Title: Of Dreams and Angels.
Category: Supernatural
Pairing: Sassy, Sam/Castiel.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Summary: Sam has Dreams. Drabble. Sassy. SLASH. Mid season 4
Sam knew it was wrong to have these thoughts, these dreams. He knew it was foolish to have these dreams given that Castiel or one of his kin have proven themselves not only capable but also willing to invade and manipulate a humans dreams at any given moment. That knowledge however did nothing to keep his subconscious mind from wondering late at night.
In the dream, Dean was never a factor. He loved his brother, of course he did, but for so many reasons pertaining to both himself and Castiel, Dean simply couldn't be a part of them. No, in his dreams it was just him and the Angel. Castiel would sometimes appear to him with an important message or some warning, Sam would listen of course, show concern but would ultimately be distracted by the movements of full lips forming words he could no longer hear. Lips that would stop moving when Cas would take note of the direction of Sam's gaze. He would move closer and place a hand on Sam's chest, look into his eyes with those beautiful sky blue orbs and ask him "What do you want" Sam would know intuitively that there would never exist the words to describe what he wanted. So he would simply take it.
As lips moved together, as bodies moved together he would finally feel that peace. The peace he had always associated with Angels, with God. The peace he no longer felt he would ever truly feel nor could ever truly deserve. But there, in the shadows of his mind he would feel it, or rather some distant silhouette of what he imagined it to be. There where different dreams, different directions taken that didn't matter in the end because they all led to that same path. The phantom of a sensation so desperately needed, so cruelly withheld and, upon waking, so bitterly missed.
When a part of the real world, the world where any form of peace and comfort really where a dream concept, being in the presence of Castiel twisted his insides into knots. Made him feel all the things he tried so hard to push away. The shame, guilt and self-loathing he had managed to build up over these last few months with Ruby would threaten to cripple him but he put it aside because of what needed to be done. He had always been good at that, burying feelings, positive or negative, for the greater good.
One day, a single aspect of his dream world made reality when he found himself alone with Castiel. The hunger inside of him, the desperation for Castiel to grant him the salvage the ghosts of his sleeping mind would remind him could only come from one source made him ask the question in the only way he could.
"How do I find peace" The tilt of the angels head and the pursing of his lips as though in curious thought where belayed by the knowing look in his eyes. Unable to speak out of fear? Love? Hate? He simply held the creatures eyes while he took the time to answer.
"I show you every night"