Jealousy. It consumes every waking moment, every breath, every heartbeat. And right now as she stands with Kureno, looking lonely and out of place in the large room, desperately holding onto a bond that cracks under the weight of her fear... yes, right now Shigure is angry.
"Gure, tell my adorable little brother he should be more loving," comes the loud, carefree voice of his best friend right before slender hands land on his shoulders.
He turns with a broad smile, "don't worry my darling Aya, I have enough love for us both," the declaration is casual, the same as it always is with Ayame, just something to make others uncomfortable. Taboo.
Even as they hold hands and stare into each other's eyes his attention is on Akito and the barely held back hurt-anger he can see clearly visible on her face as she looks at him. Most of the others believe she is male, but even if he was too young to remember the feelings he had on the day she was conceived, even if he did not remember the knowledge he had of her that day, he would know. There is something fundamentally different between a male and a female's view of the world and that is something Ren could never eradicate from her daughter's actions.
Ren. Beautiful, bothersome Ren. Maybe it had been a mistake to sleep with her in retaliation for the closeness of Akito and Kureno, but he has made the choice and he will live with it. If he cannot have Akito, let her realise she cannot have him, not all of him.
Ren had been... well, it had been fun. Age gaps had never bothered him and she really was very beautiful, even if her hatred of Akito made him want to destroy her from the inside out. He had quelled the urge, naturally.
He had practice with such things, Hatori had taught him restraint over the years, and caring. Theirs was a friendship he had learned much from. Ayame was fun, a playmate and a partner in crime, but Hatori was their conscience.
"You're disgusting," Yuki says in response to his and Ayame's display, catching Shigure's attention again as he walks over, always keeping them between him and Akito as if he doesn't even realise he is doing it. "You're both disgusting." The words are a little too cold, but to Shigure's knowledge Yuki has never known kindness outside of Hatsuharu's blundering presence and Sigure's own fake sincerity, so there is no surprise there.
His response is to grin at his cousin and grab him tightly. He knows it irritates and he knows he is loved anyway. No one can dislike the dog, the ever loving, ever loyal dog, they are helpless against him. "Don't worry, I won't forget my dear little Yuki, I love you too." The flirting is automatic, safe, normal in this personality he has constructed for himself. It makes him slightly nauseous, the nicely, nicely of it.
The irritated face has turned blank. "I don't need it." Oh but he does, after the years in that room he does, Shigure knows. He almost even cares.
Yuki gives him up as a lost cause and stalks off to seek some Zodiac members closer to his age, giving Akito a wide berth as he does so, afraid, always so afraid. Shigure supposes he has a reason, what with the mental torture that inevitably happened in that dark, lonely room. Ayame grows bored as well and wanders off to speak to Ritsu, his disciple. Since they are likely to talk about dresses, with massive amounts of apologising from Ritsu, Shigure decides not to follow. Instead he leans back against the door frame and watches his family, content to be on the outside for now.
"It is unusual to see you here nowadays." Hatori, prim and proper as always. Suit, tie, politeness oozing from every pore, even as he strides towards his best friend.
"Hmm." He has not been back since Akito kicked him out. There were the perks of sleeping with her mother, and then there were the consequences. At the moment the consequences suit him just fine, being back 'inside', watching Kureno stand beside Akito and not him, that's painful. "I'm very busy with my writing." He keeps things cheerful, face light and open. Even with the anger it is easy.
"Still making that editor cry?" It is small talk, Hatori doesn't really care about her, Shigure knows.
But he is good at small talk, so he complies and answers. "Mit-chan is very emotional."
"She's at your house waiting for you to finish your novel right now, isn't she?"
Shigure laughs. Hatori really does know him too well. "It's fine, she's fine," he says, though for all he knows one of these days she will actually commit suicide. That might not be so funny, especially if the police blame him.
There is a brief pause, a comfortable silence. Well, it is comfortable for Shigure, maybe Hatori doesn't find it quite so as he breaks it pretty soon.
"Are you going home after this?"
"Unless Hatori wants to give me a check up." The wink doesn't even make Hatori flinch, he is used to it. It is habit now, to act like this, especially in front of Akito. To see the hurt, the pain. Shigure loves it a little, hates it too, but he cannot stop.
Even now he sends his gaze towards her, to catch the stare levelled his way. Akito breaks it. She can't stand the smirk Shigure makes sure is plastered all over his face.
Everyone is around him, playing their parts as members of the Zodiac, and here he is subverting it. The curse is getting weaker and weaker, he can feel it. Whether or not Kureno is still a member of the Zodiac is a question that hasn't yet been asked or answered, but Shigure suspects, with the possessive closeness Akito is keeping him, that he is already 'free'.
Free. It is laughable. If the reason Akito keeps Kureno so close is because his curse has already fallen apart then she has shot herself in the foot. She can claw to pull it all back together all she likes, but it is only a matter of time. Less time, if Shigure has anything to say about it.
Then he will have Akito to himself.
It is the mantra that repeats itself in his head day in, day out. When the curse breaks Akito will be his. And it will break, why else would all members of the Zodiac be born at once?
Hatori is studying him, pensive, stoic as always. Lonely, depressed, angry too, Shigure sees right through to the core, he knows Hatori too well.
"What Tori, you really want to give me a check up?"
"Shigure."
Right. Head back into the game, smile back onto his face. Air of unconcerned nonchalance in the face of Kureno, in the face of Akito's unhappiness. "Sorry, I spaced out." He lets himself grin, sheepish, like a dog caught doing something it shouldn't.
Hatori sighs. Hatori who seems so grown up, but doesn't know a thing, so unhappy.
"I asked how Yuki is doing."
Living all alone with Shigure. "It's fine, fine," Shigure waves away the concern. "A little messy, but we're doing okay."
When he looks over to Yuki he sees the Zodiac rat sitting with Hatsuharu, Rin and Momiji, quiet as the others talk amongst themselves. Rin looks pale, sickly, and she is quiet too. In reality it is Momiji who is carrying most of the conversation. Strong little Momiji. Not strong enough. Weak and breaking under the pressure, trying too hard. Unhappy. Won't let Hatori erase his memory to ease the pain of a mother who abandoned him, screaming her puny little heart out.
Shigure blinks. Huffs a soft sigh. Focuses again on Hatori.
"You should hire a cleaner."
He has his attention back in time to catch what is said this time and replies promptly. "I'm working on it."
He should also find someone to break the curse for him, he is working on that too.
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This is my first Fruits Basket fanfic, so let me know what you thought! Written and uploaded from my kindle, so please point out any mistakes. :)