It started as an ill-conceived idea, and then evolved as I developed the idea in my head. Then I watched a crime show on TV involving several teenage girls falling prey and taken hostage by an escaped convict – a serial killer and rapist. This sudden burst sure helped me with at least five stories! (Bloody GCE Exams over! HURRAY!) Frequent readers of mine might find this boring, like everything else I write; after all, I write these things all the time...are you even sure? But I never get tired of them, anyway.

Anyway, no implied coupling. No sexual themes either, none implied, only violence and dark perverted thoughts. Therefore this is still a Teen-rated story.

Disclaimer: Didn't own iCarly, never owned iCarly, never WILL own iCarly.

News

"Seattle residents are today issued a public warning that an escaped convict is at large within or outside the city. Experts advise everyone to lock doors and windows, leave no children alone and unattended when outside the safety of your home, and be on a constant watch for danger. Citizens should be careful about their safety as well as those around them. Should this man be sighted, do not approach or confront him. Dial 911 and inform the police immediately..."

"Blah, blah, blah..." Sam thought aloud. She was silenced immediately by a sharp "Ssh!" from Carly, whose gaze was fixed to the newscaster on the large TV screen.

"The escaped convict, a serial killer and rapist, escaped from a low-security prison in Arizona three weeks ago. Since the breakout, he has invaded several homes and sexually assaulted and murdered their residents, all of them young teenage girls. While homicide investigators are on his trail, no one has yet to catch him. The Teenage Girl Killer, as he is also called..."

"Lame!" Sam said with a hint of contempt for the incredible unimaginative name. Of all names the media has dubbed criminals, this has got to be the worst, she thought, a sneer-like smile playing around on her lips as she began to imagine the newscaster as a brainless gorilla reading a dummy card for the camera...

"Sam!" Carly hissed.

"What? That's the dumbest nickname I've ever heard!"

"Be quiet, this is serious!"

The newscaster' report went on and on. Sam was zoning out; she hated his droning, monotonous and utterly lifeless voice he used whenever he was on camera. It sounded so much like the one her math teacher uses in class...

"Police intelligence and experts report that this criminal is trying to flee the United States of America for Vancouver in Canada. Experts also say that Seattle will be his last hiding place since the previous locations where he has been sighted. 'Seattle will be his gateway to Vancouver. We believe that since it's his last stop, he is also going to be extremely desperate and particularly dangerous at this time,' says the spokesman for the chief investigator of the FBI. 'Extra vigilance is required of the Seattle residents as we try to track this vicious criminal down and catch him before he reaches Canada.'"

"Next, the stock market prices have dropped significantly once again. Financial experts claim it is the worst recession..."

Sam could take it no more. "I need a sandwich," she said tartly, getting up from the couch and heading for the kitchen.

Carly got up and followed her. With a look and voice full of nervousness, she said, "Sam, this is serious stuff! You shouldn't be taking it so lightly."

"Come on," Sam said incredulously, laughing at the anxiousness on her friend's face. "They call this guy a Teenage Girl Killer. You can't get any phonier than that with that kind of stupid name."

"Yes, but this guy is dangerous. He's on the loose, and a few people already got killed! What if he comes here, and we..." Carly broke off in slight panic.

"So what?" Sam scoffed. "Half my family is dangerous, me included. I don't get why you're so scared."

"He's a murderer and rapist! Doesn't that tell you something about him?"

"Yeah, I don't think I'll ever want to date him." Sam replied with a light-hearted sarcastic tone in her voice. "Wooh! I'm soooo scared!"

Sam pretended to shake in terror and nearly dropped the sandwich. She cursed, picked it up and proceeded to shove the thing into the mouth regardless. The humorous mocking and unintended comedy seemed to have reassured and cheered Carly up a little; at least someone was taking this news lightly. Carly laughed at herself for a moment, wondering exactly why she was so nervous about this serial-killer-on-the-loose whose name she didn't even remember, and probably would not ever meet.

She glanced at the clock on the wall. Oops, she thought. iCarly rehearsal time.

"Hey, Sam," Carly said. "Maybe we should just mention this again for our viewers tonight. I know it doesn't mean anything to people uninvolved, but it might be good to at least warn people around Seattle...?"

"As long as it doesn't take us more than twenty seconds," Sam replied, unconcerned and with a sandwich crammed in her mouth.

"Alright," Carly laughed. "Come on, time to rehearse iCarly."

iCarly time. Sorry, I'm just got tired of the usual story form, so you'll simply have to settle for this annoying format:

Carly: Okay, iCarly viewers. Before we wrap tonight's show up, we just want to issue a very important public announcement for everyone in Seattle.

Sam: In case you just missed the horribly boring news report just now.

Carly: As we all know, there is a dangerous man on the loose...

Sam: ...who is not Freddie the dork.

Carly: He's much worse. He's an escaped convict.

Sam (phony hushed nervous tones): They call him the Teenage Girl Killer.

Carly: And he's currently trying to get to Vancouver...

Sam: ...in Canada...

Carly: ...and is somewhere in Seattle right now.

Sam: So everyone be careful...

Carly: ...and lock up all doors and windows,

Sam: ...and be careful.

Carly: 'Coz this guy is bad.

Sam: Evil.

Carly: Insane.

Sam: A maniac!

Carly: A nutcase!

Sam: And whatever you do, DON'T GIVE HIM A SANDWICH!!!

Carly: Unless you want him to do terrible things to you.

Sam('ghost' voice): Terrible!

Carly (elbowing Sam): For once on iCarly, we're serious. This dude is seriously perverted and evil. Stay out of trouble, please.

Sam: Okay, Carly, your twenty seconds is up.

Carly: Okay! Looks like we have to go!

Sam: I need a sandwich!

Carly: Don't forget to catch us live here, next week, on .

Sam: ONLY on .

Carly: So go there!

Sam: Do it!

Carly: Seriously!

Sam: And now, Carly and I will start making random farm animal noises.

(Carly and Sam started making nonsensical sheep and chicken noises)

"And we're clear!" Freddie announces.

Blood was dripping off the knife. Blood was seeping out of the girl's throat, where the screams came from seconds ago, and silenced by the cold metal blade. Blood oozed out and formed a dark red pool, which the little girl was now lying in; face down, as dead and cold as the room, the knife, the man's heart of stone.

It's a pity such a cute little girl had to die like this. After all, he could have had another ten minute's worth of fun with her before he killed her. But the girl was running towards the phone; an action that would jeopardize his entire mission. It's surprising even an eight-year-old knows how to do such things.

The convict was here not for the girl, but for food and money; he chose this home because it was empty save the little girl, and whosoever left previously was too asinine to remember to lock the door. He had to reach Vancouver first, before anything else, and not even an innocent child would stand in his way. He stamped her out like a cockroach, just like the other girls he preyed on in other states. Those weren't coincidences, of course. He aimed at girls at home, alone. The vulnerable ones, the ones he could have fun with.

But what's this? The man thought as he spied what the girl was watching on her computer before doing a runner and meeting her deserving fate. It was a web show, a live one, probably, and those two girls were talking about a certain escaped convict. A pervert. Of course, he thought with a wry smile. They were talking about him.

They are wrong on one thing. He was not in Seattle, not yet. He is in the suburbs, biding his time, but also rushing madly for Canada. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to drop by and visit the two girls before he took off? After all, they will never catch him. In particular, he liked the blonde girl. He wanted to touch it, to hurt it...

No, the escape was more important...

But the black-haired girl looks nice too...

Escape! Do not let it be ruined by a mere temptation!

But both the girls look so attractive...sexy, even...

Sure, why not? If he ever happened to meet them, he will give them some...

A grin appeared on the man's face. A maniacal, evil, twisted grin.

I understand that a convict trying to escape to Canada is not likely to barge into an apartment on the ninth storey of a flat out of hundreds in Seattle, when he's got other houses easier to get into, and a very important mission to complete. But for the sake of this story, I have to defy the laws of logic and do it as I plan! Because the regular 'menace around the neighbourhood' criminal is simply either too common, or I use those kind of criminals too often. This time I try something different, although not very sensible. (Hey, I'm just trying to follow the TV show, ok?)

Anyway, the iCarly web show is a take-turns speech thing, so there's no way I can write it in story format without taking me five hours to type. It's easier in speech form, but a bit annoying, also. Oh, I dunno...

Expect the worst next...if you know me well, you'll know exactly what to expect.

Terrorking tragedian