I'm writing essays at the same time I write this. Someone please shoot me. I am so done with school. I'm dropping out to join the Akatsuki.

Ok, so Deidara teaches Tobi to make art out of clay, and the masked idiot starts making little sculptures for everyone, and Sasori disagrees, because that's not art and it's awful. Everyone's alive, LIKE THEY SHOULD BE, and not dead. That's the whole summary. Oh and Konan makes an appearance because she's awesome.

XxXxXxXx

It was a rather boring day at the Akatsuki hideout. Everyone was doing their own thing and ignoring everyone else. Or, at least they were trying to.

Deidara was sitting in the room he shared with Tobi, absentmindedly forming tiny clay birds that were hopping up and down his shoulders and hair.

"Deidara-Senpai! Look what Tobi made!"

"Put my clay down, Tobi." Deidara growled. The little birds all stared at the masked idiot.

Tobi was holding a rope of clay he had rolled out, looking extremely proud of himself. "It's a snake!"

"It's awful, un."

"Can you teach me to make birds, Senpai? Please?" Tobi asked, sitting on the ground cross-legged as he put the snake on the ground and rolling it along the floor. He made a hissing sound.

"No! Put my clay down! You're going to ruin it, yeah!" Deidara lunged for the clay, sending the tiny birds tumbling off his shoulders. He retrieved the 'snake', which was now covered in various length blonde and black hairs. "Look what you did!"

Tobi stared at the ground. "B-but…Tobi is a good boy! Tobi only wanted to make art like his Senpai! Deidara-Senpai is the best artist!"

Deidara began picking the lint off the clay. "I'm the best, un?" He inquired.

"Yes! Deidara-Senpai has the bestest art in all the Akatsuki!"

Deidara couldn't help but grin. "You're right, Tobi."

"Tobi is always right, because Tobi knows good art!" Tobi replied. He crawled a bit closer to Deidara and picked up one of the fallen birds off its back. "This is good art! And it is so cute!"

"It's not cute, un…" Deidara muttered. He shrugged. "Maybe I could teach you how to make something out of the clay, yeah…"

XxXxXxXx

"LOOK, KONAN! LOOK WHAT TOBI MADE!"

His fellow Akatsuki member jumped at his loud voice and turned around with a slightly irritated look on her face. "What is it, Tobi?"

"LOOK WHAT DEIDARA-SENPAI TAUGHT TOBI TO MAKE!" The masked man was practically jumping up and down.

"It's…a swan?" Konan asked, looking at the tiny and slightly lopsided clay creature in his hands.

"Yes, yes it is! Tobi made it for you, because Tobi is a good boy!"

"For me?" Konan accepted the gift and returned a rare smile. "Thank you, Tobi. I love it."

Tobi squealed with happiness. "I'm glad! I'll tell Senpai, so he can be happy too!"

"I have something for you too, Tobi." Konan pulled a piece of paper from a pocket (at least, from what Tobi could tell) and quickly began to fold and shape it. Tobi watched intensively as the paper began to slowly resemble a swan, much like the one he gave her.

"Even though Deidara insists that his work is art, this is art to me." Konan said, handing the swan to Tobi.

"OOOOH!" Tobi tapped the swan's tiny head. "Tobi likes this art! It's pretty!"

He ran off, squealing the entire way. Konan's smile lingered a bit longer on her face as she took her new sculpture and placed it on the table, as a sort of center piece. She just hoped it wouldn't detonate itself.

XxXxXxXx

"Deidara-Senpai's Senpai? Hallooo?" Tobi slowly pushed open the door to Sasori's room, which for some reason he never had to share with anyone else. Kakuzu said it was because he never slept, but that was crazy, everyone loved to sleep!

He stepped into the room very quietly, because maybe Sasori was sleeping, and he just lied about never sleeping. Instead of a bed, there was a work table that was covered in…dead people?!

"AAAHH!" Tobi shouted, nearly squishing the clay creation he had brought with him.

"What are you doing?" a voice sighed from over by the dead people. One of the people that Tobi thought was dead began to move.

"AHHH TOBI IS A GOOD BOY! DON'T KILL TOBI!" Tobi shrieked, balling up on the floor like a scared basketball.

"I'm not going to kill you, you idiot. What do you want?"

Tobi risked a glance up. Sasori was standing in front of him, glaring. "I'm waiting."

"T-Tobi just wanted to bring D-Deidara-Senpai's Senpai a-art…" Tobi squeaked, getting off the floor that was covered in what looked like a fine layer of sawdust. He held his creation out in front of him, hoping that it wasn't too squished.

"Art?" Sasori frowned. "Is Deidara poisoning your mind with this false concept? His art isn't true."

"B-but…Tobi made it for you…"

Sasori accepted the gift with a sigh. "What is it?"

"It's a puppet!" Tobi forgot about being scared. "Tobi knows you like puppets, but they look like dead people, and that's scary! So this one isn't scary at all!"

Sasori held the puppet for a moment, just staring at it. One of its legs was longer than the other, and half of the right arm was missing. A clumsily-drawn smiley face was painted onto its head.

"…You're right..." Sasori sighed. Truth be told, he found it more unnerving than he thought he did.

"Do you like it, Deidara-Senpai's Senpai?" Tobi gleefully asked.

"…Yes."

"OH BOY!" Tobi squealed. "I'M GLAD!"

"Tobi, would you like to learn how to make real art?" Sasori asked, placing the puppet on his worktable.

"I'M GOOD AT ARTING! TOBI WILL LEARN REAL ART!" Tobi declared.

XxXxXxXx

"Tobi, are you in here?" Deidara pushed open Sasori's door. "…What are you doing, un?" Deidara asked

"Tobi is a good artist!" Tobi said, using a kunai to whittle away at a piece of wood. "Tobi's art will last forever!"

Deidara frowned and cast a glance at Sasori, who was busy painting something dark purple over another kunai and didn't notice. "Art doesn't have to last forever, yeah! Eventually, it will crumble away to nothing!"

Tobi gasped. "I….it will?!"

"Of course it won't." Sasori spoke up. "If preserved correctly, art will last forever."

"How much art do you know of that goes back thousands and thousands of years, un?" Deidara countered.

"All I have to do is look outside. I see an eternal planet, filled with beauty."

"But the trees and animals don't last forever, un! They are constantly changing! Their lives are fleeting and beautiful, like art should be!"

"Tobi likes all art." Tobi said, but the two artists ignored him.

"Your 'art' doesn't deserve to be called art! It is atrocious! It brings shame to true artists!" Sasori's voice rose.

"My art is beautiful, un! Everyone can look at yours and grow bored of it, yeah! But mine is fleeting, and it will remain with whoever sees it forever, un!" Deidara began putting more 'un's and 'yeah's into his speech. He must be really passionate…

"Tobi thinks that Deidara-Senpai's art is nice, and Sasori-Senpai's art is nice too…" Tobi said, but his statement fell on deaf ears.

"You're a terrorist!" Sasori shouted.

"Un! You're a wooden puppet! Wood only fuels my art, yeah!" Deidara shouted back.

"Tobi does not like to do art anymore." Tobi decided.

"I'm going to poison the next thing you eat!" Sasori threatened.

"I'm going to destroy your so-called art, un!" Deidara motioned to the puppets on the workbench.

"HEEEEEY!"

The two of them stared at Tobi, who was now standing and actually shaking with a mixture of fear and anger of being ignored. "Tobi has something to say!"

"Not now, Tobi!" Deidara growled.

Tobi took a deep breath and spoke anyway. "Tobi thinks that Deidara-Senpai's art is really good, and that Sasori-Senpai's art is really good, too! Both arts is good and shouldn't be compared to each other, because they are both pretty and different! They are two things that shouldn't be compared!"

The two artists stared at him, but he continued.

"Tobi likes all arts, even the ones that are really scary like Sasori-Senpai's! Deidara-Senpai's arts are pretty too, but they can be loud sometimes, and that can scare Tobi too. Tobi likes Konan's art."

"…" Sasori said.

"…un." Deidara said.

"Konan's art is kind of like your arts combined!" Tobi said happily. "It is pretty and lasts kind of a long time, but then it can disappear!" He held up the paper swan from earlier. "Arts isn't about who's is better, it's about how it affects someone!"

Both Sasori and Deidara gave a thoughtful nod.

"I never knew you had it in you to make sense." Sasori said.

"So stop fighting? Please?" Tobi asked.

Deidara looked at Sasori. "Don't poison my food, danna."

Sasori huffed a sigh. "Fine."

XxXxXxXx

The end.

I'm sorry if Konan and/or Sasori were out of character, but I really wanted to write them into something.

Please review!

Hasta la Vista, Readers!

Lordoftheghostking28