Easter Egg Hunt…of DOOM !
Note: A holiday-themed IZ fan fiction. Since Zim's previous attempts at colonizing Earthers failed, they try to capitalize on a new holiday. All the young earth children are out in the open, completely vulnerable. Alu develops eggs that release a sleeping gas once they are opened. Once all the children are asleep, the two decide to begin conquering Earth. That is…unless Aurora, Dib, Zaz and DJ uncover their plot and stop them first.
Chapter 1—Who Is this "Peter Cottontail" ?
In recent months, Zim had become complacent and lazy, keeping himself busy only through exercise and finding new games for GIR to play. GIR wasn't too difficult to amuse. Besides, he had been busy seeing Rigel and the two of them were head over heels in love. So long as he was kept away from Zim, he didn't mind how long the crazed Servo-bot was gone. He was feeling a little lonely though. His brain pondered where his sweet buggy-wuggy Alu was doing at this hour, so he decided to call her.
"Oh, hey, schmoogie ! I have some information for you.", Alu began, twirling one of her long antennae in her fingers.
"And what's that, my demented genius ?", Zim responded, a sinister grin popping up on his face.
"Peter Cottontail. He's coming soon.", Alu said, cackling wildly.
"Huh ? Peter Cottontail ? Who is this Peter Cottontail ? Have you gone bonkers ?", Zim asked, seriously wondering if Alu was perhaps suffering a mental breakdown.
"No, I haven't. Unlike you, I have been devoting my time to research. Peter himself is a creation of Beatrix Potter, an Earther who supposedly was a tremendous storyteller. Actually before her, rabbits here on earth were always seen as a sign of fertility and new life. As for the egg, well, that is also a symbol for new life. Mr. Cottontail leaves behind eggs, candies and other delightful goodies for Earthling children to find.", Alu said, with a slightly sinister tone.
"You mean…the Earther children will be vulnerable when they're out in the open hunting for these colored ovals ?", Zim responded, his eagerness growing.
"Yes, yes ! That is exactly what I mean. I have begun manufacturing eggs that contain sleeping gas. By early morning tomorrow, you and I, as well as our servos, will play the role of rather sinister Peter Cottontails.", Alu cackled.
"Oh, Lou, you are deliciously twisted. It's no wonder you cause my squiggedly spooch to tie up in knots every time you concoct something so devilish.", Zim commented. Alu's cheeks fluoresced momentarily.
"You say the sweetest things, schmoogie.", Alu said. The two of them would use this strategy together. The gas wouldn't only affect the kids who breathed it in but anyone in the surrounding area. With everyone asleep, the planet could be lain siege to so easily. Not wasting a single moment, Zim rushed to Alu's side and the two worked tirelessly to set Operation: Easter Lullaby into affect.
Chapter 2—Operation: Easter Lullaby
The next day, Alu and Zim awakened just before dawn and began setting their traps for the entire neighborhood. The two then watched from the comfort of Zim's high-tech monitor, which was receiving images in real time from multiple video recorders. So far, the egg hunts were proceeding as planned and children were falling left and right to the effects of the sleeping gas. Zim high-fived his lady-love and the Irkens stepped outside to begin claiming humans and start conquering the planet. The two were so wrapped up in their future plans of conquest that they hadn't noticed that Aurora, Dib, DJ and Zaz hadn't been affected by the gas, yet.
Zaz had noticed everyone asleep and noticed something coming out of one of the eggs. Before the gas could infiltrate her lungs, she ran back inside and had the rest of the clan walk out in gas masks and protective environmental suits.
"These eggs definitely have some sort of chemical coming out of them…Look at everyone else around us ! Out cold.", Zaz said, concerned. Dib's eyebrows furrowed.
"Zim and Alu must be up to their old tricks again.", he stated, furiously.
"I knew those two must be involved. What will we do ? They've probably started corralling defenseless humans, or worse, called for backup." Aurora said. Aurora, after all her years of being labeled 'strange', now felt that her life could amount to something in siding with the minority.
"They haven't called for backup, yet mother. They're only two Irkens right now, and there are four of us. They're outnumbered.", DJ stated, astutely.
"Let's arm ourselves considerably. They may have forgotten their main nemesis: water.", Dib said, filling up countless water balloons into a wheelbarrow.
Chapter 3—Counter Strike
Alu and Zim had only gathered a few humans as hostages to employ as slaves later when Irk took control over the Earth. So far, their plans were going uninterrupted, while Rigel and GIR frolicked around in a field somewhere.
"Hold it right there, Irken FIENDS !", Dib said, clutching a fist dramatically and trying to look threatening. Zim's calm expression turned into one of pure fury.
"No, I think not, Earther scum !", Alu shouted, pulling a ray gun from her holster and setting her sights on the Earthlings. She began shooting at Dib, Aurora, DJ and Zaz as Zim took his cue to round up the sleeping humans he had collected in a telepathic sphere. No matter how good Alu's aim was, the family dodged her rays at every turn. There was a considerable amount of destruction going on because of the rays themselves, but it didn't matter much to Alu. She just wanted to see the humans die, especially after interrupting what was a perfectly executed plan.
Zim couldn't afford to be distracted at this time. He didn't expect that the shield could be disrupted by a mere water balloon though. DJ fired water balloons as if he were a catapult from the medieval age.
"Take that, foul alien !", he yelled as the balloons pelted him. Zim was incapacitated, his flesh burning at the water's corrosive affects. He could no longer move his "slaves" where he felt fit to do so. Alu's attacks ended and she ran to his side, shielding him from the horrible water balloon counterstrike.
"Go ! You can escape from here. I never considered preparing this far ahead, forgive me !", Alu said, taking on the brunt of the water balloon attack. It hurt her just as badly as it did him, but he was drying off and could make a run back to his base.
"We have to corner him, head him off at the pass.", Aurora whispered as the kids separated and she and Dib caught them before they could escape.
"Curse you BOTH !", Zim and Alu shouted at the top of their lungs. The two Irkens were taken away to be held captive by Dib's family. A so-called "perfect" plot had been turned completely on its head and the two wondered what they would do. Their servo-bots wouldn't be of any help now since they had both surrendered to the powers of spring. So, they would resort to the only help they had…The Tallest.
Chapter 4—Help Doesn't Come From Others, It Comes From Yourself
Alu and Zim sat back to back in their cell, neither one of them speaking to each other. Alu had a pencil-thin communicator on her belt and immediately began relaying the Tallest for their assistance.
"There seems to be a bit of a problem, your Excellencies. You see, Zim and I have been…captured. I am sorry, we have failed you once again.", Alu said, sorrowfully. She could hear Red and Purple laughing their heads off, apparently not paying any attention to their soldiers' plight.
"A little help would be appreciated !", Zim barked over the communicator through gritted teeth.
"You got yourself into this situation. It's not up to US, the exalted ones to help pipsqueaks like yourselves. Besides, we've got more…important manners to attend to.", Purple answered, as another burst of raucous laughter erupted from the thin communicator. It hurt the ears of the young Irkens, who were feeling pretty down in the dumps at the moment. Then, Alu remembered something. Unlike her compatriot, she was prepared, even over-prepared. Again, she began pushing buttons on her belt that began releasing small compartments that lay within it. Zim sighed sadly, becoming a bit annoyed with being in such close confines with her. It was all well and good to be near her, but in this sort of enclosure, it was clammy, cold, chilly and frankly, uncomfortable. She was a bit too close for his liking.
"Eureka.", she whispered as she found a small welding torch inside one of the compartments. She squeezed past Zim and melted the lock from the outside of the steel cell that held them and grasped Zim's hand, a bit rougher than usual.
"Ow, ow, ow…easy with the talons, boogey.", Zim griped as she took him out of the residence of his sworn enemy.
"They don't even know we've gone. Shows them just how smart they think they are.", Alu stated, softly as the two snuck by their captors unnoticed. Their mission would have to be scrapped now since the sleeping gas was wearing off. Again, it was back to the drawing board for the two Irken warriors. There would always be another holiday that they could exploit, but they would have to do some more research before fully understanding how they continued to be thwarted at every turn. Someday, yes, they would be victorious, but now wasn't one of those times, sadly.
Epilogue
Rigel and GIR finally returned to their masters at last after days of cavorting in the forest somewhere, almost completely forgetting they had houses to return to. Love made both servo-bots idiotic like that sometimes. Strangely, the two had returned to their subsequent homes, and their owners hadn't noticed they even left. They were so involved in researching Earther holidays for their next sinister plot that it didn't really matter. Whether it dealt in making mind-controlling chocolates or entrapments bursting out of four-leaf clovers, the two continued on their quest, no matter how many days it took for them to complete world domination. Graciously, we can be thankful love makes the Irken species a bit dumber than usual, but then again, it makes EVERY SPECIES STUPIDER IN THE END.
The End