Prologue: I've Done This Before
I've done this before…
Raye felt uneasy. She glances at his outstretched hand before turning away. Jed Kincaid was nothing but trouble.
The first time she enters into a relationship with him, she worries herself sick over his antics. She is seventeen and he is twenty, prone to drunken nights with his buddies and a penchant for breaking speed limits in his brand new Lotus Elise. She breaks it off after three months of dating and returns his class ring along with the numerous presents he bought to make up for his recklessness.
Two years later they meet again, this time at University. He has a leggy redhead at his side while she is hardly recognizable with her short hair. When he finally does, he gives her a lazy grin and sends his redhead on her way. He invites her for coffee but she declines politely. He asks for her phone number instead. She hesitates. He insists. She caves.
He doesn't call and she begins to wonder why. After a week he finally does. He asks her out for dinner but she declines once again. He laughs and tells her he'll try again next week. She wants to tell him to stop trying but the words get caught in her throat. They hang up and she returns to her reading while he calls up a friend.
He calls again the following week. She answers, already anticipating his call. She is ready to turn him down again but he beats her to the punch. Away? He calls to tell her that he'll be away for several weeks. Oh? 'Where to?' she wants to ask but curbs her curiosity and…what was that? Disappointment. He smirks. He says his goodbyes and is about to hang up when she asks him if he wants to come over for dinner when he returns. He laughs while she fumes. He tells her he would love to and they make arrangements.
He arrives at her apartment at the agreed upon date, bearing her favorite flowers. She accepts the lilies graciously and invites him in. He compliments her on her loveliness. She tries to hide a smile, fails, calls him a flatterer, but thanks him nonetheless. They banter easily until he mentions their previous break-up. He means to touch on it lightly but it makes her uneasy. She changes the topic quickly and he obliges by commenting on her short locks. A change, she says as she runs her fingers through the hair that used to fall down her back but now just barely grazes her shoulders. He smiles and reaches across the table to tuck a stray strand behind her ear.
The next time he sees her, her hair is held back by a red headband. He picks her up from class that day. She hops inside his beloved Lotus without so much as a glance at the people who gather to admire it, and remembers a time when she almost keyed the dark blue paint out of frustration one late night. She tells him he is a show off, her body sinking further into the leather seat while his arm is stretched across her front, reaching for the belt to buckle her in. He laughs as he finally pulls away from the curb, reveling at the feel of her hand resting lightly on his knee.
Months later, she cries after their first official fight. They aren't even a couple. After an hour he storms off. Coward, he hisses as he passes by, when she tells him no once again. She throws a lamp at him before the door closes completely. It misses him by a few inches. He returns hours later, body drenched from the storm raging outside. He doesn't say anything but she invites him in anyway. She doesn't need him to apologize; she already knows he's sorry. She is too.
It's around Christmas when she finally acknowledges that they are indeed a couple. There is no announcement, no special day, and no memory to mark the occasion. She simply signs their names together on every card she sends and every present she gives.
They break up five months later when he graduates. He accepts a job offer in Italy. He proposes to her but she declines. She's not ready to be a bride. He knows their time in University is luck being on their side; stolen moments that never should have been. He kisses her on the forehead and walks away with no address or promise to return.
He attends her graduation two years later. He pushes himself from the tree that he is leaning on and walks towards her. He stops when someone else blocks his path; sees her enveloped in the man's embrace. He leaves the lilies on a bench as he walks away. She notices them when she walks by minutes later, carrying roses in her arms.
…and I will do it again.