Secret Mobile Suits' Life

Disclaimer: I do not own any Gundam Wing characters. They belong to Sunrise, Bandai, and other people. So don't sue me please.

Author's note: You know about the gundam pilots talking to their gundams during the series like they are alive. Now the mobile suits we know and love are alive. By the way this is my first fic so don't be mean and my name is Mack.

Oh Zeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

Zero: all transmissions will be presented as this.

Mack: Thank you Zero

Zero: grins

Having all that said on with the story.

…………………………………………………………………………………..

The gundam pilots just got back from a mission and were going to bed. Heero looked back at his gundam before closing the door to his room.

Heavyarms: I'm taking a nap.

(He normally doesn't say anything to anyone unless he's about to blow you to pieces so nobody bothers him.) Walks over to a dark corner and goes to sleep.

D-Hell: I don't know about you but kicking butt makes me thirsty. Anyone else want a drink, Zero. (Walks over to oil barrels and searches for spout.)

Zero: I'll take one.

(Walks over to catwalk, which is a perfect bar for six story machines.)

Altron: I'll take a drink, too.

D-Hell: Walks over with the drinks.

Sandrock: I DO NOT WANT A DRINK! Slamming his fist on the bar. I WANT TO BREAK THINGS! BUT THE KID KEEPS HOLDING ME BACK! It's always surrender! Surrender! Surrender! Like they ever do! The other mobile suits aren't afraid of me. But they should be afraid, VERY afraid. The kid is ruining my image.

Zero: You think you have pilot problems. I'm losing more and more control over Heero. It used to be easy. I show him something, drive him nuts, and we destroy everything. That's getting old now. I think he needs a vacation. I keep telling him gazing hypnotically. You neeeeeeeeeed a vacation. You neeeeeeeeeeeed a vacation. I've shown Heero at least 200 images of that Relena girl in a bikini. Notices D-Hell fumbling with a little package. D-Hell, what is that.

D-Hell: Skittles… for my drink. A cute chick taught me that one.

Zero: You don't know any cute chicks.

D-Hell: Yes I do.

Altron: Yeah, like you knew that Aeries.

D-Hell: Hey, it wasn't that bad

Altron: Yeah but `Hey baby what's your sign. `

D-Hell: That Aries had nice legs.

Sandrock: Not as nice as the legs on Noin's Taurus.

Altron: You should get off Noin's Taurus. You're obsessed. Plus I've seen the way Epyon was looking at her. I don't think you're not going to win this one.

Sandrock: What does Epyon have that I don't.

Altron: A tail. Fem bots love a mecha with a cute tail.

D-Hell and Zero nod in agreement. Altron also adds

Altron: Plus Epyon has all her attention.

Sandrock: At least I'm not in love with my pilot.

Altron: I can see why. Your pilot wears pink shirts and stops battles for teatime.

Sandrock: Leave the kid out of it.

Altron: The *kid* is weak.

Sandrock: That's it. It's your turn to yell, "IT'S A GUNDAM" and prepare to die.

Sandrock lunged at Altron in a rage and they began to fight. They were kicking up the dust that had settled over the years.

D-Hell: O_O

Zero: They'll wake Heavyarms. I see no future for them.

As if on cue Heavyarms showed up guns at ready and joined the fray. Away at the barracks the pilots were waking up to the noise of the bullets and missiles. Zero emitted a warning beep.

Zero turned to D-Hell.

Zero: Shall we.

D-Hell: Let's

Zero and D-Hell ran into the swirling cloud of dust. D-Hell tripped Heavyarms with his scythe and held him upside down. Zero tripped Altron and held Altron under his foot and held his twin buster rifle at Sandrock's head. That is how it looked when the dust cleared.

Zero: The pilots are coming. We need to get this place cleaned up before they come.

Zero didn't get past "The pilots are coming." when everyone started moving around. They got back to their places right before the pilots came in.

Heero: "What happened here", (looks at destroyed hangar).

Duo: "It was Oz."

Heero: "No it wasn't. The gundams are still here."

Duo: "This is a fanfic. It's always Oz in the fanfics."

Heero walks over to zero and jumps in to the cockpit. Wufei also walks over to inspect his gundam.

Heero: "Zero, say something to me."

Zero: (Turns to others) Guys, help me. I'm no good at excuses.

Heero: "Zero, say something."

Heero jumps out of Zero's cockpit and walks over to the other pilots.

Heero: "Zero says that a group aliens led by Epyon and Elvis did this. Relena doesn't have a dog. And a dog ate Duo's homework.

Duo smirked.

D-Hell: Grin.

Zero: Baka!

The gundam pilots go back to bed and the next day they ran a lot of tests on their gundams but they never did find out what happened that night.

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