Loki. A Thor Parody:
"Hey um...can you get up?.."A voice said, nudging him, then poking him with a stick.
"Ugh...what happened...?"Loki mumbled, the memories occurred in his mind. He left Asgard, well, fell from the bi-frost.
"Yeah...um...how do I say this with offending you..."She started to pace. Loki had taken notice they were in a forest of some kind, and it was extremely dark.
"Okay...Are you an alien?"She said calmly slightly shivering.
"No. I am Loki. Loki the god of Mischief!"
"A god?Like Mythology?" She tilted her head. Loki narrowed his eyebrows at her.
"I never knew Midgardians, were very dull to recognize...just like my idiotic brother." The girl stood up,
"Okay, well bye." This young woman started to walk, whistling, not really caring that she found a 'god' or a man in the middle of the woods.
"You can't leave me here!" He yelled.
"Yeah I can!I'm doing it right now!"She yelled.
Loki ran over to her, almost losing his balance. Loki started to run after her. " Okay!I suppose you can stay with me." She smiled.
After some walking, and moments of awkward silences, they arrived at her house.
"Okay this is my house, it's not the greatest of places, but hey it's home..." She said looking at him.
"Excuse me, but I never got your name."He looked at her.
She blushed,"I-It's (Name), I'm GOING TO SLEEP!"She ran to her room.
"Very strange..."
She started to change into her pajamas, but that wasn't helping her get her mind off of that guy in the next room.
(Name) sucked her pride, and gained her courage, she opened her door, only to see the stranger gone.
"What the-"
"Meow"
A cat purred. (Name) looked down to see a kitty purring snuggling against her ankle.
"Hello kitty!Wait did I just...Nevermind...Have you seen that man alien thing?"
"Meow."
"Maybe he left...Eh...Not my problem."
She picked up the kitty, it looked at her. They looked at each other, until she started shaking.
"This is kinda weird...You are a very intimidating little thing, aren't you?"
She carried the cat, while walking to her room, she had set the cat down. Both (Name) and it laid on the bed.
This cat was black, with these weird green eyes, she found it quite charming. (Name) grabbed her computer, typing some words in her search engine,
"What was his name?Luki?Lucky? No..."The cat's ears perked up, listening intently. "No...Loki...I think...hmm.."The cat's paw went on (Name)'s hand,"Are you agreeing that his name is Loki?"
It kept nodding, while she searched it.
"blah blah...oh it says..."She was mumbling other things, but it was just pish-posh words.
"So he is a gre-I mean Norse Mythology God. Well that is what this description says...but it can't be though...I mean, sure he came from the sky..and now he's...not...Wait a second."
She had stopped talking and was focusing on this kitty who was snuggling against her legs. The thing is this 'cat' we trying to snuggle to the V.
(Name) picked up this 'cat', "I'm gonna pretend you are a certain someone or god or whatever."She then started to snuggle with it against her breasts.
She then closed her laptop and went to asleep.
The next morning was quite interesting.(Name) managed to lose her newly founded cat, finding a new room-mate, and apparently becoming a slave or to be more accurate gaining a slave:
(Name) had awoken, she had horrible bed-hair and her eyes were still droopy. Her body was still somewhat weak.
She was about to cuddle more with the kitty, but it was gone. She gotten up from her bed, and was about to search for it.
"Kitty?Where are you?"She said it in a way she would probably never say it.
An baby-like voice.
She opened her door to see 'Loki' on the couch reading a book.
"Good morning."
"uh...Same to you, but where were you last night?Or were you that ca-"
"Yes I was. Please inform me of something, why does Lord Voldermort not kill Harry Potter when he has the chance?"
He said, while turning to (Name), she could see he was on the last book. "Also is it normal and or mandatory for midgardian authors to kill off their characters at the end of each series?"
(Name)focused her eyes and mind on him,"Um...I don't now, some villain cliche?And no it's not...but now people kind of expect it." She sat next to him.
"So you are a god. A Norse Mythology god. A god of mischief and lies." She glanced at him, he did not look up.
"I've already told you that, now please leave me in peace!" He had demanded. She was fidgeting, trying not to make him mad, he was a god after all.
"Loki, how do I explain this?...That book you are reading I must return it to the library before 3 o'clock."
"Do not worry I am almost done reading it."He turned the page.
"I'm going to my room, various reasons"
She slowly got up, becoming more nervous with each step. (Name) opening her door took one last glance behind her, before returning to her room.
She closed the door and leaned against it, only to fall down to her knees.
'Okay, just calm down, He's a god.'She rubbed her temples. 'HE'S A FUCKING GOD'
She was shivering,'I don't know what to do!He can kill me now if he wanted to! Okay, just calmed down.' She breathed in and out, still shaking.
'From what I've researched they say he uses magic. No wonder he's reading Harry Potter.' She got up pacing in her room.'Also in the researching he has a brother, who is also very powerful...now how do I protect myself...?' She sat on her bed laying on her side. 'Nothing in the researching process of yesterday...WAIT'
She bolted from her bed.'Research!Books!The library!'
"yay...!'She mumbled, and gave a small squee.
She started to get dress, smiling at her genius thought.
Picking out some comfortable clothes, and freshing up, she walked back out. Loki was reading 'The Fault in Our Stars' By John Green.
"Hey, where's that-" He pointed to his right where there was this chair. She had only took the one book.
"I'm gonna go, don't wreck touch anything."
"You have no right to tell me what I please,to do so."
'AHHHHHH' (Name) eternally screamed inside, this guy was just freaking her out. As she exited, she gave a relieving sigh.
She started walking to the library. It was not close, but not far. She looked at the book she would be 'returning', this wasn't even a library book this just so happens, to be hers.
She only had said,'library' because she knew, even he had to know what library was.
Now the local library she was going to, was very old. Sure it had, some computers and outlets, but it had been there forever.(Name) wouldn't be surprised if it had been one of the first libraries in the country.
She was half-way there, then a sudden unsure of emotions came rushing to her.
'What if there is no books that can help me?!What if he kills me?!Or worse...slowly kills me and tortures me'
She ran, with all her might, she ran faster and faster.
(Name) stopped, and started inhale.
"My god, that's a long way...Who the heck said it was not that far?!"She tried to catch her breath. Right in front of her was the library.
"Thank god I'm here...They have water."
"That's some good water..."(Name) said, sipping from a paper-cup, filled with water.
"Now, for some real business."She threw the cup away in the trash, and walked towards the far back section of the library. "Now for that book."She whispered to herself.
The old section of the library had stuff about spells, magic, and were other books there such as history books, that would rip if you touched it. (Name) walked to the farthest end, there would be no librarians there, or people, only bugs, and spiders, crawling.
Her main goal was to protect herself, then find something useful like mind-controlled. Before she met this god, she would say this is all poppy-cock, but now...
Now she'd believed anything.
She sneezed, she coughed and got dust all of her. 'Is this worth it?Seriously, a book?With possibly a 50-50 percent chance of actually getting a protective charm...'
"(Name)!I barely didn't recognize, with those spider-webs in your hair!" A voice of behind said.
She turned around to see an old woman hug her." my gosh. Hi, Miss Pixes. I'm so glad to see you!"
This woman, Miss Feth Pixes, had helped and always offered helped in (Name)'s time in need.
She was like a second mother to her.
"Do you need help, my dear?"
(Name) smiled."Yes, I'm looking for a charms book or spell book."
"I have a few in the back...But deary, why would you need them."
"I'm going somewhere, and i...Need protection?" That was not meant to sound dirty."Oh...OKay, I'll get them, follow me." She then led her back in the central part of the library, where she waited.
Sooner than you can say,'Fuck it, I hate you and you. But I love you.', she came. The books seemed a little too heavy for her to carry. (Name) had rushed to help her. "Miss Pixes!You should of told me, I would-a helped you!" She took the books to the nearest table setting all the books.
After searching over books, and testing them on a near by plant she picked only two books. She went to the check-out lane, Miss Pixes was there...waiting?
(Name) had brought the books to her, she had scanned them, and they were checked-out. "Here you go, sweetie!"
"O-Oh!T-Thank you so much!"
Miss Pixes, gave her the books and waved to her. (Name) grabbed the books and walked out.
'This pile...feels heavier...' (Name) thought, walking sluggishly outside. She looked at the two books, but there were now three. The third book, had a strange withered cover. Some dust was it, she didn't bother to clean it, because she would go back and question this.
"What the-"
It was suddenly afternoon, and she was farther from the library, than she should have been. She held the other books with her hand on the side, and struggling to open the book, with one hand. She dropped the other books and use both hand to open to open this mysterious book.
"Maybe there is something interesting in here..." She muttered, sighing softly.
The first page said, Teleportation. "So I have to mutter these words..."
She took a deep breath,"okay...Hunto-caw-dajo" Nothing happened.
"What a bunch of bull-" She fell to the ground,"What the...h-heck..."She laid on the ground, her breathing slowing. She grew tired, her head aching. Her whole body, shaking.
(Name) had closed her eyes, not feeling anything anymore. Her nerves went into a sleep-death-like state.