Not Really There

Disclaimer: No Pokemon or Naruto Characters Recognized is Mine.

Naruto had just come back from a very successful prank when it happened.

-v-

The ever-present disgust was still there even after two years of living in the same run-down apartment complex. The place was his - the owner practically gave it to him - and was covered in all sorts of graffiti, trash and bodily fluids and no matter how many times he cleaned it, some pissed off villagers would redo the damage thrice-fold.

So he stopped trying.

With that, he noticed the villagers stopped desecrating his building,, bored with an easy target that apparently didn't even care about its own home. In their own twisted logic, the villagers figured it just made Naruto more of a demon, not caring about his home.

From there, a mask was created.

He ran around the village, pranks galore, stupid smile, obliviousness, and suddenly - they left him alone. Sure there were the few stragglers who felt they had to prove something, but that was easily taken care of with a henge that showed false injuries.

When he went to the Hokage about it, the old man had only said he had taken care of it. And indeed, Naruto had twice as many ANBU guards... who did nothing when he was hurt, when he was chased or beaten.

He stopped talking to the old man. He filled their conversations with mundane talks of pranks and food and ramen, neatly side-stepping intrusive questions about his personal life.

He had no friends, but that was okay. Friends only betrayed you in the end.

He had no family because according to the Matron in the orphanage, "Demons like you only have demons as parents. Thank God they're dead."

Which is why he was so damned amazed when he stepped into his house - and that was using the word loosely - only to find his once disaster zone of a living room was cleaned and organized. The floor was spotless and gleamed under the fluorescent lights. Ripped books were repaired and placed nicely back into the shelf and there were groceries on his counter-top. Fresh, delicious groceries.

It also surprised him when a purple cat - of all things - strutted up to him like it was proud of something.

So it was no shocker of a reason when he screamed - shouted in manly surprise - at the feeling of silky fur against his bare legs. He was only wearing boxers, his pants being ripped off in the high-speed chase throughout the village.

"W-what are you!?"

The animal gave him a deadpan stare that seemed to ask, "Are you stupid?" And merely sat down and licked its paws with a delicate swipe of its tongue. Seeing the animal - purple, double tailed, white-eyed (like those creepy Hyugas) and with a large gem placed in its head - Naruto wouldn't have been surprised to see the cat have two tongues as well.

Wait. Blue eyes squinted, was it a cat? It sure looked like one. Big, triangle-shaped ears. Cat body. Cat tail...s. Cat tails. Plural. As in two tails. Two tails... "Gah!" Scrambling back, the genius in disguise immediately stood up and pointed a finger at the serene creature. "You're a Bakeneko, aren't you?"

Again, Naruto was treated to an exasperated look of disdain.

This is my Master? Cute.

The voice was most decidedly male, but that wasn't what Naruto focused on. To him, it wasn't at all weird that the purple demon cat could speak, no it wasn't in a world of Summons and Chakra, but what the cat said was what got the blond worked up.

"Who are you calling cute?!"

Be a dear and stop shouting. The animals nearby will go deaf.

"Don't call me that either! And I'm not yelling!"

The creature lifted a nonexistent eyebrow, Whatever. Has anything sunk in yet? You must be smarter than these ignoramuses here in the village. Honestly, Vaporeon has better sense than these shallow bastards. And she frets over a single split fur.

The last part went in one ear and out the other. All Naruto comprehended was that, "You complimented me!" then,"You called me Master! What are you? How did you get here? How did you clean my apartment? And what are you!?"

I am Espeon, a Psychic Pokemon. A Pokemon is a creature with extraordinary powers. Much like you humans. I was placed here because Arceus bid it so. I have watched the sham you call 'living' and decided - Here the cat glared at him, white eyes narrowing so Naruto knew he was serious. To help. I call you Master because that is what you are.

Naruto wasn't stupid, no matter what the village seemed to thing, so he knew there was more to the story than what this Espeon was saying. But at the same time, he didn't hear any falsehoods, and the blond was very good at spotting lies. The furry-fox in his tummy helped as well, the Kitsune hated lies as much as its host.

"You didn't say how you got my apartment like this."

In answer the red-gem started to glow and Naruto found himself floating. While not a traditional ability or move, most Psychic Pokemon would call this... childish.

"I don't care! This is awesome." At the moment, the blond was swimming in midair, a giggling laugh falling from his lips - so much unlike his usual fake-boisterous one - and it made the Espeon smile in response.

"Hey, is Espeon your name?"

No, it is the name of my species. If we weren't conversing telepathically, then all you would hear would be my name. For reference, the Pokemon dropped the mind-link and spoke, "Espi, Espeon."

"Wow! That's so cool! So what should I call you then? If I called you Espeon, that'd be like calling myself human." Though I doubt it sometimes.

"Ow!" A slim paw, belying power, slapped him. Hard. "What was that for?!"

Just because you can't hear me, doesn't me I can't hear you. You are as human as the rest of these ignorant fools. Though infinitely more smarter. The Espeon jumped onto the couch, graceful and beautiful all in one motion. You have the... Kyubi, was it? At Naruto's nod, he continued. You have that sealed in you, but before that, the fox had killed and killed. The people in this village have no fond memories of the fox. As such, you are its container, which gives them a right to take it out on you.

Naruto knew this, he knew it, but it didn't make the hurt any easier. Slowly, he floated down to the couch, a sad look in blue eyes. "But I'm not Kyubi, he's in me and we talk sometimes, but he's him and I'm me."

Which is why I say you are smarter than the idiots in this village.

... "So are you staying with me then? Won't someone try and take you away? I mean, you're not the most inconspicuous of animals. And what do I call you anyways, I can't keep calling you by your species." When an approving look was aimed in his direction, Naruto felt something warm form in his stomach.

I am a Psychic Pokemon, a simple illusion to hide my gem and tail would be easy. My color you can say is natural. I have seen that pink-haired child and the man with the silver. Purple is rather tame. As for my name... you will choose that.

Naruto's eyes widened. "Wow, you can do that? Can... can you teach me?" Hesitant because he wasn't used to asking for anything.

... Perhaps. Your Chakra is much different than my energy. We will try it out later, as for my name... you may choose it. A nickname of sorts. As for my name... you will choose that.

Naruto knew the significance of this and felt a bit off-balance. "Kougyoku." A blush was barely visible under his whiskers but Espeon - or the newly named Kougyoku - spotted it and merely nodded in all the grace of a feline.

You're not very imaginative, are you? Kougyoku, 'ruby'?

"Oh shush."

It's cute though. I told you from the beginning, cute.

"You're annoying, you know that, right?"

Aw. Poor Master.

"You suck."

But it's a loving relationship.

And that's the end of my one-shot that I'm not going to continue. Anyone wanna adopt it, go ahead. Tell me though, and give credit where credit is due.

Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do next? Up for anything.

And for those of you who are waiting for Lady Slippers, the next chapter is coming up. It's long overdue.