When I first arrived at the Salvatore house I was still grieving. My parents death was very sudden and had shaken me dramatically. Though I was suffering the Salvatore boys, Stefan and Damon, helped me to become more like my old self again. Stefan was the one who first became my friend, so naturally, at first, I was closest to him. It's 1860 so I'm fifteen, a year older than Stefan. Mr Salvatore is kind enough to let me stay in their home as my brother, who is my only known living relative left, told me he couldn't care less about what happened to me.
I sighed and put my journal down. I had decided to read through my journal entries from the very start. It was mother who was always pestering me to start one from when I was young but I thought it was a stupid idea. After she died I felt like I owed it to her, hoping that she could somehow see what I've been writing. I heard a small tap on my door.
"Yes?" I stood and turned to the doorway just as the door swung open. Damon walked in and offered me his arm.
"Could I trouble you to accompany me to the gardens?" I smiled and raised my eye brows. I looped my hand under his arm and held near his elbow, letting him lead me out the door and down the stair case.
"When did you become such a gentleman?" He turned to me and flashed one of his famous smirks. My knees grew slightly weak for several moments though he had used that smirk on me for the last two years. It got me thinking as we headed out the door and towards the hedge maze. I had changed lots since I got here when I was fifteen. I was seventeen now and not only did my looks change but so did my thoughts. I was beginning to notice things about Damon that I've never noticed before. Like, how he looked in the morning with perfectly unruffled clothes or when he played ball with Stefan or how sometimes when I joined in their game how he tackled me (not as rough as his brother) and kept me pressed to his body for a few second more than normal.
"What thoughts are you lost in now, Sylvia?" Damon's smooth, deep voice broke through my thoughts and made me blush. That was another thing I was noticing, his deep, masculine voice….
"Who told you I was lost in them? Maybe I was making sense of them." He kept walking, leading me further into the maze that he, Stefan and I spent many of our days in.
"Tell me about your thoughts, they must be some thoughts to keep you quiet for so long." Gasping, I used my free hand to playfully swat his arm and he raised his arms up in defence, the hand on his arm slipping back to my side. I suddenly felt myself missing the touch of his skin but brushed it away as soon as it surfaced. Flashing me yet another smirk he offered me his arm again to which I gladly took and we managed to walk even more before either of us talked, we were simply enjoying each other's company.
"So, are you going to speak to me or must I fill the silence?" I pondered for a moment thinking but I already knew what my answer would be.
"Enlighten me, Mr Salvatore." We finally made it to s small bench seat and I sat down in the most ladylike manner I could summon which turned out to be very ladylike considering that I had spent so much time around men.
"Well, I was thinking about how beautiful you are." My eyes widened and I sucked in a sharp breath. Damon then sat next to me and my body twisted to face him as he moved.
"Damon, I –" His finger came up to my lips, gently brushing against them, silencing me mid-sentence. Slowly he dragged them from my mouth, across my cheek and to the nape of my neck.
It felt like I was in a trance.
I watched as he swallowed his nerves, as his gaze flicked from my eyes to my lips and back to my eyes. Then he started to move his own face closer to mine. It was then that my mind finally registered what was happening. I had no idea of what to do or say or anything! He had caught me totally off guard, I had never even kissed anybody before and I didn't even know how to do it. Not like anyone has ever tried to kiss me before now… My eyes fluttered shut as his nose brushed against mine and I was instantly overwhelmed. Just before his lips touched mine I placed my hand on his chest signalling him to stop. I could feel his eyes piercing into me but I didn't dare open mine.
"Sylvia, what's wrong?" His voice sounded wounded like it would if I had slapped him clean across the face. I opened my eyes and found myself swimming in the cool blue ocean that Damon's eyes consisted of.
"You caught me off guard is all. It's not like I don't like you Damon, I just –" He tried to contain his excitement and surprise.
"You like me?" Now it was my turn to blush and I looked down to my hands in force of habit. Biting my lip I looked up at him and nodded.
"I do but, Damon, I don't know. I've never felt like this about anybody. Ever." His face dropped slightly but he still had hope glittering through his eyes.
"And you need time to think, right?" Damon finished my small speech for me.
"So you understand? Please say you do, Damon. I don't want to lose you I just need a little time." He just sighed and grabbed my hand in his. A shiver ran through my body when he did this and his fingers… It felt like they were a flame on my skin, the fire trailing through my heart and right to the tip of my toes.
"Of course, Sylvia. Just do me a favour. Let me know where you stand by tonight. You know where I do." At that last comment I knew the only way I could have an answer so quick was to talk to Stefan. He knew us both so well.
"Alright, Mr Salvatore. I'll meet with you later tonight." I went to stand but had an afterthought and stopped myself just in time. Bending close to Damon's face I pressed my lips to his cheek. My eyes squeezed shut as I savoured the moment and with that I stood, hitched up my dress and ran back to the house.
Back at the house I found Stefan in the library where I knew he would be. I burst in and he put down the book he was read and came over to me.
"Sylvia, what happened?" I was tongue-tied for a moment before I finally spilled everything to him.
"DamonalmostkissedmebutthenIstoppedhimandIdontknowwhyandnowhewantsananswerbytonightandIdontknowwhattodo." Stefan grabbed my shoulders and sat me down on a soft lounge before sitting next to me. The soft lounge reminded me of me kissing Damon's cheek and it reminded me of my almost first kiss.
"Tell me but slow down. A lot." I took a deep breath and repeated, "Damon almost kissed me but then I stopped him and I don't know why and now he wants an answer by tonight and I don't know what to do." I said it all slow enough for Stefan to understand and without taking a single breath.
"Why did you stop him, I thought you liked him?" I stared at Stefan.
"How did you know?" He frowned at me and searched my eyes.
"He cannot keep his gaze off of you and I see that you can't help but do the same to him, Sylvia." That got me really thinking. Was I really being that forward?
"I don't know what to do, Stefan. I'm just scared." Tears welled up in my eyes and as hard as I tried to hide them the boy across from me saw them.
"Is it loving or being loved that scares you?" The tears spilt down my face. I couldn't even answer. My throat tightened when I tried to speak but Stefan must have known because he just hugged me. How could someone younger than me, even if only by a year, be so, so much wiser? Well, as best he could with my dress between us. Once I had calmed down a bit I pulled away from Stefan.
"I want to read for a little, Stefan. Just let my mind drift." All he did was nod before selecting a book and passing it to me.
"Here. This may help your mind and it may help you." I had no idea what he meant until I curled up of the lounge and started reading. It was a romantic novel about these two friends who were both looking for love but, even thought the reader could clearly see it, they couldn't see that they were perfect for each other. I was almost finished the book when Stefan finally shook me back to reality. I hadn't moved from my spot for hours and I hadn't even noticed.
"It's time, Sylvia. You need to tell him." Stefan was just about to leave the library when I stopped him with a simple question.
"How do they get together in the end?" I half whispered, holding up the book. Stefan smiled and didn't even turn to face me when he replied.
"They are truthful to each other." And with that he was gone.
I was standing outside Damon's room like I had been for a few minutes now. I was trying to think of what I should say and what I should do and all that stuff that the author of that romantic novel said girls overanalyse. It suddenly occurred to me that I didn't even know the title of the book. Maybe I should go back and see if it's still where I left it before someone puts it away.
No. I was trying to talk myself out of talking to Damon. Taking a breath in I turned the knob of the door and pushed it open enough for me and my dress to fit through. When I walked in it was so dark it took several seconds for my eyes to adjust. When I could half see through the dim room I saw a figure come to me from the side and press my against the door, closing it in the process. The click made me jump and just pressed us closer together.
"Damon." I breathed, hardly loud enough to hear my own voice.
"Mmm, Sylvia." He buried his head in my neck. My heart pounded harder and harder and I swear it was going to beat out of my chest. I almost jumped out of own skin for the second time in less than ten seconds when I felt his lips against the skin of my neck. They weren't moving but it didn't stop my body reacting.
"Tell me," his lips moved as he talked and I had to lean my back against the door or I would have fallen into his arms. "are you ready to make this work?" I couldn't move, not even enough to talk. It was like before in the garden when he had me under his spell. I was brought back to the present by lips moving against my skin again but this time I felt them kissing… Damon moved up my neck, planting kisses the whole way. By the time he made it to my jaw I was breathing heavy, hardly able to do anything else.
"Yes, Damon, yes. I'm ready." He pulled back and looked at me and in the blink of an eye his lips were finally on mine. I was shocked at first, didn't know what to do as his lips moved against mine. One of his hands came up my cheek stretching his fingers into my hair. Closing my eyes I gently moved my lips a little, testing his reaction, trying to figure out if I was even doing it right. I quickly learned to mimic his movements and soon I had my arms looped around his neck and was pulling him closer. I didn't even care about taking a breath because all I wanted to do was kiss him more. Feeling something press against my bottom lip I freaked out and pushed him away.
"Don't fight it, just let yourself relax." Still a little unsure I let my hands travel down his chest and rest on his stomach.
"Damon, can we take it slow? I was fifteen when I came here, too young to have done anything, and now you're here…" I didn't know how to finish what I saw saying but, amazingly, he seemed to understand. Raising his hand to my cheek his beautiful blue eyes looked into mine.
"I will wait as long as it takes to be with you, Sylvia." He started to finger the strings holding the front of my dress together. It was a dress much like most of the others in the 1860's although I didn't wear a hoop with this one, it flowed flat but I liked the feeling. It felt free and it was easier to move around in, especially when I was moving around with the brothers. And I guess it worked in this situation as well…
"I've always loved you in this dress, red is really your colour." Not even able to look at his face after what had happened between us in the last few minutes so I stood on my tippy toes, pressing my lips to his cheek and then his mouth before leaving him alone in the dark room.