So, this fic is based on an idea I had while shopping in Wal Mart of all places, over the weekend. I swear ideas strike me super randomly like this all the time. It's kind of a problem, but one I'm sure not many of you will object to. This first chapter is pretty much crack, but I promise it's just setting things up for the next two chapters. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or M/C, but if I did, this is what would happen.

Chapter 1: The Captain's New Clothes

Sharon knew this was a bit silly, but it needed to be done. Her relationship with Andy was steadily moving forward and she was feeling a bit self conscious about certain parts of her wardrobe. More specifically, her sleepwear and undergarments. So, before they took their relationship to the next level, she needed to make a plan for improving these parts of her wardrobe. Which meant shopping. Lots of shopping. So, not wanting to brave the task alone, she'd enlisted Andrea for help with this particular task.

As they entered the mall, Andrea asked, "So, what look are we going for with this? Cause let's face it, there are so many different directions to go."

"I don't know! I haven't dressed for a man in over twenty years, Andrea," Sharon told her.

"Which brings us to your current problem. I see. Well, what kind of stuff does Andy like to see you in? Andrea asked.

"Andrea!" exclaimed Sharon.

"What? It's a valid question," replied Andrea.

"I don't know. We haven't gotten that far yet," said Sharon.

"Even if you had asked him, he probably wouldn't have been much help. The man would think you're the most beautiful woman in the world if you were wearing a paper bag," Andrea pointed out.

Sharon chuckled before she said, "Well, he did tell me once after we started dating that he has a particular appreciation for that black lace dress I wore to the Nutcracker last year."

"Black and lace. Perfect place to start. Also, I've noticed that he has a specific preoccupation with your butt. So, sexy underwear are a must," Andrea told her.

"Should I ask how you know that?" Sharon asked Andrea as her face broke into a huge smile.

"Well, it's kind of obvious. Every time you walk away from that man his eyes follow your butt like a gangster looking for a beef. It's kind of funny, actually," Andrea told her.

"Okay, now that we've established that, we should probably get to actually shopping," Sharon pointed out.

"Okay. Victoria's Secret here we come!" exclaimed Andrea as they walked into the store.

"This is going to be a long day isn't it?" Sharon asked her as they entered the store.

"Come on Sharon! Have some fun with it! How about this one?" Andrea asked as she picked up a nude push up bra with a black lace overlay.

Sharon smiled before she replied, "Yeah. I really like that one."

"And it has black lace for Andy," Andrea pointed out.

"You better not tell him I told you that. The last thing I need is for you to poke fun at him about that in the middle of the murder room and have the whole squad overhear you," said Sharon.

"My lips are sealed. So, how do you feel about color?" Andrea asked her.

"It depends on the color," replied Sharon.

"Such as…" Andrea trailed off questioningly.

"Nothing too bright. I don't want to look like an 80's throwback. I like pastels. Or rich colors like purple or red or dark blue. Oh, and Andy loves me in green. He says it brings out the green in my eyes." Sharon explained.

"Okay, we can work with that. How about this?" Andrea asked as she held up a dark blue lace bra with a white underlay.

"Ooh! I like that one too!" exclaimed Sharon excitedly.

"See, this is fun," Andrea told her.

"It kind of is," admitted Sharon.

They looked at the bras a while longer and Sharon ended up picking out a sage green one with a half lace overlay, a plain purple one and a floral printed one with shades of blues, purples, reds, and hints of pastel peach in the print, band, and straps.

"Okay, now onto the sexy underwear section," said Andrea excitedly.

"You are entirely too excited about this," Sharon told Andrea.

"Well, when you work in the lines of work we do, it's one of the only girly vices we have," Andrea pointed out.

"That is absolutely true," replied Sharon.

"So, are we going for more lace with this?" Andrea asked Sharon.

"Definitely," replied Sharon as they began to peruse the assortment of lace underwear options.

In the end, Sharon ended up picking out a pair of lace underwear to match each bra she had chosen. They were just about to head to the register when Andrea pulled her by the arm.

"Andrea, where are we going? I thought we were done shopping here," said Sharon.

"You did say you needed some new sleepwear," replied Andrea as she dragged Sharon towards the lingerie section.

"I meant sleepwear I could actually wear outside the bedroom," Sharon pointed out.

"Well, it never hurts to have options," said Andrea.

"The only reason I'm going along with this idea is because I agree that it's good to have options," Sharon told her.

"Good enough for me. How about this one?" asked Andrea as held up an ivory satin slip with black lace trim on the top and bottom of it.

"I really like it. It doesn't look like I'm trying too hard. I'm afraid of looking ridiculous in stuff like this. Like I'm trying too hard," admitted Sharon.

"Sharon, it's no secret that Andy literally worships the ground you walk on. I doubt you could ever look ridiculous to him," Andrea told her.

"He is pretty great," said Sharon as a huge goofy smile appeared on her face.

"See. Now, what else?" Andrea asked her as they continued surveying the options in the lingerie section.

"How about this?" Sharon asked Andrea as she held up a black satin slip with a black lace top and black lace detail at the bottom.

"Yes! Get it!" exclaimed Andrea.

"Okay, but that's it. I'm paying for this stuff and then we need to go find some actual sleepwear that I can walk from my bedroom to my kitchen in," said Sharon.

"Okay. Just tell me what I'm working with here. What do you wear to bed now?" Andrea asked her as they were checking out.

Usually a t-shirt and black leggings or yoga pants. Is that bad?" Sharon asked her.

"No, not really. You could always pump it up a little with some cute sleep shorts though. They have some really cute ones over at Gap," suggested Andrea as Sharon paid for her items.

"Well, I guess we know where we're going next then," said Sharon as her and Andrea headed out of the store and towards Gap.

A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed this first of three chapters! As always, please leave a review to let me know what you thought of it. I'll warn all of you, the next chapter will be pure Shandy fluff. So, you guys have that to look forward to. I'll try my best to have the second chapter posted within the next day or two. Thanks for reading and reviewing!