart was pounding and she was panting. Garrus too. For a moment all was quiet. The two stared at one another. This kiss was the catalyst to what happened next.
Garrus was on top, his tongue making his way into her mouth, exploring every corner and every taste. His talons tore at her clothes as her fingers fumbled to get his clothes off. Once they were half disrobed, Garrus pushed himself off the floor with one hand and lifting Shepard off the floor with the other. He guided her to the bed as she held onto him, kissing him against his mandibles. The two landed on the bed before finally discarding the rest of their clothing. His talons greedily touched her body, pulling it against his own, and he relished in having her against him once more.
Her soft skin was like silk to him, a stark contrast to his rough plates. The advise Mordin gave them about using lotion flickered in his head but instantly died when he felt Shepard pushing up against him. The hell with the lotion. He pushed her legs apart to gain entry because he was too far gone at this point. Every time since the return from the Collector Base was torture for him. He ached for her, desperate to be with her again. He daydreamed about this and woke up in a cold sweat during the lonely nights in the main battery.
He slid into her and Shepard let out a moan, enticing Garrus to continue. He did. He moved in her, holding her by her hips. The turian pulled her, their bodies colliding. Shepard held onto him, throwing her head back as she arched herself into him. She wanted, no needed, to feel him inside her again, to feel loved once more.
Garrus pushed her back onto the bed, dominating her body under his. His talons found her hands and laced them with her fingers. Garrus stared into his commander's eyes. She stared back as small pants escaped her lips. He leaned down and placed his mouth over hers and continued.
An hour later, the two are lying together in a tangle of limbs. Garrus held her to him, a hand behind her head, as she laid her head on his broad chest. He could feel her chest against him, taking in quick short breaths in attempt to regain herself from their vigorous activity. Shepard's arms slinked under his arms and held onto his back. Garrus' other hand rested on her lower back, pressing her to him.
Shepard took in a deep breath, enjoying the warmth Garrus possessed. She could feel his talons gently caressing her skin, rubbing through her hair. She squeezed him in her embrace. They stayed like that for a moment, when an overwhelming feeling overtook Shepard. She did not know what got into herself.
Garrus opened his eyes. Something was trickling down his shoulder, his arm. It was warm and wet. Garrus suddenly felt Shepard tremble in his arms and he pushed back to look at her. Shepard looked up at him, her gray eyes wet with tears. Panicked, Garrus sat up. He grabbed her by the arms, tighter than he wanted to.
"Shepard, what's wrong?" he asked.
"Garrus..." she whispered.
Garrus swore and he let her go. He repeatedly swore as he turned from her.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "Damn it... I didn't mean to hurt you... again. I never meant to. I, uh, I'm really sorry. I care about you Shepard I really do but if being with me is hurting you then I'll stop for good this time."
"What are you talking about," she sniffled.
Garrus looked at her and instinctively he brought one of his talons to her cheek and gently brushed a falling tear away. The feel of him caused Shepard to shiver.
"Is it the fact that I am a turian?" he asked.
"I don't understand where this is coming from," she answered honestly.
Garrus sighed. "I'm making you cry. You looked as if you were about to cry last time we were together like this. Listen Shepard, I care about you. You know that, right?" he sighed again. "I know how much I want this to work, wanted something to go right in my life."
"Garrus..." she whispered, reaching up to touch his face. "I think we have an issue and need to talk about this."
"Is your translator glitching?"
She shook her head, laughing softly. "No, no it's working fine.."
"What do you mean?" he questioned.
"That time we spent together before we went through the omega four relay made me happy. When I woke up in your arms and realized in a matter hours one of us or both of us could be dead."
"You were crying because you thought I was going to die." he asked to which she nodded in agreement. Garrus sighed in relief.
Shepard gave him a look before continuing. "When we survived I thought we would get a chance to talk about this, about us."
Suddenly, Shepard's eyebrows knitted together. She glared at him. "Then you... then you ignore me. Every time I came to see you you were always busy with your calibrations. It was as if you wanted nothing to do with me. I kept asking myself what did I do wrong?"
Shepard looked down, frustrated and angry with him. Garrus cupped her chin, pushing her to look up at him.
"You did nothing wrong," he said softly.
"Then why were you ignoring me?" she asked.
"When I saw you crying I thought..." he looked away from her. "I thought you, uh, didn't want to be with me. That, perhaps, it was awkward. I kept myself busy because... it was... being with you is..."
Shepard looked at him with slight confusion "Is what?"
"Amazing."
"Oh!" Shepard looked surprised.
"I hated that I thought you didn't feel the same way. Shepard you are the brightest light in this galaxy for me. When I thought our night together was a mistake..."
Shepard pressed her fingers to his mouth to silence him. Garrus looked into her eyes and gently leaned his head toward her and she did to, gently touching their foreheads together.
"So..." Garrus said with a hint of amusement, "Does this mean all that pent up aggression was about me. I'm kind of flattered Shepard but you know if you ever feel tense you can always blow off steam with me. I don't mind... just don't hit me that hard... or throw me across the room."
Shepard's face tinted to a soft red. "It was your fault!"
Garrus' talons slid up her arms. "Then let me make it up to you," he said with a wicked tone.
"Sure you don't want to see who is better in hand to hand combat?" she smirked.
Garrus pushed her back down on the bed.
"Maybe later..."
His body hovered over hers and before long they were united again.
X,X,X,
"It it just me or is Commander Shepard in a much better mood today?" Donnelly asked as he and Daniels ate breakfast.
"Are you kidding?" Daniels asked. "I greeted her this morning and she didn't look as if she was ready to knock me out."
"I wondered what happened?"
Daniels shrugged. "Whatever it was, I'm glad it did."
Tali and Kasumi who were sitting at another table were chatting as they ate. They two noticed Shepard's mood was much brighter today than it had been.
"Mind if I join you?" said a voice to the two women.
Kasumi peered out from under her hood. "You're welcome to join us Garrus."
Tali, from behind her helmet narrowed her eyes at Garrus. She noticed his face was swollen.
"Garrus, did you hurt yourself?" she asked.
Garrus rubbed his swollen side. He nodded.
"What did you do?" asked Kasumi.
"Shepard and I were fighting last night to blow off steam." he responded.
"Oh! So that's why Shepard is in a good mood," the thief responded. "So who won?"
Garrus continued to rub his sore side, "It was a tie, I think. I have reach but Shepard has flexibility... and a good right hook."
X, X, X,
Author Note- This has been sitting on my computer for a while, decided to finally post it. Hope you enjoyed it.
