This story here is dedicated to AthanatosOra, who inspired me to write this. Her art and writing is awesome, so check out her blog on tumblr, people!
So, after reading chapter 92 of Bnha I simply couldn't sit quietly and watch the angst flood the fandom. (Mostly flood ME, for that matter.) I kind of decided on a whim "let's write that All Might survives!"
And that's how this piece came to be. Set after 92, AU, and a healthy mixture of angst, cheesiness and fluff. I hope the characters aren't too OOC – it's my first time writing them. The whole thing got a bit out of hand. It was supposed to be a short story about All Might and Izuku, but now there are other people in there to and the whole thing has got 13k words. But please, tell me your opinion if you should manage to read through all that rambling. XD
By the way, I'm German and it's not proofread yet, so if my English sounds weird, please remember that. Suggestions on how I could improve are greatly appreciated!
"It's too early for you to be here, Toshinori."
"No" he answered her. "No, it's not. Please, Sensei, let me stay."
A sigh right behind him had him whirling around. And there she was, dark hair and dark eyes, arms folded in front of her toned torso. There was regret in her eyes as well as pity.
He didn't want to see either. She should smile, like she taught him to. She should be fighting, not regretting.
She should be alive and well.
She was nothing of all that. Instead, she was a dream in his nights, a shadow of the past, and he knew it. Hell, even she knew that. That's where the pity in her gaze came from, right?
"Go back, Toshinori."
"I can't go back," he insisted. "I'm here, so that means I lost, right? And that means…"
"Stupid boy," she smiled at him, a shadow of her once beaming smile. This smile was coloured with bitterness. (Was that because of him?) "You didn't outright win. Doesn't mean you lost. And you didn't die, either."
"Then why am I here?"
"You can't tell? Because you wanted to be here. But now, it's time for you to go back. No sense in dwelling in the past all the time."
Something stirred inside him. He couldn't go back. There was… He was…
"I'm afraid, Sensei."
Again, a sigh and a smile that was a tad too bitter to be really hers. "Did I teach you nothing, my boy? Or have you simply forgotten? When we are afraid, when we are anxious, what do we do then?"
She said it as if it was easy. As if he just could go on with his new knowledge, with the fear and anger All for One had induced in him, and just… just…
"Because it is easy, Toshinori. And I know you can do it. So wake up already, you blockhead."
And just like that, she was gone and left him alone again…
… and he woke up with a start, disorientated and confused and crying, reaching out blindly in front of him in an attempt to stop her. To hold her close.
Sharp pain laced through his arm and the limb fell back down.
It hit a mattress – he lay on said mattress, he realised blurrily. He wasn't lying on hard, jagged stones anymore.
Above him and around him there was only white. White ceiling and white cushions and white blankets, tightly drawn around his natural form. Also white bandages, covering his entire arms and his torso, as far as he could see.
Still not sure where he was, he coughed and tried to lift his arm again. Only to realise that he didn't have control of his body. His vision was blurry and he could barely move a single muscle, let alone sit up. Frantically he tried to recall what had happened…
… All for One right in front of him, mocking him, pushing his powerless body around like a ragdoll. Talking, so much talking, filling him with anger and hatred and despair and…
"Shigaraki Tomura is the grandson of Shimura Nana."
There it was, the reason for his despair, for his hatred. He had been able to push it to the back of his mind during the fight, concentrating on what he had to do. But now it all came flooding back to him in full force, leaving him with the urge to scream, scream, scream, scream in agony…
"You defeated Tomura. So clueless, putting on a noble smile…"
He had hurt Nana's family, had hurt his beloved mentor's grandson without even realizing. Without even knowing that she had a grandson.
What a student he was! What a hero he was!
"That's weird, All Might. Where did your smile go?"
He had fought with everything he had got, that much he could remember. Had pushed his body and the remains of his quirk to their absolute limits and beyond, had collected all his power in a final punch, throwing it all at his enemy, and…
He couldn't remember what had happened after that.
He tried to speak, tried to call for someone. Someone had to be there, right?
But his voice broke, launching him into a coughing fit accompanied with blood in his mouth. Hacking and groaning, he wasn't even able to spit out the blood accordingly because he couldn't sit up.
"All Might!"
There was frantic movement in the corner of his vision. Moments later, there was Recovery Girl, lifting him up with surprising strength. The motion shot new sparks of pain through his body, but by sitting and leaning against a cushion, he could at least spit everything into a bowl the woman handed him.
It seemed to take hours until he could finally stop. By then, Toshinori felt more dead than alive, but at least he could breathe again. Still blinking blurrily, he focused on Recovery Girl.
"What… what happened?"
His voice sounded terrible, like his throat was made out of sandpaper and filled with shards of glass.
Recovery Girl had started whipping his forehead with a wet cloth at some point. He hadn't even realised it in his frenzy. Now, she slowed her movements down, gazing straight into his eyes.
There was something sad in her gaze, and he feared his heart would stop. Something terrible had happened. Something…
"The kids?" His voice got worse with his panic, but he had to ask. "Are they…?"
"They are fine", she assured him. "Really, none of them got injured. Save for the young Bakugou, but even he only had a few scratches. Wouldn't even let me take a look at them, that boy. They are fine."
"And… and the others? The heroes… Gran Torino?" he could remember how his mentor had been used as a shield, how his fist had connected with the older man's jaw. He remembered the sickening cracking sound that had followed, and it filled him with dread.
"I already healed Gran Torino. Apart from his jaw and the exhaustion, there wasn't anything to do for me, really. Don't worry about him." Recovery Girl reached over and patted his shoulder gingerly, minding his wounds. "His already in good shape again. Same goes for Mount Lady. The poor girl had her nose broken by those rascals, but other than that, most of the heroes got away mostly unscathed."
Relief started to build up in him, only to be crushed under the weight of her last sentence. "You said "most"."
Her movements next to him stilled, before she stood up and gathered fresh bandages, put away the blood filled bowl and came back to him. "I have to take a look at your wounds now. Make sure you didn't open them up with all that coughing."
"Chiyo."
He didn't often use her true name, and when he did, she knew she couldn't avoid the question any longer. Like now.
Recovery Girl sighed deeply. "Best Jeanist was impaled and thus knocked out by All for One. We had to put him in an artificial coma, until we could heal all the damage done to his body. He still hasn't woken up yet. And we're still not sure whether he still has his quirk or not."
He didn't know if he should be relieved or drown in guilt. The other pro hero seemed to be alive, but at what cost? The ones who had their quirk forcibly taken from them… most of them had gone crazy after that. Had he doomed his colleague to that fate with his rash actions?
"Don't even start thinking like that."
He looked up to see a fairly scary gaze direct right at him. He huffed without smiling, too tired for it. "Are you reading my mind?"
"I don't need a mindreading-quirk like that to know that you are blaming yourself. Stop that at once." Recovery Girl's intonation left no room for objections.
"Fine." He sighed, not sure if he could manage it. But there were more pressing matters he had to take care of. "What about All for One? Have I… Did I get him?"
He almost couldn't believe that he did. He was almost sure that he, in fact, didn't reach him. That it hadn't been enough, in the end.
There was a long pause before he got an answer.
"You sent him flying with your last attack. Straight through a couple of buildings, through half of the town, in fact." Recovery Girl busied herself with wetting the cloth in a bowl of water nearby, before she turned around again. "Tsukauchi and a handful of heroes set up search troupes, but none of them could find even a single hint of his whereabouts. It's like he has vanished into thin air after the fight."
Or teleported somewhere far away with the help of a stolen quirk.
Toshinori felt like a rug had been pulled out from under him. After everything, after he had used up all his power – All for One was still somewhere out there, alive and working on his next plan to induce the fall of the heroes.
Recovery Girl caught up on his brooding and sighed. "Now, don't look so troubled. With the wounds you gave him all those years ago and after that last fight, he won't be able to do anything for the time being. Really, it's a miracle he survived. There is even the possibility that he will die from the wounds…"
"We already thought that he had died six years ago." Toshinori croaked out. "It's more likely he survived with ease and is already preparing his next steps."
She didn't have to say anything to that. They both knew that Toshinori's rather dark prediction was quite likely true.
Toshinori would have balled his fists hadn't his arms been crushed not too long ago and were now unable to really move. He had the biggest chance they had had let slip through his finger. No, worse. He hadn't just let All for One get away, he had also endangered everyone who had followed him. Not to mention the civilians who had been caught up in their fight.
Before they had gone on the raid, he had felt invincible in his fury and with his colleagues beside him. He had even told his friend Naomasa how he would let the villains know that this raid was "payback". Marching straight into their hideout, rescuing Bakugou, and cutting of the connection to the Noumus. It had sounded like an easy win for the heroes, as they had outnumbered the villains by far.
Instead, he had walked straight into the trap All for One had set up for him.
"So clueless, putting on a noble smile…"
"Shut up!"
"I didn't say anything yet, All Might."
Toshinori stopped himself. He hadn't even realised that he had hissed the command out loud, talking to the voice that haunted him in his memories. Now he was confronted with Recovery Girl looking at him, suspicious and worried at the same time.
"I'm sorry." He murmured. "I wasn't talking to you. Just… remembering."
There was too much to remember all at once, he thought to himself.
As if she had read his mind, Recovery Girl sighed and dabbed at his forehead again. "Don't remember too much, you hear me? It doesn't do you any good."
"No blaming, no remembering." Toshinori muttered bitter. "Right. I will try that."
"Hm." She stepped back, disbelieve in her eyes and her frown, but she nodded anyway. "I will go and inform everyone that you're awake. Can I leave you alone for that long?"
"I am a grown man, you know. I can handle myself." He didn't feel like he could, really, but he wouldn't tell her that.
"Fine. I will be right back. Don't move around too much. And don't try to use your quirk yet. It could have a terrible influence on your wounds!" warned Recovery Girl.
"Right." Toshinori answered promptly, nodding all the while.
As soon as he was left alone, he concentrated and tried to tap into his quirk.
There was no reaction. No warmth flooded his body, stretching over his limbs and transforming them into something which could hold a power that had been cultivated and passed down through many generations. Instead of the steady warmth at the centre of his very being, there was a gaping void.
Even when he had lost most of his powers – at least that steady little flame had always been there, reminding him of the power he still possessed. Even after passing the torch down, he had felt it there, next to his heart.
Now, there was nothing.
Toshinori could feel a desperate sound build up in his throat and squeezed his eyes together tightly, teeth grinding together in his effort.
He was quirkless again.
He told Recovery Girl of his discovery the next time she visited him. It had been hardly an hour then, and he had had a bit time to gather himself again.
She didn't even scold him, although he had blatantly ignored her command. She didn't say anything at all. Instead, she took his hand in hers and held it lightly, mindful of his wounds.
The pity in her eyes almost shattered his heart.
The next one to visit him was Tsukauchi Naomasa.
He was somewhat surprised to see his friend here at his bed. After all, he had reckoned that the policeman would be busy with cleaning up the mess that the fight against All for One had created.
As Toshinori told Naomasa as much, his friend smiled tiredly at him. There were bags under his eyes, his hair was unkempt and he had gotten rid of his tie, leading to an uncharacteristic dishevelled look. "I'm on vacation. Couldn't leave a good friend alone in such a state, now could I? Only for a few days, though."
Toshinori uttered a surprised sound at that, shifting around uneasily. As grateful as he was, there was something he wanted to talk about. And yet, somehow, he wanted to avoid it at the same time. How to go about it, then?
He needn't have worried, he realized when he looked up.
Naomasa looked at him with a quiet sadness and understanding that said it all.
"She told you already." Toshinori deduced hoarsely.
"I'm sorry." The policeman answered quietly, sincerity in his words and his eyes. "I truly am."
Toshinori tried to smile reassuringly, but he failed terribly at it, he knew. Overly cheerful and in a broken voice he answered "No reason to be, really. You don't have to do anything with it. But tell me, how are things out there? The news have to be going around the globe already."
There was a flicker of something on Naomasa's face, before he had his expression under control. It had looked even worse than the pity.
"What?" Toshinori wasn't going to ignore it. He couldn't ignore it. "Naomasa, what happened? What did you find?"
"Find? No, it's… we didn't find anything yet. He simply vanished." Naomasa rubbed his face, trying to breathe deeply in and out, before he face him again. "It's not about All for One. It's about you."
"About me?" Dread welled up inside him, and he resisted the urge to shake his friend, tell him to hurry up already. "Tell me. I have to know."
Naomasa's eyes were full of pity again when he spoke. And there was that look again…
Oh.
Now Toshinori knew what that was.
It was resignation.
"Do you remember the helicopter above the battlefield, All Might?"
He did. Now that he heard it, he did, and he went pale at the memory. There had been a camera crew inside that helicopter… and if they still had been there after One for All had disappeared, then that would mean…
The look on Naomasa's face told him enough to know.
The camera had still been there, and his transformation had been live on every screen.
"All Mi-…"
"Can I… could you give me some time to think about this alone? Please."
Naomasa left him alone like he requested, not able to get Toshinori to speak again. Although he assured him that the civilians around the battlefield had cheered for All Might, even when his true form had been revealed, it wasn't enough for the hero.
Alone in the infirmary, Toshinori buried his face in his hand. He still wasn't able to stomach the realization that right now, everyone knew about his true form. Everyone knew that he had just put on a mask all this time.
His cover was blown, his secret laid bare to the world. For six long years, he had maintained the charade, had played the role of the unbroken and proud hero, strong as ever, shining as ever. Now all of that was gone, and his scrawny body and poor health was revealed to the world.
He didn't know what he should do from now on. He couldn't even pretend to be a hero anymore. The last fight had robbed him of another few years of his already short life, and also took away the precious time during which he could activate One for All.
Toshinori Yagi had survived the battle, but All Might hadn't had the same luck.
What remained was a quirkless and sick man, unable to fight. Even worse, unable to protect. And on top of that plagued by guilt and sorrow, and without any fight left in him.
He may have withstood the battle physically, but All for One had broken his spirit with only a few words.
"So clueless,…"
Who would set their trust in him when he was like this? Especially when the people would realise that he had played a role all this years. They would think of him as a liar, a fake. Who would see him as the symbol of peace, the pillar of the hero-society ever again?
He wouldn't be of use to anyone in this state. Not only had he made failures in the past without even realizing, now he couldn't even make it better in the future because he was to weak.
Toshinori shrank further into himself as one terrible thought made his way into his mind.
He was no hero.
He was just a disappointment.
After coming to that conclusion, Toshinori felt too tired and hollow for everything.
He didn't touch the food Recovery Girl brought him. Not because he was being "a sulky child", like Recovery Girl told him, but rather because he couldn't find any appetite.
He let the medical heroine rant about it all she wanted and simply rolled onto his right side and closed his eyes. Pretending to sleep.
(He didn't sleep, for whenever he closed his eyes, there was Nana's smile being swallowed up by a layer of blood and flames and All for One's mocking laughter overriding every happy memory he had of his mentor.)
"Where did your smile go, All Might?"
He didn't want to talk to his visitors, too. He didn't want to hear their consoling words or their questions about what he wanted to do from now on.
He simply didn't know the answer, so he remained silent.
That alone didn't stop his visitors, and in the days that followed, a few very persistent individuals made their appearances.
Nedzu assured him that he was still a teacher of U.A., and surely would still be accepted and respected among the students and his colleagues. He would always be welcome here, with or without One for All.
Toshinori ignored it because he simply couldn't believe the future heroes wanted to be taught by someone who couldn't even make his way to the classroom without vomiting blood.
Naomasa, never really believing that Toshinori was cut out for the job of a teacher, went as far as suggesting the job of a police officer.
Toshinori shrugged, but didn't respond, and his friend understood without words. How could the number one hero bear to watch from close up how the real heroes fought the villains while he himself was no longer able to help?
Gran Torino simply asked for his well-being, and after he didn't get a real answer, the older man started to console him. It sounded more like reprimanding, to be honest, but at least he tried.
"You may have broken my jaw," Gran Torino grunted, "Doesn't mean I will just leave you to vegetate here."
"I'm sorry," Toshinori answered, meaning the broken jaw.
After that, all of Gran Torino's questions, commands and almost-pleas couldn't change the fact that the conversation died down again.
Recovery Girl stubbornly tried to get him to talk or eat, ranting over him, cursing him. From time to time she informed him that his students had come by, wanting to see him.
"They are worried." She told him, gaze dark and reproachful. "They want to make sure you're alive and well. And they don't believe my mere words alone anymore."
He only shook his head and let her send the kids away again. They certainly didn't want to see him like this. What they wanted, what they needed to see after all the horror they had had to face, was All Might's wide, reassuring smile. Not some skeleton of a man who couldn't smile anymore.
Lastly, Recovery Girl's voice turned almost pleading. "At least the boy, All Might."
He went rigid at that, avoiding her gaze still. Knowing in an instant who she was talking about.
"Day after day, he shows up here and ask if he can see you. If youeven want to see him. He's worried sick, All Might. You have to talk to him. Assure him that you're fine."
And he broke his silence for that, croaking and almost groaning the words. "I wouldn't reassure him even one bit when he sees me in this state."
"And you think avoiding him is better? You of all people should know how it feels to lose a teacher – yeah, don't look at me like that!" The anger was back in her voice, and now there was no stopping her. Eyes flashing, she reprimanded him: "He feels like he is losing you, even when you are still alive. You know what you're doing to him with this behaviour and you know exactly how much it is paining him, you stubborn old idiot of a man. Just because you're ashamed of your looks or your powerlessness doesn't give you any right to hurt that boy, the same boy who adores you so much. Or are you so wrapped up in your own self-pity that you don't care for others anymore?"
"Of course I care! That's exactly why…!"
"That's quite enough of your ridiculous and childish behaviour!"
It had taken almost four days, but finally, Recovery Girl seemed to be fed up with him. Her last statement had been uttered quite loudly. Additionally she had slapped both hands on her desk's surface, almost sending Toshinori tumbling over the edge of the mattress out of shock.
But he stubbornly refused to move, only holding her gaze in a silent challenge.
In return, she pointed at him, declaring, "You're sulking like a little child, beating yourself up over the fact that you couldn't end the fight once and for all. Whining over the fact that you lost your quirk doesn't make it better, and mourning what is gone may be normal, but you have to stop already! Instead of wasting your time like this, you should stand up and show everyone that you are back. They are waiting for you, even if you don't believe that! So get moving, go out there and finally smile again, for you are here and you are alive!"
Only that he didn't feel alive. He felt hollow and too old. He felt useless.
He felt like a failure.
Perhaps she could see that in his eyes.
Perhaps that was the reason why she gave up the starring contest in favour of declaring coldly: "I will go and fetch the boy. Let's see if that doesn't wake you up."
Toshinori almost jumped at that, opening his mouth to call out to her and stop her. However, by then the door had already closed behind her.
And he was left alone, fearing who would step through that same door next.
He couldn't face him, of all people. Not in this state. Not yet, not like this.
Though it didn't seem like he could avoid that meeting.
When Recovery Girl entered next, she seemed to be alone. Relief flooded Toshinori, and he even dared to sit up in his bed, feeling save to do so.
His hopes were thwarted in an instant. Recovery Girl shot him a look between reproachful and triumphant, only to turn to the half-open door again. Loudly she called, "Now, don't be shy. Come on in! You wanted to see him, too, didn't you?"
"Yes! Um, but, I don't want to disturb, so… I should probably come again when All Might is really alright with it?" the all-too familiar voice quivered slightly, hope and worry mixed in it.
Toshinori froze mid-motion, sending the woman a glare. She had really done it, then. Gone and called for that person he didn't dare facing yet.
Recovery Girl met his gaze unwaveringly and hissed only for him to hear, "Your behaviour is ridiculous, I hope you know that!"
"He shouldn't have to see me like this!" he hissed back.
"I don't think he will have a problem with it. The only one with a problem here is you. Now, don't' say such nonsense, my boy!" at the last sentence she spoke louder, all the while opening the door fully. "He will be happy to see you in no time."
"O-okay, then." Izuku shuffled in shyly, shoulders hunched and gaze unsteadily flickering through the room.
But as soon as he saw Toshinori sitting there, his face brightened in an instant and he blurted out: "You're awake! I'm so glad!"
The earnest statement was a stab to the heart for Toshinori. But even that couldn't lift the corners of his mouth up into a smile. Feeling too old altogether, he greeted simply "Hello, my boy."
Instantly the light on the boy's face dimmed considerably, and his shoulder tensed again.
Toshinori cursed himself silently. Of course his protégé would see in a matter of seconds that he was in bad shape.
The look that Recovery Girl threw his way was a reprimand in itself. Instead of answering it or excuse himself, he focused his gaze on the blanket that covered his legs. He had said so from the start – this meeting was a bad idea.
A clapping sound almost had him looking up, but he suppressed the urge.
"I will leave you two alone for a bit. I still have work to do that doesn't concern this one stubborn top hero. Make yourself at home here, boy, don't be shy. All Might, you behave yourself!" Recovery Girl commanded, before she closed the door behind her and left them alone.
There was a rather awkward pause. Neither of them knew what to do now, or where to begin.
In the end, Izuku hesitantly took a seat in the office chair Recovery Girl always used and wheeled himself closer to the bed. Carefully, he leaned forward, as if he was expecting to be attacked when he moved to fast. "All… All Might? Are you… feeling better? A little bit, at least?"
Toshinori almost couldn't bear the worried gaze that was boring into the side of his head. He had to do something. Convince Izuku that everything was alright, before the boy noticed that it certainly wasn't alright.
His sat up straighter and extended his arms, startling the boy so much that he almost jumped off the chair.
"Don't worry, my boy!" Toshinori tried to put on a smile, in spite of the effort it cost him. Flexing his arm slightly, ignoring the searing pain in it, he bluffed, "Such a little setback can't hold a good man down! So no need to look so worried…"
The next coughing fit destroyed his charade effectively. Leaning forward, he gagged and coughed up blood, trying to hold it back with his hands. The blood-spewing and coughing had only intensified after the last battle, and each fit left him aching and tired.
He was dimly aware of a shout and frantic rustling beside him. In a matter of seconds, Izuku handed him the readied bowl from his nightstand, which he thankfully took.
He sat like that for what seemed like an eternity, trying not to suffocate. All the while embarrassed by the thought of what an impression he must make like this.
Finally, it was over. Toshinori wheezed with each breath, but at least he had gotten rid of all the blood in his throat and mouth.
Izuku pried the filled bowl out of his trembling hands, silently passing him a tissue instead. Still saying nothing, the boy stood up and went to wash out the bowl in the sink.
Whipping his mouth, Toshinori spoke quietly. "Sorry you had to see this."
No chance left to convince the boy that he was alright after this.
The water was turned off abruptly. Izuku dried his hand a bit too roughly, before putting the bowl aside and taking his seat again. Until then, he had not once looked at his mentor. Now however, he met his gaze head on and said, "Don't. Don't be sorry. You have no reason to be."
Something about his intonation gave Toshinori the feeling that the boy wasn't talking about the coughing alone. There was something else Izuku had been thinking about while he spoke.
No choice. He had to ask when he wanted to know, else there would stand a misunderstanding between them the whole time.
Choosing his words very carefully, he tried to coax the boy into speaking. "Whatever do you mean, my boy?"
There was some fidgeting on Izuku's part. Rubbing his neck and jaws working, the boy searched for words.
Toshinori waited patiently. He knew well enough that his student needed time to gather courage sometimes, but would come around as soon as he was ready.
"Before I came here, Gran Torino told me… He told me about your mentor."
That sent a jolt through Toshinori. Izuku knew. He knew about Nana Shimura, he knew about All Might's mentor. That meant he probably also knew about Nana's grandson.
And that would mean Izuku also knew that not even he, Toshinori, hero number one, had been able to hinder All for One from killing Nana. That he hadn't been able to protect her grandson – her family - either.
He had disappointed Nana, had disappointed himself. Disappointed the society he had sworn to protect.
And probably worst of all, now Izuku would be disappointed in him as well.
Somehow Toshinori couldn't stomach that last thought.
While he tried to gather his thoughts again before they could spiral too far down, Izuku continued: "He told me her name. That she was your mentor, and you learned everything about being a hero from her. Also... that she died. He told me that… that she had a grandson. Shigaraki. And that beating him is one of the reasons why you… why you don't want to eat, or talk with anyone. Because you feel guilty."
There it was. So he truly knew all of it. Toshinori continued to avoid the boy's gaze, not able to face the disappointment in his eyes.
Izuku paused, searching for words. Even without looking Toshinori could imagine how the boy would wring his hands together in an effort to form his next sentences. He knew that child so well, he could even fathom how the lines on his forehead would deepen in thought, how he would bite the inside of his cheeks. How he would deeply breathe before he started to speak, like he did now.
Nevertheless Izuku's next words took him by utter surprise.
"After he told me that… I told him I didn't want to hear anything more about it."
For the first time since Izuku sat down, Toshinori looked up and really searched for the boy's gaze.
He didn't find the disappointment he had expected.
Instead he was met with warmth and happiness and sadness, sorrow and hope and everything mixed together in those green eyes. The underlying shyness which the boy usually displayed around his great idol had completely vanished. Izuku held his gaze firmly and without even the tiniest hint of a blush on his cheeks.
Upon realizing that he had finally gained Toshinori's full attention again, Izuku smiled. A bit watery around the edges, but beaming nonetheless.
And Toshinori didn't understand in the least. Izuku, the most curious fanboy, the most curious person he had ever met, didn't want to know one of his greatest secrets?
"Why?"
His own voice sounded strange to him. He had always talked a tad hoarse after his first fight against All for One. Even worse after the fight only days ago. But now strain and confusion added a whole new layer and that one word came out like the screeching sound of stone against metal.
Again Izuku didn't seem to care about little things like that. His smile only grow, a bit wavering, as he answered. "Because it's not his story to tell. It's yours. I want to hear it from you and nobody else."
The words hit their mark. Some of the iron control Toshinori had had on his emotions until now loosened, but he couldn't let it go yet. He couldn't talk about it yet.
It hurt too much.
He gulped, trying to swallow the well-known blood as well as the lump forming in his throat. "What… what if I don't want to talk about it?"
"Then you don't have to." Izuku made it sound so simple. "I won't force you, I won't even wait for you to tell me. I just… I will just…"
The flow of words staggered, then stopped. Some of the natural anxiety of the boy returned as he fidgeted and cringed a little under Toshinori's stare. He breathed in deeply to calm himself and continued: "I will just be there, I think. In case you… in case you decide you want to talk about it. I… I hope that will be enough, and that it's okay with you…"
Towards the end, Izuku fell back into his habit of mumbling the words. This time though, Toshinori heard him clearly. Almost too clearly.
The boy had come here to wake him up from his stupor, and yet, he didn't pressure him at all. He tried to give him the time he needed.
Really, with what had he deserved this student of his?
It made it so much harder to tell him the full truth.
"My boy," he began, and Izuku perked up instantly, quiet hope in his eyes.
He almost regretted that he had to continue. There wouldn't be much hope left when he had finished his explanation.
"Feeling guilty is only one of the reasons I'm… not feeling like myself at the moment." He worded it carefully, but the both knew it was a harsh understatement.
His next words weren't easy to bring forth, but he had to. The boy needed to hear every last bit of it. Better now and from him, than later and from someone else.
"I'm most likely not able to use One for All anymore, my boy."
Admitting it loudly and in front of someone to hear it left a bitter taste in his mouth. But he had to say it. Probably the boy didn't know yet that he had lost his quirk. Didn't know that he couldn't be All Might anymore.
At least that would explain why his protégé still looked at him with such open admiration and warmth in his eyes.
Again he was surprised by the answer he received. "I heard already."
Toshinori was reduced to starring yet again. Then why, pray tell, didn't the look in those green eyes change in the slightest while locking on him?
Izuku fidgeted nervously under the inquiring gaze and shifted in his seat. "Um… I heard principal Nedzu and Aizawa-sensei talk about it. I didn't mean to overhear them! It just, kinda, um, happened? However, they also said you will be healthy enough to teach again… if you wanted to."
His words slowed while he talked, and his forehead wrinkled slightly. Lost in thought, he stopped his nervous movements and said carefully, "They said "if you wanted to". So… you don't want to teach us anymore?"
Now there was a change in the boy's eyes, and it threatened to break something inside Toshinori's chest. Izuku looked at him like he had wounded him physically, shock and disbelieve mixed into it those green, green eyes.
Deflating under that gaze, Toshinori had to look away and collect himself before he could answer. "I am thinking about quitting the job, yes."
"But… why?" Until now, Izuku had been collected, not letting any stronger emotions show on his face or in his voice. Now however his voice almost broke as he rushed out, "Did we do something wrong? Is it because we rushed into danger to save Kacchan? Or something else? What…"
Toshinori's head whipped around and he croaked out, "No!"
Izuku sat silent, eyes pleading for an answer as he was stopped in his questions.
With a pained groan Toshinori lifted his hand and rubbed over his eyes in exhaustion. "You and the other students didn't do anything wrong in the least, my boy. The problem is me."
That only caused Izuku's brows to furrow in something akin to alarm. "You? I don't understand…"
"I already told you: I'm not able to be a hero anymore."
"Because of your quirk. But you will be healthy enough to teach, yes?" Izuku insisted stubbornly. "And you're still the symbol of peace. You're still you."
Toshinori would have smiled, ruefully at least, if the subject wasn't so bitter. "My boy, do you think someone wants to be taught anything by me while I look like this? I hardly resemble the hero your class deserves for a teacher. I won't even be able to teach a full lesson like this. Additionally, I hardly resemble a symbol of peace in this state."
Something in Izuku's eyes flashed, and his shoulders squared themselves. He sat straighter, wrinkles on his brows and his hands balled into loose fists. It seemed like the boy came to an understanding as he spoke, getting louder with each word, "That's what you're worried about? That's it? You think we care about your looks that much? Then you are wrong, because we don't."
Perplexed by that outburst, Toshinori blinked a few times before he started "My boy…"
Again, he was interrupted.
"You lost your quirk. And just like that, you're just… giving up? Is that the reason why you won't smile anymore?"
"Smile? I…"
Izuku didn't even seem to hear him anymore. The boy pushed forward, not minding Toshinori's feeble attempts: "Since you're awake, you haven't eaten, nor have you slept as much as you should. Recovery Girl told me! Gran Torino told me! Even Tsukauchi-san talked to me, even if he hardly knows me! You should worry about your health, and get better, but instead you're worrying about how you look!
To us, it doesn't matter that you won't be able to fight anymore. All Might is not all about fighting, right?" Izuku's hands started to quiver with emotions. The boy had talked himself into a frenzy. A dam had been broken, and now the words purred out like water. "All Might is also a symbol of peace! A symbol of strength! And that's not because of your looks or your physical strength. It's because of what you do, of what you are!"
There was no chance for Toshinori to interrupt or to disagree.
Partly because Izuku was talking so much and so fast, he didn't even have an opportunity to get his own thoughts into the discussion.
And mostly because he was awed by that boy in front of him. The earnest words were full of heartfelt emotion and power, and there was no hesitation in Izuku left. It went straight to his heart, witnessing how much he meant to his student.
"And most of all, we need you here! You're our teacher! You're our inspiration! Our hero!" by now, Izuku was breathing raggedly. Tears were choking him, Toshinori could hear it. The boy's voice got smaller again, until he almost whispered his next words, head hanging between his shoulders as all fight seemed to leave him. "You're my hero."
There was silence after that. Toshinori tried and failed to find any words to say. It warmed his heart and broke it at the same moment, to see so much respect and adoration directed at him. Yet, he wasn't sure if he really could live up to the boy's expectations in the state he were now…
Again, it was Izuku's voice that broke through his thoughts. He had to strain his ears to catch all of it, but the words itself held a power in them that rivalled One for All.
"Whenever I were alone, or scared, or felt powerless, I remembered." Izuku balled his hands into white-knuckled fists. "Whenever I wanted to give up and run, I remembered, and smiled, and thought That's what All Might would do. He would smile in the face of danger."
And Toshinori remembered, too. Not only did he remember how he once told the boy to smile when he was anxious, no, he also remembered his confession that he often smiled to disguise his own fear. Something that Nana had taught him, and which he had never forgotten, never had stopped.
"But now, you don't smile anymore. Worse, you give up without even really trying"
The sadness in that statement almost broke him, but still, Toshinori didn't know what to say to that. It was true. Every word was true.
Breathing deeply, the boy sat hunched over for a moment. Forehead furrowed in deep thought, he hesitated.
Toshinori could hear him mumble something, but didn't catch it. He didn't dare to ask, either.
Then Izuku looked up from his shaking hands. His jaw was set, his eyes hard.
And the hero realized: He had seen that look in those green eyes time and time again.
Izuku wasn't preparing for a fight anymore.
He was prepared to win this. He had found a way to win and had the goal right in front of his eyes.
"I said I didn't want to ask about your mentor. And I told you that I didn't hear anything more from Gran Torino. That's not exactly true."
Dread welled up in Toshinori' at that unexpected revelation. What else had the boy heard?
Determined gleam in his eyes, Izuku finished: "There is that one thing he told me about that I wanted to try out."
Toshinori didn't even dare to breathe too loudly as Izuku lifted his hands to his face, index fingers pointing up and…
His heart almost stopped as he realised what the boy was doing. He wanted to scream, to look away, and to hug that brave, brave boy. He wanted to laugh and cry, everything and nothing at once. But he couldn't move a muscle. Could only wait and stare.
Izuku pressed his fingers to his own cheeks, pushing the corner of his mouths up into a smile. There were tears in the corners of his eyes, which were squeezed together, but that didn't stop him. Leaning his head a little to one side he smiled only a tad forced and explained with a quivering voice: "You once told me I should smile, especially when I'm anxious or scared. You also said you smile to disguise the fear inside yourself. And now… now I know that this is something you have learned from your mentor."
Toshinori couldn't find words in him, not spoken words nor thoughts. He sat still like a stone, not able to move or make a sound.
The smile in front of him was painfully reminding him of Nana's smile. That was her signature move, whenever she had wanted to cheer him up when he had failed or had felt hopeless. Gran Torino had obviously told Izuku about it with the thought in mind that the boy would show it to him.
It hit him like nothing else could have.
"I didn't get the chance to meet her." Izuku's voice was breaking again, and the sound of it brought Toshinori back from his reminiscing. The boy was still smiling at him. Only that the smile was slowly slipping out of place the longer the hero did not react to it. A slight tremor shook his hands. Nonetheless Izuku pressed on: "I don't know much about Shimura-san, but I can guess two things. One: She was truly amazing, as a teacher, as a hero and as a person. And two: She may be gone, but I'm sure that one of the things she would have wanted the most is to see you smile."
"Remember, Toshinori? No matter how scared you are, keep on smiling!"
"Or perhaps I think so because that's what I want to see. See you smile again. That's what we all want, really. So please… I beg of you." Izuku choked on the words and his upcoming tears, swallowing before ending: "Please smile again, All Might."
It felt like a punch to the stomach. All air left him in a soft gasp as memories of Nana and Izuku flooded his mind, whirled around and overlapped.
"I want to save people with a smile that knows no fear! Just like you!"
"Smile, Toshinori! Because the one who smiles is the strongest!"
And finally, finally, he could understand and accept fully what Izuku had tried to tell him since coming here.
To Izuku, it really didn't matter how he looked or if he was still able to do heroic things at all.
He wasn't a fake, a disappointment or anything like that to that boy.
To his student, there was no difference between All Might and Toshinori, because the both of them were just two different forms of the same man.
The man Izuku still wanted to have as a mentor.
The man Izuku held dear.
Izuku just wanted to see him alive and well, wanted to see him smile again.
And really, Toshinori thought, wouldn't it have been the same for him if the roles were reversed? It wouldn't matter to him if Izuku would lose his quirk, as long as the boy was fine.
Toshinori was barely able to close his mouth, let alone breathe again. He could only stare at the boy before him in wonder. At that troublesome, impossible little genius of a protégé he had. That boy who already had saved him, the greatest hero, more times than he could care to count. That boy who made him so proud and had him worried and had him laughing all at the same time.
That boy who was saving him again at that moment, with that forced looking smile on his face.
Finally Toshinori couldn't hold back anymore. A smile grew on his face, turned to a wide grin, until he was literally shaking with suppressed laughter. It hurt like hell, laughing while wounded like this, but he didn't care. He couldn't care. There were pent up emotions raging inside him. Despair over remembering his mentor, disappointment in himself, anger and hate for All for One, sadness, confusion, … and finally, there was that little hope, that little laughter Izuku had just gifted him with. Once flowing, the flood of feelings overflowed and it turned all into laughter, first suppressed, then freely ringing through the room. Loud laughter, exploding out of his mouth, bringing little waves of blood with it.
Once it started, he couldn't stop it.
Perhaps it bordered on insanity.
Perhaps he should have cared about that.
But he didn't.
"You're laughing! You're laughing again!"
Toshinori still couldn't stop laughing, nearly crying by that time and under those different emotions, but he managed to look up at that excited statement nonetheless.
Izuku was grinning back at him, fingers still slightly upholding the corners of his mouth. There were tears glistening in the corners of his eyes.
It looked… it looked…
Toshinori wheezed the words out without thinking: "You look utterly stupid, my boy."
There was silence for a moment. For a second he feared that he had probably hurt the boy's feelings with that careless statement.
But then Izuku spoke, his voice wavering with feelings, broken with underlying tears and outright laughter. "I do not!"
It didn't sound angry at all. In fact, the boy seemed happier than ever. So Toshinori risked it and shot back: "Of course you do! Truly like the prince of the idiot kingdom!"
"That again?" Izuku let his hands drop down, didn't need them anymore because of the wide smile that nearly split his face. "How did you even think up that name?"
"What, you don't think it fits perfectly?"
"No! But I think…" Izukus grin turned cheeky, a look he had never shown before in front of his mentor. Toshinori registered it with amazement. "I think if you really insist on calling me that, it would only be fair if I would name you the king of the same kingdom."
Toshinori's laughter stopped short at that. He looked at Izuku, mouth falling open in shock and surprise at the boldness of the boy. Izuku looked back at him just as shocked, his smile slowly disappearing and eyes growing wide like saucers as he realised that he just teased All Might right back, oh my god!
For a moment they sat both frozen. Then Toshinori couldn't suppress a chuckle anymore, which quickly morphed into the next fit of laughter. Soon Izuku's clear voice joined his own hoarse one, and moments later the both of them were almost doubling over in their respective seats.
It took Toshinori almost ten minutes to stop and catch his breath again. By that time some wounds at his side were slowly soaking the bandages red with blood and his chest and throat burned, and Izuku was crying through his smile.
The last realization sobered Toshinori up like nothing else. Alarmed he coughed into his hand and croaked out: "What's wrong, my boy?"
"N-Nothing!" Izuku's voice broke again, and he hiccupped helplessly. His laughter was completely gone by now and he was outright sobbing. His shoulders were no longer shaking with giggles, but with sobs. Nonetheless he insisted. "I'm… I'm fine, really!"
Toshinori raised his hands, ignoring the painful stab that gesture brought him, but stopped short. He didn't know what was wrong, or what he should do. All he could do was stating, clearly at his wits' end, "You certainly don't look fine."
"But I am! Really, I am!" Rubbing his eyes and leaning back in his seat to stop the flow of tears, Izuku blurted out: "I'm just so glad!"
Before he could question that explanation, Toshinori was met with Izuku's tearful gaze and stopped dead in his tracks as the boy stammered out: "I'm so happy you're okay! The whole time you were fighting, the whole time you were sleeping, I… I wanted to come and help you and after… I wanted to see you, to make sure that you… but Recovery Girl said you needed the rest and… and that she would call me as soon as possible, but it wasn't soon enough… I was so scared! I was so scared you would… you could… I'm so happy you didn't die!
The whole speech came flooding out in a rush and Toshinori's head should have been spinning by the end of it. Except it didn't. He understood, rush or not, and it broke his heart a little (a lot, honestly), hearing the sorrow and honest relief in the boy's voice and seeing his tears.
Tears over him.
Izuku had been doomed to watch the fight, doomed to wait for him to wake up. Doomed to pray that his mentor would finally let him in, let him speak to him. And after all that, the boy had heard that Toshinori had given up.
How much had the boy been hurting through all this?
Too much, certainly. And it was Toshinori's fault.
Time to redeem himself a bit.
"My boy." Toshinori began, stopped himself and tried again. "Izuku."
The boy's tears slowly subsided at the sound of his first name. Izuku hiccupped once, twice, snuffling a little, before he finally looked up again. There were still more tears, but they didn't flow. Yet.
Carefully, minding his wounds, Toshinori lifted his arms and spread them as far as he could. It wasn't much, but he hoped Izuku would understand it nonetheless.
And he did. Izuku's eyes turned wide yet again as he understood the gesture – then, there was no stopping it. Toshinori had only little time to steel himself as the boy came surging forward with incredible speed, straight into his arms.
Somewhere far away, he was dimly aware that Izuku's chair fell to the ground with a loud clatter, but he couldn't have cared less about it.
He didn't need to fear pain, honestly. Despite his speed, Izuku didn't forget the wounds on the hero's body even for one second. Mindful of them, he threw his arms around the scrawny blond man and buried his face in the crook of his neck, holding as strong onto him as he dared to, clinging onto him for dear life.
Toshinori breathed out shakily and returned the hold. His hands and arms were burning under the strain of bones that were crushed and healed not so long ago, but he didn't care. Only now he realised: He needed to hold the boy as much as the boy needed to hold him. He needed to feel that little body, breathing and shaking and so much alive.
He needed to know that there still was someone, living and breathing, who would smile back at him with the same warmth Nana always had…
No, that wasn't it.
Izuku wasn't Nana. There were some resemblances, but even Toshinori could see the differences between the two. He had never seen Izuku as a replacement for his beloved teacher, and he never would.
He was just glad to have Izuku as his student, and perhaps even as something akin to a friend.
He was truly lucky to have met that boy.
There was a sniffle, stifled by his shoulder, reminding him that said boy still held on tight to him. The tears had stopped, but the little body was still shaking under emotions.
Trying to cheer him up a bit, Toshinori joked, "Really now. Can we do anything without making a complicated mess out of it?"
Izuku gave a gurgling laugh at that and only squeezed him a bit tighter. Most likely to hide his own blush. "Don't think so."
"Although it was mostly my own fault this time."
"It wasn't."
Toshinori gave a fond little smile at that. "No need to defend me all the time, Izuku."
"I want to, though." Izuku burrowed deeper into the hug, as if to prove his point.
"Of course you do, little hero." Toshinori murmured softly.
It didn't seem like the boy heard him. If he had, he would be blushing and flailing his arms by now, spluttering in embarrassment. The mental image alone had new laughter bubbling up Toshinori's throat, but he suppressed it. It would only rouse questions, and he didn't want to let go of Izuku right now.
Carefully freeing one arm from the hug, the man whipped at Izuku's right cheek, trying to catch the lingering wetness there.
Satisfied with his results he commented, "We need to do something about these tears of yours. You're eyes are leaking so much, one could call you a cry-baby."
"Didn't you cry yourself, if only a little?" the boy sniffed, words nasal but with underlying humour in them.
"That was mostly because you launched yourself at me." Toshinori teased softly, secretly whipping away his own few tears. "The impact made me tear up."
He could feel Izuku smile against his shoulder. Nonetheless, the boy protested in a voice rough from tears, "You invited me to."
"That I did. Didn't think you would put so much force behind a simple hug, though."
"I didn't use force at all."
"Are you sure? It was almost more than this old man could handle."
"You're not old!"
"I certainly feel that way at the moment. Can't even sit up without groaning like an old man."
Izuku chuckled at that, his warm breath fanning out over the man's shoulder and neck in the process. Not minding the sensation, Toshinori carefully patted the unruly mop of green hair and smiled slightly. He was glad to see the boy smile again, without tears right behind the happiness.
They sat like this for a bit longer, Izuku occasionally squeezing a bit tighter while Toshinori never stopped rubbing his back or patting his head. Silently reassuring the boy that he wouldn't go anywhere. A silent Don't worry, for I am here.
Finally, it was the boy who broke the silence again.
"It really doesn't matter to me that you can't use One for All anymore." admitted Izuku softly, repeating his declaration and confirming Toshinori's earlier thoughts. "It really doesn't. You're still my hero. And you still have to teach me so much more. And the others are waiting for you, too. So please… stay at U.A."
That went straight to his heart yet again. Throat constricted from tears that threatened to spill over, Toshinori only squeezed the boy a little bit tighter in answer, trying to catch his breath again.
All those hours and days he had spent brooding over what to do from now an. Not deeming himself able to be a hero or a teacher ever again.
And yet, here was his student, his personal protégé and successor, practically begging him to stay his teacher.
Was there a way? Even a single way to say No to that?
He certainly didn't see one. He certainly didn't want one anymore.
After swallowing the lump in his throat, Toshinori even managed a little laugh and assured him, "Don't worry, as soon as Recovery Girl gives me the signal, I'm up and about and teaching again. I think she's on the verge of literally kicking me out of the infirmary anyway, so it shouldn't take that long."
"Yes, Recovery Girl said so…" Izuku's voice got smaller and smaller, before he stopped with a soft "Oh".
There was a moment of silence, during which Toshinori already had the feeling that he should take cover or something similar defensive.
Then, hell broke loose.
Or let's say, Izuku broke loose.
"Aaaah!" with a loud scream, Izuku reared back, out of Toshinori's hold, almost flinging himself to the ground in the process. The abrupt motion had Toshinori losing his balance and he would have fallen over hadn't he gripped the mattress beneath him tightly.
His heart hammered in his chest. Even when his gut feeling had already warned him, such a reaction was… certainly unexpected.
He shot Izuku a sharp look, silently questioning his behavior.
Upon seeing the confused gaze of his mentor, the boy stopped short, half standing and half hovering in front of the bed. Arms flailing like a little windmill, he spluttered: "I told Recovery Girl I would come and fetch her as soon as you were up and talking again! That… I completely forgot! And now I was here for so long and she's probably waiting and…!"
Toshinori recovered from his confusion as he understood and chuckled lightly. "She won't be happy that you left her waiting."
"Don't remind me!"
"Not happy at all," teased the man further. "Really, really not happy at all."
"You're doing this on purpose," groaned Izuku, although he couldn't help but grin a little. "She will want to examine your wounds as soon as she hears that you opened some of them up."
"Do me a favour then and don't be quick about fetching her."
That got a laugh from the boy, who was already jogging towards the door, spluttering all the while explanations for his leaving: "Anyway, I really have to go and get the others now. Tsukauchi-san is also waiting for news from you, and Aizawa-sensei won't be happy when I miss my next lessons without giving an excuse for it, and Uraraka also asked for you, oh, and the others asked too, of course…"
"Sounds like you are busy." Toshinori interrupted, still smiling, "Off you go, then."
Izuku stopped short, only one step away from the door. His shoulders shook, fell and squared themselves. For a moment, Toshinori honestly feared the boy would start crying again, as overwhelmed with his emotions as he clearly was.
But then Izuku whirled around and smiled as widely as he could, beaming like a little sun. "I will be right back, I promise!"
Warmth flooded Toshinori at that, and he couldn't help but answer: "I will hold you to that."
Izuku laughed, waved and was out the door in a blink.
He left warmth and a smile on the greatest hero's face behind. Toshinori shook his head, feeling hollow again after all the pent up emotions had exploded in laughter, after Izuku had left. Tired and hurting and hollow.
But this time, it was not in a bad way. It was a relief, really.
With a silent groan he leaned back, lying back into the soft cushions. He would sleep until his next visitors made their appearance. Get some rest. Hopefully he would be spared the nightmares this time.
And, so he told himself with a smile, already drifting off, when he would wake up the next time, there would be his friends and his students waiting for him.
"Back again, Toshinori?"
This time, he turned around with a smile on his face and laughter in his heart, feeling lighter than ever. "Only for a little while, Sensei."
"And just like that, you no longer want to stay here with me. How things can change." She laughed heartily and as loud as he remembered, before she sobered up a little. Dark eyes squinted at him, taking in his appearance with a hint of worry. "You will be fine this time? Going back and all? Without me?"
He didn't need to think twice. He could answer honestly, thinking of a boy who smiled like the sun, like her, and who gave him hope like no other. Made him proud and happy like no one else. Thinking also of friends who fought for him, students who waited for him. Thinking of all the things he wanted to protect.
And he smiled. "Yeah. Yeah, I will be fine. I will still miss you, but I will be smiling, and I will be fine. Like you wanted me to."
There was laughter around him and warmth, the feeling of a hug from strong and familiar arms. The worry was blown away as she ruffled his hair and sent him off a final time: "Now that's my boy! Off you go, then!"
"Didn't you say he was awake?"
"He was when I left…"
"Probably fell asleep again right away, that lazy guy."
"Probably…"
"And you're sure he was alright when you left, Midoriya?"
Familiar voices woke him, carefully whispered words somewhere off to the sides. He couldn't help but smile at the sound. He had a lot of smiles to catch up anyway, so he couldn't bring himself to stop right now.
Blinking, he pushed himself up in his cushions, focusing on his surroundings fully. "The lazy guy is wide awake and well, Naomasa, so stop pestering my boy."
His visitors looked up from where they had examined the machines which took note of his vitals, startled by his voice.
Izuku positively beamed at him, forcing Toshinori's smile to widen. He would have waved or said some greeting, had not another coughing fit interrupted him. Sharp pain shot through him and he had to catch blood in his palm yet again.
He wouldn't get rid of the blood-spitting anytime now, would he?
In the blink of an eye, Recovery Girl was at his side, lightly pressing a stethoscope against his rips. All the while she muttered something along the lines of "Only trouble with you", but smiled nonetheless, rubbing suspiciously at the corner of her eyes with her free hand. Louder she said, "At least you're up and talking again, instead of starring wholes into thin air and refusing to eat."
"Sorry for causing you trouble," murmured the hero faintly only for her to hear it. Only after seeing how hurt Izuku had been, he understood fully how much he had worried the people who cared for him. He had been so wrapped up in his own pain that he hadn't cared for them like he would have otherwise. Like he should have. Now guilt restricted his throat at the thought of causing so much trouble.
He would apologize to every single one of them personally, he promised silently.
The elderly woman shot him a dark look and slapped the back of his head. "Instead of apologizing, you could take care of yourself better in the future. It would save me some time and some worry at that."
Grinning sheepishly, Toshinori rubbed the back of his head gingerly. He would take that as forgiveness, at least from her. Still he answered, "Yes, ma'am."
Seemingly satisfied with that she stepped back from his bed and declared, "What you need now is some healthy food. I'm going to prepare something for you. After that I will check your wounds again. You opened some of them up already. Whatever did you do to manage that?"
Toshinori glanced at Izuku, happy to see the boy blushing and fidgeting upon remembering the laughter they had shared.
To Recovery Girl he only shrugged, "I can't really think of something that could have managed that. I did nothing harmful or overexerting."
She didn't believe him and caught sight of the blushing boy as well. Though she didn't say anything about it, Toshinori could have sworn there was a smile playing on her lips.
She left them alone, reminding him yet again to be careful with his wounds. He reassured her countless times that he would be careful, wouldn't overexert himself and that he certainly was hungry and would eat everything she brought him.
After the door closed behind her, there were only Naomasa and Izuku left to deal with.
Toshinori didn't quite dare to meet the eyes of his old friend. The policeman hadn't talked or moved since he had spoken up upon waking, only starring as if he had seen a ghost. His expression didn't give a hint on his feelings. Was he angry? Relieved? Confused? Toshinori couldn't tell, and that scared him.
Izuku on the other hand seemed to know it was not yet his turn to speak. The boy looked back and forth between the two men, then took a tentative step back. Obviously he could feel there was something the two of them needed to talk about, and Toshinori really was grateful yet again for the boy's insightfulness.
Coughing slightly he risked it and started, "I'm really sorry, Naomasa."
That sent a jolt through the policeman as if he had been deep in thought up until now. Blinking a few times, he shook his head and, surprisingly, smiled honestly. "Don't be. It's good to have you back, All-… Toshinori."
It wasn't what he had expected. His old friend should have been angry, at least, for all the worry he had caused. For the bad treatment he had given him. Instead he just accepted it and was happy to see him.
He had truly found an amazing friend in Tsukauchi Naomasa, Toshinori thought to himself while he smiled back. "It's good to be back."
The smile on the dark haired man's face turned a tad terrifying as he added, "Just don't go and isolate yourself again or I will seriously consider kicking your ass."
Toshinori snorted at that. "You wouldn't kick the ass of a wounded man."
"You want to try it out?"
"No thanks, I believe you," the hero put his hands up in mock-defeat. Sending the confused Izuku a reassuring smile he added, "Although Izuku here could probably defend me in my stead."
Naomasa turned to the blushing boy and chuckled. "Excuse us, Midoriya. Now we are dragging you into this too."
"No excuses needed," Izuku shrugged while still red in the face. "Although I would really defend All Might if you attacked him."
The fact that his last statement had slipped out unchecked was made obvious by the blush turning a deeper shade of red and his flailing arms that followed right behind as he apologized for saying "something rude".
The men only laughed at his slip up. Toshinori's face threatened to split under his wide, proud grin and Naomasa laughed merrily while patting Izuku's shoulder. "I don't doubt that for one second, young man. He is very lucky to have someone like you."
That had Izuku spluttering helplessly and Toshinori stating: "That I truly am."
At that, Izuku turned silent. Wide unbelieving eyes focused on his idol, the boy gaping silently, searching the man's face for humour or the tell-tale of a joke.
He would find nothing of that. Instead, Toshinori held his gaze steadily and still smiling, before he waved the boy over.
Carefully and hesitating the boy padded over to the bed. After some silent convincing, he even dared to sit on the edge of the mattress, right next to the hero.
Naomasa adjusted the chair which had fallen prey to Izuku's dynamic hugging and took a seat. Arms crossed on the back of the chair, he observed how Izuku carefully seated himself, and how All Might contented himself with ruffling the boy's green hair, earning a beaming smile with the gesture.
The policeman hid his own smile behind his arms. Whatever had happened between those two in the last few hours, it had strengthened the bond which they as mentor and student already had before even more.
All three of them turned towards the door as Recovery Girl re-entered the room. She looked them over as if she expected they had injured themselves again in the short time she was gone. After making sure that wasn't the case, she explained, already busying herself with bandages: "I had Lunch Rush prepare something to eat – for all of us. It will take a few minutes longer, but I think we all earned a nice little break and something to fill our bellies with."
"Great. I feel like I could eat a whole horse." Toshinori practically beamed at the notion of food, not caring how scary his smile probably looked. All the people gathered in this room didn't mind his looks anyway, and the thought of eating alone let his stomach growl. He hadn't eaten anything in the last… two, three days? Too long ago, in any case.
"You better be silent, you." The elderly woman stamped over to him, throwing the bandages on his bed and slapping him on the head yet again. "You could have eaten, you just didn't want to!"
"Ouch! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I will better myself."
"After all this years, I really don't believe that anymore, boy."
Naomasa laughed at Toshinori's grumbling. "She got you there."
"Aren't you supposed to help me, mister policeman?"
"Not in this one, old friend. She's totally right."
"Your friend here is a smart one." Recovery Girl praised his traitor of a friend, which Naomasa answered with a wide grin.
Toshinori scowled playfully at them – and at Izuku, too, for the boy was silently snickering beside him. Nudging his cheeky student in the rips, he shuffled over enough so that Recovery Girl could change the bandages, starting at his left arm.
There was content silence, only disturbed when Recovery Girl and Toshinori started a friendly bicker over how the bandages should be wrapped. In the end, Izuku had to take the initiative and wrap the bandages himself around the skinny arm of his mentor, carefully and tentative, but smiling over the praises he became to hear for his work.
Eventually, Naomasa cleared his throat and asked carefully, "I don't want to put pressure on you with the same questions again and again, but… did you find out what you intend to do from now on?"
Toshinori paused at that, freeing his arm out of Izuku's and Recovery Girl's light grip. He looked at it in contemplation, thinking things over. It wasn't so long ago that the exact same question had proved too much for him. He hadn't had an answer then, but…
"You know… Someone told me that there is still a lot that I have to teach. And that there are still students who want to learn from me." Toshinori shot the beaming Izuku a smile and ruffled his hair before continuing, "And after being persuaded like that, I can't really object. So I will be a teacher at U.A, for as long as my students will have me."
"Oho?" Naomasa's smile reappeared and he cocked an eyebrow in good humour. "Sounds like you will stay here for quite the long time."
"Fine by me, really."
Izuku was practically bouncing with happiness and excitement next to him, so Toshinori laid a steadying hand over the boy's fingers. Couldn't have him falling from the bed because of that.
After a moment, he was surprised by the weak pressure of smaller fingers, gripping his own hand lightly. Gazing out of the corner of his eyes, Toshinori could see Izuku looking at their intertwined fingers, before green eyes lifted to gaze up at him inquiringly.
Reassuring, he reciprocated the light pressure and smiled at the brightening face next to him. If the boy needed the physical contact to ensure that his idol wouldn't leave his side again, then Toshinori wouldn't be the one to stop him.
Never mind the fact that he himself felt quite a bit stronger with his student at his side.
"See?" Recovery Girl strapped the last bandages around his side, a smug smile playing on her lips. First he thought she was talking about her handiwork, but then she turned to Naomasa and continued, "I told you the boy would open his eyes."
"I should have listened to you." Naomasa shrugged with a smile. "Never going to bet against you again, I suppose."
Izuku began spluttering again, while Toshinori merely lifted an eyebrow. "Sounds like you two planned this the whole time."
"You can bet on that." Recovery Girl wheeled her chair to her desk, all the while grinning. It was unsettling, to say the least. "Frankly, it was Gran Torino who thought we needed Izuku here to persuade a stubborn idiot like you. The boy is one of the few people you listen to, and thick-headed at that. He was the perfect choice."
"So you used me?" suddenly done spluttering, Izuku's voice didn't give anything away as he focused on the elderly woman.
Recovery Girl actually jolted at that and whirled around. "That's certainly not what I wanted to say! It's…"
"No", Izuku interrupted, still grinning, not angry in the least. "Thank you for letting me help. I'm glad I could do something."
Such an earnest answer was met by silence. Naomasa and Recovery Girl exchanged a quick, surprised look. Toshinori only chuckled and squeezed the boy's hand again. What had they expected? Izuku's only goal was to help others. No surprise there.
Finally, Recovery Girl let her own smile lighten up her surprised face. Shaking her head, she threw her hands in the air and exclaimed, "Really, young man, you have a heart too big to comprehend."
Izuku laughed sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. "Um, I only want to help."
"And that's exactly what I meant by that. Alas!" the woman clapped her hands together, turning serious again. "As happy as I am to see that everything worked out here, let me ask you: What are we going to do from now on? The fight is not really over yet, now is it?"
Her question reminded them that, yes, it really wasn't over yet.
There were people to face and explanations to give. The media would be waiting before the doors of U.A, calling for interviews with All Might. Asking questions about his new – no, his true form. He would have to stand before them and answer every single one of them if he wanted to gain and keep the trust of the society again.
And worse, All for One was most likely still out there, together with the remains of the league of villains. Together with Shigaraki Tomura. And they wouldn't stop their vengeance until they had reached their goal: Killing All Might, shattering the trust in the heroes and thus, fundamentally destroying the society of heroes.
Toshinori pondered about it, feeling the gaze of everyone in the room on him. The problem with media aside, there was no saying when the alliance would attack again, or from where. He himself couldn't fight anymore. And, as much as he hated to admit it while looking at Izuku right next to him, his students were not ready for such a fight yet. All for One was in a completely different league as all the other villains they had faced until now. Most likely no one in U.A. stood a chance against him.
They all would have to get much, much stronger. And who knew how much time they had for that.
But, Toshinori thought while meeting Izuku's gaze (so full of earnest admiration that he almost choked on gratefulness and fondness for the boy): They had already overcome so many obstacles in their way, they wouldn't give up now.
It was almost funny how he had thought of giving up altogether mere hours ago. He had felt broken, and hopeless. Shattered by All for One's words and actions. He hadn't been able to pick up the pieces and shards alone, and had wavered.
But then, Izuku had done what he couldn't, and repaired what had been broken. And all that with a laugh and a smile and tons of determination.
Toshinori almost started outright laughing out of relief and gratefulness.
He didn't feel hopeless anymore, because there was hope right in front of him.
They would be ready when the time to fight came.
As if the boy at his side had heard his thoughts, Izuku inclined his head just enough for a little nod, determination in his eyes. Turning around, the boy declared: "We will give it our all, whatever comes our way!"
"We will", confirmed Toshinori, pride filling him with warmth.
They would, he knew his students good enough to be sure of that. And he would do all he could to help.
"Well, that's a first step then." Naomasa rubbed the back of his head with a little sigh. "Though I hate to think that we can't possibly determine when they will next launch an attack. We from the police will certainly do our best to locate them and stop them before that can happen, but…"
"…But having to wait in this uncertainty is filling everyone here with fear." Recovery Girl finished for him.
"You are right, the both of you." Toshinori admitted without a hint of hesitation. "It is a situation that fills even me with fear."
There were looks exchanged again, as if his friends were worried that he would fall back in his dark thoughts again.
But he merely smiled.
He wouldn't. Never again.
Instead he continued "But we already learned how to master such situations. Izuku, tell me, what do we do about something that induces fear in us?"
He could tell that neither Naomasa nor Recovery Girl could quite catch the meaning of his words.
It didn't matter, really.
Because Izuku caught it and that was all that really mattered in his books.
The boy looked at him, deep in thought as if he wasn't sure he had really understood it right. Then a tiny smile appeared on the freckled face, growing wider and brighter by the second.
Eyes still serious but smile brilliant, Izuku declared earnestly, "We face it with a smile."
Toshinori's smile rivalled Izuku's as he ruffled the boy's hair. "Now that's my boy!"
Somewhere far away, buried deep in his past and his heart, he could almost hear Nana laughing proudly at that.