I NEED HELP. Seriously. This is like, my 5th work in this fandom with this couple in a week. I can't stop writing about them!
So yeah, here it is, an idea I suddenly have because I spent way too much time staring at Daryl (we all do, right), and I had this idea of Paul making a list of the things he loves about Daryl Dixon.
As always, all mistakes are mine and I apologize in advance for them. Don't hesitate to tell me what you thought of it! xx
There was a lot of things that Paul 'Jesus' Rovia loved about Daryl Dixon.
If someone had told him, years ago, that he'd be crazy in love with a 40 y-o redneck with a serious problem when it comes to expressing any form of emotions despite anger, he would have laughed to their faces. And more than once.
But there he was. And now, more than a year after confessing his feelings to the redneck in question (or, he should say, cornering said redneck against the nearest wall, kissing him softly on the lips and praying not to get punched in response), he wouldn't imagine himself anywhere else.
Living with Daryl was pretty easy, surprisingly. He had been living with him for a while before actually dating him officially. After Sasha's death, Maggie went living in one of the big room in the Barrington House with Enid, preparing for the baby's arrival. Jesus was left alone in his trailer for the first time in a while, but quickly realized that Daryl had no place to stay except his front porch. So he had asked the older man if he wanted to crash on his couch for a while, and Daryl never moved out afterwards.
Paul Rovia wasn't easily surprised, if he was honest with himself. Still, he was shocked when, after a few days of cohabitation with the hunter, he found the older man cleaning the trailer with an old broom he'd found on a run. Paul wasn't a control freak, you see, but he liked when things were nice and as tidy as possible. And Daryl didn't look like the kind of person to actually clean after himself, yet there he was. He actually smiled at the sight that day, and Daryl had grumbled something, finishing his task quickly with crimson cheeks.
Falling in love with Daryl Dixon had been easy. Almost as easy as falling asleep, actually. It wasn't like a big revelation, something that happened overnight and left him in shock. It was all the little details that got him. It was the way Daryl would rub his chin when he was thinking. It was the way the older man constantly made fun of himself in front of Paul, trying to hide his insecurities behind small jokes. It was the way he cared so deeply about everyone, and how hard he tried to make everyone's day perfect. And so much more.
Yeah, there was a lot of things that Paul 'Jesus' Rovia loved about Daryl Dixon.
Somewhere, in the back of his mind and jealously kept, he actually made a list of all the things that got him falling head over heals all over again for the hunter. Things that made him feel like a teenager with his first crush when he looked at the man, trying to deal with the pace of his heart and the smile that threatened to show on his lips.
In such a shitty world, Paul never thought he'd get to live something like that. So he keeps remembering this list, each passing day, when he gets actual free time to do some yoga and practice his martial arts, alone with his thoughts.
Of course, the first item on his list is Daryl's smile. Daryl doesn't smile a lot, that's a fact. Even when alone with Paul, he's always staying his true self, grumpy on the outside and soft on the inside. But when he smiles… His smile could light up a whole room. And maybe Paul isn't the most partial person when it comes to the hunter, but this time, he's not exaggerating. He loves when Daryl smiles, sometimes shyly like in the morning when Paul kisses his chin or just below his ear, giving him some time to properly wake up before kissing him flush on the lips. He loves his happy smiles, when baby Hershel giggles in his arms, trying to catch the bangs hanging in front of his eyes. And most of all, he loves the smiles he's giving him when they're alone together. Sometimes for no reasons, sometimes because Paul's acting like an idiot, it doesn't matter. Daryl's smiles are number one on Paul's mental list, and never ceases to make his heart swell almost painfully with love.
He loves when Daryl gets him things from his runs. Most of the time, they go on runs together. They've witness so many things going wrong out there, so many people never coming back, that they don't take chances. They go together, almost all the time. They know how dangerous it is, out there. And they want to stay together in case something bad happens. But every damn time they go on runs, Daryl still surprises Paul. Even when the younger man is trying to keep an eye on him all the time, Daryl still always finds something to give Paul when they come back in Alexandria. Sometimes it's a book, sometimes a scarf, sometimes a new hat. It's always something that never fails to make him smile, and kiss him deeply against the front door.
He loves it when he can feel Daryl's confidence growing. Each time the hunter grabs his hands, or kisses him, Paul feels blessed. It took a long time for the older man to grow confident and comfortable enough to even stop blushing around him, even with his family and friends aware of their relationship. So when Daryl's feeling bold enough to kiss him fully on the lips when Paul's leaving the house, in front of the entire street, or even when he's wrapping his arms around Paul's middle during movie night in the Grimes house, Paul knows what heaven must feel like.
He also loves when they're sharing simple and domestic moments, just the two of them. When Daryl's laying on the couch (cleaning his guns or staring at the empty space, just enjoying the quietness of the house, it all really depends on the moment) and Paul's resting his head on his thighs, Daryl running his hands in his hair… yeah, he cherishes these moments so much. When listening to his friends, before the whole apocalypse mess happened, he had learned from their talks that domesticity was one of the boring sides of a relationship. Paul had never really understood why, but again, he had never been in love at that time. But now, years later, he still didn't. Domesticity was one of the most incredible things he had got to live in the past few years. And spending lazy days in the couch (or in bed, or in the bathtub) with his boyfriend would never grow old. Especially when said boyfriend was running his hands in his hair. Yes, he had a thing with his hair.
He loves the sweet touches, yes, but he also craves for the most intimate touches. He loves it when Daryl almost shyly runs his hand down his torso, enjoying the firmness of his abs and staying below his belly button enough for Paul to give him permission to keep going. He loves that Daryl is always so hesitant when it comes to initiate sex, like he's always afraid that Paul will say no. He loves when Daryl's touches make him shiver, his rough and calloused hands lightening up every nerve in his body. He loves when said hands grab his ass, roughly or more tenderly depending the mood, and presses him flush against his strong body. He loves when Daryl's fingers bring him to climax, in his ass or on his cock, he's not picky, really.
He loves Daryl's body. He could actually write poems on his lover's body, because Paul is utterly convinced that it is the most beautiful body he's ever laid eyes on. Even before the begging of their relationship, he had noticed his hands. He couldn't stop staring, but who could blame him? His hands were big, fingers thick and manly, making his mouth water from the first days he'd worked with him. He loves his arms -who doesn't?, his strong muscles always on display because of his sleeveless shirts, loves when said arms wrap around him and hold him tight. He loves Daryl's strong thighs, hard to the touch when they're pushing on the back of his when they're making love. His movements are always strong and precise, hitting right where he's supposed to for Paul's pleasure. He loves when Daryl's stomach clench when he's coming, muscles sailing for his hands to touch, the tiny spasms of his hips when he flushes them hard against the back of Paul's tights to come deep inside him. He love the roughness of his voice and the softness of his lips against his ears when he moans his pleasure, for Paul and Paul only. He loves the weight of said body resting on his afterwards, when the older man is trying to catch his breath.
He loves the post coital moments, Daryl cuddling against him and not letting go even when he desperately needs to go to the toilet to wash down the sticky come running down his thighs. He loves the way Daryl kisses him and watches him, like he still can't believe that Paul is willing to accept him within his body. He loves everything about sex with Daryl, really, but his favorite thing is to witness Daryl's pleasure and his relaxed face afterwards. Plus, after sex, Daryl always talks a little about his past, his childhood or important moments in his life.
But it's not just sex. Sure, they have sex a lot. Mostly, because Paul is insatiable (but who could blame him, when Daryl's running around all day wearing sleeveless shirts and showing his big arms muscles? God, Paul loves his arms) and being his damn attractive self, and because Daryl could never have imagined that sex could feel this good with someone you love. But there's the sweet moments, also. When they're tired, bloody, beaten up sometimes and all they can do is fall into bed with their clothes on, still spooning like their lives depend on the contact between their skins. Or sometimes, on the lazy mornings, when they're taking five more minutes before waking up and facing the world. When they're kissing lazily, chuckling against each other's skin, letting their hands caress the other's warm and sleepy body.
Paul loves when Daryl wakes up in a good mood (which, often happens lately, since Negan is gone) and smiles against his neck, kissing his way to Paul's mouth and sucking bruises in his neck. He loves when they're both excited, their erection tenting their sleep clothes, but they ignore it to keep kissing and caressing each other. He loves when Daryl chuckles against the tender skin of his belly, when his breath and beard tickles him and he laughs at the older man to stop teasing him. He loves that, even when Daryl's sleeping, his big hands are holding him against his strong chest.
He also loves (he loves it so much it hurts) when there's a reunion with all the leaders, mostly in Alexandria, and Daryl always stays by his side, finding the strength to even grab his hands now. Everyone knows about them. They're all happy for them, but it doesn't stop Daryl's panic when it comes to public affections. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he's still afraid of people's judgements. Paul knows that he's not ashamed of him, or his relationship, he knows that now. He's seen his lover's scars, knows that Daryl always had to hide who he truly was. So he never pushes his lover. But when Daryl grabs his hands in front of Rick, Michonne and their most trusted friends, Paul wants to cry of happiness. And he also wants to kiss him hard, to push him against the wall and drop to his knees to suck him down his throat (but he doesn't, obviously).
He loves when he wakes up and find Daryl looking at him with so much love in his eyes that it makes his skin crawl. He loves that they always share a kiss in the morning, not caring about morning breath at this point, and that most of the time, this kiss heats up very quickly. It's amazing, really. How, after more than two years now, they still can't keep their hands off each other. He loves Daryl's mouth, on his and on any other part of his body, he's not picky. He loves the fact that when Daryl gets an orgasm in the morning, he'll walk around Alexandria with a dumb smile all day long.
He loves the fact that Daryl's not shy about it anymore. Once, not so long ago, he was hiding behind his bangs and staring at the floor when people were teasing him. Now, he was just rolling his eyes, threatening to kick their asses repeatedly. He loves the fact that Daryl isn't that surprised about Paul being excited by him anymore, which tended to break the younger man's heart. The first time they had made love, Daryl looked surprised and even shocked to have the visual proof that Paul was attracted to him. It broke Paul's heart, that someone as beautiful as Daryl (inside and out) would think so less of himself.
But if he was completely honest with himself, Paul could find an endless list of things he loves about Daryl Dixon, and he would take ages (and many more hours of yoga) for him to list them all. It is sometimes the smallest thing, like the way he bites his lower lip when he's nervous, or the biggest, like the way he smiles when he's holding Hershel Jr. in his hands. But it really doesn't matter, anyway. Because the thing is, Paul 'Jesus' Rovia loves Daryl Dixon with all his heart.
And right now, when the man himself is sleeping peacefully next to Paul in the bed, his arm thrown around Paul's bare chest to hold him close, Paul Rovia couldn't think of a better place to be.