"I am so bored." Mr. Myxzptlk told Batmite in the 5th dimension. "why don't you hang with your buddy superman?" Batmite asked while spinning through a pink cloud. Myxzptlk sighs, "I just don't feel like it. I mean, he's fun and all but I need a new outlet." Batmite shrugs, "sorry, can't help you. Oh, look! Batman tube socks, half off! Talk to you later!" he disappears in a poof. A moment later a green and purple wall socket appears and starts talking. "did I hear that you needed a new outlet? I'm your guy!" it transformed into a green and purple imp half a foot taller than him.

"who are you?"

"I'm the Impossible Man! I just came from three dimensions over. Wanna have some fun?"

"yes!"

"okay, here's the plan..."

Copperhead peaks over Cheetah's shoulder. "what are you reading?" she passes a page to his face. "what, no comics?" he scans the page and sees an article for the world's most expensive emerald to visit Gotham. "found our paycheck. Keep an eye on the kids for me would ya?" she looks up, "who, Grundy or your pets snakes?" he smiles in a joking manner, "who else? If anyone gets hungry there are some cold cut rats in the fridge." he leaves the sewer to the sound of disgusted shivers.

Copperhead clung to the side of a building to survey his target. He flicked his tongue, but all he could smell was that sparkling tingle that accompanies magic weirdos. Mr. Myxzptlk snaps right in front of him. His snake instincts react and snaps at the imp. "hey! Watch the suit. Magic isn't cheep you know. Anyway, how would you like to mess with another universe?" copperhead thinks, "what's in it for me?"

"fun of course!"

"will you leave if I say no?"

the bowler hat falls off as the imp doubles over laughing.

"what do you want me to do?"

"whatever you want!" he snaps his fingers and a different skyline appears. "start with them." he pointed at a group of snake themed villains than fades from view. Copperhead follows the band of brightly colored crazies to their hideout. He waited in the corner of the warehouse, watching. "Anaconda! Why did you trip the alarm? We had them!" madam viper yelled, "your incompetence nearly got us captured! What do you think you were doing?" Anaconda fumes back, "Captain America was wide open, I had him!"

"you had nothing! If you had..."

"harsh," copperhead said while dropping to the floor, "you can't blame her for having biceps bigger than her brain."

everyone jumped on the defensive. "who are you?" Madam Viper asked, waving them down. "name's copperhead. I was in the neighborhood, saw you weirdos and figured that I would fit right in." he saunters into the middle of the group. "so, is there a sign up sheet or oath I have to take or do I just show up like this?" he spun in a circle. Viper speaks, "you must prove yourself to this team. If you are worthy we will allow you to join."

"what do I need to do?"

Anaconda whispers in her ear, she nod and repeats louder, "you must steal spider-man's mask."

"okay. What's he look like?" he asks, smiling.

"if you see a man in red swinging from a web and making quips, that's him." Anaconda says, scoffing at him. He leaves back through the ceiling. Sidewinder asks "will we really let him in if he succeeds? I never made any of you do that."

Madam Viper turns to him, "yes, we have too many imbeciles in our ranks as it is." she walks away from the glaring group.

Copperhead climbed up the side of Osborn tower. The sun warmed his back as he waited for his quarry, who showed up half an hour later. Spider-man entered his sights riding a stolen getaway vehicle. "you know, you're going to be up a wall if you keep driving like this." he shoots a web at the driver's hands and yanks the other guy out, tying him to a lamppost. The driver brakes hard and the police show up to arrest him. A cop points at spider man, "there he is! Spider man! Stop right there!" the web slinger salutes and swings away. Copperhead followed his scent, stopping only ten feet away.

Peter sat on the edge of the building and pulls up his mask partway. He sighs and picks up a lunch bag that he had left there earlier. "this is nice. For once nothing stole, pooped on, or pecked my sandwich. Oh! Jellybeans, Thank you aunt May." he happily digs into his meal. Suddenly a snake-man sits net to him. What surprised Peter more than a snake-man not attacking, or eating a pigeon, was the fact he wasn't setting off his spider sense. "uh... hello. Who are you?"

"name's Copperhead." he stuck his hand out. He pulled it back when Peter hesitated. "can I ask you something?"

"what?"

"can I borrow your mask?"

"what? Why?"

he shrugs, "so I could join the club."

"what club?"

"serpent society. I take your mask to prove that I'm better than them, they let me in."

"okay..."

"I'll bring it back."

"how would I know that?"

"do you have a spare?"

"no."

he smiles, "than I need to give it back."

"no."

"fine." he snatches it off of peter's head, pop the pigeon in his mouth, and crawls off. Peter webs his own face and chases after him. He follows Copperhead to a warehouse. The weirdo crawls into a vent and Peter finds an open window. Copperhead walks casually up to the group of back-stabbing nutcases. "how are you all today?"

"back so soon?" Madam Viper asks, she was laying out plans. "did you succeed?"

"got the mask. Ya know, it wasn't that hard. Poor kid doesn't have a spare so I promised to give it back."

"why?" Anaconda asked suspicious.

"why not? I just wanted to prove I'm better than you." he smiles back mockingly. "he's up on the ceiling by the way."

everyone looks up. "you brought him here?!" Viper shouts. Copperhead picks at his ear, "well, a snakes gotta have a pet." he pauses, "or a snack. Eh, I'm not that hungry." he shrugs.

"can I have that back now?" Peter called down. Copperhead thinks about it, "nah, I was going to use it to collect my earnings for a street performance. I'd make a great belly dancer."

a weird image popped into his head, just long enough for Anaconda to reach up and grab him.

"Ah!" he yelled in surprise. She held him in a death grip, squeezing ever tighter, "don't worry. You'll be dead soon."

"that's not... what...I'm worried...about."

"oh? What is?"

"I just had... lunch."

she loosens her grip as Copperhead comments, "mayo and jellybeans. Those always smell worse on the way back up."

"what should I do with him Madam Viper?"

"crush him." she orders nonchalantly. As she continued Copperhead tapped her arm. She stops, "what?"

"you're doing it wrong." he teases, "besides, I brought him here. I should take the responsibility. Here let me." she releases peter to him. Spider-man gasps, "thank you... I think."

"thank me later. Murder's not on my record yet." he smiles then wraps his powerful tail around the poor hero's neck.

Peter woke up some time later in a garbage can. He popped out to see himself in front of his aunt's house. His mask was laying on his lap, along with a rat eating moldy pizza. He freaks out and it scampers away. "Ew, Ew, Ew! Now how am I going to explain to Aunt May what Spider-man was doing in her trash can?" he put his mask back on and pushes himself out. He lands on a neighbor's roof, "Wait, how did Copperhead know where I live? Also the serpent society was planning something. What ever it was, I have to stop it."

three hours and no signs of oversized snakes. You would think they were easy to spot. Finally, out of hunger and a desperate need of a shower, he headed home. The next day the Daily Bugle announced that a prominent jewelery store had been robbed by the serpent society. Their success was attributed to spider-man not being their leader. After school he heads to the warehouse to see if they were still there. Yep, they were celebrating with a toast and naps. Including Copperhead, three were asleep and two more were nodding off. "That's what you get for a late night robbery. Now I'll just take those jewels back to the store..." he spoke to himself as he lowered down to the floor. He makes a bag of webs and began to stealthily pull the gems from the snoozing freaks. Even snatching the bags from the party. All went smoothly until he reached Copperhead, the guy tried to bite him while he was reaching towards him. This was the first time his spider sense warned him to pull away, Copperhead seemed more snake than man now. It goes off again and he jumps out of the way as Anaconda tried to clobber him. She lands on Copperhead instead and gets an armful of poisonous fangs. She cries out in pain and everyone else came to her rescue. Bushmaster and Cobra pull him off of her as the rest chase spider-man out the door.

Copperhead lets go, "what happened?"

"you traitor! First you let spider-man find our hideout and let him live and now you bit me!" Anaconda screamed.

"Ew, snake cooties." he spits. Bushmaster grabs him by the throat, choking him. "thir... thirty... min..."

he loosens his grip slightly, "what was that?"

Copperhead gasps and wiggles free, coughing, "thirty minutes, maybe thirty five. I bit her, she needs the anti-venom."

"where?" Cobra asks.

"my (cough) helmet."

Cobra reaches down and pulls out a small jar and hypodermic needle. "ten lines should do it." he does as instructed and injects it into her arm. "Ow!" she turns on him, "if you are not a traitor why did you bite me?"

"little monkeys shouldn't jump on snakes." police sirens sound loudly, "unlike you, I'm not pretending."

tires screech to a halt and police men galore barge in. while everyone else fought the numbers Copperhead made his escape.

Deadpool gargled his beer while trying to sing an inappropriate song for anyone less than a sailor. He then spat it out at rhino who jumped up and tried to ram him. He jumps over him with blades drawn and rides the brute's back. "I'm an African cowboy! Giddy up you magnificent creature!" Rhino snorts and fumes until the bar owner shoots him with a tranquilizer dart. He falls to the floor in a massive lump. "I haven't paid my insurance yet." the bartender explains. The place settles down and Deadpool grabs rhino's whiskey. He sits down at a table, puts his feet up and sucks down the drink. The snake man next to him looks him over, "you look like trouble."

"I am." he belches.

"I was sent here to look for trouble."

"you found me. Are you going to drink that?"

"it's poisoned."

"even better. Who sent you?" he gulps and coughs, "blah, non-alcoholic."

"multi-dimensional pranksters. Told me to have fun. Got any ideas?"

a smile bursts across Deadpool's ugly mug, "a few. We'll start with the Avengers."

oh no! What are those two going to do? Don't worry, I've got a list. This is going to be fun.