#1
"I don't want to know anything," I said as we laid in bed together.
"Nothing?" he asked in surprise blowing smoke out from the side of his mouth.
"Not a single damn thing," I repeated taking the cigarette from his hand.
"So not when my birthday is, or what my favorite food is or my favorite movie?" he asked laughing some more.
"Don't be a dumbass. I don't want to know if I should feel guilty or not. Your decisions shouldn't be a reason why I feel guilt," I told him as I brought the cigarette to my own lips.
"What makes you think there's something to feel guilty about?" he asked taking it back from me.
"There's always something to feel guilty about. Never has there been a time when there isn't something to feel guilty about. Especially with you Jason," I replied removing the light blue sheet from my body as I got out of bed.
"What are you doing?" he asked as I walked to the dresser.
"I'm getting dressed. You should too," I said grabbing a t-shirt and a pair of underwear.
"Kicking me out already?" he asked smiling at me as I got dressed.
"Yeah, so here get dressed. I'll call you a cab or something," I said walking around the room and picking up his clothes.
When I threw his clothes at him he just gave me a sad smile and got out of the bed. Walking out of the room and down the hall to the kitchen I turned on lights as I went. As I waited for him to leave the room I put some water in the microwave and stared at the revolving glass measuring cup through the window on the door.
"Are you married?" he asked walking into the room.
"God no far from it. Why are you asking?" I asked as the microwave beeped.
"Well you're kicking me out at three in the morning after we had sex. Seems like something someone who's married would do," he said crossing his arms across his still shirtless chest.
"Trust me I'm not married. And I'm kicking you out because I have shit to do in a few hours and I need to sleep," I replied as I put a tea bag in the oversized coffee mug and poured the water in.
"Okay well uh no need to call me a cab. A friend of mine lives close by." he said grabbing his shoes.
"For what it counts I had a lot of fun okay, it was good to see you again. I just don't really do this type of shit," I explained.
"What have random sex?"
"No that I have. I just never bring them to my place, it's usually their place," I said using my finger to test the temperature.
"Oh well, I had fun to and you look real good Sam," he said before opening the glass door and walking out of the house.
Sighing I picked up my mug and walked to the door making sure to lock it and turn on the porch light. As I continued to walk back to my room I turned all the lights back off and made sure the doors and windows were locked. When I walked into the bedroom I looked around, you could only tell that another person had been in it by how the bed looked and the smell of sweat in the room.
Turning on the light I sat my mug on the dresser and walked to the wall of windows and opened the middle one tying the curtains off so they didn't blow around. Facing the bed I grabbed the pillows and threw them off the bed doing the same with the comforter, ripping the sheets off the bed I threw them on the floor in the corner. This was why I didn't bring guys home. Turning towards the closet I began looking for the blue fitted sheet that was going to be on the bed this time.
After I fixed the bed I grabbed the gray comforter and laid back down on the bed. Sighing I turned on the TV and started flipping.
I knew I was crazy in kicking Jason out. But when you see someone you used to love and you just have the gut feeling of pure animalistic need sometimes you need to let that happen. Let the raw experience take over and build again and again.
The next morning I woke up to a slight hangover and walked to the kitchen in search of coffee. I started the coffee pot and grabbed the bottle of cold brew I had in the fridge.
"Are those new underwear?" I heard a voice ask from behind me.
"FUCK!" I yelled turning around to face the voice.
"Did I scare you?" he asked laughing to himself from his spot at the breakfast bar.
"What the hell are you doing here Lucky? I thought that you were working or some shit?" I asked walking over to the cabinet and getting two tumblers out.
"I got in last night and when I went to the party Carly told me you had already left so I came here and crashed in the spare room," he said accepting the cup I handed him.
"Wait you were here last night?" I asked freezing in place.
"Oh yeah, sounded like you had some fun. So who was the guy?" he asked smiling at me.
"I am not talking about my one night stand with you. How was court?" I asked taking a drink of the cold brew.
"It was court. I don't know, she won't do the test or sign the papers. I just don't know what to do anymore, I want to be there for the kid but if it's not mine I don't want to get attached and then have some other guy come in and say he's the father."
"Well do you love her?" I asked leaning forward and putting my arms on the counter.
"I don't think its love anymore. I think it's more I love what we had and the possibility that we might have a baby together is a lot to deal with."
"Have you talked to your mother about this?" I asked grabbing a straw from the drawer underneath me.
"Fuck no, what am I going to say 'hey mom so you know the girl that I married one night in Vegas that you hate, well we are getting divorced because she fucked around on me and now she says she's pregnant and it's mine. So how are the kids?' It was bad enough that I told her about the divorce, she doesn't need to know about the baby yet, not till I know for sure," he said looking down at his cup.
"So how much did you hear from last night?" I asked knowing that he wanted to change the subject.
"I heard enough," he said smiling at me.
"Fuck," I muttered as I walked to the coffee pot.
"You know I knew you said that a lot but after last night I had no idea you said it so much."
"Well you know if it's good, it's good."
"Well at least one of us is getting something. So you my friend go show the world your slutty ways," he said getting up from the stool.
"I feel like that should be an insult but I'm going to take it as a compliment because I am liking my slutty ways. Besides it's not like I'm going to be getting much nights where I can go and enjoy my slutty ways," I said grabbing the creamer from the fridge as he grabbed the mugs.
"So who was the bed buddy last night?" he asked as I poured coffee into the mugs.
"No idea, I met him at the bar last night. Don't give me that look you have your own string of one night stands. And I get rid of them for you, at least I got rid of my own." I said laughing at him.
"Are you working today?" he asked as I jumped onto the counter.
"Yeah, that shoot I had to scout for last week we are doing that today. And then I have to get the shit for the beauty shoot and I still have to try and get in to see Spinneli about the layouts of the new beauty section on the website," I said taking a sip of the cold brew as I added creamer to the hot coffee.
"Have you met with the new editor?" he asked taking his creamer from the fridge.
"Nope, I have been avoiding that for as long as possible. It's bad enough I have to sit and deal with Carly and Sonny today, I don't need to be meeting the new editor that is going to hate me. I already have a stressful day ahead of me that I need to get ready for. You coming out to the shoot today?" I asked hopping off the counter and grabbing my mug of hot coffee.
"I might stop by. They are trying some new guy today so Sonny wants me there just in case he's failure."
"Well I'm going to go shower, have to get the one night stand off me and you know try and look like I have my shit together," I said walking off towards the bathroom.
"Don't forget your bag!" he yelled after me.
"Thank you dear!" I yelled back before closing the door.
Setting my cup on the counter I walked to the shower turning the knob and stepping back as it started to heat up. Looking back in the mirror I saw myself as I drank out of the big black coffee cup. The brown hair dyed a combination of dark red and purple, and the light tan was all that stood out. I had oddly tweezed eyebrows thanks to middle school and a nervous habit that had been kicked all but two years ago. Sighing I took off the t-shirt and my underwear and got under the hot spray.
When I got out I grabbed my coffee cup and wrapped a towel around myself and walked to my room.
"You still here?" I yelled as I walked down the hall.
"Yeah why?" Lucky yelled back.
"Just wondering," I yelled before closing my door.
As I got dressed I tried to get everything I would need for the shoot ready also. I found the concept folders with everyone's looks and found the shorts for the beach, as I grabbed the makeup kits I grabbed my bra and a tank top and put them on while standing in front of the door.
"Hey your phone is ringing," Lucky yelled from the other side of the door.
"Fuck, don't sneak up on me like that," I yelled at him as I opened the door and put my tank top on.
"Well your phone won't shut up. I'm slightly hungover and it's annoying. So take it please," he said thrusting it at me.
"Fuck it's Carly," I said grabbing it.
"Hello?" I asked as I walked back into my room.
"Where are you? We are already at the site and your aren't," she said sounding annoyed.
"Well Carly darling, you had this thing last night called an engagement party where a lot of alcohol was consumed and served. But despite that I am on my way so you can calm your tits and I will be there. Now drink your coffee and good bye," I said hanging up.
"Did you just tell your bosses fiancée to calm her tits?" Lucky asked before flinging himself on my unmade bed.
"Yes, now can you help me carry this shit to the car?" I asked grabbing my purse and a black zip up.