Disclaimer: I shouldn't have to do this anymore, but I own nothing
A/N: This was a challenge from my sister who bet me that I couldn't write a fic around the sentences "your hair looks like a poodle giving birth" and "I only like blue underwear"
"You don't have to do this, Chlo." Aubrey sighed, as she drove her and Chloe over to her brother, Josh's apartment. "We don't have to hang out with them, you don't even have to know they exist."
Chloe rolled her eyes, befriending Aubrey's family was important to her, how was she supposed to be with Aubrey when she knew that the people she came from hated her? It only made sense to try to bond with them, besides, Aubrey had bonded well with Chloe's father, who loves to talk to the blonde about laws and other things that Chloe doesn't even try to understand.
"Come on, Bree." Chloe whined, placing her hand on Aubrey's thigh. "You get to be friends with my family! Why can't I be friends with yours? Are you ashamed of me?"
Aubrey scoffed, glancing over at Chloe. "We've been through this, Chloe, my family is embarrassing. They'll ask you invasive questions and make you uncomfortable. I don't want you to be uncomfortable."
"Aubrey, just stop." Chloe groaned, crossing her arms. "I want to meet them without your dad casting his ominous shadow on our fun time."
"My dad isn't ominous." Was all Aubrey said, turning into the car park.
"Have you met your father?"
"Yes and he's a great dad."
"I'm not saying he's a bad dad, I'm saying that he scares the piss out of me!"
"He shouldn't."
"He cleans his guns for fun."
"He's never killed a man in America."
"In America."
"What happens in Vietnam stays in Vietnam."
"I thought you were going to say World War II."
"He's not that old." Aubrey sighed, climbing out of the car.
"He fought in Nam." Chloe replied, following Aubrey to her brother's building.
"Toward the end." The blonde grumbled. "Then he and my mom had David."
"Ew." Was all Chloe said, walking through the door that Aubrey held open for her. "Thanks, babe."
"Josh and Brad live together." Aubrey said, leading Chloe to the stairs, which were right next to the elevator.
"Aw, are you sad that you don't get a bestie-brother?"
"No."
"You are!"
"No, I'm not."
"Then why are you mad at me?"
"I'm always mad at you."
"That's true." Chloe nodded, elbowing Aubrey a little. "But you know that you wanted to be close to your brothers."
"I hated them." Aubrey said coldly. "Well, not Dave or Dan, they moved out before I got locked in dumbwaiters or strapped to chimneys."
"What the hell?" Chloe stopped, her eyes wide. "A dumbwaiter? Like for how long?"
"A few hours." Aubrey shrugged, grabbing Chloe's hand. "Not long enough to develop a phobia or anything."
"How did-"
"Dave found me. Dad wasn't home..."
"Good lord."
"We grew up since then, Chloe." Aubrey pulled Chloe up a few more stairs before leading her down the hall. "Besides, I don't even remember who did it."
"Was it Josh?"
"No, it was Michael but that's beside the point."
"You just-"
"Hush."
Aubrey knocked on the door twice, before a tall man with curly brown hair answered, he wasn't wearing a shirt, though that didn't seem to phase Aubrey at all. Chloe recognized him immediately, it was Josh. She took a moment to appreciate the Posen genes, how could they all be that attractive? It just wasn't right. Josh smiled at the women, before looking down at himself and laughing.
"Sorry, kids." He said, waving them into the apartment, which was as immaculate as Aubrey's. "I just got out of the shower."
"I can tell." Aubrey replied with a laugh, looking at her brother's hair. "You need a hair cut, your hair looks like a poodle giving birth..."
"Dude," An even taller blond man entered the living room, he was wearing a shirt. "I said that he looked like Will Ferrell in Zoolander! But yours just adds to the ick factor. Kudos."
"Hi, Brad." Chloe smiled, waving her hand a little.
"Hi, Chloe." Brad grinned, shaking Chloe's hand while Josh tossed a shirt on. "I see you haven't found someone better than my little sister yet."
"I'm definitely going to be talking about this in therapy." Aubrey rolled her eyes, before hugging her brother.
"If this is why you need therapy, you're the lucky one." Josh laughed, shaking Chloe's hand. "Joshua Posen, medical student. One day, I'll say M.D. and life will be great."
"It'd be better if you said architect." Chloe replied seriously. "Architects get all the ladies."
"Yeah we do." Brad nodded, sitting on the black leather sofa.
"Where's your girlfriend?" Aubrey asked, pulling Chloe to sit beside her.
"Don't rub your catch in my face." Brad warned. "We both know that I could steal her like-" He snapped his fingers. "That."
"I don't like boys..." Chloe said, making Brad deflate.
"Sexuality is fluid, if I found a hot guy, I'd bang him." Josh shrugged, walking over with a couple beers. "Still don't drink, Squirt?"
"Nope." Aubrey shook her head and caught the Sunny D bottle that was thrown at her.
"Loser." Brad shook his head, handing Chloe a beer bottle. "You?"
"Only when the mood strikes me." She said with a laugh, accepting the beer.
"God, why are you dating my sister?" Josh mumbled. "You're cool and she's a wet blanket!"
"You just called me a wet blanket." Aubrey pointed out. "That makes you a loser."
The four laughed, before beginning to talk about school, work, how The Colonel had moved from South Carolina to North Carolina, pretty much anything that seemed remotely interesting. Chloe laughed at their dumb jokes and commented on how it must run in the family, which caused each Posen to roll their eyes. The redhead had no idea why Aubrey had been so weird about her brothers. they seemed like fun people, especially since their father wasn't breathing down their necks.
"So, Chloe, what are you studying?" Josh asked, his smile still in place.
"I," Chloe glanced at Aubrey, who was shaking her head slightly. "I'm going into teaching-"
"A teacher?" Brad raised an eyebrow. "Really? I mean, that's like the worst job ever."
"Because paving the path to our country's future is terrible." Aubrey snapped, making Brad put his hands up in defense.
"Well, I think it's great." Josh took a sip of his beer. "You get paid to take care of nasty ass kids-"
"Stop." Aubrey growled, slamming down her bottle of Sunny D. "Seriously, it's not funny and it's not cute. You can't judge people like that, okay? So just stop it!"
"Bree, it's okay..." Chloe murmured, touching Aubrey's arm, but the blonde would have nothing of it.
She stood up and grabbed Chloe's hand, casting a glare at each brother before marching out the door. Chloe's eyes remained wide as Aubrey stomped down the stairs, making it increasingly harder for her to keep up. They reached the car in record time, but Aubrey still wasn't in the mood to talk. Her face was bright red, but her knuckles were stark white from how hard she had been balling her fist. Her normally calm face was filled with a rage that Chloe had never seen and her body was stiff as a board.
"I'm sorry." Was all Aubrey said, starting the car and pulling out of the complex.
"Aubrey, nothing happened." Chloe said, putting her hand on Aubrey's shoulder, only to have the blonde shrug it off.
"Yet." Aubrey growled. "Nothing happened yet. That's how it starts! First it's just teasing, then it gets uncomfortable, then next thing you know, you're trying not to cry in a bathroom, while everyone is laughing at your life choices!"
"... Baby..." Chloe grabbed one of Aubrey's hands, holding it gently in her own. "I'm-"
"Don't be sorry, it's all fine." Aubrey replied quickly, taking a sharp turn. "I'm fine."
"If you say so, I'll believe you." Chloe shrugged, watching as Aubrey took a deep, cleansing breath. "I love you."
"I love you, too." Aubrey murmured.
"Wanna play a game?"
"Sure."
"Guess what colour underwear I'm wearing!"
"Blue."
"How-"
"You only wear blue underwear."
"I only like blue underwear..."