"Come on, open the door!"
A large Russian man in a red shirt gallops to his front door, swinging it open to see a skinny Boston youth in blue. He smiles.
"I got this great new game! Sid Meier's Civilization! Wanna play toge-"
"NO!"
He grabs the man by the balls, and throws him at the sun. The game falls from his hands.
"YOU FAT BALD BASTAAAAARRD...!"
He picks up the game, reading the text on the box.
LOLZ, YU PLEY ASS A PRSN OV HISTRY, AN U GET 2 LEED PEEPALZ TOO FIKTEREE! DIS IZ AH FOON GAYM!And his eyes widen as he reads the bottom.
"...it costs $400,000 to play this game... for twelve seconds..."
AFFJDAJNCUOUJAETJJ-Placing the cartridge disk tape into his ChinandoStation 360, he presses the on lever and sits back. He places a camera on the CRT set, and makes it activate fastly.
"...I am heavy weapons guy, Mikhail, and IF you are watching dis, you are good man! Dis game is SIV I L I SAY TION! I play game!"
The game boots up the ass into a screen that is a menu screen called a menu screen. It has the things that menu screens have on most other menu screens, except this menu screen has the planet Earth on the screen, so it gave the author enough use of the word screen to create the first true paragraph on your own screen.
Other than the strikingly fabulous menu screen, there are options, such as options, new game, and customize.
"We have many things to choose, and I cannot wait to play!"
He taps on the G button.
CHINTENDOSTATION 360 HAS CRASHED.ERROR 69. LOL.
SBGSSEGHJTTTHVCVNKGS-
"Alright, I made new save."
His game runs smoothly until the year 1956, when an ambassador for Ghandi made him see him.
"Tremble before our glorious leader!"And his words were inspiring.
"LOL, NOOB, IMMA NUKE U"Fifteen nuke units were sent in the direction of Heavy's cities.
"OH NOOOOO! OH, THIS IS BAD!"
BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM
Your civilization has been wiped out."WEHHHH!!!"
And then he threw his living room at the sun.
Meanwhile, in space"Well, at least it's quiet up here... what's that?" says the man in blue.
It was a full living room.
"AAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAAA!"
And he was destroyed.
"You are dead! Not big surprise."
THE FUCKING END
My first Team Fortress fanfiction. I know it's absolute bollocks, but it's my normal fiction style. It was meant to be bad. I could make a good one, but... meh.
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And many, many more craptastic stories!