It was a beautiful day in Konoha. But for some reason, this day was an especially beautiful one.
And the third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, couldn't enjoy any of it. Not with all the reports that had to file after that political fiasco in tea country.
So, when Naruto burst into his office, he had been glad to welcome that distraction from work. That happiness vanished when he heard what Naruto had to say.
"Listen Hokage-jiji, you fucking filthy cretin! Give me my Namikaze heritage now!
I want the estates, the money, the jutsus! Give me them you sly, traitorous piece of vomited out shit. I eat scum like you for breakfast because I had to eat out of the fucking trash for all my life and you dare tell me that I can't have my heritage?
Think again motherfucker!
What I say, as a 12 year old genin, goes, and not whatever you, the leader of this fucking ninja village, order.
So give me my motherfucking heritage or otherwise I will make you bite the curb and I will stomp your head into another fucking dimension before burning this village to the ground!
It means nothing to me! You mean nothing to me! These fucking villagers mean nothing to me, so give me my fucking inheritance or you will not fucking see the light of tomorrow morning you vile, manipulative and silly cunt!"
For a moment, Hiruzen sat there, stunned at those words.
But not for long.
"Naruto, get over here."
"What?"
"GET OVER HERE, I SAID!"
And thus, Naruto got the spanking of his life, which got him to grow up into a model shinobi, an excellent father to his children, and a loving husband for his wife Fuu.
Having an earth golem spank you does wonders to one's character.
The End.