Chapter 1- Right Here?

As everyone knows, KHII rocks. A lot, and for those who don't see it, it is jam packed with yaoi. Duh. But I grew tired of AxelxRoxas, just as I did RikuxSora so anything that's not AxR is good! To point that is, there is no way around it really. BUT! All the other people need some loving too. And more than most- like the Organization members need to get togehter. Hence why this is XigbarxDemyx, DemyxxAxel, AxelxRoxas, and some others... Here we go!

It didn't really matter to him as long as he felt like he was alive. Each of the other Organization members did their own little thing when the fact of them being 'nobodies' really sunk in at time. Axel kept Roxas around him a lot because he stated from time to time whenever someone asked about it, he said, "I'm not sure really...I kinda feel like I have a heart around him...or some crap like that." He would wave everyone off with a hand and shrug, going about his business. Xigbar always raised an elegant eyebrow at that statement. He was also guilty of having a weird habit of feeling like he had a heart. It was nothing big, nor did anyone else know about it (because if they did he would have to beat them to death) but brining Xenmas his tea in the afternoons gave him a the feeling of having just a bit more purpose than the others. If being 'chosen' lead to the emotion of being needed, it meant he had somewhat of a soul. And if a little bit of soul was in him it meant that it was connected to a heart. You can't have one without the other, hence why he was one of the most loyalist of the members.

Others had habits, hobbies, items, or personal quarks that gave them all the illusion that if they had it, it was a good enough explanation/excuse of having a heart. Demyx's habit was most likely the oddest but the members lived under a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy. More reason than any other was even though they didn't have hearts, they still had their lives. And if they wished to keep it secret it was up to them. That was another small human trait that they could call their own- privacy. But everyone knew about Demyx's- in fact he wanted everyone to know.

The dirty blond did it because it was his personal reasons to feel real. To have a heart. To be human again. He would always tell people that he had feelings, and a heart. Even though each explanation came with a shy smile and hands up in defense. He had to defend himself to prove that he had a heart. Demyx needed others to believe he was real. He needed the attention of others. The theory was sound- if he was recognized that meant he was real. If he was real, he had to be something. He was a man so that something means he is human. Humans have hearts. Axel always cocked his head to the side at his team mates explanation but allowed him to believe whatever the young man wanted. Who was the red head to stop him anyway?

In Demyx's past life, he must have had a wife or lover or something along those lines. It gave a background to his behavior as a Nobody. When the young man first joined the club the behavior pattern was small. He would stand closer to anyone more so than needed. Personal space didn't register with him. Than once the members started to grow on each other, almost like a team, no one minded him. He brushed against someone's shoulder or lightly bumped into everyone. Contact meant feelings. It even gave off more than one feeling, which was pure gold to him. It sometimes made Larxene giggle and frown at the same time. Xaldin didn't mind it if it wasn't for too long. The tall man sometimes had to push Demyx away if he hung around too long. Axel was all too glad to receive it. He was even saddened by the fact that sooner or later Demyx would have to leave... Demyx was such a happy spirt for such a horrible place, it was almost sad to see his smile fade again and again. He snickered a lot and acted like a teenage most of the time, always complaining about going out on missions or not paying attention to finer details to a plan. Over the years he learned the people to stay away from- like Marluxia and Xemnas. Those two gave him one warning, and only one.

As years kept going by, slight touches were no enough. It didn't really matter to him as long as he felt like he was alive.

Xigbar was his first. Demyx would have rather had Axel of course, but things just didn't want to go his way that night. A night he still remembers well.

Time is a bitch. A foul mistress that enjoys screwing with everyone. It didn't matter who you were, or what you did, or what you wanted. And the worst part was that there was nothing anyone could do about it. A few seconds off could ruin everything. Those few seconds were all that Demyx had that stood between what he wanted and what he couldn't have.

The young man sat on the edge of a fountain that was in a garden at the back of the castle. The entire garden was created by Naime with colored pencils, with each of the members adding in their own favorite flowers to make it a little more like their own place. Demyx didn't remember what he told her to add. He was never one for flowers, but one for music. As he sat there, the sun would have been slowly setting, but the world he lived in did not have a center star of heat that gave off beautiful sky colors. It was pretty much always dusk, and one would have the get used to it after some time. He hummed softly to himself as the water in front of him made small circles within each other as the fountain continued to spout water out. Water was his element, a piece of him, so naturally he came to this spot of all places to come to relax. On occasion he brought his sitar out just to practice. And it wasn't even real practice as it was just stringing the few cords back and forth. Sometimes it made lovely little tunes, other times it was just noise that made other members leave the garden out of shear annoyance if they were there.

It was such a great tool, he thought to himself. The sitar could sooth away pain or bring it. It was almost him in instrument form. But there was a reason for the dirty blond to be out here, at this time. He knew that Axel would waltz by as he usually did after a mission. Demyx knew that he just came back from a mission too, for when he sought out the red head and couldn't find him, he was forced to ask Roxas.

Roxas was an interesting boy. For some reason he got on Demyx nerves at times. He rarely touched the blond boy, he couldn't help it. It wasn't the boy's fault, more like how the boy was. Demyx would have liked him more if he didn't draw in Axel's attention 23 hours of the day. Demyx was the attention whore, not him, and he would fight for the title. On the other hand though, Roxas had no clue. The blond was dense at times, even when Demyx could bluntly see how hard Axel tired to get the boy to smile, or laugh, or respond with a detailed sentence. When the boy did nothing or said nothing back, Axel grew upset and kept trying. Axel was being tormented by him and Roxas didn't even notice it.

Tonight Demyx would end Axel's suffering. Tonight Demyx would give himself to Axel. He thought long and hard about this too. It wasn't a quick decision just because Demyx wanted more out of touching. He even asked around for advise. Of course no names were involved, but when he asked "If you like someone, but they don't know, but they would if they did...what do you do?" Larxene was the only one that gave him a real answer, "I would just tell them. It makes it a lot easier for everyone." That gave a slight hint to the women's past. Demyx thought that she might have had a husband...but it went sour along the way. Or something like that, but it wasn't any of his business.

Axel was Demyx's Roxas if he was Axel. It was hard to follow, even to him, but he could understand how Axel felt when he was around the boy. Axel made Demyx feel...something. And if he felt anything that was good enough for him. Axel was the one that loved spending time with him when he was around. They joked about almost everything. They connected with each other for they were both boys trapped in mens bodies. They almost hated all the same people in the group, and out of everybody they wanted to have hearts more than anyone. Except Xenmas and Saix. Axel leaned more on him than he did on Axel and Demyx loved having the feeling of being wanted. There was a time they ended up holding hands, he didn't remember how or why, but he did remember that they did that for a long time and it felt right. Axel even cared. He knew when Demyx was upset, when the loneliness got to be too much for him, and he asked questions. Tired to make him feel better. And unlike Roxas, Demyx allowed Alex to make him feel better, and opened up to him than he did to anyone else.

Because nothing was really said, Demyx still hung around the other members too. Not as much as Axel, but the red head most likely didn't notice since Demyx was gone half the time, or on mission. Demyx glared at his reflection in the water as he thought about missions. He was too talented to be sent out for grunt work. When he kept whining that they sent the wrong guy, he really meant it. But it couldn't be helped nor fixed. Demyx couldn't go to the 'boss' and complain. He would lose his life over that. And missions were in the end completed with a pat on the back...he still hated them...

Speaking of the devil will bring him knocking at you're door.

"Here are your orders, Mulletboy."

The water in the fountain spurted around angrily as the words reached Demyx ears. If it was one thing he hated more than having his hair being called a mullet, it was the person who said it. Just because he wanted these people to pay attention to him, didn't mean he had to like them all equally. Demyx looked over his shoulder to see the form of Xigbar fill his eyesight, and it seemed that the scarred man had just finished dinner, as Demyx saw the little tan stick poke our of his mouth. Xigbar made a 'tisk' noise as he sucked on his toothpick and looked down at the Nobody that sat below him. And there, in his black gloved hand, was Demyx most hated thing in the world. An assignment paper.

All thoughts of shouting out an insult back at the gun wielder went away as the words before the mullet statement came into play. Demyx shot up with wide horrified eyes, "No! No no no nonononono. You gotta be kidding me! Now?" He stormed over to Xigbar, the whole two yards, and snatched the paper from his large hands. Once he read over the facts and goals, all his anger melted away as he turned to a grumpy three year old. A pout was placed on his face as he concentrated looking at the paper. Maybe if he stared at it long enough it would light one fire and he wouldn't have to do it anymore. Of all the times he wished Axel was there...

Xigbar made another 'tisk' nosie as he moved the pointy object in his mouth from side to side.

The taller man jabbed a finger at Demyx's forehead as he looked down at the slouching boy.

"Don't be such a pussy. Just go do it."

"I don't think you're sending the right guy."

Xigbar rolled his eyes, "Right. Now be a good boy and get your ass in gear." Xigbar didn't think it was possible but Demyx pouted and glared even more at the paper. He didn't even look up to glare at Xigbar for calling him a pussy, it didn't matter to him now, seeings how his plans with Axel got screwed over since he had to leave ASAP. Xigbar turned to leave the youth in his own self worthlessness before he stopped and without turning spoke, "You don't have to leave right away you know..."

Demyx expression switched to surprise and he straightened up to look at Xigbar's back. The man's long pony tail swayed slightly in the wind and another 'tisk' noise was heard before a spiting noise, as Xigbar discarded his used up toothpick.

"R-really?"

Xigbar was second in rank within the Organization so he could always explain to Xenmas why Demyx was a little late for a mission without too much questioning. This would be a first. Ever. This was a little lee way that Demyx was receiving, and his plans might not fall through after all. Xigbar shrugged his larger shoulders and turned back to face the surprised boy.

"I don't see why not...Why? You doing something here or not? Seems like you are..."

"Uhh..." There wasn't a good explanation he could have given to the second in the command, nor did a good lie formulate in his skull. All Demyx managed to was scratch the back of his head. The movement made his wild, slept- on- for- too- long- mullet mohawk move slightly and the chains of his jacket to make a gentle clang noise. Demyx suddenly realized and felt the heavy stare of Xigbar's one good eye and became at a loss for words as a slight blush crept to his face. Which in all fairness, made to sense. Xigbar glared towards Demyx all the time, either from standing to close or being childish or just stupid. And the older man wasn't even all that good looking- with a missing eye, white streaks of hair most likely from stress, scars that were large and a slight shade darker than his own skin- so the blush was uncalled for. But there was a feeling...a feeling of something, and Demyx couldn't place his finger on it. Maybe it was just nerves, since the true purpose of being here was rather embarrassing and Xigbar was rather intimidating.

"Tch. Fine, just go." He turned back once again, but this time it wasn't himself stopping from disappearing into the shadows, but Demyx's high pitched, "No! Wait."

Demyx was sending mixed messages, and it was annoying the larger man. All Demyx wanted was to meet Axel tonight. Demyx looked down on the ground, searching for his answer there, but he didn't find it. Instead he found Xigbar's shiny boots. Demyx looked up to find Xigbar smiling at him and than ungracefully capturing his lips. Demyx's whole body and mind shut off as his eyes closed to fully feel what was happening to him.

'There! Right there!' Demyx thought to himself as he felt his...heart race? Yes! It was his heart. This proved it, because as Xigbar kissed him his heart pounded in his chest. Both fear and adrenalin rushed through his veins. It had to be a heart, because what else was making him feel light headed and the load echoing sound that rang in his own ears. A heart that jumped started now. Demyx almost forgot that another man was kissing him right now, for he was too happy to be feeling something that radiated from his heart. A small dim sadness lucked though. In the back of his head and the back of his newly found heart. This was Xigbar after all...not Axel. Xigbar pulled back with the same smile and something red caught Demyx eye. As he turned just in time to see the ends of the red spikes of hair, and black coat ends flapping in the wind as Axel left the area, his form going behind the castle wall. Now Demyx felt as if his heart... 'broke'. At least that's what it felt like. His chance was gone, as Axel who just got back from mission must have saw the one moment Xigbar towering over Demyx in a kiss. Axel smiled though and went along his way, not wanting to interrupt whatever it was Demyx was doing to find Roxas.

It now struck Demyx that he really should have paid more attention to the people he wanted attention from because in the end he might just receive it back. Demyx made a slight movement to go after Axel, but Xigbar held him in place as he wrapped his arms around the small waist of young man. Demyx looked back up at Xigbar unsure of what to do next.

"Xi-Xigbar, what are you-"

"What's the matter?" He tilted his head to his side as he pressed against Demyx more. "I thought to liked his sort of stuff?"

Demyx thought about just what 'stuff' was. Wasn't the whole reason he came to talk to Axel was that he could get something more out of the normal stuff? After a moment of thinking and not responding back to Xigbar, Demyx stiffened up when Xigbar ran his tongue along side his neck. His small hands went up to rest on the other man's shoulders to try and hold himself up with dignity...and failing. Xigbar's leather eyepatch rubbed the underside of Demyx's chin that sent odd shivers down the rocker's spin. Small gasps of uncertainty escaped, but they couldn't be helped as Demyx's heart raced faster within his rib cage.

Xigbar contained to nip and bite at the pale flesh before he chuckled to himself and pulled back slightly to look at Demyx. The boy's face was flushed yet a hint of anger was seen within the glaze green eyes. The few pacific stands of hair in front of his face dangled as he refused to look Xigbar in the eye. Xigbar's toothy grin showed upon his face as a better idea came to mind. He let Demyx go, but only for a second before grabbing him by the wrist and yanking him to walk with him (more like dragging behind him). Xigbar's own dark portal opened before them and before Demyx could protest, Xigbar explained,

"Let us continue this somewhere else..."

And with that Demyx was taken into the swirling darkness and they both left the gardens.

And to think that all this came from one little fan art. Lovely sigh yaoi. by Barnacle