Hey everyone! Yeah, I know my other fic isn't finished yet (after just
what, … 4 months? sorry, writer's block…), but I just had to do this. Don't
worry about the title, this fic is in English, but it's just that I've been
inspired by an old French song. So it's based on it… or rather on its
translation. I don't have a clue why I love old depressing songs that much.
Anyway, here's the story. I'm going to ask for reviews this time because
I'm not sure if I should stop it there or continue it…
The song, "Le téléphone pleure", was sang (and written) by Claude François and I certainly don't own it. I'm sorry, but I changed some words and sentences for it to fit the Charmed universe. However, the original song and the exact translation (well as close as I could come) are in the Real song chapter. I don't own the song, or Charles Francois, or the little girl who sings with him, or any "Charmed" character that may appear in this fic.
The song is about a man (in this case Cole) who has been gone from home for 4 years (6 in the original song before the kid was born, but not in my fic) and calls home and a little girl answers the phone… well you'll see… When the girl is talking it is written (M) and when it's Cole it's (C) when he's talking and (CT) to what he's thinking… I hope it won't be too confusing, cause, well… it IS poetry, and traduced, so I did what I could… I don't know if the song exists in English, if it does tell me so I can rearrange this fic and curse myself for the useless translation I will have make.
1.1.1 -------------------------------------------------------
(On the phone)
-----------------------
(M) Hello!
(CT) "Oh my god… It's her… But she sounds so old already, it's impossible! How could I miss it… all that time I could have spent with her…"?
(C) Listen, your mom is near you
You must tell her: "Mommy, there's somebody for you "
(M) Oh! It's you sir from last time?
Okay, I'm gonna get her
But I think she's in the bath
And I don't think she'll be able to come
(C) Tell her, I beg you, tell her it's important
And he's waiting
(CT) "Please let her come… Please god, I can't go back to what I was…"
(M) Tell me, have you done something to my mom?
She always makes me big signs
And she always whispers to me: "Tell him that I'm not there"
(CT) Cole sighted. He had been hoping for too much… After all, why would she want to speak to him again?
(C) Tell me, how is your house?
And do you learn every night all your lessons?
(M) Oh, Yes! But because my mom works
It's my aunt who brings me at school
And there's only one note in my book
The others have one from their daddy, not me…
1.1.1.1 (CT) "I'm sorry child… so sorry… I know I should be there… I just wish your mother would forgive me… It isn't my fault, I was tricked… But I guess I still should have seen it coming… and I guess I should have told her before…"
(C) Oooooh tell her how I ache
Ache since four years ago
And it's your age my child
(M) Oh, no! I'm five years old
Eh! Tell me, did you know my mom before?
Tough she's never told me about you
You stay there, right!
1.1.1.1.1 (CT) "Phoebe, please…" was all he could whisper when the young girl let the phone down for a second… He wish he could yell out to her, let her know how stupid he felt…Stupid to have been fooled by the Seer, stupid for waiting 3 years to tell her that he was the new source… but nothing could get out of his mouth except for these few words: "Phoebe, I'm sorry."
(C) The telephone cries when she doesn't comes
When I yell to her: "I love you"
The words die in the receptor
The telephone cries, please don't hang up
I feel so near you with the voice.
(CT) " I wonder if Phoebe told her sisters about… what I am now. Doubt it, since I'm still alive. Oh I miss them all so much…"
(C) Will you help at your next vacations your aunt at her club?
Do you like P3?
(M) Oh yeah, I love to play in her office
And Melinda always brings nice toys
But tell me, how do you know my aunt and P3?
Do you know Leo and my other aunt too?
1.1.1.1.1.1 (CT) Melinda… he let out a short chuckle, he remembered Leo and Piper's little brat, she was always finding a way to get on his back so they would play horsies around the house till his back was sore. She was 3 and a half when he last saw her…And Marianne (his daughter) was only one. Well at least the cousins seemed to be getting along well… Wonder if she would recognise him… Probably not, I doubt Phoebe let pictures of me lying around the house… Wonder if she was trying to forget about him… Probably… "How could I ask her to bare with what's inside me when in fact even I can't?"
(C) Ooooooh! Tell her all my pain,
How much I love the both of you
(M) You love us? But, I've never even saw you!
What's wrong?
Why did your voice change?
But, you're crying, why?
(CT) Why? I've lost it all! I had a loving family, a best friend, a daughter; I even had a good honest job! Ok, I needed a little help from magic to keep the source in check, but that was all… Is that what happiness is for? Make us fall harder when it is taken away from us? And why did Phoebe react this way when she learned it? I think we both freaked out… I know she still loved me… I could see it in her eyes when she told me farewell, and I certainly still love her… I wish I had never came in her life, never caused her so much pain… But now how can I walk away?
(C) The telephone cries when she doesn't comes
When I yell to her: "I love you"
2 The words die in the receptor
The telephone cries, please don't hang up
I feel so near you with the voice.
(C) Please, listen to me
The telephone cries for the last time
Cause I'll be tomorrow back in
(C) Please hold her back!
(M) But she's going!
(C) Come on, insist!
(M) She's gone.
(C) If she is gone, then well too bad.
(M) Goodbye mister.
(C) Goodbye little one.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok, so there you go. If it was confusing would you be sweet and give me tips to make it less confusing? Tell me if you want me to continue? (don't worry, the rest of the fic would not be with written from songs.) Tell me, because I don't really like stories with bad endings and this seems like one. I could finish it and put a good ending if you'd like… anyway, tell me.
The song, "Le téléphone pleure", was sang (and written) by Claude François and I certainly don't own it. I'm sorry, but I changed some words and sentences for it to fit the Charmed universe. However, the original song and the exact translation (well as close as I could come) are in the Real song chapter. I don't own the song, or Charles Francois, or the little girl who sings with him, or any "Charmed" character that may appear in this fic.
The song is about a man (in this case Cole) who has been gone from home for 4 years (6 in the original song before the kid was born, but not in my fic) and calls home and a little girl answers the phone… well you'll see… When the girl is talking it is written (M) and when it's Cole it's (C) when he's talking and (CT) to what he's thinking… I hope it won't be too confusing, cause, well… it IS poetry, and traduced, so I did what I could… I don't know if the song exists in English, if it does tell me so I can rearrange this fic and curse myself for the useless translation I will have make.
1.1.1 -------------------------------------------------------
(On the phone)
-----------------------
(M) Hello!
(CT) "Oh my god… It's her… But she sounds so old already, it's impossible! How could I miss it… all that time I could have spent with her…"?
(C) Listen, your mom is near you
You must tell her: "Mommy, there's somebody for you "
(M) Oh! It's you sir from last time?
Okay, I'm gonna get her
But I think she's in the bath
And I don't think she'll be able to come
(C) Tell her, I beg you, tell her it's important
And he's waiting
(CT) "Please let her come… Please god, I can't go back to what I was…"
(M) Tell me, have you done something to my mom?
She always makes me big signs
And she always whispers to me: "Tell him that I'm not there"
(CT) Cole sighted. He had been hoping for too much… After all, why would she want to speak to him again?
(C) Tell me, how is your house?
And do you learn every night all your lessons?
(M) Oh, Yes! But because my mom works
It's my aunt who brings me at school
And there's only one note in my book
The others have one from their daddy, not me…
1.1.1.1 (CT) "I'm sorry child… so sorry… I know I should be there… I just wish your mother would forgive me… It isn't my fault, I was tricked… But I guess I still should have seen it coming… and I guess I should have told her before…"
(C) Oooooh tell her how I ache
Ache since four years ago
And it's your age my child
(M) Oh, no! I'm five years old
Eh! Tell me, did you know my mom before?
Tough she's never told me about you
You stay there, right!
1.1.1.1.1 (CT) "Phoebe, please…" was all he could whisper when the young girl let the phone down for a second… He wish he could yell out to her, let her know how stupid he felt…Stupid to have been fooled by the Seer, stupid for waiting 3 years to tell her that he was the new source… but nothing could get out of his mouth except for these few words: "Phoebe, I'm sorry."
(C) The telephone cries when she doesn't comes
When I yell to her: "I love you"
The words die in the receptor
The telephone cries, please don't hang up
I feel so near you with the voice.
(CT) " I wonder if Phoebe told her sisters about… what I am now. Doubt it, since I'm still alive. Oh I miss them all so much…"
(C) Will you help at your next vacations your aunt at her club?
Do you like P3?
(M) Oh yeah, I love to play in her office
And Melinda always brings nice toys
But tell me, how do you know my aunt and P3?
Do you know Leo and my other aunt too?
1.1.1.1.1.1 (CT) Melinda… he let out a short chuckle, he remembered Leo and Piper's little brat, she was always finding a way to get on his back so they would play horsies around the house till his back was sore. She was 3 and a half when he last saw her…And Marianne (his daughter) was only one. Well at least the cousins seemed to be getting along well… Wonder if she would recognise him… Probably not, I doubt Phoebe let pictures of me lying around the house… Wonder if she was trying to forget about him… Probably… "How could I ask her to bare with what's inside me when in fact even I can't?"
(C) Ooooooh! Tell her all my pain,
How much I love the both of you
(M) You love us? But, I've never even saw you!
What's wrong?
Why did your voice change?
But, you're crying, why?
(CT) Why? I've lost it all! I had a loving family, a best friend, a daughter; I even had a good honest job! Ok, I needed a little help from magic to keep the source in check, but that was all… Is that what happiness is for? Make us fall harder when it is taken away from us? And why did Phoebe react this way when she learned it? I think we both freaked out… I know she still loved me… I could see it in her eyes when she told me farewell, and I certainly still love her… I wish I had never came in her life, never caused her so much pain… But now how can I walk away?
(C) The telephone cries when she doesn't comes
When I yell to her: "I love you"
2 The words die in the receptor
The telephone cries, please don't hang up
I feel so near you with the voice.
(C) Please, listen to me
The telephone cries for the last time
Cause I'll be tomorrow back in
(C) Please hold her back!
(M) But she's going!
(C) Come on, insist!
(M) She's gone.
(C) If she is gone, then well too bad.
(M) Goodbye mister.
(C) Goodbye little one.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok, so there you go. If it was confusing would you be sweet and give me tips to make it less confusing? Tell me if you want me to continue? (don't worry, the rest of the fic would not be with written from songs.) Tell me, because I don't really like stories with bad endings and this seems like one. I could finish it and put a good ending if you'd like… anyway, tell me.