A/N: Okay, I came up with this idea during my Geometry class and that's pretty much where i wrote this whole story, so it might not be the best. Read my first Zelda oneshot, Midna Says Random Things, to understand something (hopefully) funny in the last part.
Midna Likes Chocolate
Link was at Malo Mart to stock up on his supplies for the next part of his journey.
"Do you have any chocolate?" Link asked the baby behind the counter.
"Uh, yeah, I think we have some in the back-" Malo started to say.
"Did you say chocolate?" Midna asked, popping up out of Link's shadow.
"Midna! What the heck are you doing?!" Link exclaimed.
"What the fudge is that thing?" Malo asked, staring at Midna.
"Shut up! I wasn't talking to you, you freaky little child! And I am a what, not a thing, thank you very much," Midna said. "Now, I'll ask again. Did someone say chocolate?"
"Uh, yeah, I asked if they had any . . .," Link trailed off as Midna's mouth turned up in a creepy smile.
"Chocolate? Chocolate?" Midna's eye started to twitch.
"Midna? Midna, calm down!" Link yelled.
"CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!" Midna said, raising her hands and screaming maniacally.
"Uh-oh. Malo, RUN!" Link yelled, grabbing the baby and bursting out the doors. The people on the streets of Kakariko Village screamed and dove into the nearest building when they saw the Chosen Hero and Malo being chased by an imp with a giant hand coming out of her head. Link eventually called Epona and he and Malo rode all around Hyrule, trying to get away from Midna.
At one point they thought they had lost Midna when they went into Castle Town, but she found them and sent the crowd into a panic. The guards came out of the castle and hid behind their shields while pointing their swords at Midna, but they ran for their lives when she smiled and stuck her tongue out at them.
Midna chased Link and Malo until the sun went down, screaming, "CHOCOLATE!" the whole way. Epona finally couldn't take it anymore and collapsed with exhaustion in the middle of Kakariko Gorge. Link was barely awake and Malo had already fallen asleep. Link woke Malo up as Midna floated over and stopped, hovering in front of them and panting since she was so out of breath.
"Finally! I've been trying to catch you guys ALL DAY!" Midna yelled. Link and Malo sat there cowering, fearing what Midna might do to them.
"I'd like to buy all your chocolate please," Midna said, pulling out 5,000 Rupees from her invisible storage space. Link and Malo slumped to the ground as if they were puddles.
"Thank you for your patronage," Malo said.
* * *
"So, what are you going to do with all of the money you recently acquired, Malo?" Renado asked Malo the next day.
"I'm not sure," Malo replied, debating his options.
"You should give it to charity," Renado suggested. "You could help all of the poor Hylian children who-"
"Heck no!" Malo exclaimed. "I'm not givin' it away! It's my money! Mine! Do you hear me? MINE! BWAHAHAHA!"
Malo started to run towards his store.
"BWAHAHA-ow!" he said as he tripped on his dress (A/N: It looks like a dress to me!), falling flat on his face.
"I'm okay . . ." he called, getting up and walking slowly over to Malo Mart.
* * *
Meanwhile, Link was standing by the bed which Midna was lying in.
"Ugh . . . I feel so horrible . . .," Midna said, putting an arm over her face.
"I told you to stop eating all that chocolate, but did you listen to me? Noooo," Link said. "You had to go and eat 50 chocolate bars in a row and now you're so sick you can't even get up."
"Shut up! Just tell me how to get better!" Midna yelled, glaring at Link.
"Well, you could eat some bread, I guess," Link suggested. "That always helps me when I don't feel good."
"Okay. So, do you have bread?"
"Wait- first I want to know where you got all those Rupees. I don't remember being able to fit that much in my wallet."
"Uh, well, you see, I found this chest under your bed with lots of Rupees in it and . . .," Midna trailed off, looking around but not meeting Link's gaze.
"WHAT?! Midna!" Link yelled.
"Uh, yeah, heh heh, so how about that bread?"
* * *
A/N: So, how did you like it? Review, and please, no flames!
