Okay, so I'm not actually a huge fan of Clintasha, I think Hawkeye and Black Widow should just be super awesome assassin bros. But I'm at my friend's (SilentFaith's, she's a really good writer, look up Second Gen Initiative) house and we're having an Avengers marathon and I'm hopped up on various kinds of Coke and goldfish and pizza and cupcakes, so yeah. Crackfic. ANYways, here goes.

Clink clink! Tony continued to talk to Bruce, though everyone else had ceased at the sound of Agent Barton (THE HAWK-MAN!) tapping his spoon against his wine glass. CLINKCLINKCLINKCLINKCLINKCLI NKCLINK KSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH! Clint hit the glass so hard it broke. Tony looked up as Clint glared at him, the stem of his glass still clenched in his hand.

"Dude. Why'd you break my glass?" Tony said. "That's one of my favorite collections, man. Pep-"

"Tony!" Clint looked ready to kill. After all, he was an assassin.

"What?!"

"I'd like to make an announcement." Clint ground his teeth. Why was he so irritable lately? He leaped at the chance to defend Natasha whenever anyone said the slightest thing against her, even when Tony was just teasing her. Oops. I've started thinking in 3rd person. Again. Maybe it's time to lay off the drinks. Nah. I'll be fine. I've had worse hangovers.

"So what's stopping you?" Clint glared. Again. Man, he gives a lot of those lately. "Okay then. Someone's cranky lately."

"ANYways. As I was saying, I'd like to make an announcement." He smiled at Natasha. "Agent Romanov... Natasha and I are... well, we're going to... what I'm trying to say is..."

"UGH, just spit it out already! I'm getting a headache! Put your money where your mouth is." Clint started towards him.

"I'll put my arrows up your-"

"What he's trying to say," Natasha said cooly as she stood up and placed a hand on Clint's chest, stopping him. "Is that we're engaged to be married."

"Oh come on!" Clint and Natasha both gave Tony sharp looks. Tony sighed as he dug deeply in his pocket, and finally produced a few 100 dollar bills. Pepper smiled as she reached across the table and took the money from him. Clint and Natasha exchanged glances. Quid putredinem? Nat! No one speaks Latin! Cut it out! ANNNDDDD talking to myself again. I can usually handle a whole lot more drinks than this. What did Tony put in this?

"Um, you made a bet about-"

"It was Pepper's idea!" Tony was quick to blurt out. Of course.

"Tony, you can't just blame other people for every-" Bruce began.

"Oh, I can't blame other people? What about that time in the lab when-" Tony retorted.

"Tony, you always start things-" Pepper argued. Only the captain and the Asgardian didn't join the argument. They just shook their heads and continued eating.

"You know, this meal would be better if there were poptarts included." Thor muttered. Captain Rogers sighed.

"You think everything would be better with poptarts, Thor." Steve replied. Thor grinned.

"Indeed."

So, yeah. Crackfic. Didja like it? Review and tell me. There will be more chapters coming soon, including their wedding. Many amusing and kinda frustrating memories for Natasha and Clint will come from that.