"What? Garfield's back in town? Nah, it can't be." Eric said but there is an edge to his voice.
"It's true. I saw him in the alley just two days ago. And.." [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] paused to look for the right words. "I think he's going to do something this time."
"No, it's ok. We stopped him last time...We can do it again. I promise." Eric placed a hand on [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME]'s shoulder. "He's just a cat right?"
"You know he's more than just a cat." [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] shrugged off his hand. "He's a monster."
Garfield slithered through the streets. His limbs had fused to his body, he was reverting back to his usual state. He needed lasagna. He could smell it, up above him in an apartment ,on the third floor, of a brick building. He slithered up the side, bricks scratching his slug-like body. The aroma of lasagna intensifies as he climbs into a very conveniently opened window.
Inside a man is taking the lasagna out of the oven. 'Right on time.' thinks Garfield. As the man puts the lasagna on the counter he sees Garfield out of the corner of his eye, moving slowly towards him and his delicious lasagna. The man starts screaming and flailing his arms around. Garfield continues to slowly move towards him. The man is still screaming. Garfield continues to move slowly. Screaming. Slowly moving. Screaming. Garfield finally makes it to the counter where the piping hot lasagna is sat. He shoves the whole tray in his mouth like a snake. He can feel his limbs growing back. Soon he will be whole again. Soon. The man faints.
When Garfield's limbs have finally returned he pulls the tray out of his mouth, and licks his lips. Another victim for Garfield the cat.
The next day the newspaper reads: MANS LASAGNA EATEN BY UNFUNNY CARTOON CHARACTER
"How could we let this happen Eric?" [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] said sadly.
"It's not our fault, [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME]. There is no way we could have saved it."
"A man's lasagna was brutally eaten, Eric. We had a chance to stop him before this happened. ..I should have stopped him in that alley. I just thought...I don't know, I just thought that he might have changed, you know?"
"I know." Eric whispered. "but there's nothing we can do now."
"Do you still have his cell number?" [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] said through tears.
"duh." Eric holds up his phone it has no cool keychains on it because he is a loser.
"can you please call him and tell him that we should really hang out and go to dennys." [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] wipes a tear on their sweater.
"Why? Do you have a plan? Are we going to set up a cool Rube Goldberg-esque trap?"
" No I'm just really hungry and Garfield gets a discount because his dad owns the place."
"I don't really like dennys though."
"Well too bad!" Cool rollerskates appear on [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME]'s feet. [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] rolls over to Eric, grabs his phone, AND does a cool flip while trying to dial Garfield's number. "Hello, Garfield? Meet me at Dennys because we are going to eat at Dennys. Dennys. Yes." Garfield hangs up on [UNPRONOUNCEABLE NAME] but they understand what that means. It means that garfield is really excited to go to dennys and he's running to his clown car so he can go to dennys awww yeah. so they eat at dennys the end.