A/N Frankly, this piece of work scares me. It scares me to know that I've written something like this, and I'm not exactly proud of it, but here it is.
Warnings: This is a short piece and it does not go into explicit detail, but there are mentions of rape, sex and slight abuse. This is not a fic for minors and that's why it's rated M.
Disclaimer: Let's be reasonable now, shall we?
"You are mine, Yuuta." Sharp blue eyes bore into a brown-haired skull and a pale hand gripped a tanned arm. "Nothing's going to change that." For the first time in a long time, Fuji Syuusuke said this sentence with fierce blue eyes in the open and a sharp undertone in his voice. He wasn't joking.
"I'll protect you from that demon." Yuuta flinched as his older brother's hand dug deeper into his skin, ensuring that there'd be marks left over the next day.
"Yuuta." The simple word that left the usually smiling lips stroke fear into the heart of the younger boy. He looked around him, anxious for a way out, but as usual, his brother had no holes in his plan.
He never thought it'd be like this. He'd never imagined that just a simple visit home would lead to being dragged and locked into his brother's bedroom, thrown onto the bed and grasped by the arm by clouded blue eyes. He knew his brother was strong, but never this much.
"I know what happened." The blue eyes narrowed. "But I don't want to believe it." Yuuta gulped and closed his eyes, willing the image of his serious brother to go away. However, even as he squeezed his eyes shut, he could still feel that unmistakable stare on him, prying at his defences.
"Tell me what happened, Yuuta." Yuuta shook his head, eyes still closed and mouth shut even firmer. He wouldn't tell his brother, no matter what happened. This just wasn't his place to stick his nose in. He just wouldn't.
And even if he did want to tell… Even if he was aching to tell the one caring person that was always there for him, the one he wanted to embrace and pour out the whole story to…
How could he?
How could he tell his brother about Mizuki, someone Syuusuke didn't even acknowledge as a human being? How could he tell him about how his own heart beat faster every time a smirk or a twirl of the hair was directed his way?
How could he tell him about the kisses they shared, the searing hot struggles they had with each other at night, the ones that bound the two together in such ways that Yuuta could barely even sleep at night anymore?
How could he tell him about how gradually those kisses turned more forceful than soft and more possessive than gentle? How could he tell him about the slow changes in Mizuki that started to eat away at Yuuta's mind?
How could he tell him about how those sleepless nights turned from dreamily sleepless to fearfully sleepless? How could he tell him how scared he suddenly was of the smirking manager, and how he started to mistrust his own team mates?
How could he tell him about all those nights he spent in his room, eyes wide awake and looking around frightfully because he was so scared that he thought that person would even attack him in his sleep?
How could he tell him that after those kisses lost their passion, each time he was forced into one behind the clubhouse at practice he never fought back, always so scared to move?
How could he tell him that the real reason he was coming home for Christmas was that he just didn't want to be anywhere near that purple-clad scoundrel, even though at night he'd still be unable to sleep for fear of getting attacked with those kisses and those hands…?
How could he tell him about the never ending darkness that bit at his soul, every time he saw Mizuki? How could he tell him about the way his body shivered and the way his eyes darted around, landing on everything but the manager?
How could he tell him about the night before he came home, the night his brother wanted to know exactly about?
How could he tell him about the purring Mizuki made when he finally decided to infiltrate Yuuta's room when everyone one else was sleeping, whispering to him that he'd give the younger boy "An early Christmas gift"?
How could he tell him about the forcefully passionate kiss after that whisper that left Yuuta breathless and in a state of total weakness?
How could he tell him about the way Mizuki slid the clothes off of the boy slowly and painfully, dragging his nails against his skin as he did so, like a cat playing with a new toy?
About the way Mizuki devoured him from head to toe, not leaving one small inch of his body unexplored with that horrible, horrible mouth of his? About the way Yuuta had to cover his mouth with all his might so that no one'd hear his screams of pleasure, his screams of pain, and the sobs that wracked his entire body?
About how Mizuki had it planned all along, and how simply evil he looked when he pulled off his own clothing, along with some condoms and a tube of lube? About how through Yuuta's tears of betrayal and hurt and pain, nothing prepared him for the sight of all that pale white skin, looking so innocent yet so malicious?
About how Mizuki whispered endearments of nothingness into his ear and his pleasured grunts, along with "Oh, how happy your brother will be," and other such phrases that crawled down Yuuta's spine and made him so, so scared? About how Mizuki kept on saying this, over and over again, as he did to Yuuta what no other person had done before, as he took away his precious innocence?
About how it had hurt so much, that act of joining together two bodies that everyone else craved for? About how Yuuta prayed in his mind the whole time to drown out Mizuki's words and tune out the feeling of Mizuki's tongue in his mouth while he penetrated the younger boy to exhaustion?
About how Mizuki left him after the ten minutes that had felt like an hour, sprawled on his bed sheets, crying and hurting and bleeding?
About how devastated he was, praying to God that it was all a dream and it had never happened and please just let me go home?
About how when the next day he woke up earlier than everyone else to board the train for his beloved home when he found out that he couldn't walk properly, there were marks all over his body and his lips were swollen and bruised?
About how when he suppressed his tears and anger to finally leave the dormitory to hear a small, proud, "Nfu"?
About how just before he hobbled out of the dormitory, he was pulled into another kiss that made shivers run through his whole body and his heart ache with a dull thud?
About how mortified he was as he was greeted by a shocked sister and taken away in a hurry by an angry brother?
About how utterly suicidal he felt?
"Yuuta." The eyes went gentle and the tone pleaded with sincerity. "Please. Please tell me."
Yuuta shook his head, his body feeling numb.
Syuusuke shook his head in remorse, closing his eyes and leaving the room for the time being to bring his brother breakfast.
Yuuta collapsed onto his brother's bed, his sobs muffled by the pillows. "How could I?" He croaked out. "How can I?"
How could he tell him that despite it all… he had liked it when Mizuki kissed him?
