Title: Recycle, Reuse, Renew
Author:Red Wasabi
Disclaimer: It's not mine, but I wish it were.
Notes: To all who read my fics: This one is much happier than the other one I've posted as of ate! Wheeljack/Bluestreak My first Wheeljack fic ever! I have been hankerin' to do on with him for quite sometime too. I'd just never found a suitable plot until now. And many thnkas to libra4eva, who beta-ed me tonight, and gave me confidence to post this!
Rated: PG
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Wheeljack moved his large frame carefully to the side of his berth, as to not disturb the unusually peaceful re-charge of his berth-mate, Bluestreak. Wheeljack could barley make out his lover's face plates in the darkness that entombed the room. If he just modified his optics a little he could almost believe that it was--.
Wheeljack frowned deeply in the dark, he couldn't think like that. What they had together was enough for him—it had to be because what he really wanted was unattainable. His digits tenderly reached out to stroke the red chevron that adorned Bluestreak's head.
He was using him, using him as a replacement for the affection he would never get from Ratchet. He had long since given up the dream of ever sharing a berth like this with that white and red 'bot; but in his desperation he had found another just as empty as he was.
Bluestreak turned restlessly in his sleep, pushing himself deeper into Wheeljack's warm embrace. Wheeljack's arm tightened around the fitful mech, and a small smile flitted sadly across his face plates. Bluestreak was mumbling a name that wasn't his again. They were both using each other.
Wheeljack supposed that he should be jealous, after all Bluestreak was his lover, in his berth, in his workshop. He should be mumbling his name unconsciously while he re-charged; but Wheeljack wasn't jealous. They had both began this relationship with the understanding that they each wanted some other bot, but couldn't have them for one reason or another.
They had each been left alone—so wanting—so needing; Wheeljack because his ideal spark-mate had rejected his advances and chosen someone else, and Bluestreak because—Hound had died and left him all alone. Wheeljack absently caressed Bluestreak's back seams as he stared blankly out into the murky darkness of his workshop.
The first time they were together had been one of the most moving experiences for him. Not because he'd found out he had some 'great' and hither unknown 'love' for Bluestreak, but because it had been the first time he had seen gray mech for more than just the talkative bot he was. He'd seen something deeper inside Bluestreak; something that had mirrored the same pain and loss he'd carried within his spark for vorns.
He'd found a connection, and as they had frantically made love to each other on that first night, each of them calling out a different mechs name, he'd found understanding—acceptance. It had been the first of many unspoken agreements between the two mechs when they first started interfacing with each other that neither would ever mention that odd quirk of theirs.
A small whimper trembled forth from Bluestreak's vocalizer, Wheeljack quickly silenced it by placing his heated lips firmly on Bluestreak's. Wheeljack's optics shut off in bliss as Bluestreak's air compressor sighed contentedly sending a tantalizing puff of heated air across his lips.
A low moan issued forth from Wheeljack's vocalizer as he curled over and nuzzled his face plates against the delicate fuel lines in Bluestreak's neck. He didn't love him, what they did with one another, it wasn't about love—it was about loneliness, and comfort. He did appreciate him though, he appreciated the way he never looked at him with pity—like so many of the other mechs before him had. He appreciated the way he never corrected him when he called him by another name, the way he seemed to cling to him when they re-charged in their berth at night. Making him feel safe, secure—and wanted.
Oh Primus how he loved being wanted. Wanted—it was like nothing else Wheeljack had ever felt. He had always been the one left wanting, but never had he been wanted—no—needed. For the first time in his life someone needed him. They needed him to chase away nightmares, to feel happy if only for a brief moment, to forget for a while.
Bluestreak had needed him, and Wheeljack wasn't ashamed to admit that he had grown to need the gray mech just as much. If not more sometimes. The days when he was forced to work along side of Ratchet in the med-bay, the days when he was forced to act as if he felt nothing for the passionate med-bot. When he had to pretend that the happy banter between him and his lover—Sunstreaker, didn't bother him at all. Those were the days when he came back to his barracks filled with bitterness, and hate.
Bluestreak was his only saving grace on those days. Somehow the Datsun was able to make him forget about it all. All the anger and hostility he felt would melt away when he was on top of Bluestreak. Somewhere in between the anguished sobs that would wrack his frame, and his keen wails where he would cry the name Ratchet out a hundred times, he would find peace again.
"Hound!?" Wheeljack's head jerked back startled at the sound of Bluestreak's sleep-filled, panicked voice.
Wheeljack's embraced the confused mech tighter, his legs moving to intertwine themselves with Bluestreak's twitching ones.
"Shhh, it's ok Blue. I'm here." Wheeljack whispered gently in Bluestreak's audio receptors.
Bluestreak's frame trembled violently underneath Wheeljack, as he blindly groped the darkness for as much of Wheeljack as he could clutch at. "'Jack? You'll never leave me right? You'll never leave me like Hou--" Bluestreak's vocalizer choked on the name.
Wheeljack's grasp around Bluestreak's quivering frame clenched uncontrollably. Bluestreak needed him, and needed something that only Wheeljack could give him—forgiveness. In turn Bluestreak had something that no other mech had ever been able to give to Wheeljack—solace. It was an even trade.
"No Blue, I'll never leave you. Not in a thousand vorns."
AN: So yeah, Did you catch that whole Ratchet/Sunstreaker thing...cause...that was just something really random that I thought of and now...I'm going to totally have to write something with them as a paring. That something might even have to me multi-chaptered...