Disclaimer: Don't own Sweeney Todd. Wish I did. Johnny Depp is delicioso! WAIT! Uhm… I have a buck 27 in my pocket. You think I could buy anything with that? Also, I don't own the song 'I feel pretty'.
Sweeney sat in his chair. He had just finished cleaning up after a particularly messy shaving and was exhausted. He tilted his head back and started humming a happy little tune.
"Bum bum bum,
Bum bum bum,
Bum bum bum." As he was humming, Mrs. Lovett snuck up the stairs and quietly opened the door and watched her Mr. T in a stalkerish way.
"I feel pretty,
Oh so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and gay,
And I pity, any girl who isn't me." Sweeney sang. Mrs. Lovett decided to cut in.
"Lalalalalalalalalalalala!" She sang slightly off key, but Sweeney didn't really seem to notice. He just walked out the door and skipped down the steps with his razor in hand as Mrs. Lovett followed
"I feel charming,
Oh so charming,
It's alarming how charming i feel,
And so pretty that I hardly believe I'm real." Sweeney sang. He got to the bottom of the steps and saw all the people on the street, which made him smile.
"Lalalalalalala" Mrs. Lovett sang as she finally caught up to him. She tried putting her hand in his, but he skipped away before she could. She started skipping merrily down the street, slitting people's throats as he skipped. Mrs. Lovett ran to catch up to him. Sweeney suddenly stopped and looked at his razor.
"See that pretty girl in that mirror there?" Sweeney sang, confusing Mrs. Lovett.
"What mirror where?" Mrs. Lovett asked. Sweeney rolled his eyes.
"Who can that attractive girl be?" Sweeney asked. Mrs. Lovett glared.
"Which one where hum?" She asked jealously.
"What a pretty face" Sweeney sang dreamily, looking at his reflection in the razor.
"Hum"
"What a pretty dress" Sweeney said, looking at Mrs. Lovett's dress. Mrs. Lovett glared
"Hum"
"What a pretty smile," Sweeney sang, looking at himself in the razor again
"Hum"
"What a pretty meeee" Sweeney sang happily.
"Hummm" Sweeney started skipping and slitting people's throats again.
"I feel stunning," He sang, just scraping the top of a little kid's head as he skipped.
"Feel stunning" Mrs. Lovett muttered, running after him again.
"And entrancing" Sweeney sang happily
"And entrancing" Mrs. Lovett sang monotonically
"Feel like running and dancing for joy
for I'm loved by a pretty wonderful boy!" They sang in union. The music stopped and they both snapped back into reality. They looked around and saw that Fleet Street was splattered in blood and covered in dead bodies.
"Oops." Sweeney said. He then put his razor in his pocket and started whistling nervously.
Le Fin
Please review and I shall give you all meat pies.