Title: Tomorrow and Forever
Author: Ronda Sexton
Series: TOS
Code: Spock/Chapel
Rating: PG13
Part: 1/1
Archive: ASC, ACSEM, BLTS, and Spock and Christine List
Only moments after Sargon and Thalassa's departure, Christine suddenly
felt light-headed. She swayed, and as her world faded to black, she
crumpled to the deck.
Dr. McCoy was at her side immediately, while at the same time,
Lieutenant Uhura was calling for orderlies to bring a stretcher to the
bridge.
Christine came to in sickbay. She was confused momentarily, and her
last memory was Thalassa and Sargon's departure.
Dr. McCoy came into view. "That was quite a scare you gave us,
Christine. How do you feel?"
"A little dizzy. What happened?" she asked.
"You fainted on the bridge. I could not find anything wrong with you,
except some elevation of certain brain chemicals. That could be
attributed to what happened to you," he explained. "As soon as your
dizziness passes, you may return to your quarters. I want you to rest.
You are off duty for the next twenty-four hours."
She nodded her head and closed her eyes, willing the dizziness to go
away.
Four days later, Christine was preparing a report for a briefing. She
winced as a pain lanced through her head. She had not mentioned these
pains to Dr. McCoy, nor had she mentioned her other symptoms. She had
been very nervous and restless. It felt as if a part of her were
missing. There was no way to explain this to Dr. McCoy with him
assuming she was imagining these things since Spock's consciousness had
been instilled in her. She knew it wasn't her imagination, but doubted
that anyone else would believe her. After privately checking herself
over, she discovered the same brain chemicals were still elevated. She
decided it was safe to assume she was still reacting the melds Henoch
had forced on her, as well as Spock's consciousness being instilled in
her with little preparation beforehand.
Sighing, Christine left for the meeting, hoping no pains would strike
during her presentation. This would also be the first time she had
seen Spock since sharing consciousness with him that day. She was not
looking forward to this meeting. She knew she'd made a fool of herself
on the bridge that day prior to fainting and had been successful in
avoiding him until now.
Quietly taking her seat, she stared around the room. She hated making
presentations, but in this case, her expertise in biochemical research
had enabled her to develop a successful vaccine for Antarian Bacterial
Encephalitis. Too bad her expertise had not been able to cure her own
annoying symptoms. As her gaze landed on Spock, disquieting emotions
rampaged through her soul. She quickly looked away.
Spock noted the confused expression that crossed her face as their eyes
met. He theorized that perhaps she was still suffering the after
effects of his consciousness being instilled into her. He had been
spending quite a bit of time in unsuccessful meditation in an effort to
settle himself after that incident. He had not approached Dr. McCoy
about the issue. He did not wish to be the unwilling recipient of the
good Doctor's teasing.
Kirk called the meeting to order. As she sat through the
preliminaries, pains began to lance through her head in rapid succession. Emotions
boiled within her. It took ever ounce of control she possessed not to
bolt and run out of the room.
Finally, he part of the meeting came. She stood up and activated the
viewscreen on the wall. Just as she started to speak, the pains grew
so intense that she doubled over, gasping in pain.
Dr. McCoy and Spock rushed to her side. Spock was beginning to suspect
exactly what her problem was because he was experiencing similar
symptoms.
Later, in sickbay, Spock very candidly discussed his suspicions with
Dr. McCoy and Christine. He carefully explained his theory of the nature
of the symptoms both he and Christine were experiencing.
"I believe it is the Son-la-lee-kah," he said quietly.
They stared at him in confusion. Neither of them was familiar with the
Vulcan term.
"Can you enlighten us on exactly what that means, Mr. Spock?" asked Dr.
McCoy.
"Son-la-lee-kah is a term that means an incomplete or partial bonding.
The symptoms Miss Chapel and I are experiencing are consistent with the
indicators for the condition," explained Spock.
Christine frowned. This did not bode well for either of them. "So how
do we confirm this, Mr. Spock?"
"A Vulcan healer must meld with us simultaneously. He will then
ascertain whether or not that is the problem," answered Spock.
Christine found herself growing uneasy. She sensed that this was more
complicated than Spock was indicating. The medication Dr. McCoy had
given her had eased the pains, but done nothing for her increasing
anxiety levels.
"If the problem turns out to be Son-la-lee-kah, what will be done to
cure us?" she asked as calmly as she possibly could.
"There are many factors involved," began Spock. "The Healer can assist
in dissolving the partial bond in most cases. However, in 25.473% of
the cases, it can't be dissolved."
"Why not?" asked Christine.
"It depends on a person's brain chemistry," he answered. "If the
Healer is unable to dissolve the bond, the man and woman must bond fully."
Christine stared at Spock in shock. "What happens if they don't wish
to bond?" She knew Spock did not want her. She certainly did not want
him under these circumstances. Only if he chose to be with her of his own
free will did she want to be with him.
Spock shook his head. "They must become bondmates, or madness followed
by death is inevitable."
Christine paled visibly, and Dr. McCoy placed a comforting hand over
her own. "We can be to Vulcan in four days. Will that be soon enough?" he
asked.
"It will suffice," replied Spock.
"I'll inform the Captain," Dr. McCoy said as he rose from his seat.
Christine started to rise from her chair as well, intending to return
to her quarters and rest.
"Miss Chapel, I would like to speak of this further with you," stated
Spock.
She sat back down, resting her head on one hand, so that her face was
partially obscured. Right now, she wanted to be anywhere but here.
Since Spock outranked her, she had little choice in the matter.
"I must inform you that upon review of Dr. McCoy's testing data, it is
highly probable that we will be forced to complete the bond." Spock's
voice betrayed no emotion whatsoever.
Christine felt trapped. She had loved him for so long. She had longed
for a relationship with him, but not like this. She did not want it
forced upon them. She wanted to be a relationship of their choosing.
"I see," she said.
Spock was caught off guard by Christine's obvious distress. He knew
she cared deeply for him. He had not anticipated her reacting in this
manner.
"Very well, there will be time enough to worry about that after the
healer examines us," stated Christine in as steady of a tone as she
could muster. "If you will excuse me, I need to go back to my
quarters and rest now." She quietly rose and hurried out of the room.
Knowing his parents needed to be informed, Spock returned to his
quarters and established contact with them. After the formal
greetings, Spock carefully explained what had transpired.
After hearing Spock's report, Sarek nodded gravely. "I concur with
your theory, my son. Sanel will be able to verify it and determine whether
or not the bond may be dissolved or if it must be completed."
"Spock, how does Christine feel about this?" asked Amanda gently.
"She is distressed," stated Spock.
"That is understandable, Spock," began Amanda. "It had to be a huge
shock to her."
"Mother, Miss Chapel has long desired a relationship with me. Now that
it appears to be a possibility based on the current data, suddenly the
idea is not nearly as appealing to her. It is highly illogical."
Sarek glanced thoughtfully at his wife for a few moments. "Spock," he
began. "Consider how you have treated Miss Chapel in the past. I
observed your interactions with her while we were confined in sickbay
during the trip to the Babel conference. Your treatment of her was
completely devoid of any warmth or appreciation for her care. She may
assume a bonding with you will merely be a continuation of the same."
"No Vulcan would treat his bondmate in such a fashion, father."
"Spock, she is not Vulcan. She does not fully understand the nature of
the bond. You must speak with her and explain the bondmate
relationship," instructed Sarek.
"I shall endeavor to do so, father," replied Spock.
Suddenly the console beeped, informing his time was up.
"I must take my leave of you now, mother and father. Live long, and
prosper."
"Live, Long, and Prosper, my son," they answered. Then the screen
darkened.
Spock decided it would be best to allow Christine several hours to rest
before attempting to explain the bondmate relationship to her. He
would use that time to meditate in an effort to balance himself prior to the
discussion.
Four hours later, Christine warily admitted Spock to her quarters. She
was still in shock at the possibility of being bonded for life to a man
who did not love her.
After they had both sat down, Spock began carefully explaining the
bondmate relationship using his parents as an example.
When he finished, he took her hand in his. "You will not lack for that
which you need, Christine."
She nodded, not sure how to respond to him.
Four days later, they arrived at Vulcan. Sanel was able to see them
immediately. He initiated a meld with them. So gentle was the touch
of his mind that Christine's fears brought on by Henoch's forced melds
faded away.
After a time, he withdrew from their minds. Without saying a word to
either of them, he called up the data Dr. McCoy had been gathering on
them. Then, he turned to face them.
"It is indeed Son-la-lee-kah. Based on all available data it is
imperative for the two of you to bond as soon as possible. To do
otherwise will result in madness and death within a week.
They nodded in understanding. Christine felt the world crashing down
around her. She would be bonded to Spock, or they both would die. She
felt trapped by circumstance, but she could not allow Spock to die, nor
did she want to die either.
"I would further advise you to bond now, so that I may assist you if
necessary."
Spock looked at Christine. She knew she had no alternative, so she
nodded her assent. He turned back to Sanel. "We will do so."
They both placed their hands in position and began speaking the words
of the ritual.
"Christine, parted from me, yet never parted. Never and always
touching and touched. Be Thou one with me."
"Spock, parted from me, yet never parted. Never and always touching
and touched. I am one with thee."
Spock delved deeply into her mind to form a strong and complete bond.
After they withdrew from the bonding meld, Sanel touched their minds
again to verify the bonding.
Following a brief visit to Spock's parents, they beamed back aboard the
ship. Christine tried to ignore the curious stares that followed them.
There was too much to be accomplished today to be concerned with nosy
crew members. All of her belongings had to be packed and moved to
Spock's quarters. Kirk had made a general announcement about their
bonding earlier. Christine was not certain she was ready to share
quarters with Spock, but not doing so would see the entire ship abuzz
with gossip. This was all so sudden. She wondered how she could live
for the rest of her life with a man who did not love or care for her.
When her possessions were unpacked in Spock's quarters, she sat
uneasily on the sofa, not exactly sure what to expect next. She had long
dreamed of being Spock's wife. However, her dreams had become a real life
nightmare. Either they could fully bond with each other or go insane
and die. Why did it have to be this way?
Spock sat near her on the sofa and handed her a package that had been
carefully wrapped.
"It is traditional for the man to give a gift to his bondmate when the
bonding occurs between adults."
She took the gift and opened it carefully. Inside the box, she found
an elegant white gown of pure silk. She stared at the gown, then at
Spock. She was uncertain what to think. Did Spock intend for them to
engage in intimacies, or had he merely selected this gift as a random
choice.
"I selected blue because it is an ascetically pleasing color on you,"
commented Spock. He closely observed her, gauging her reaction. He
knew she was unhappy that fate had forced this relationship upon them.
He was trying to make her comfortable with the situation. He could not
understand why after desiring a relationship with him that now she did
not want to be his bondmate.
"Thank you, Spock," she said softly.
He sensed her uncertainty through their bond and decided that a change
of subject was in order. "We should eat our evening meal now. Would
you prefer to eat here or in the mess hall?" asked Spock.
Christine wanted to avoid prying eyes as long as possible. She had
been subjected to them enough today. "I prefer to eat here," she answered.
"Very well," began Spock. "What would you like to eat?"
She shook her head. "It doesn't really matter. I'll eat whatever you
order from the food slot."
Spock got trays for both of them. He watched as Christine ate her meal
in silence. He did not know what to do. She was very unhappy. He
sincerely hoped that engaging in intimacies tonight would assure her
that he could meet her needs.
When she finished her meal, she carried the tray back to the food slot
and pressed the recycle button. She turned to find Spock behind her.
He slid his tray into the slot, recycled it, and placed a hand on her
shoulder.
"It would please me if you wore the gown to bed tonight," said Spock.
Christine felt his desire through their bond. She nodded and moved so
that his hand was no longer on her shoulder. Legally, there were
husband and wife. Sex was a normal part of married life. It appeared
that Spock intended for them to be sexually active. She could not
bring herself to think of it as making love. To her, that implied that the
couple engaged in the act out of love, not duty. Right now, she felt
absolutely nothing for Spock. She also knew he felt nothing for her.
Their marriage was not one of love, it was a marriage for survival.
There were trapped in a loveless marriage.
Slowly she retrieved the gown from the couch. Spock watched as she
entered the bathroom, gown in hand. He assumed she intended to change
and began to prepare himself for bed as well.
Christine stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. The blue gown
clung to her body revealing every soft curve. She was nervous, but it did
not make sense. She was certainly not a virgin. Neither was Spock for
that matter. She resolved to do her "duty" as Spock's wife. Sighing, she
walked out of the bathroom.
Spock watched as she walked out. The sight of her in the clinging blue
gown aroused his passions. He held out his right hand, extending his
first two fingers in the Vulcan fashion.
She walked slowly over to him, her eyes locked on his. When she
reached him, she placed her fingers on his. The bond link opened fully and she
felt his passion and desire wash over her. It ignited a fire within
her. He moved his fingers to caress over her hand and then back to her
fingers again. He stared at her, his eyes smoldering. His gaze urged
her to copy his caress. She complied, feeling desire burning
throughout her being.
She was amazed that such a simple touch could arouse her with such
passion. They continued for several more rounds, then Spock allowed
his fingers to trail up her arm. She felt as if they were on fire and
leaving trails of flame up her arm. He continued across her shoulder
and up her neck to her chin. He lifted her face to his and tenderly
kissed her. As his hot tongue probed her mouth the bond link opened
even more. She wrapped her arms around him and surrendered to his
will.
Later, laying in Spock's possessive embrace as he slept beside her, she
considered the intimacies they had just indulged in. Spock was a
fantastic lover. Her intense orgasm had rocked her entire body. She
had never experienced one that powerful. If she had to be in a
loveless marriage, great sex would be some compensation. She was tired,
so she succumbed to the sleepiness.
Days passed, and the gossip finally began to die down. The only gossip
that continued marginally was centered on the fact that Christine
seemed incredibly unhappy for someone who had married the man of her
dreams.
"Christine, I would like to talk with you. Come into my office
please," said Dr. McCoy. Nodding, she followed him inside and sat
down.
"How are things going?" he asked gently.
Christine sighed, "It's so strange, for such a long time, I wanted a
relationship with Spock. It certainly did not happen the way I dreamed
it would." Unshed tears glittered in her eyes. "I can't seem to feel
anything for him. The only time I feel connected to him is when we
have sex," she confessed.
"How does Spock feel about the relationship?" asked Dr. McCoy.
"He....he....I don't really know if he feels anything for me. He
didn't have much of a choice in bonding with me." She shook her head.
"I never wanted him this way. I wanted him to be with me by his
choice. Instead we had to bond or die. Not a lot of choice in that."
"Christine, give him time. T'Pring's betrayal and rejection was hard
on him. Harder than he will ever be willing to admit." He noticed that
it was time for shift change. "Well, you're off duty now, so I won't keep
you any longer. Hang in there."
"Thanks, Leonard," she whispered softly as she left his office to
return to the quarters she now shared with Spock.
When she entered, Spock turned from tending the fire pot. He offered
her the two finger gesture which she returned. Her on going sorrow
troubled him. He was uncertain what to do. Would she reject him at
his next Pon Farr as T'Pring had. He quickly banished the negative
thoughts from his mind. As was his custom, after holding the two finger touch
for a few moments, he gently kissed her.
Christine withdrew and prepared to go to the mess hall for dinner.
Time passed, and Christine and Spock's relationship continued in its
status quo for the most part. Their sex life was still great, and when
they were locked in passion filled encounters, she was beginning to
feel emotions she thought were long dead thawing. Spock sensed this as
well, but outside of their physical encounters, they were still very much
withdrawn from each other.
Today, they were involved in assisting a colony world that had
experienced a severe earthquake. Christine had been assigned to work
in a hospital in one of the hardest hit areas. Spock felt uneasy about
her being planetside. There was no logical reason for him to feel in such
a manner. However, he could not resolve the feelings no matter how
hard he tried.
Down on the surface of Datalas Prime, Christine worked feverishly
treating patients who had been injured in the latest after shocks.
Suddenly the floor began to buck under her feet as the ground shook
violently. As the walls collapsed around her, her last conscious
thought was *I love you, Spock,* then darkness consumed her.
In sickbay, Dr. McCoy stood next to Spock as he gazed at her battered,
broken body.
"I've done all I can, Spock," he said. "We can only wait and see what
happens."
"Is there anything I can do to help her?" asked Spock.
Dr. McCoy looked at Spock. He knew his friend well enough to see the
pain in his eyes. "Try talking to her, Spock. Coma patients can
sometimes hear."
Spock sat in the bedside chair as Dr. McCoy walked out of the small ICU
cubicle. He picked up her hand and held it in both of his. He could
not believe that he might lose her. He was going to do everything in
his power to prevent that from happening.
"Christine," he murmured huskily. He stared down at her body that was
so pale and still. "Christine, I....I need you so much...."
Words failed him, and he sat holding her hand.
When Dr. McCoy checked later, Spock was still clinging to her hand. He
looked at the monitors her condition remained unchanged.
Spock looked at him, the question in his mind easy to read on his face.
"There's no change, Spock. I'm sorry." he said gravely.
"May I try to reach her through our bond?" asked Spock.
Dr. McCoy nodded, "You can try. You may be able to reach her."
Spock released her hand and immediately place his hands in the proper
position on her face. Dr. McCoy left quietly to give him privacy as he
attempted to reach his bondmate.
Sitting in his office, Dr. McCoy realized that Spock was taking this
very hard. He wondered if this would ultimately change their
relationship if Christine pulled through. Her depressed state prior to
suffering the massive injuries could make her less willing to fight to
recover.
If Spock touched her mind and let her see how much he cared, it could
make a huge difference.
Spock delved into her mind, searching for her. At last he touched upon
her consciousness. //Christine?// There was no response.
//Christine, please, I...I...// Spock's thoughts faltered, and he sensed her
beginning to slip away. In desperation, he call to her again.
//Christine, my T'hy'la//
//Spock?//
He sensed her uncertainty. //Yes, it is me, T'hy'la.// Slowly he
dropped his shielding letting warm loving feelings flow freely.
//I love you too, Spock.// Then her consciousness flickered and faded.
Spock tried to reestablish the meld to no avail. He carefully examined
the monitors. The readings had changed. He quickly summoned Dr.
McCoy.
When he saw the monitors, he smiled. "Well, it seems reaching out via
your bond has had some positive effect on her condition. These
readings have improved." He looked at Spock. "You need to get some rest."
"I prefer to stay here with Christine," answered Spock firmly.
"I understand, Spock." He quietly left the cubicle.
The next morning, Christine's vital signs had improved even more.
Captain Kirk, after hearing Dr. McCoy's report, relieved Spock of duty
so he could sit with her.
By noon, her vital signs had stabilized, and she was showing signs that
she was coming out of the coma. Late that afternoon, she came to with
an awareness of someone holding her hand. Her eyes focused on the
person holding her hand.
"Spock?"
"Yes, I am here. How do you feel?"
"Terrible....I hurt everywhere. What happened?"
Spock tightened his grip on her hand. "What do you remember?"
"I was on the planet working in the Emergency ward. Everything started
shaking.....was there another after shock?"
"Yes, and you were badly injured when the walls collapsed on you. I
almost lost you," Spock said solemnly. "Dr. McCoy allowed me to try to
reach you through our bond."
"I remember....you.....you called me T'hy'la." whispered
Christine.
"Yes, I did call you T'hy'la. Faced with the prospect of losing you, I
discovered just how much you mean to me. I regret that our first
months as bondmates were so difficult."
Christine slowly extended her right hand to Spock in the Vulcan
fashion. He responded immediately. Love and understanding flowed
freely through their bond.
It was a week before Christine was well enough to be discharged from
sickbay. During that time she and Spock grew closer and closer.
A week after her release, the doctor pronounced her well enough to
resume intimacies. That night they made love to each other. It was so
much more than the sex they had been having prior to her life
threatening injuries. Love flowed through their bond and each touch
and caress seemed to be enhanced by that love. All the barriers were gone.
They would be gone tomorrow and forever. They were one.