In the year 19 BBY, on a planet with over a trillion sentient life forms, in a huge, tall, impressive-looking building, sat a tall, old human man and a small, old green alien.
The man's name was Palpatine and he was the Chancellor of the Galactic Republic, and the alien was named Yoda and he was the Grandmaster of the Jedi Order. They were sitting in Palpatine's office in Coruscant, with a desk between them, and they were discussing some very important topics. Topics that could affect the galaxy.
"Chug! Chug! Chug!" yelled Palpatine excitedly as Yoda attempted to down an entire two-liter bottle of Coke.
. . .Okay, maybe they weren't. It had started more serious but Palpatine had somehow convinced the tiny Jedi to take on this task. How he had succeeded, most people wouldn't know, but a fact known to little was that Palpatine was the Sith Master and had used some Force trickery on Yoda to "persuade" him.
Yoda, enjoying the fizzy taste of the caffeinated beverage, drained the last drops and let out a massive burp that would have been more suited to a Sarlaac.
"Ah! In my nose, this fizz is," exclaimed Yoda, clutching his nose yet grinning. Palpatine laughed.
"That was cool," he grinned. "The last time I saw a chugging session like that was . . . well, never."
"Thank you, I must," replied Yoda. "Never done this before, I have. Love it, I do!"
The two were grinning incessantly when the holoprojector on Palpatine's desk began beeping and flashing. Without thinking, the Chancellor answered it.
A small, pale blue, wavering hologram of Count Dooku appeared and stood on the desk. The Jedi stiffened, though Palpatine didn't register it immediately
"Master Sidious," said Dooku, bowing, "what are our plans for attacking Coruscant?"
Palpatine turned white as a sheet and his eyes swiveled to the hologram. Eyes flashing yellow, he shouted, "You idiot! I told you not to call me! Yoda is here!"
Dooku looked mortified and said hurriedly, "Oh, jeez, I'm sorry, master!"
"Don't apologize! I'll punish you later!"
Hyped up on caffeine, Master Yoda leaped over the desk and impaled Palpatine through the stomach with his lightsaber, as he knew that Palpatine was now the Sith Lord the Jedi had been looking for.
Yoda returned his shoto to his belt as Palpatine fell against his desk. Glaring at Dooku, Palpatine spat and hissed "You idiot!"
"It was an accident," said Dooku lamely, seconds before Palpatine died.
Stepping on Palpatine's carcass Yoda face the hologram. "A question, I have for you, Count Dooku."
Had it been anyone else Dooku would immediately have cut off the connection. But a fact known to little was that he admired Yoda's weird way of speaking, so instead Dooku leaned forward, and said, "Go on."
Yoda smirked. "Chug a two-liter bottle of Coke, can you?"
A/N: This was written in 2014, when I was fifteen and not as good with writing. While searching through Google Docs, I found this, and I thought I'd publish it despite its age and questionable quality. It has been unchanged except with updated formatting to make it more readable. Hopefully you enjoyed!